Help!!! Gf Thinks Im Cheating But Im Really Not!!!

[KooterMaGooter]

First time poster.... ok so my gf checked my email and found an email from a random girl that said that i loved her and called her my everything. so my gf thinks i cheated on her but i didnt and i have evidence that i didnt do it and ive never met the girl in my life. she did all this research and finds out that ive been getting emails from teh girl since june. i recieved an email from the other girl explaining that it was only a practical joke that a friend was pulling on me and that she wasnt aware that my email address wasnt the email address of a guy she liked. the only problem is that i have a shaky reason why i have the girl in my profile, i have her in my profile cause i wanted to find out who she was and why she was sending me emails like that, but i forgot she was on my buddy list because i put her on a secondary buddy list that i dont use all the time and i went away for the whole summer. i practically lived with my gf all summer and spent no more than 15 days away from her. i found out that the girl lives no where near me and that it was a joke played on me by a friend i had from high school... what im basically asking is what should i do to get my gf to believe me and to stay with me...

[Merin]

Well to be honest, your story sounds more than a little questionable even to me and heck I don't know you.

 

So I'm going to put myself in your girlfriends shoes here for a minute and tell you why this story doesn't make sense..

 

To begin with you've said that you began getting emails from this girl in June.. and you wondered why she was sending them right? Well.. did you EVER email her back and ask her who she is? Why she was sending you email? Tell her you think she has mistaken your address for someone else? Wouldn't that be what most people would have done?

 

Let's say that you did in fact do that and asked her all of those questions I just presented.. did she ever respond? Did she ever tell you she had made a mistake? Or Tell you who she was and why she was emailing you? For real, since June and she NEVER told you why or who or what?

 

So regardless if she did or didn't give you any answers (if you in fact ever did ask) why didn't you just BLOCK her from emailing you altogether? You could've flagged her email address to be blocked from sending you anything.. and you didn't, why?

 

Well you said because you wanted to know who,what and why.. Well my question in your girlfriends shoes would be WHY? What difference did it or does it make who she is? IF you don't know her, and you've asked her who she is, told her she's got the wrong guy and she continued on with it.. then WHY didn't YOU block her?

 

So your girl finds the email and she's pissed.. (understandably) She does her own research and find out this has been going on since June, now she is really pissed.. now you say that this girl emails you again and says it was all a joke.. which is odd.. because right after that you said she WASN'T aware she had the wrong email address that she thought it was the address of some guy she likes?! Well how is that even possible? This was a joke right? So she didn't know who the joke was on? She thought she was emailing a guy she has an interest in? Well I guess that would clear up the fact that you NEVER emailed her back asking why in the heck she was emailing YOU to begin with right? Not to mention if she really believed she thought she was emailing a guy she DID have something going with.. what are you saying, that for almost 5 months she NEVER got any reply or response but was just a trooper about it all and gave the guy she thought she was emailing the benefit of the doubt that he would get back to her eventually?

 

This story isn't holding water...

 

IF this girl REALLY emailed you and told you she had made a mistake, then why didn't you forward that email to your girlfriend with the girls email address (that I'm sure is burned into your girlfriends mind so don't even think about goofing and trying to come up with a fake addy IF she didn't really email you this) then you would have had some harder proof that you weren't lying to her.

 

I don't know KootermaGooter.. to me, it sounds like you're trying to tell a story here and see if anyone here says "Yeeaahhh I can see how that would happen"

 

If you want to work it out with your girlfriend.. be honest. The rest is up to her.

 

Good Luck

[kellydontwanttasleep]

it all sounds a little shady

[KooterMaGooter]

well it was a joke the other girl was unaware of, she was misled by a guy i knew from high school. i didnt email her back cause i wasnt home for the whole summer except for 15 days tops where i had little time at home basically and would rush through my email deleting everything that i didnt know the sender. i forgot all about the girl basically because i was caught up in my summer and spending time with my gf... i wanted to find out who it was because thats jsut the way i am.... what im basically asking tho is how or what can i do to prove that im not cheating, i have already gotten the other girl to email my gf and explain the whole thing yet nothing has happened....what do i do to prove that i didnt cheat????

[Merin]

Originally posted by KooterMaGooter

well it was a joke the other girl was unaware of, she was misled by a guy i knew from high school. i didnt email her back cause i wasnt home for the whole summer except for 15 days tops where i had little time at home basically and would rush through my email deleting everything that i didnt know the sender. i forgot all about the girl basically because i was caught up in my summer and spending time with my gf... i wanted to find out who it was because thats jsut the way i am.... what im basically asking tho is how or what can i do to prove that im not cheating, i have already gotten the other girl to email my gf and explain the whole thing yet nothing has happened....what do i do to prove that i didnt cheat????

 

KootermaGooter, do you realize that this STILL doesn't make any logical sense?

