Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 At such early stage, it is meanless/useless/wasting engergy to back-and-forth debate this kind of thing. Because it can go on and go on and go on and go on.....and getting nowhere. Too many women are doing those kind of useless discussion with excessive emotion. This is NOT MY THING. So to answer your question - simple, I don't know. I don't have anyone to divorce, it is not my split. I am going to leave MM alone, let him handle his thing. Not my business that how to handle/split their assets/or $$$. mount wrote, " Even though he loves the marital house with wife, but he determines to leave the house once he outs the news to his wife and plans to stay in hotel close to workplace and my place for a month unless his wife volunteers to leave the house. " First, mount, I am actually Really happy to hear about this MM telling you he is FINALLY thinking about being Honest w/his W! I am so horribly, sadly, happy for His Wife! Then once his D is finalized, I will be happy for You* Regarding the post above... what would you do if MM's Wife leaves the house he loves so much? How in the WORLD could you EVER live in Their Marital Home?! I find that quite disturbing... You've made it Very clear the guys got cash. Why, when you two are finally together, wouldn't you want a place the two of you can make Your Home? Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 Regarding the post above... what would you do if MM's Wife leaves the house he loves so much? How in the WORLD could you EVER live in Their Marital Home?! I find that quite disturbing... You've made it Very clear the guys got cash. Why, when you two are finally together, wouldn't you want a place the two of you can make Your Home? Not 'disturbing'. For some folk, property is property (or real estate). It's a bunch of bricks (or whatever) and houses can easily get a facelift or refurb. I wouldn't set too much store behind that being an option. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 (edited) Don't you not feel your following statement/questions is SO MEANLESS OR POINTLESS at this forum (too late to be useful)? It is so typical women's logically conflicting and dead-loop talking. He is a MM at this point, clear? And what forum are we in right now? The other man/woman forum, correct? So what we are talking about under this topic? a MM in order to be single, what he needs to do? Divorce, correct? Does my above words make sense to you? Aren't you going to start from all beginning like why can' t you(I) be with a single man...etc useless/meanless question? Those kind of why why why, how can you do such thing...etc typical women victim mind-set questions? Again reality: "I won't wait for him for sure, if his situation with wife gets sticky. I will wash my hands and leave the MM. Crystal clear, no here and there, no should/could/would." His 'situation,' with his wife IS sticky now, what keeps you around today? Maybe his promises to you will not be empty, but I would not hold your breath. But then again you may become the partner his OW wishes the same for in the future. This is the reality you face. These men may be fun for a spin, but a serious relationship, the odds are bad. Edited May 21, 2013 by Mount Link to post Share on other sites
ComingInHot Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 Silly girl wrote, " Not 'disturbing'. For some folk, property is property (or real estate). It's a bunch of bricks (or whatever) and houses can easily get a facelift or refurb. I wouldn't set too much store behind that being an option." I agree. For some they just don't mind. It just weird me out no matter how many coats are put on it. Mount wrote, " So to answer your question - simple, I don't know." Everything you wrote after that didn't answer anything I asked of You. Thanks mount* Link to post Share on other sites
ComingInHot Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 mount wrote, "Don't you not feel your following statement/questions is SO MEANLESS OR POINTLESS at this forum (too late to be useful)? It is so typical women's logically conflicting and dead-loop talking. He is a MM at this point, clear? And what forum are we in right now? The other man/woman forum, correct? So what we are talking about under this topic? a MM in order to be single, what he needs to do? Divorce, correct? Does my above words make sense to you? Aren't you going to start from all beginning like why can' t you(I) be with a single man...etc useless/meanless question? Those kind of why why why, how can you do such thing...etc typical women victim mind-set questions?" Sheesh mount. ouch. Rational being your claim doesn't much show per the above statement. SSerenity was sharing her opinion, here, on an open forum, where people offer their different perspectives Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 I agree with you. I forsee things should be getting more complicated than just just logitical arrangement. That is why I keep warning him, emotional outcome from his wife side may be more difficult to handle rather than accommodations. Yes he will get legal information/advice. He admitted to me, he is dreading the moment that he is outing to his wife; however, he is crystal clear that that is only way for him moving forward the relationship with me, that is why he voluntarily wants to do it. We have been secretly seeing each other almost 1 year, that is ENOUGH. He wants to do things openly/in public with me, vice versa. If standing in his shoes, I fully understand. Have been in long marriage so long, and now he is going to tell wife he is leaving the marriage. Well mount, sounds like you've got it all figured out. Good luck with it all. I do find it odd, that he's making all these plans, yet has failed to consult a lawyer. Good luck with that. He may be planning on a 4k rental, but it's likely once the Dday (if it indeed happens) he will be looking for something a tad more modest. I'm sure his BS will have other plans for their life savings. Wow! Link to post Share on other sites
ComingInHot Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 mount wrote, " The question you were asking is typical betray spouse kind - how can you, how could you....other wife's marital house...blah blah..." Eh. Wrong answer. I was trying to look at it from a position of a woman coming into the marital home After a D or a death. But you could say that yes, it is foreign to me to imagine the scenario as a "other woman", so I use what I can to try and relate. No chasing tail here* Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 :eek: Putting on for show? For what? I am multi-tasks typing here, whilst doing other works in another screen...Do have such extra time to spare? Whatever you say.... Here is the thing - my whole life philosophy, 1) I don't believe words, only believe results. 2) When I want something (set any goal), I will always get it by strategy or by willpower; 3) I don't share things with other/another people, short term maybe, but not long term, that is not me. My advice is not coming from a BS. I may be misunderstanding your posts. The sentence structure is awfully hard to read. When one tends to post as if they have no weaknesses toward such a hairy situation, that even a highly intelligent, strong woman would have no problem explaining and questioning her weaknesses, it makes me wonder how much you are putting on for show. But the again affairs are NOT reality, and when and if the time comes and you are living in the real world with your AP, this is when the harsh reality will sink in. But, hopefully it will work out, in a few instances it has. Link to post Share on other sites
