How to Get Our Spark Back...Gorgeous wife and I dont want sex? Whats wrong with me

[moodoo]

I am married to my dream woman, a different woman,perfect in every way. She has a great heart, an awesome personality, and makes a ton of money, more than I do. The issue we're having is MY SEX DRIVE IS GONE. Yes, me, married to a famous webcam girl that many men pay tons of money to fantasize about it and I don't even want sex anymore and recently she and I had a talk and we agreed its not normal. She's very supportive and doesn't want to leave me but she wants us to fix our problem

 

I think my issue stems from "getting away from work". I handle all the updates to her website, I help her out with ideas during her show, I film vids with her everyday and I just feel like maybe somehow seeing her naked just doesnt turn me on anymore? I spend 40-50 hrs a week with her naked on cam,looking at the pics and vids we shoot editing them. Could that be it? I mean if i told my friends I didn't want sex from my wife they would laugh at me bc they all want her and I'd sound gay. When we first began dating 2.5 years ago we couldn't stop having sex and now we've literally had sex like 3 times this year. She plays with toys alot for work so I figure she has her fix and I do masturbate so I'm not asexual or anything but for some reason I just never get the urge with her...

 

Another issue is maybe we spend too much time together? Since we both work from home, we picked up and left all our friends behind and moved to live oceanfront 2000 miles away from everyone. So now we're together every second of everyday, we get along great so its not a big deal, but we pretty much haven't made any friends out here bc we work from home and the building we live in is mostly vacation properties so theres not really any locals our age here like we thought we'd meet.

 

I make enough to support us both but I cant ask her to walk away from a $200,000+ a year job that she loves. I mean I know she's not gonna do this forever bc shes 30 now, but I think her job may be the strain? The problem is she doesn't even have a college degree and could never make that type of money in the real world with a high school degree

 

 

please help me, like i said,we love each other very much and we have so much fun together, we do everything together and rarely fight, it sickens some of our friends how happy we are and the talk we had was great, she said she didn't want to leave over this issue and that we should fix this somehow. Maybe couples therapy? I just don't like therapy so I thought maybe someone here could help us out?

 

Thank you

Edited May 31, 2013 by moodoo

[Nyla]

I am married to my dream woman, a different woman,perfect in every way. She has a great heart, an awesome personality, and makes a ton of money, more than I do. The issue we're having is MY SEX DRIVE IS GONE. Yes, me, married to a famous webcam girl that many men pay tons of money to fantasize about it and I don't even want sex anymore and recently she and I had a talk and we agreed its not normal. She's very supportive and doesn't want to leave me but she wants us to fix our problem

 

I think my issue stems from "getting away from work". I handle all the updates to her website, I help her out with ideas during her show, I film vids with her everyday and I just feel like maybe somehow seeing her naked just doesnt turn me on anymore? I spend 40-50 hrs a week with her naked on cam,looking at the pics and vids we shoot editing them. Could that be it? I mean if i told my friends I didn't want sex from my wife they would laugh at me bc they all want her and I'd sound gay. When we first began dating 2.5 years ago we couldn't stop having sex and now we've literally had sex like 3 times this year. She plays with toys alot for work so I figure she has her fix and I do masturbate so I'm not asexual or anything but for some reason I just never get the urge with her...

 

Another issue is maybe we spend too much time together? Since we both work from home, we picked up and left all our friends behind and moved to live oceanfront 2000 miles away from everyone. So now we're together every second of everyday, we get along great so its not a big deal, but we pretty much haven't made any friends out here bc we work from home and the building we live in is mostly vacation properties so theres not really any locals our age here like we thought we'd meet.

 

I make enough to support us both but I cant ask her to walk away from a $200,000+ a year job that she loves. I mean I know she's not gonna do this forever bc shes 30 now, but I think her job may be the strain? The problem is she doesn't even have a college degree and could never make that type of money in the real world with a high school degree

 

 

please help me, like i said,we love each other very much and we have so much fun together, we do everything together and rarely fight, it sickens some of our friends how happy we are and the talk we had was great, she said she didn't want to leave over this issue and that we should fix this somehow. Maybe couples therapy? I just don't like therapy so I thought maybe someone here could help us out?

 

Thank you

 

It is perfectly natural for you not to want your wife doing sex work.When I was younger, I was a phone sex operator as well as a receptionist an escort agency. There is no way my husband would tolerate me doing that kind of work again. I am not to speak to any other man erotically except him.

 

What made you decide to marry a sex worker with no kind of education or other skills? :confused:This should have been agreed upon before marriage. I know the money must be wonderful for your wife, but she needs to realize that as a married woman, sex work is just not appropriate.

 

If you make enough money to support both of you, offer to send your wife to school. It might be the best thing to happen to her. She obviously has some business acumen if she is able to rake in all that money as a webcam girl.

 

Nobody likes therapy as it is grueling and difficult. However, the rewards are well worth it.

[Mr. Lucky]

I make enough to support us both but I cant ask her to walk away from a $200,000+ a year job that she loves.

I'm confused, is your employment outside your production of her show? If not, "I make enough to support us both" is a bit disingenuous as, were her show to stop, so would your income.

but I think her job may be the strain?

My thought when I read the first paragraph of your post. Your id and ego have a problem with her line of work and they've appointed your penis as their spokesman. Have you discussed your specific discomfort with her ???

 

Mr. Lucky

[moodoo]

When I met her she was a dancer at my best friends club. She was different from the other girls, she was the only non-hooker it was so funny my friend would always tell me how him and the other managers thought she was a undercover cop bc she never went upstairs with men like the other girls.

 

She's always been in the "Sex" business she just hated being a dancer and when she tried webcamming it was just instant profit and then I helped her expand her business into a personal website, clip stores, etc but we dont need her money as I own my own business and make plenty but it is more than nice having all that extra money coming into our savings.

 

I just don't get whats wrong with me and why I never feel like having sex. I mean I masturbate a few times a week so its not like im not sexual but for some reason i just dont feel like having sex with one of the worlds most famous webcam girls, its just really awkward and I just can't grasp what the hell is wrong with me?

 

Is it that im mentally damaged from her satisfying all these other men over the internet? bc im very happy for her that shes able to save up all kinds of money at her age and I know shed be miserable going back and working at the mall for minimum wage like she did 5 years ago before she ever started stripping.

[hppr]

This is a long shot but have you had your testosterone checked? If it's tailing off you'll be depressed, tired, no energy, not really wanna screw, jerk off every now and then (if at all).

[Mr. Lucky]

I mean I masturbate a few times a week so its not like im not sexual but for some reason i just dont feel like having sex with one of the worlds most famous webcam girls

You're not going to get the answer here. Have you talked to a counselor or therapist?

 

Mr. Lucky

[johan]

Being hot isn't always a turn on. It just means she's nice to look at and is maybe less flawed. There is no chemistry in that. It sort of just makes getting her an achievement. I get way more turned on by cute girls who have certain physical traits along with interesting personalities.

 

I'm not saying your woman isn't interesting or cute, but more that in general beauty may catch your eye, but it takes something else to turn you on. Maybe you should focus there.

Edited June 1, 2013 by johan