Same <stuff>, different day

[Leigh 87]

Yes Leigh, it's TOUGH!

 

But going through something TOUGH MAKES YOU TOUGHER!

 

Now work those NC muscles! Instead of those NC-typing muscles!

 

HUP-2-3-4 GET YOUR AS* TO THE PHONE STORE!

 

 

 

Yes it is tough. Thanks. Those are the sort of things I want to hear. I am a very positive person, therefore it is quiet psycho and frightening when people bombard me with extremely negative things, such as " oh your screweddd girl your gunna get so hurt your never going to cut contact your gunna just keep talking until he soon replaces you"

 

I have never seen such negativity, and it disgusts me frankly. Look at all the people on here who do not go No Contact, and no one says this crapp to them.

 

In my real life, I tend to be around other positive and kind people like myself. We encourage people, and while we warn against the perils, we don't tell them that they are destined to FAIL.

 

I go to the phone store later, I have my Russian visa thing to attend to it is a freacking nightmare, then I am off to the mall to get some shoes on lay by. I will go into the phone shop then, as they have made a huge mistake with my bill (put my on the wrong plan, overcharged me 1400).

 

Fcking phones, Telstra is the WORST customer service for phones, they are fcking incompetent morons.

 

UGH. I was told by the manager that they put me on the wrong phone, and put me on "casual usage" which charges 300 for a frekin phone call.

 

The manager was really nice and sat down for an hour to fix it all for me....

 

He is like " okay, we have taken the extra charges away"

 

........

 

Now I am hit with w 1400 bill and they did not, in fact, take the bill away. IDIOTS.

 

Anyway, why I am there, I will get my number changed. Not that I like to deal with those morons.

[dreamingoftigers]

I encourage you to go NC with Andrew.

 

Now.

 

Right this second.

 

Nope, right now.

 

Very much encourage you to do so because every time you break NC in any way you show him that you want to be stuck to the past with him instead of showing yourself that the future will be better.

 

Look people should stop always assuming the worst case scenario and stop beating me up over occasionally texting him!

 

It is HARD for us both to go from being each others first loves and EXTREMELY attached, to just never talking or seeing each other again.

 

I have gotten it down to texts and talking, without caving into his requests to see me.

......................Which I think is very good since I HAD two small dogs who I love to death, as well as HIS two dogs who I love to death and cry over when I think about them and how much I miss them.

 

Now, I have managed to go from daily contact and an unhealthy co dependence on my ex, to NOT SEEING HIM or the dogs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I have made progress insofar as limiting contact.

 

I want encouragement, I DO NOT plan to continue texting and talking.

 

It has taken me a little longer than I had hoped for to cut contact, but I am only human and we all make mistakes.

 

The longer I go without him physically and emotionally in a relationship, the less hard it will be to just cut the chord.

 

.................

 

I find it disgusting how people assume the worst and say terribly nasty things to me like " oh well, yournot gunna cut contact EVER and he is just gunna go bang some chick very soon"

 

PLEASE. Your NASTY people if you assume the WORST every time.

 

I find it quiet disturbing that people pick the most negative outcome, and assume it will happen VERY SOON:sick:

 

.................

 

I am a very positive person, which is a large reason why a lot of people like me in my real life; I encourage people.

 

I would like ENCOURAGEMENT in the form of

 

" okay Leigh 87, that was a big step to go without seeing your dogs, the puppies and him. Now you should be ready to just cut the contact altogether soon. If you fail well, we told you so, but good luck Leigh 87 I hope you can do this"

 

.....................

 

So GIVE ME A BREAK, it is only human to reach out and text occasionally when you were once SO close to a person, it DOES NOT mean I have false hopes or that I DONT WANT to move on.

 

I KNOW I will go No Contact, because it is the only intelligent thing to do in this situation.

 

So PLEASE - let me to the right thing, and DO NOT bombard me with negative messages about how I am never going to do what is right and blablabla.:mad:

[Leigh 87]

And it continues... Leigh throws out a hook. We bite. Then she reels us in with defense, defense, defense. Again, I think she likes all this attention. Why else continue with this odd forum behavior?

 

Seriously, why don't you act instead of come here to LS to get a rise from us. I really think most everyone is tired of hearing about this, offering advice, and you saying how we don't know, we're wrong, stop bashing you, etc... I dare you. Stop posting. Or post something that actually makes healing sense and shows an effort to move forward. It's just the same old same old...

 

 

B O R I N G...

 

 

 

You sound like a pretty negative person....

 

I am not saying your all wrong - I am saying that while I know No Contact is the only way forward, it has taken me 3 weeks post break up to taper off the contact.

 

And of course your wrong about my ex, as I know the guy and know that he is not in a position where I meant so little to him that he will replace me in a matter of weeks:sick:

 

People on here assume the very worst in people, which is bizarre.

