underwater2010 Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 Since I have discovered my FWH's affair there are a few movies that can trigger me. And more than a few of my former favorites have been absolutely ruined. Yet, others have given me a source of strength. The one that I have loved for a long time is Spanglish with Adam Sandler. Here is a list of why I still love this movie after the affair: 1. It shows the true destruction of an affair. 2. It does not paint the BS in a negative light. 3. It shows that two people can feel and attraction yet not act on it, solely based on character and vows. 4. It shows how one's own issues lead them to an affair. 5. It shows that one's lot in life does not define who they are. 6. It completely dispels the myth of the grass is greener. 7. The AP, WW and BH are not portrayed as unattractive people. 8. It shows that the damage we do to ourselves, is the worst of all. If you have never seen this movie I highly recommend it. I find myself totally relating to the BH and the hired help. I never saw my marriage going down in flames and always try to keep my drama to a minimum. I could see my husband struggling the same way the WW was struggling, but would never in a million years thought he was capable of an affair.
Author underwater2010 Posted May 22, 2013 Author Posted May 22, 2013 Anybody else have movies to add? Or have you watched this movie and what did you think? Should I add that all are welcome to respond?
NotCamelot Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 I have not seen that one......but we will this week. The one I don't think I can ever see again is Unfaithful with Richard Gere and Diane Lane.
Author underwater2010 Posted May 22, 2013 Author Posted May 22, 2013 I have not seen that one......but we will this week. The one I don't think I can ever see again is Unfaithful with Richard Gere and Diane Lane. Can you give me the basic plot....I am not sure I have seen that one.
Spark1111 Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 Unfaithful is a movie I told my fWH not to watch as it would trigger HIM! Happy marriage, but she feels ignored, bored, and out of sorts.....and crashes into a lover.... Yeah, I think it rings true. Watch together at your own risk. 1
sweet_pea Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 A recent-ish movie was "Something Borrowed" with Kate Hudson in it.
latergater Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 Since I have discovered my FWH's affair there are a few movies that can trigger me. And more than a few of my former favorites have been absolutely ruined. Yet, others have given me a source of strength. The one that I have loved for a long time is Spanglish with Adam Sandler. Here is a list of why I still love this movie after the affair: 1. It shows the true destruction of an affair. 2. It does not paint the BS in a negative light. 3. It shows that two people can feel and attraction yet not act on it, solely based on character and vows. 4. It shows how one's own issues lead them to an affair. 5. It shows that one's lot in life does not define who they are. 6. It completely dispels the myth of the grass is greener. 7. The AP, WW and BH are not portrayed as unattractive people. 8. It shows that the damage we do to ourselves, is the worst of all. If you have never seen this movie I highly recommend it. I find myself totally relating to the BH and the hired help. I never saw my marriage going down in flames and always try to keep my drama to a minimum. I could see my husband struggling the same way the WW was struggling, but would never in a million years thought he was capable of an affair. The movie is an oldie but a goodie - a tear jerker that exemplifies how painful it was for a MM to have knowledge of their significant other having sexual relations with another person, even if it was for one night and agreed upon, in exchange for a large sum of money. The money became a non-issue after the fact and their marriage fell apart. The thoughts that were associated with that night ripped the couple apart. At the end of the movie, they find their way back to one another. It's probably one you have all heard of .. Indecent Proposal. There are other films that I would recommend: "Closer, Malice, Double Jeapordy, Clay Pigeons, Masquerade, Derailed."
NotCamelot Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 Unfaithful is a movie I told my fWH not to watch as it would trigger HIM! Happy marriage, but she feels ignored, bored, and out of sorts.....and crashes into a lover.... Yeah, I think it rings true. Watch together at your own risk. That's pretty much it. And I think it is how a lot of affairs happen......from what I've read.
HotRod1963 Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Take This Waltz The movie is VERY realistic in its portrayal of an affair. The movie basically shows a woman starting an emotional affair, leaves her husband and a stable married life for what she “thought” was missing in her life. The new relationship with the other man starts out with passion, with red-hot scorched earth sex and excitement but after time passes the relationship cooled and shine of the new relationship started to fade putting her right back to her old lifestyle except with a man she did not love. You will know this because she wanted to get back with her husband; but he didn’t want her back he moved on. Be WARNED, like I said this is a very realistic portrayal of an affair. That means it is full of TRIGGERS.
SmokeRat Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Unfaithful is a movie I told my fWH not to watch as it would trigger HIM! Happy marriage, but she feels ignored, bored, and out of sorts.....and crashes into a lover.... Yeah, I think it rings true. Watch together at your own risk. You know what I get from this: ignored = selfish bored = selfish out of sorts = selfish That's all it is. But on the topics of movies, Silver Linings Playbook. The movie gives no reason for his wife's affair, she's a teacher, and is having an affair with a teacher. My STBXW, teacher and her lover is a teacher. Oh how she regretted taking me to that film. 2
Spark1111 Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 You know what I get from this: ignored = selfish bored = selfish out of sorts = selfish That's all it is. But on the topics of movies, Silver Linings Playbook. The movie gives no reason for his wife's affair, she's a teacher, and is having an affair with a teacher. My STBXW, teacher and her lover is a teacher. Oh how she regretted taking me to that film. Well the end of Unfaithful turns out to be the typical BH fantasy.....Hope that doesn't ruin it for you Smokie. Critics really liked it.
SmokeRat Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Yea I know the movie, seen it a few times. I'd love to cave in the OM's head with a Halligan Tool, because a snow globe just isn't my style. I think there should be law where you can challange the OM/OW to Gladiator style death match. There are a few BS's here on LS, that I would pay top dollar to watch smack the **** out of their WS's affair partners. Now that would make an awesome movie. 1
Spark1111 Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Yea I know the movie, seen it a few times. I'd love to cave in the OM's head with a Halligan Tool, because a snow globe just isn't my style. I think there should be law where you can challange the OM/OW to Gladiator style death match. There are a few BS's here on LS, that I would pay top dollar to watch smack the **** out of their WS's affair partners. Now that would make an awesome movie. See? I knew it would appeal to you!
Jenn.Smith Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 I like that in "he's just not that into you". The only couple who don't end up happy is the one engaging in an affair. Daniel Deronda is a period piece based on a novel. The theme is not infedelity but you can see the life of an OW that is destroyed. Specially in a time when infedlity among men was accepted. This woman left her reputation behind and a son. Had other children and was shunned from society. All because she "loved" a man who was not her husband. And who is a sick sick puppy. I actually don't know if I have seen any movies that Condone cheating. Lots of tv shows have episodes that down play it or what not.
Act Two Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Not a movie but Mad Men is one of my favorite shows - Don Draper's cheating is beyond cringe-worthy though. Does anyone else watch it? I thought he redeemed himself with Megan but he's cheating again this season!!
Spotme Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Not a movie, but I've seen ads on tv for a new show called Mistresses. The ads all show hot steamy clothes being ripped off scenes with just a snippet of one woman showing some apparent guilt for having just cheated. Blargh. I get upset every time I see the commercial. 1
krazikat Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Not a movie, but I've seen ads on tv for a new show called Mistresses. The ads all show hot steamy clothes being ripped off scenes with just a snippet of one woman showing some apparent guilt for having just cheated. Blargh. I get upset every time I see the commercial. I saw that too! Did you catch the "You cant help who you fall in love with" tagline, or something along those lines. Sheesh. Scandal also has a focus on an affair...but as of season finale it was not a happy situation.
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