Yourenogood Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 About 4 years ago, I met this guy lets call him Zac He definitely liked me and we literally spoke every night for hours, and not get bored of each other and never stopped laughing and never once did the conversation die out. Anyway this continued for about 2 and half years every single night. One night his best friend texts me and asks me how I feel about Zac and I told him basically what I just told you guys up there I knew he liked me because his best friend told me but I told his friend that right now he was a great friend, emphasis on the friend. About 2 months after that he started going out with this girl which is his first girlfriend, of course when this happened I got totally jealous like it would hurt me everyone I saw them together and I saw them every single day at school. I could deal with them going out 1 or 2 months every day hoping they would break up but unfortunately 1 and half years have passed and they are still together. Like people say, time heals all and we barely speak anymore and only say hello when we pass eachother. Lately he's been looking at me differently, and he came up to me at lunch and instead of just saying hello we literally spend the whole 40 minutes of lunch together and it flew by. I would of found this normal but the whole time he was looking at me in the eyes never once leaving my face, he had a really serious look in his eyes like then and there he was going to kiss me. It was the weirdest thing I had to keep looking away so it didn't look like we were intensely staring into each others eyes! Okay now back to my dilemma I try to move on, I really try but hes perfect for me, i would marry him in a heartbeat and all my thoughts go back to him, if I'm with somebody else I hope he's around so he can see and get jealous I don't know what's wrong with me but I know I will never tell him how I feel while he still have a girlfriend because I don't want to be a homewrecking bitch but do you guys think he's worth waiting for or should I let time heal?? Link to post Share on other sites
will1988 Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 So let me get this straight.... This guy had a major crush on you for over two years, but you put him deep in the entrenchments of the friendzone? He was shy or nervous and had his friend ask you if you liked him, and you said NO. Then after listening to you blab on and on about your relationship problems and your life events for two years, he is fed up with waiting for you to like him back. He realizes that this is a one way street of emotion, so he starts to move on. Then he asks out another girl. A girl that didn't thrust him in to the friendzone. A girl that actually treats him more than a friend. A girl that shows interest in him, and by now probably loves him after a year and a half. Yet, now, because he isn't your little emotional punching bag / shrink, you now miss him. You now realize that you had feelings for him all along. You now realize you made a big mistake. But instead of moving on and licking your wounds and chalking this up to lesson learned, you want to come between him and his current girl friend? You want to ruin his current relationship because of your mistakes? why and how is this fare to him or this other girl? And to your other point, maybe he just misses being your friend... who knows. but if he didn't try to make a move I wouldn't give it too much thought. I think you missed the ship and it has set sail long ago. It is time for you to move on and cut your losses and realize that people have emtions too, emotions that are fluid and changing... for every action there will be a reaction. If a guy likes you but you end up rejecting him, don't expect him to wait around like a beat puppy, for you to change your mind! thats not how the heart works. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
LoverOfDance Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 So let me get this straight.... This guy had a major crush on you for over two years, but you put him deep in the entrenchments of the friendzone? He was shy or nervous and had his friend ask you if you liked him, and you said NO. Then after listening to you blab on and on about your relationship problems and your life events for two years, he is fed up with waiting for you to like him back. He realizes that this is a one way street of emotion, so he starts to move on. Then he asks out another girl. A girl that didn't thrust him in to the friendzone. A girl that actually treats him more than a friend. A girl that shows interest in him, and by now probably loves him after a year and a half. Yet, now, because he isn't your little emotional punching bag / shrink, you now miss him. You now realize that you had feelings for him all along. You now realize you made a big mistake. But instead of moving on and licking your wounds and chalking this up to lesson learned, you want to come between him and his current girl friend? You want to ruin his current relationship because of your mistakes? why and how is this fare to him or this other girl? And to your other point, maybe he just misses being your friend... who knows. but if he didn't try to make a move I wouldn't give it too much thought. I think you missed the ship and it has set sail long ago. It is time for you to move on and cut your losses and realize that people have emtions too, emotions that are fluid and changing... for every action there will be a reaction. If a guy likes you but you end up rejecting him, don't expect him to wait around like a beat puppy, for you to change your mind! thats not how the heart works. Sorry but I just needed to say this - that is exactly how the heart works. The heart will tell u to wait 4ever if it can be done but the brain will tell u to move on. OP - Yes OP, u missed your chance. Why u told his friend he was nothing but a friend to u, I don't know but u made a big mistake. There's really nothing u can do now but move on with your life. I wouldn't advise u to wait 4 him to break up with her because I don't think that is ever a good idea. U should never put your life on hold 4 anyone. The way I see it, u have 2 options rht now - steal him or move on. As a very morally grounded girl, I wld advise u to let him go. U made a bad decision but that's life. Try to accept it and move on. If he's yours he'll come back. BUT and a very big BUT, if he's not, do not wait. Move on. You'll be fine. Link to post Share on other sites
LonelyHero Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 I am kind of jealous of your story because it is so innocent. Your options are 2 as others mentioned. 1) you move on , go out , it's summer time , if you are well shaped you can make boys what you want. There is not such thing as : "he is the one" . No he is not. There are so many who are going to give you so much experience. 2) Go and tell him whole the story. (when his friend came and asked you , you were afraid and so on.) He decides what to do. Come to you ( break up with his gf) , or not come to you) . The point is that YOU should be happy. Because as life has taught me , you should care about yourself and only yourself as it comes to relationships (parents are another story). If you will be happier do it, else leave it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Yourenogood Posted June 4, 2013 Author Share Posted June 4, 2013 I am kind of jealous of your story because it is so innocent. Your options are 2 as others mentioned. 1) you move on , go out , it's summer time , if you are well shaped you can make boys what you want. There is not such thing as : "he is the one" . No he is not. There are so many who are going to give you so much experience. 2) Go and tell him whole the story. (when his friend came and asked you , you were afraid and so on.) He decides what to do. Come to you ( break up with his gf) , or not come to you) . The point is that YOU should be happy. Because as life has taught me , you should care about yourself and only yourself as it comes to relationships (parents are another story). If you will be happier do it, else leave it. Haha I live in Australia, winter has just begun and believe me I have tried to move on so many times but my mind always goes back to him. Reading the comment on top of yours they are right I should just try to move on and let him be happy. I am so lost thanks for the advice though 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cutiepie1976 Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Lesson learned: It's counterproductive to play mind games and toy with someone's feelings. He has moved on. Consider it a learning experience and move on as well. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Shooting_Star Posted June 7, 2013 Share Posted June 7, 2013 As other people have said, you should just move on. If you're a happy, positive, optimistic person, people will love being around you and you'll find someone new. Try not to dwell too much on the past. From your post, you sound young (like high school young), and young love is always hard. You make mistakes, you learn from them (and you'll possibly make the same mistake more than once. Maybe not this one but others). And who knows? Maybe one day you'll see each other, both be single and decide to give things a chance again. Maybe its just not your time to be together. Life and love can be funny like that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted June 7, 2013 Share Posted June 7, 2013 I have a feeling you'd quickly get bored of him if you did have a chance with him. This doesn't sound like it's about him. This is about another girl taking something away from you, and you don't like it. So of course you want it back. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Yourenogood Posted June 27, 2013 Author Share Posted June 27, 2013 I have a feeling you'd quickly get bored of him if you did have a chance with him. This doesn't sound like it's about him. This is about another girl taking something away from you, and you don't like it. So of course you want it back. no, its not i fell for him way before they got together Link to post Share on other sites
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