Simpleoldschool Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 so, i've decided to enter into a relationship without holding to my "red flag" radar. I met a women, or should i say this women showed interest in me. She was a bombshell. Im used to, or should i say having women who are absolute tens by anyones description. The women i've been with gain attention everywhere i go. woopie as if that wasnt a burden. Anyways, there is this new women. remarkably beautifull. everyone i know agrees. however i havent told them shes a single mother. Due to the last expierience i had, which was absolutely negative i dont know exactly if i should write her off because she seems to have a heart of Gold. However single mothers know how to catch a mouse with some good old fashioned cheese. I already told her, sex will not be part of this relationship for quite some time. QUITE SOME TIME. so my emotions arent convaluted within what i can understand about her as a good choice or bad choice. i am not playing that game because that can have consequences to a higher degree. my problems are the generic problems of dating a single mother. The complex she has the act to replace a father lost that she got rid of displacing responsibility me becoming the relationship target, hung up on a wall awaiting darts. I made a conscious decision to stay away from single mothers but apparently she seems to have her head on her shoulders and having previous expierience im drilling some questions. not to leave too many holes but enough in retrospect to gain insight upon inquiry. dating a single mom, or regularly you become the LAST OPTION amongst all other priorities. she trys to rail you in, has you develope a relationship with the child ( children have an ache for a father or their blood father which is an assload of problems all on its own) and then once she does, all that attention is gone. she evaluates the sense of your moral psychology(canidate for her trap) to see if you'll stick around. its a guilt scheme. the man develops a relationship with the child which is primarily what keeps him around. the sense of family. my problems are as such. even though i have dated models and married one, this one tips the scale on beauty and from what i can tell heart. i think i should let this relationship be a mild pursuit where i evaluate changes in her behaviour over a six month period. from a male perspective, are their good single mothers or am i just opening the door to the railroad straight into a hellish oblivion. Im trying to persuade myself along with ascertain opinions to give great clarity. single mothers are professional actress', have no sense of fault and beilieve everyone owes them something. kids are relatively uncared for. I dont care if any of you beilieve im just illiterating some super bs. There is alot of psychology and truth in what happens when dating single mothers that pertains to me putting my nose on a grindstone trying to breath against blood and rock. im not scared but i actually want to see if this single mom stuff is mumbo jumbo and they all dont fall into this category or if it all is really just her sense of survival mode because of her bad choice. i am not going to be anyones PAWN EVER AGAIN. ever. not EVER. what red flags can i look out for other than that she has a child already out of wedlock. it seems like im asking someone how to enter a bee-hive without being stung once. i wonder if this is all a facilitated self-real fear that isnt real or if there is a projected dillemma the harder i try to dive into this. BTW kind of laughable. three days and she says she loves me. that kind of made things awkward. she is kind. should i further investigate elements of this relationship to see if its an act or just hit the road? either way i dont know whats going to happen until i wake up and realize what choices i made, made my lifes course. anyone have any opinions? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Simpleoldschool Posted June 3, 2013 Author Share Posted June 3, 2013 im trying to understand whether my fear is a hypnotic implant from a previous expierience or to be regarded as on an instinctual basis a reason to run and fast. i want to know if all single moms should come with a hazard warning. i want to know what others expieriences can contribute to me staying away. if i should. success stories and the grimmacing truth about how someone survived through such an ordeal. something. Link to post Share on other sites
WreckedDan Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 Every one is different SOS, my mom was a single mom until I was 13 my wife is a single mom... so are they freakin crazy, no and yes... I would guess that you would want to be assured that she was past most of her healing process... My 2© Dan Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 BTW kind of laughable. three days and she says she loves me. Im used to, or should i say having women who are absolute tens by anyones description. The women i've been with gain attention everywhere i go. You'll be perfect for each other... Mr. Lucky 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Caldespair Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 Stay away! I could not handle an I love you on 3rd date. She's prob a great person but needy and I'm learning that needy is a relationship killed. You prob feel obligated to her already. If u don't text or call the get upset. Just my 2 cents and I wrote about today on my post today. Good luck.! Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 (edited) you have pointed out all the bad things that you feel with dating a single mother......you are extremely conflicted with circumstances surrounding a child out of wedlock....which is not all single mothers btw...some are separated widowed divorced abandoned...............so don't date a single mother..you honestly dont sound happy with that ...stick to what you can handle which is your women who are tens or model capable and attract attention of others.......if you are happy dating those women....do what makes you happy....you have a right to be happy..an dif you attract them...date them ...not single mothers who you feel negative about..deb Edited June 3, 2013 by todreaminblue 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GuyInLimbo Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 Well, this one is too clingy. This "I love you" BS after 3 dats is a major red flag to me. You seem to have a firm belief in all the stereotypes of single moms. You need to stop being so black & white. I have a hard time believing they are all the same. Also, you should hold firm on a rule about meeting the kids. DO NOT meet them until you have been involved with the kids for at least a year. Period. No exceptions. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 WAIT, what? She loves you after 3 days? The problem is not her being a single mother, the problem is her being a wack job.....Beautiful or not. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PoopHappens Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Shallow... Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts