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Will I ever earn my bf's parents trust back?


SeasideShells

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SeasideShells

This was about 5 months ago and both of us were drunk at the moment. I don't recall what exactly we were arguing about nor how it all started. I backhanded and shook him. I apologized the following day as this is really off my character.

 

But we've been dating for 3 years and this is the only single time I've ever done that. I think someone in the family saw it because his parents somehow found out about it. The father now ignores me and last time I tried to stop for a surprise visit, he just told ''He's not here'' and closed the door quickly. The mother is the one that hates me the most; she has called me nothing but nasty names and states how she don't ever forget it.

 

Is there a way I can earn their trust back. I'm sorry about what I did. I love their son and haven't drank again ever since.

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melodicintention

Woo, well that's a tough one. I can understand their disposition. You do sound genuinely regretful though. If you were married I would suggest counseling of some sort. I don't know if professional counselling is appropriate for your situation, but I don't really know how to soften them up without a 3rd party to smooth things over.

 

Maybe show them some way that you are making an effort. You claim you haven't drank. So why not go to AA? Then you can show them that you are making a change by attending the meetings. Invite them to go with you. You may not be an alcoholic, but you did engage in bad behavior when drinking so this might be an appropriate step to at least show them you are making a change. It's almost like stating publicly that you have a problem and are trying to fix it. Actions speak louder than words.

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  • 3 weeks later...
MercuryMorrison1

You might be able to over time. But it will take time.

Parents generally don't like it when people assault their children regardless of what age their child actually is.

 

I speculate the real challenge will be earning his mothers trust back. This is an endeavor that most likely will take years of work on your behalf. I'm sorry to come off so gloomy, but I am just trying to be real here.

 

It can be done most likely, but it will take a conscious effort on your behalf.

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SeasideShells
I would certainly hope not, once an abuser always an abuser.
Are you saying I'm forever to be an abuser and have no chance of changing?

 

Talk about being negative. I was overly passed out and that's not my normal character. 3 years into the relationship and because of one slip it should be over???

 

I haven't drank since then. That should tell you something. At least I'm putting all the effort to fix what I did wrong.

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