napy666 Posted May 17, 2013 Posted May 17, 2013 I made a post of this one guy who lives in PA and I'm in California. We've been talking for about a month but he drops the bomb on me today that his EX-Girlfriend is having a kid and it's his. Now me I NEVER EVER want to have kids, from having them myself to adoption to even this type of situation, I NEVER WANT KIDS IN MY LIFE PERIOD. So now I don't know what to do about this guy and his situation. I really don't want to deal with this but I was really liking this, he was one of the first guys who really liked me, and showed a lot of interest, and I thought he would be the "one". But this bomb has been dropped now I don't know what to do.
CC12 Posted May 17, 2013 Posted May 17, 2013 Well, I guess there's a chance that he won't be involved in the kid's life at all, but would you want to be with a person like that? Differing opinions on the kids/no kids thing is pretty much a deal breaker. It's likely that this won't be the first relationship you'll have to end because of it. It sucks, but it's not fair for either party to give up major life goals like this one. 1
Author napy666 Posted May 17, 2013 Author Posted May 17, 2013 I never want kids ever in my life period. 1
Author napy666 Posted May 17, 2013 Author Posted May 17, 2013 Then Mr. Drama, who obviously doesn't understand the meaning of contraception, is not the guy for you. For the next umpteen years, he's in for lots of fighting, animosity, and tons and tons of court battles and child support reviews, because that's what happens when ex's are stupid enough to have babies together. And what IF he does not want to take care of the kid AT ALL?
Author napy666 Posted May 17, 2013 Author Posted May 17, 2013 are you okay in your mind????????//:eek: What do you mean?
Author napy666 Posted May 17, 2013 Author Posted May 17, 2013 Well I cut that guy off, he wanted the kid, he kept saying how he knew how it was to be without a dad, since he didn't have a dad, and he wanted to be in the kid's life blah blah blah so screw him and his kid. 2
dreamingoftigers Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 Jeez sounds like he dodged a bullet too.... 10
delighted_delilah Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Well I cut that guy off, he wanted the kid, he kept saying how he knew how it was to be without a dad, since he didn't have a dad, and he wanted to be in the kid's life blah blah blah so screw him and his kid. You're deranged. Thank goodness you won't be reproducing. There is NOTHING wrong with not wanting kids, or not wanting to have kids in your life at all. I applaud people who have the guts to make that decision and stand by it; society pressures people to have families and truthfully, there are so many people who just shouldn't go there. Not a thing wrong with them either. What makes you deranged, in my opinion, is this 'screw him and his kid' attitude. Just disgusting. 6
rainfall Posted June 21, 2013 Posted June 21, 2013 I never want kids ever in my life period. With you on this 100% but I don't think I would have a screw him and his kid viewpoint. I think I'd just wish him the best and say since we want different things we probably shouldn't waste each others time. 1
Author napy666 Posted June 21, 2013 Author Posted June 21, 2013 Now he is unsure on if this kid is even his its too early in the pregnancy to tell. So may not even be his kid.
Author napy666 Posted July 11, 2013 Author Posted July 11, 2013 In the end he found another girl he wanted to be with over me. So screw him i don't need him.
MidwestUSA Posted July 11, 2013 Posted July 11, 2013 Oh, this is the parole dude that you've never actually met who can't leave the state to be with you and your mom. Yea, screw him.
snowflakes88 Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 ^^ Haha! He wanted to be a father to his child and take care of his disabled mother, instead of moving across the country to be with a grown woman living at home with no job. What a dirtbag! 1
Lisa_Lisa Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 Girl, work on yourself and on making your life better. Make that paper, save your money and move out. You don't need that loser. There are plenty of men without kids in this world.
Author napy666 Posted July 14, 2013 Author Posted July 14, 2013 Yeah I guess. Turns out this new girlfriend he went with instead of me is moving in with him and probably doing him in as well. So becuz I didn't do that he didn't wanna be with me I guess.
EsmerKiss77 Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 (edited) If you do decide to pursue the relationship just keep in mind plenty of factors will come in to play: his baby mama, him being a part of the child's life, you accepting the child, etc. If you find you're not ready for all that, just move on. There's nothing wrong with that. Otherwise, you will need to go into it accepting the situation as a whole kid included. Edited September 1, 2013 by EsmerKiss77 didnt see last post!!!!
Tayla Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 Since this so called scenario has been resolved, may you learn well from it.
Author napy666 Posted September 1, 2013 Author Posted September 1, 2013 It is resolved. BUT I found a new guy and he has a kid BUT the kid is living and staying with the mom while he moves out to California to be with me and help his business. He says he will still see his kid but I am not going to be involved in anyway. Also this guy knows I hate kids and never want kids at all in my life. So when that time comes for him and his kid to get together I will just be at my parents or at a hotel while they hang out I guess hahaha.
EsmerKiss77 Posted September 3, 2013 Posted September 3, 2013 It is resolved. BUT I found a new guy and he has a kid BUT the kid is living and staying with the mom while he moves out to California to be with me and help his business. He says he will still see his kid but I am not going to be involved in anyway. Also this guy knows I hate kids and never want kids at all in my life. So when that time comes for him and his kid to get together I will just be at my parents or at a hotel while they hang out I guess hahaha. Just curious- how do you expect to have a lasting relationship with a man who has a kid, when you're not willing to accept the kid? Id think anyone with a child wouldn't play that for very long, and if they do there's something deeper that's wrong. How old are you?
Author napy666 Posted September 3, 2013 Author Posted September 3, 2013 Going on 26 and what do you mean?
EsmerKiss77 Posted September 3, 2013 Posted September 3, 2013 I just mean like are you planning to be serious with this guy? And if so, how is it gonna work if you are never around his kid or accept that part of him?
Author napy666 Posted September 3, 2013 Author Posted September 3, 2013 I want to be serious with him and I just will never accept his kid.
clia Posted September 3, 2013 Posted September 3, 2013 I want to be serious with him and I just will never accept his kid. Have you told him this? How do you expect to have a relationship with a man who has a kid if you dislike kids so much? You do realize that the kid will be spending time at his house, don't you? And that he's going to have to devote time to the kid? If you end up living with this guy, that means the kid will be living with you also. It's not realistic at all to think you can just ignore the kid, and I can't think of any decent father who would date a woman who did that. 1
Author napy666 Posted September 3, 2013 Author Posted September 3, 2013 Well it turns out that him and I talked about this last night and he says his kid will not be with him period becuz the mom has the kid and her and the kid went out of the country. So we're good on the kid thing and he understands my views in not wanting kids.
Recommended Posts