Author bluegreen Posted May 26, 2013 Author Share Posted May 26, 2013 But its a bitch when you start craving hearing them again and wondering do they think of u miss you or not. Link to post Share on other sites
umirano Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 But its a bitch when you start craving hearing them again and wondering do they think of u miss you or not. I think I know what you mean. I just asked myself, would I mind if my ex suffers from this now or later? I'm not sure. There definitely is some anger and frustration, longing for revenge. Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 am not gonna be used as crutch while he gets over me or nurture him into being able for next victim while I stand and watch. He shared good times he is gonna have to share his part of pain to That is why I refused to have any further contact with my ex. He didn't want to be seen as the Bad Guy. I knew he'd use me to heal and be ready for the next one. The only way I'd ever rekindle a friendship is if I were happily married to someone much better so I could say, "I want to thank you for dumping me. Otherwise I wouldn't have met my wonderful husband!" Link to post Share on other sites
Author bluegreen Posted May 26, 2013 Author Share Posted May 26, 2013 That is why I refused to have any further contact with my ex. He didn't want to be seen as the Bad Guy. I knew he'd use me to heal and be ready for the next one. The only way I'd ever rekindle a friendship is if I were happily married to someone much better so I could say, "I want to thank you for dumping me. Otherwise I wouldn't have met my wonderful husband!" Could not have said this better myself Link to post Share on other sites
NeverADullMoment Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 I read that every 8 couple today has met on internet but seems every 3 of those break up. Sooner or later the damned Long Distance thing severs ties, makes us doubt, cool of, cheat or get cheated on, and if none above then its all back to point A Long Distance two words that's it. Then comes the worst yes there is worst yet : Lets stay friends part if there is still love could anything sound more degrading and insulting ? Would you ever accept this proposal or say : show it up yours ... preserve whatever pride and dignity you have left and leave not to look back ? Question is general but for those in this position every thing I ever heard read about or know says say NO to friendship if you want them back !!!! Well we didn't meet on the internet, but we've had MORE than our share of challenges and separations over the years! If he wanted to break it off with me and said he just wanted to be friends...well honestly I wouldn't be able to do that. I've never loved a man like I have this one and I would be absolutely devastated and could not watch him move on with another woman. I'm not sure I would tell him "up yours"....usually I would say no that I have too much love and respect, but if he blindsided me I'm sure I'd be SOOOO angry and upset so who knows what I would say?? I don't really want to visualize that kind of stuff anyway because I feel like it serves no good purpose. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bluegreen Posted May 26, 2013 Author Share Posted May 26, 2013 Up yours showed a lot of attention well ladies take it figuratively speaking it does not have to be meant like that unless it does. Hope you get the difference ... Link to post Share on other sites
Solstice_1979 Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 I just went thru this recently...but because of the circumstances..which he apologized for...I decided not to remain friends...I honestly still care about him..but what he did hurt me so much that I had no desire to talk to him...who knows what will happen in the future...but I know that if I were to see him now I might say something I'll regret. Link to post Share on other sites
amkxoxo Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 I have had this conversation with my guy and it pulled at my heart strings. We were talking about our future since he was leaving and we would have to do long distance. I wanted a relationship and the conversation was flowing from subject to subject until he threw out the dreaded "friend" word. He asked me if I could stand to be his friend. When I said "i don't know" because truthfully my head was screaming "No I like you too much", he seemed sad and told me "thats not the answer I was looking for". I ended up telling him "I would rather be your friend than be nothing". I cried that night thinking that I couldn't just be his friend. We went into the long distance relationship "dating" and it has all gone with the wind. He has called me less and less as the month has gone on, we have no future plans to see each other, and has only treats me with friend pleasantries. I sit here hurt and upset everyday thinking about him, missing him, and wishing things were different. Being friends sucks. I feel like when you go long distance you only have "being friends" because the physicalness of the relationship is gone. This is why many ldr's fail, because people can't just be friends. I'm currently trying to make mine work Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 He asked me if I could stand to be his friend. When I said "i don't know" because truthfully my head was screaming "No I like you too much", he seemed sad and told me "thats not the answer I was looking for". I think I didn't read this anywhere in your threads? With something as clear as him asking you to be friends, you shouldn't have deceived yourself into thinking you were dating him... And his reaction was unbelievable... He was even looking for a specific answer. I would have understood something like "This is not what I would have hoped for"... I feel like when you go long distance you only have "being friends" because the physicalness of the relationship is gone. This is why many ldr's fail, because people can't just be friends. I'm currently trying to make mine work I don't think so. That was your experience, but it came after he must have realized you were not the woman of his life. I don't think a man would easily switch to an only friends arrangement, if he's madly in love and there's a chance he's going to lose you. There are plenty of ways to keep the relationship alive sexually, and then meet up in person and 'catch up' for all the time away from each other. Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Some people are just unable to deal with LDR's, or just wouldn't feel fulfilled by it, which is fair enough, they're hardly a walk in the park. It's not true for everyone that couples become just friends when they become long distance, there are ways of keeping things going sexually, ways to keep the bond, but it takes two, needs commitment and effort from both people for it to work. I hope things will work out for you, sorry you are hurting I have had this conversation with my guy and it pulled at my heart strings. We were talking about our future since he was leaving and we would have to do long distance. I wanted a relationship and the conversation was flowing from subject to subject until he threw out the dreaded "friend" word. He asked me if I could stand to be his friend. When I said "i don't know" because truthfully my head was screaming "No I like you too much", he seemed sad and told me "thats not the answer I was looking for". I ended up telling him "I would rather be your friend than be nothing". I cried that night thinking that I couldn't just be his friend. We went into the long distance relationship "dating" and it has all gone with the wind. He has called me less and less as the month has gone on, we have no future plans to see each other, and has only treats me with friend pleasantries. I sit here hurt and upset everyday thinking about him, missing him, and wishing things were different. Being friends sucks. I feel like when you go long distance you only have "being friends" because the physicalness of the relationship is gone. This is why many ldr's fail, because people can't just be friends. I'm currently trying to make mine work Link to post Share on other sites
Author bluegreen Posted June 19, 2013 Author Share Posted June 19, 2013 HI HH did you go back with your guy ? Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 Not officially together, but very close, we can't seem to let go of each other just yet, seeing him next month. HI HH did you go back with your guy ? Link to post Share on other sites
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