ComingInHot Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 Serenity, Sorry if I overstepped by commenting in your stead. The response to your comment seemed riddled w/animosity and angst against your perspective instead of seeing it as something that while ultimately the OP disagrees with, maybe should be considered for her own protection against possible heartbreak that Most of us Still hope she can avoid, with or w/out this MM* Link to post Share on other sites
ComingInHot Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 mount wrote, " Just because you don't like the content from the post/reality itself, it does not mean it is not happening. Affairs, or Divorces are happening every second, every mintue, every place on the earth." I think you're just messing w/me now mount . Lol! Otherwise, you are actually Upset that I wrote, " First, mount, I am actually Really happy to hear about this MM telling you he is FINALLY thinking about being Honest w/his W! I am so horribly, sadly, happy for His Wife! Then once his D is finalized, I will be happy for You*" Maybe you missed this part? Whatever mount. I Really do wish you Peace Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 The reality is that in real world, lots of things are happening that you do not want to see, unfortunately it is what it is. Talking about hearbroken, I am too old (>35y/o) to be heartbroken, I am not some teenage, or 20ish women. Also I am not divorcing anyone, or be divorced by anyone. I am living normal life day and night. By the way, I highly recommend that every woman should think like a man, otherwise some women are doomed to be victims for sure. Serenity, Sorry if I overstepped by commenting in your stead. The response to your comment seemed riddled w/animosity and angst against your perspective instead of seeing it as something that while ultimately the OP disagrees with, maybe should be considered for her own protection against possible heartbreak that Most of us Still hope she can avoid, with or w/out this MM* Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 I agree that part for sure. Comparing to so many stories here D-day, D-day...2nd D-day, at least this MM is stepping up, voluntarily telling/informing his wife about his leaving. I only see my posts get you guys responding endlessly, I can guess the reason....Likewise, may you have the peace, and have some closures for what happened in your past. mount wrote, " Just because you don't like the content from the post/reality itself, it does not mean it is not happening. Affairs, or Divorces are happening every second, every mintue, every place on the earth." I think you're just messing w/me now mount . Lol! Otherwise, you are actually Upset that I wrote, " First, mount, I am actually Really happy to hear about this MM telling you he is FINALLY thinking about being Honest w/his W! I am so horribly, sadly, happy for His Wife! Then once his D is finalized, I will be happy for You*" Maybe you missed this part? Whatever mount. I Really do wish you Peace Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 The reason you stay on my post is.....? That is not helping me/my post or yourself either. So.....? If MM does not proceed next month as he keeps saying (that he wants to), I will feel relieved a bit. Again if I said above, you people will say I don't love him....I am sincerely in the relationship with him....etc etc. Some women always have something to say.... So in summary, I will let the MM do whatever he wants to do/proceed. He is OLDER enough to make decision on his own which he claims he has been so far. And selfishly I don't want any repercussion from their split or whatever happening betwen them. I understand, although still not understanding this thread, lol, which I will back away from. The MM still has not told his wife, and has not experienced her reaction, and I have failed at attempting to have the OW look at it at from a realistic viewpoint. She popped a blood vessel from simple responses on a message board, and for this reason alone sense a weapons of mass destruction type explosion if he happens to have a change of heart. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 I also hope everyone does things/ talks things making sense, always leading to certain results(more postive more better). That is how I have been raised/educated. I do hope MM is a conjunction, other then that I wish you well. Link to post Share on other sites
ilovedhim Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 The reason you stay on my post is.....? That is not helping me/my post or yourself either. So.....? If MM does not proceed next month as he keeps saying (that he wants to), I will feel relieved a bit. Again if I said above, you people will say I don't love him....I am sincerely in the relationship with him....etc etc. Some women always have something to say.... So in summary, I will let the MM do whatever he wants to do/proceed. He is OLDER enough to make decision on his own which he claims he has been so far. And selfishly I don't want any repercussion from their split or whatever happening betwen them. So if it matters not why ruin his marriage? If it does not matter and you will be relieved if he does not confess, tell him not to hurt his wife for you. Does he know you feel this way? When this d day happens I bet you anything his wife will fight for him... if for nothing else but to make sure you don't rob her of years of investment in this man. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 I won't wait for him for sure, if his situation with wife gets sticky. I will wash my hands and leave the MM. Crystal clear, no here and there, no should/could/would. You know I'm tough with you, so Mount, I'm gonna hold your feet to the fire on this. IF it happens that your MM balks and chooses not to leave and divorce, I do hope you walk away and have it in you to really let go and move on. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Tinie Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 Mount, why bother coming on here and asking for help if you're just going to get all defensive when people offer opinions that you don't agree with? Sheesh. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted May 21, 2013 Author Share Posted May 21, 2013 I am not asking for help. As the opening post of this thread, I was just doing a bit update only. And those opinions are mostly or seem to be from betrayed spouses lashing out their grudges on this post's content, which is quite not helping here. Mount, why bother coming on here and asking for help if you're just going to get all defensive when people offer opinions that you don't agree with? Sheesh. Link to post Share on other sites
Lillyfree Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 maybe write a journal entry next time? or do you start threads so everyone can reply with 'well done, here's a pat on the back, you are amazing and we all wish we could be like you'. you DO understand what a *discussion* is? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted May 21, 2013 Share Posted May 21, 2013 We'll fix it in the morning. Say goodnight Gracie. Link to post Share on other sites
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