DelusionalOne Posted May 17, 2013 Share Posted May 17, 2013 Out of curiosity I just had to count because I honestly lost track. I know it's coming up on 4 months so I did some counting.... Today is NC Day 100. I never thought I would make it that far. I didn't think I could. Then I would come out here and read. It help shake off the illusion that I was or it meant anymore than it was. I would feel sick to my my stomach and it was just enough of a shock to keep me from doing something I would regret. 100 days later is NC easier? Yes. Is it easy? No. Do I still miss him? Yes. Can I function normally thru the day? Yes. I Do still feel pain but it is not debilitating like it was in the beginning. I think he has finally gotten the hint and I shouldn't hear from him again. NC REALLY suck when they breadcrumb you. Every one sent me into a tailspin. The next 100 days should be easier. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Goodbye Posted May 18, 2013 Share Posted May 18, 2013 How is your ex breadcrumbing you? Do you still cry? Link to post Share on other sites
Author DelusionalOne Posted May 18, 2013 Author Share Posted May 18, 2013 (edited) We work in the same company so he was able to reach out to me using company means...email/IM. Last time I got a breadcrumb was about 2 weeks ago now. Goodbye... I wish I could say that I don't cry but occasionally I do. Usually after a breadcrumb though. It is excruciatingly hard to reject someone when your heart is screaming out for you to do the opposite. I am on vacation for the next 12 days so he can't get in touch with me at all. This will be a good way for me to detach from all of it. Edited May 18, 2013 by DelusionalOne 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wellington Posted May 18, 2013 Share Posted May 18, 2013 WOW!! What's your secret for staying strong D-O?! Im so proud of you. Isn't it funny, I have no problem ignoring men where I have zero interest. I don't feel badly, and could care less about responding to them, but the minute HIS name pops into my inbox or my phone, my heart instantly starts to pound. Even if it has been a month of NC. How do I get to the point of flicking that switch in my brain that will throw him into the "do not care" pile?! Link to post Share on other sites
Author DelusionalOne Posted May 18, 2013 Author Share Posted May 18, 2013 Wellington, I wish I could tell you there is some great secret to staying NC but there isn't for me. Like everyone else, it's one day at a time. A lot of it is pride... I can not be a doormat. Unfortunately, I haven't flicked the switch to "do not care" mode. My feelings for him have not diminished even the slightest bit. And it's not like he's breadcrumbing me with I love you or I miss you... It's such random stuff or work related excuses. NC is best for both of us. There is no happy ending for us... It's an impossible situation. And Dday was the single most painful experience of my entire life... I never want to feel that way again. These are the thoughts/feeling that keep me NC... And will continue to keep me NC. Link to post Share on other sites
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