 

I come on here to tell people what I am doing, actually. So they know what has happened on my path to No Contact.

 

That is really all there is to it. I don't like negative comments because I HATE negative people.

 

I simply like to talk to people about my struggles with cutting him off, in the hope of hearing other stories and experiences about how hard it was for them, too.

 

No need to be an @sshole. I am a very nice person and do not deserve such negativity.

[dreamingoftigers]

Always get the name and employee number of anyone you give money to or make arrangements regarding billing.

 

I learned the hard way with ROGERS years ago.

 

Yes it is tough. Thanks. Those are the sort of things I want to hear. I am a very positive person, therefore it is quiet psycho and frightening when people bombard me with extremely negative things, such as " oh your screweddd girl your gunna get so hurt your never going to cut contact your gunna just keep talking until he soon replaces you"

 

I have never seen such negativity, and it disgusts me frankly. Look at all the people on here who do not go No Contact, and no one says this crapp to them.

 

In my real life, I tend to be around other positive and kind people like myself. We encourage people, and while we warn against the perils, we don't tell them that they are destined to FAIL.

 

I go to the phone store later, I have my Russian visa thing to attend to it is a freacking nightmare, then I am off to the mall to get some shoes on lay by. I will go into the phone shop then, as they have made a huge mistake with my bill (put my on the wrong plan, overcharged me 1400).

 

Fcking phones, Telstra is the WORST customer service for phones, they are fcking incompetent morons.

 

UGH. I was told by the manager that they put me on the wrong phone, and put me on "casual usage" which charges 300 for a frekin phone call.

 

The manager was really nice and sat down for an hour to fix it all for me....

 

He is like " okay, we have taken the extra charges away"

 

........

 

Now I am hit with w 1400 bill and they did not, in fact, take the bill away. IDIOTS.

 

Anyway, why I am there, I will get my number changed. Not that I like to deal with those morons.

[mtnbiker3000]

I come on here to tell people what I am doing, actually. So they know what has happened on my path to No Contact.

 

No. This is not why you come here. I think it is closer to one of these:

 

1. You want people to tell you 'It's OK. It'll be alright. You're doing the right thing. Keep doing what you are doing and all will be good'.

2. You are trying to convince us/yourself of some weird alternate reality that only exists in your mind. Not Andrews or anyone elses.

3. You like to argue/debate.

4. You like attention from the LS forum.

5. Enter any other weird, unhealthy behavior here ________________.

 

And, there is no "path to No Contact". There is a lot of excuses to not do it, which is what you are doing...

[Leigh 87]

Skid - See your assuming that the relationship was not based on love, that he never loved me, and that he would not be able to have done the immature young hooker and threesome thing with a girl he actually liked enough.

I believe that some men have the capacity to be in love and see hookers. Sorry, that is my belief on men.

Your assuming that this is just some light and meaningless relationship cos we are in our 20's. Wrong.

I do not believe that he was not in love with me, and did not really like me all that much at all.

We had serious and loving relationship, where he loved me in the best way HE could love a women.

 

 

I am not going to sit here and believe that yes, he was never into me, he never loved me, and he only had me around cos he liked having me look after him and he enjoyed my company.

 

I will never believe I was a women he used for sex and company.

 

We had a real relationship where he loved me very much.

 

Not enough in the end, evidentially, but it was not some insignificant, small relationship where he had VERY LITTLE feelings towards me.

 

I have read his journals, I have been around guys before, and I know when a person genuinely does love you in the best way THEY can love a women.

 

..............................................

 

Sorry but I do not think you know what he thinks or what our relationship was like.

[Leigh 87]

No. This is not why you come here. I think it is closer to one of these:

 

1. You want people to tell you 'It's OK. It'll be alright. You're doing the right thing. Keep doing what you are doing and all will be good'.

2. You are trying to convince us/yourself of some weird alternate reality that only exists in your mind. Not Andrews or anyone elses.

3. You like to argue/debate.

4. You like attention from the LS forum.

5. Enter any other weird, unhealthy behavior here ________________.

 

And, there is no "path to No Contact". There is a lot of excuses to not do it, which is what you are doing...

 

 

 

You don't know me.

 

I am here to get encouragement to cut contact with a person who I find it hard to just cut out.

 

I hate debating.

 

I argue because people tell me I meant nothing to him and he never loved me. It is just so far from the truth that is irritates me.

 

It is also insulting that people think I don't have a clue how a man that lived with me really thought about me, when I know him very well and I was the closest person to him, that knows him better than anyone.

[Leigh 87]

And a young and childish relationship can feelings involved that are just as strong as a more adult and mature relationship.

