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Do you STILL think your "looks" are holding you back? (for the Struggling Fellas)

Imajerk17

By Imajerk17,
in General Relationship Discussion

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JuneJulySeptember

JuneJulySeptember

Posted
Posted
You're making practical suggestions for behaviors I don't engage in, that you merely assumed I did. So, it's irrelevant to me.

 

You see where I'm going with this though, right?

 

You read one of my posts of whining and negativity, and you're like "God. What a loser." I get it. It turns you off. It's bad. The whining and negativity. I'll try to change.

 

And your posts turn me off. Your attitude. I'm just being honest.

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Emilia

Emilia

Posted
Posted
Yes, sadly :laugh:

I was just dying to use the word 'treacle' on someone that understands it :D

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Xinreeki

Xinreeki

Posted
Posted
Yup and i cant blame him because finally getting a yes will give you confidence because it makes you think "wait there are girls out there who find me attractive maybe this isnt as impossible as i think" but before you get that one yes it seems like you are trying to split the f'in atom trying to attract women and that its never gonna happen..

 

As i said its not as if sd right up until he met the new girl started posting with a different attitude or anything it was the same sad negative person it was the results that got him confidence and he got results because he found a women who was physically attracted to him and/or isnt that shallow..

 

But, hypothetically, what if that girl turned around tomorrow and dumped him, saying -

 

"It was all a wind up, I never really fancied you at all. You suck. You're a loser and you're going to die alone"

 

**A completely hypothetical scenario of course, and I hope it never ever happens (as that would be truly tragic :()... **

 

But if it DID happen... (when he STILL harbors an internally negative attitude towards himself) then that rejection would hurt him a LOT MORE... than if he were to be internally confident and positive about future prospects... WITHOUT having to rely on EXTERNAL input to keep him sustained! :(

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Revolver

Revolver

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I do. There is one in my office. He does have a girlfriend currently but he is very shy so he is holding onto her. He is good looking, I see how women look at him in the pub. He is painfully shy however. I can think of 3 good looking shy men top of my head who struggle with women.

 

He has a GF tho, I don't see how he "struggles". Being shy is a killer for an unnactractive man, for this handsome guy you speak of(and pretty much all handsome men)it doesn't matter which is one of the things I've always said. I probably bet he didnt even approach her, what more than likely happened was she approached him and all he had to do was not F it up;)

 

Look I'm not saying confidence doesn't matter at all or looks are everything it's just that looks are the most important thing. When guys get rejected 98% of the time it's because the girl just wasnt physically attracted to him.

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JuneJulySeptember

JuneJulySeptember

Posted
Posted
Yes, sadly :laugh:

 

To be fair, the message of the original post wasn't conveyed well, if the intention was good. I agree with that. Imajerk is a good guy and he means well.

 

Why don't you start a thread telling unsuccessful guys exactly what they need to change (seriously)? You seem to be so adamant that they are trudging along a perpetual path to nowhere, so what is the path to enlightenment?

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Emilia

Emilia

Posted
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He has a GF tho, I don't see how he "struggles".

After years of struggle yes. I assume it will be the case for most of you as well

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ThaWholigan

ThaWholigan

Posted
Posted
To be fair, the message of the original post wasn't conveyed well, if the intention was good. I agree with that. Imajerk is a good guy and he means well.

 

Why don't you start a thread telling unsuccessful guys exactly what they need to change (seriously)? You seem to be so adamant that they are trudging along a perpetual path to nowhere, so what is the path to enlightenment?

 

I already have more than once - one of those threads is in my signature. You can find the others if you look at my thread history. Plenty of times I have explained it, even when I was struggling myself.

 

After years of struggle yes. I assume it will be the case for most of you as well

 

Agreed. People seem to forget that I struggled myself.

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Star Gazer

Star Gazer

Posted
Posted (edited)
You see where I'm going with this though, right?

 

You read one of my posts of whining and negativity, and you're like "God. What a loser." I get it. It turns you off. It's bad. The whining and negativity. I'll try to change.

 

And your posts turn me off. Your attitude. I'm just being honest.

 

Quote me where I had that reaction to your posts.

 

My attitude may turn you off, but I really don't care as my perspective and personality are working for me. Can you say the same about yours?

 

Also, you're not my target demo. ;) I don't care if negative men (you said you owned it) don't like me, because I don't like them. And, your advice, if followed, would attract negative men. No thanks!!

Edited by Star Gazer
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JuneJulySeptember

JuneJulySeptember

Posted
Posted
Quote me where I had that reaction to your posts.

 

My attitude may turn you off, but I really don't care as my perspective and personality are working for me. Can you say the same about yours?

 

Also, you're not my target demo. ;) I don't care if negative men (you said you owned it) don't like me, because I don't like them. And, your advice, if followed, would attract negative men. No thanks!!

 

Nope. That's why I'm going to change. ;)

 

If yours is working for you, more power to you.

 

BTW, I reiterate, it was just something I NOTICED and it turned me off. Not intended to bash you or paint you as horrible or anything.

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Revolver

Revolver

Posted
Posted

 

Even the ladies... The prettiest girls who lack confidence or have negative attitudes? They struggle. The plain Janes or the chubby girls who light up the room with their personalities? No trouble.

 

.

 

I'm sorry but this is bull**** lmao. Now your just making **** up on the fly

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ThaWholigan

ThaWholigan

Posted
Posted
I'm sorry but this is bull**** lmao. Now your just making **** up on the fly

It's not complete bollocks - I've personally known some gorgeous women who never date or get hit on. My advice for them is always to go on OLD :laugh:.

 

Contrast to some of the more....."normal" looking women who have dick chasing them all day :laugh:. It happens.....