 

Why would this girl continue faithfully sending emails IF she really believed she was emailing someone she had a relationship with? She emailed for almost 5 months.. and NEVER got ANY response.

 

Yet the email your girlfriend reads says how YOU'VE told this girl you love her and told her she is your everything.. wow, how did she get that from NO RESPONSE for 5 months!?

 

I bet your girlfriend isn't buying any of it.. and you know what, I can't say I blame her. Sorry....

[KooterMaGooter]

ok well it was never personalized it never said my name.... she never thought anything of it because the guy gave her excuses and said that he did get the emails. and the guy that did say all this stuff lives by her, keep in mind i dont live anywhere near this girl i live maybe 75 miles from her...the explaining email i recieved from the girl says:

 

" I am embarrassed by having to send this email but I understand that I was part of a practical joke gone too far. I was told that these email addresses were those of a friend of a guy I know, his name is alejandro louro, he knows ____ from his high school, at least that's what he told me. He gave me the email addresses and told me it was the addresses of his friend Mark Peterson. This explains the misunderstanding with the email address at ___.edu. I'm embarrassed to say that i have been sending messages to these addresses since June in understanding that these emails were going to there rightful recipients, but in reality they were not. i was told that the purpose of the joke was to annoy and see if i would have been emailed back or IMed by ___________, having found out i was only part of a practical joke I'm appalled and refuse to maintain contact with both alejandro and mark. The joke failed, I was never contact. I understand that there is much heart ache in this debacle. I understand that i sent an email stating:

"Hey baby. I just wanted to say how surprised I was to hear u say that I'm ur everything last night. I know that you always say you love me and that I mean alot to you and I am special but to here those words that I'm ur everything meant sooooo much. I can't wait for us to be together...maybe if ur gonna be really sweet to me today you'll e mail me back....ok well I'm gonna go.. I love you. Amanda"

this email was meant to be sent to mark not to _________. I was told that the email addresses were obtained from _________ AIM profile by alejandro. again I'm embarrassed and hope that things will work out. If there is any doubt I will give you some information about myself and the sn of alejandro:

name- Amanda

age- 18

Location- Trenton area (i doubt anyone knows where the town i actually live in is but its Hamilton Square)

School- Camden Community College (hopefully Texas A&M)"

 

i hope this clears up any cofusion from what i said before about my situation. but i spent my whole summer with my gf except for 15 days tops where i wasnt even in the country... i almost wish i did do it so i could admit to it and beg for forgiveness..... i lvoe her with all my heart and have been miserable for the past couple of days.... please help me

[GirlDown]

this sounds like bullsh*t to me.

 

if i were your girl, i would drop you for just being involved with this ridiculousness.

 

things like this don't happen without your knowledge.

 

sorry, dude. you got caught, and now you're looking for sympathy.

 

nice try, and better luck next time.

[SoleMate]

You know, there is a 0.1% chance you really are the innocent victim you claim to be. In that case, I do feel sorry for you.

 

MORAL of the story: If you receive dubious emails, block the sender's address at once.

 

Other MORAL: When you type your story up and post it on LS, everybody can see how flimsy it is. It'd be better to try to snow your gf with this after she has a few drinks in her and you're cuddling her and feeling her up. That will cloud her judgment.

[daGuy]

Well, I just stumbled upon this thread and have to say it's ridiculous.

Looking at the evidence you showed here I would instantly believe your story and I would have no doubt that you never had anything going with that girl.

Since I'm probably the only male here that replies to your problem I have to try to balance the whole view a little.

At first I have to say that it is natural to not delete the girls emails or block her because men are just curious. I would be curious who writes such emails to me so I would try to find out. And, grirls, don't tell me you wouldn't be!

Well, and for the other part. Your gf doesn't believe you even though you explained everything to her AND got the other girl to send her an email???

Man, there is something totally going wrong here. She wanted to dump you before and was just looking for an excuse!. That sounds harsh but I believe that's the way it is. Maybe there was something going on before and now she has a reason to leave you.

My advice: if she doesn't believe you, or doesn't want to believe you, let her go! She isn't worth it and will dump you at the next occasion!

[Fritz]

My advice: if she doesn't believe you, or doesn't want to believe you, let her go! She isn't worth it and will dump you at the next occasion!

 

I'm inclined to agree. While this story sounds rather fantastic and convoluted I have a few quandaries.

 

1. Why is she checking your email, invading your privacy? Did you give her permission? Did she see all the emails/IM you sent back asking about who this other gal is? (Or did you email this chick at all??) Did this so called friend playing a joke openly admit to it in person?

2. If you've been out of the country for two weeks and the rest with your gf I might see her worrying about the trip but...do you have a past history of this? Is she insecure?

3. If you're telling the truth and she can't/won't believe you there really isn't anything you can do but move on.