 

Your extremely condescending. We know what real love is, even though we were young and immature when we got together. We loved each other as much we loved our own parents for christs sake.

 

We both wanted to try threesomes and live a little before settling down with the one person for LIFE; what is so wrong with wanting to be young and fulfil your list of things you wanted to tick off before settling down?

 

No need to be nasty or to undermine our relationship just because we were not ready to settle down the minute we met.

 

In the end, he was too mature for a long term and committed adult relationship. I do not think it was because he never loved me much, or at all.

 

Sorry, it nasty of you to tell me that I meant very little to him and that he never even loved me.

The way my ex was, I highly doubt he would have met any women and suddenly changed right away.

 

Lastly - you will never convince me otherwise that all men that are in love, are not capable of seeing hookers. Sorry, but I believe that some men, no matter how in love they are, are able to have meaningless sex.

 

I will not be dating men like my ex that do this in the future, but I do not think he did it because he did not love me.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Look people should stop always assuming the worst case scenario and stop beating me up over occasionally texting him!

 

OK! And, please stop typing about NC. Okay? NC means you're not contacting him. You won't stop contacting him; he'll probably change his phone number before you stop.

 

It is HARD for us both to go from being each others first loves and EXTREMELY attached, to just never talking or seeing each other again.

 

So you think you are somehow exempt from doing things that are "hard"? Why? Whether it's "hard" or not, if it's what needs to be done, that's the way it is.

 

"Do or do not, there is no try." (Yoda) You are in the "do not" category.

 

That's really fine. You are calling, texting and talking to him. That's what you're doing. It has nothing to do with no contact though. Just like laying on the couch eating cookies and watching TV all day has nothing to do with living a healthy lifestyle, even if one hopes or plans to do that one day. Some day.

 

This has nothing to do with "assuming the worst," being "nasty," or any of that. It's just you doing what you do and not accepting any of the clearly predictable results.

[Leigh 87]

And I think I will believe the people around me in my real life who all think I am kind, generous, and just all around nice women.

I think my family and friends who are around me a lot have a better idea of who I am than some strangers.

I am extremely nice, I am very altruistic, and I give my time and energy to people in a way that you probably don't in real life.

 

 

I protest to advice from people, not because I am "nasty", but because some people on here assume that the relationship was not serious, and that he never loved me and just had me around for the hell of it.

 

 

I find it INCREDIBLY nasty of you and others to tell me my ex never loved me or cared about me, when I am going through the most painful time in my life.

All you can say is how little he cared for me and how insignificant the relationship was TO HIM.

 

I am going through the most painful thing I Have yet to experience, and you are just telling me ": yeah he never gave a craopp about you, and your pisweak for not going no contact"

 

Your the @ssholes NOT me.

 

When a person is going through a terrible time, as I am, the normal thing to do would be to support me and care that me, a fellow human, is going through pain.

[Leigh 87]

OK! And, please stop typing about NC. Okay? NC means you're not contacting him. You won't stop contacting him; he'll probably change his phone number before you stop.

 

 

 

So you think you are somehow exempt from doing things that are "hard"? Why? Whether it's "hard" or not, if it's what needs to be done, that's the way it is.

 

"Do or do not, there is no try." (Yoda) You are in the "do not" category.

 

That's really fine. You are calling, texting and talking to him. That's what you're doing. It has nothing to do with no contact though. Just like laying on the couch eating cookies and watching TV all day has nothing to do with living a healthy lifestyle, even if one hopes or plans to do that one day. Some day.

 

This has nothing to do with "assuming the worst," being "nasty," or any of that. It's just you doing what you do and not accepting any of the clearly predictable results.

 

 

 

 

 

HE IS THE ONE WHO WANTS TO TALK.

 

He initiates talking.

 

I am not annoying him. He is the one who WANTS me around.

 

I am the one who hates talking to him and find it torturous that he does not want to be WITH me, yet still talk to me.

 

It is, in fact, the opposite scenario to the one you have in your head! He is not the one who will change the number. He is the one who wants to talk to me.

 

He gets something from it, I do not. He is able to talk because he just wants the comfort of talking to me while he moves on, where as I feel like being punched in the gut every time he talks to me and says he loves me, yet does not want to be with me.

 

Trust me on this one. I will be the one putting and end to it.

[Leigh 87]

I am about to go No Contact. I never said I was doing it, clearly.

 

I Am going to finally burst and tell him how much it hurts to talk to him.

 

I know for a fact that he cares enough about me to accept that, after trying to keep in contact, it is really upsetting me a great deal.

 

I am sure he will accept this.

 

I have tried to text and talk because it comforted me initially, however; now it only upsets me after a few minutes of talking. Because he does not want to be with me.

[William]

This one had a good run. Time to call it done. Thanks for your participation.