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Star Gazer

Star Gazer

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Nope. That's why I'm going to change. ;)

 

If yours is working for you, more power to you.

 

BTW, I reiterate, it was just something I NOTICED and it turned me off. Not intended to bash you or paint you as horrible or anything.

 

You "NOTICED" something that's just not true, that I don't do. :shrug:

 

And you didn't quote where I allegedly called you a loser. (Note: You won't be able to, because I didn't do that either.)

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jma500

jma500

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Posted
Quote me where I had that reaction to your posts.

 

My attitude may turn you off, but I really don't care as my perspective and personality are working for me. Can you say the same about yours?

 

Also, you're not my target demo. ;) I don't care if negative men (you said you owned it) don't like me, because I don't like them. And, your advice, if followed, would attract negative men. No thanks!!

 

Simply put you are arrogant and believe yourself to be oh so above those you are pontificating down to.

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JuneJulySeptember

JuneJulySeptember

Posted
Posted
You "NOTICED" something that's just not true, that I don't do. :shrug:

 

And you didn't quote where I allegedly called you a loser. (Note: You won't be able to, because I didn't do that either.)

 

You didn't. I just was speaking in general.

 

I hate it when people throw unattractive, hideous, and ugly around to describe others like it's a fact of life. But that's just me. The other day, I went to see a comedian and he was calling the woman from Precious ugly, like really ripping on her. And it upset me. What if she got a hold of that clip?

 

Anyway, perhaps I judged you too quickly. Just forget it.

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ltjg45

ltjg45

Posted
Posted

Here's the ironic part about all of this.

 

This thread has no point. What the OP posted was just an impossible example of a ugly guy getting the attention of 3 attractive women within the matter of minutes.

 

1. They are Brazillian women. They, and like every other foreign woman, are typically more outgoing than American women. This doesn't work on American women, esp. when they already have their dating battle scars.

2. We don't know the projected attractiveness level of the male in question. It is assumed that he is ugly.

3. The women in question looks like the kind of women that is out and looking to have a good time. To say that he has "scored" with them is overrated. The best he could have is 3 Brazillian female friends.

 

The best part? It is when you start seeing the dollar signs, the cost you need to acquire this knowledge so you can do the same.

 

Which means that everything that was said in the OP is a lie. That never happened. A bit fat scam aiming to see if the person reading it is dumb enough to fall for it.

 

If there is one thing worse than giving up, it's believing these lies and buying a bunch of garbage thinking that will change your luck.

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jma500

jma500

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Alright guys, let.s get back on subject please?

 

This from the poster who has been insulting others including myself.

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Maleficent

Maleficent

Posted
Posted (edited)
This from the poster who has been insulting others including myself.

 

I insulted others? remember this?

It's our first contact on this thread. You said this.

 

What are you twelve years old?

Why should i work at something that is handed to others as a reward for being great looking? I learned this lesson in my mid to late teens and confirmed it in my twenties. You see i had a great looking friend then. He did nothing and had women throwing themselves at him while they ignored me. This lesson still resounds today. I have never forgotten it and i am 44.

 

I also reviewed the posts. I didn't insult anyone directly.

Edited by Maleficent
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Treasa

Treasa

Posted
Posted
You didn't. I just was speaking in general.

 

I hate it when people throw unattractive, hideous, and ugly around to describe others like it's a fact of life. But that's just me. The other day, I went to see a comedian and he was calling the woman from Precious ugly, like really ripping on her. And it upset me. What if she got a hold of that clip?

 

Anyway, perhaps I judged you too quickly. Just forget it.

 

Yeah, I don't like it, either. But people are going to behave how they want to behave.

 

Maybe the actress doesn't give a crap. I'm sure she's heard equal or worse. We can choose to change how we think and feel about things. It's a lot easier than trying to change someone else.

 

I'm sure none of you are ugly. Of course, I tend to see beauty in people more than any ugliness, but even if I were to judge just your looks, I'm certain I wouldn't find any of you unattractive.

 

Unless you're a total, irredeemable douche. Then I might make an exception.

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Star Gazer

Star Gazer

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Simply put you are arrogant and believe yourself to be oh so above those you are pontificating down to.

 

I prefer the terms confident and more learned from experience. :)

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Star Gazer

Star Gazer

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Posted
I'm sure none of you are ugly.

 

And herein lies the proof.

 

I've seen several pictures of several members in this thread who claim or believe it's their looks that are the problem. Truth is, they're all pretty objectively handsome. So what should that tell them?

 

That it's not their looks that's the problem.

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Treasa

Treasa

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I have never seen any lookers on LS.

 

Thankfully, attraction is subjective and people don't have to agree with you, me, or anyone else. :)

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ltjg45

ltjg45

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Yeah, it's my lack of finding minimal-wage work.

 

That is the reason why there is no chance in hell I can even garner attention from a woman.

 

I'm at least is willing to admit that much. I'm not so stupid to the point where I can say that a decent woman wants a broke man

 

That is provided I'm worthy of being called a "man".

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Star Gazer

Star Gazer

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Posted
I have never seen any lookers on LS.

 

Oh, I have. :love:

 

In fact, everyone who's shared their photos has been pretty/handsome in my eyes. I haven't seen anyone who I could understand why they'd think it was their looks that was causing their troubles.

 

OP is a perfect example. I was like, "Whaaaa?"

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Treasa

Treasa

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Oh, I have. :love:

 

In fact, everyone who's shared their photos has been pretty/handsome in my eyes. I haven't seen anyone who I could understand why they'd think it was their looks that was causing their troubles.

 

OP is a perfect example. I was like, "Whaaaa?"

 

Imajerk17, THE HELL, DUDE?? Why haven't I seen a picture of you? :mad:

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