is there a solution to this problem

[#sansu#]

i am new to this forum .my problem is that i was born with out a left hand(below elbow amputee).i was never happy with this situation of mine.i have a younger brother and an elder sister.both of them respect me to some extent.my mother says that when i was born ,for an hour i was`nt feed her milk on the issue to keep this one hand baby alive.but somehow some law of destiny saved me.my mother also says that when my younger brother was born i cried for days for the reason that the younger had two hands and i had one.but for my family every thing got normal.at the age of 10 my dad shifted my mother to look after a departmental store which he inherrited from grandfather.the departmental store was in some other part of the city as a result my mother continued to stay over there and she reduced the number of wisits which she paid to her childrens.

 

thereafter we all had to get independent in our activities.some days after my sister got married. thereafter my mother used to come only once a week.i and my brother started having fights over very small issues.always my father used to support my yonuger brother .there was no one to fight for me.there after i felt detached from that family.

 

i finished my schooling.i had the ambition of becoming a doctor .but because of the physical disability i could not work up to the expec.tations of my father and my familiy.my father used to ocassionly curse me for my disability.there was no problem with my marks any way.i was denied admission to science college because my father had heard from his friends that a physically handicapped can not do science ,for the reason that the candidate can not perform the practicals properly. the argument from my side is that i could have done science using computer controlled electronic hand which was not beyond our budget.but because of my fathers dicrmination policy my dreams were broken.i was made to do engineering .today i am in my third year.

 

today my brother is preparing for medical.he is being appreciated for every small thing he does.now i feel cheated that my father made a big big wrong decision about my life.although i am the elder one still my course is not been respected.my father still keeps insulting me whenever he gets a chance .my mother lives on the place i mentioned earlier. there is no one to look after me .

 

my father is obssesive about me that he wants me to what ever he likes.even on parents teacher meeting i never had a single parent to accompany me . for this i had to give false and stupid excuses to my teachers. ihad to lie for this.so the main problem i face is that

 

1) i dont know that do they really love me equally as my younger brother.

 

2)i dont know wether to respect as my parents as any other childrens love their parents.

 

sometimes i hate them so much that i feel like killing them.i always keep alone .i dont like talking to people.because of this habbit i can not make friends.a person who does`nt know me finds no difficulty to say that your are really depressed.i dont understand how they come to know my mental status.my argument is that my parents should have aborted this handicapped baby when they really hate people like that.i dont know how to handle such parents.i do not understand why people hate humans with one hand or one leg etc.although they (the handicapped babies)themselves are not responsible for that.can you all tell me the real reason for this.how can i give justice to my parents because they want love and and respect from me which i cannot give them.

 

what about the love life of this babies when they grow up.how they will marry. what happens when they fall in love .who will pay their love.these hopeless ,defenceless people continue to live in this world as sign of their parents love.but what about their love.

 

the penalty for a rape is 7 years.the penalty for a murder is 14 to 15 year imprisonment.but for what mistake i am serving a life imprisonment in this world.please answer very fast as soon as possible.

[kimmi]

i am new to this forum .my problem is that i was born with out a left hand(below elbow amputee).i was never happy with this situation of mine.i have a younger brother and an elder sister.both of them respect me to some extent.my mother says that when i was born ,for an hour i was`nt feed her milk on the issue to keep this one hand baby alive.but somehow some law of destiny saved me.my mother also says that when my younger brother was born i cried for days for the reason that the younger had two hands and i had one.but for my family every thing got normal.at the age of 10 my dad shifted my mother to look after a departmental store which he inherrited from grandfather.the departmental store was in some other part of the city as a result my mother continued to stay over there and she reduced the number of wisits which she paid to her childrens. thereafter we all had to get independent in our activities.some days after my sister got married. thereafter my mother used to come only once a week.i and my brother started having fights over very small issues.always my father used to support my yonuger brother .there was no one to fight for me.there after i felt detached from that family. i finished my schooling.i had the ambition of becoming a doctor .but because of the physical disability i could not work up to the expec.tations of my father and my familiy.my father used to ocassionly curse me for my disability.there was no problem with my marks any way.i was denied admission to science college because my father had heard from his friends that a physically handicapped can not do science ,for the reason that the candidate can not perform the practicals properly. the argument from my side is that i could have done science using computer controlled electronic hand which was not beyond our budget.but because of my fathers dicrmination policy my dreams were broken.i was made to do engineering .today i am in my third year. today my brother is preparing for medical.he is being appreciated for every small thing he does.now i feel cheated that my father made a big big wrong decision about my life.although i am the elder one still my course is not been respected.my father still keeps insulting me whenever he gets a chance .my mother lives on the place i mentioned earlier. there is no one to look after me . my father is obssesive about me that he wants me to what ever he likes.even on parents teacher meeting i never had a single parent to accompany me . for this i had to give false and stupid excuses to my teachers. ihad to lie for this.so the main problem i face is that 1) i dont know that do they really love me equally as my younger brother. 2)i dont know wether to respect as my parents as any other childrens love their parents. sometimes i hate them so much that i feel like killing them.i always keep alone .i dont like talking to people.because of this habbit i can not make friends.a person who does`nt know me finds no difficulty to say that your are really depressed.i dont understand how they come to know my mental status.my argument is that my parents should have aborted this handicapped baby when they really hate people like that.i dont know how to handle such parents.i do not understand why people hate humans with one hand or one leg etc.although they (the handicapped babies)themselves are not responsible for that.can you all tell me the real reason for this.how can i give justice to my parents because they want love and and respect from me which i cannot give them. what about the love life of this babies when they grow up.how they will marry. what happens when they fall in love .who will pay their love.these hopeless ,defenceless people continue to live in this world as sign of their parents love.but what about their love. the penalty for a rape is 7 years.the penalty for a murder is 14 to 15 year imprisonment.but for what mistake i am serving a life imprisonment in this world.please answer very fast as soon as possible.

i just read your post and i am feeling very sad for your situation.

 

I am a mother to a 9 year old daughter who was born with craniofacial syndrom, she had her head reconstructed when she was 9 months old and this continunes on ever year, more stuff happens with her, i love her with all my heart.

 

i do not really know how you can deal with the situation at hand except for trying to clue them out, what is said and done to you is so crule.

 

You can do whatever you want , i do not care what the handicap has done for you in your parents eyes, riase above them and become your dream, appeal thing if you do not get what you want. try to do it through a handicap associasion.

 

my daughter has a older sister and a younger brother, i am scared that she will feel the same way. although it would not do nothing i wish that i could scream at your parents, i wish that they were open enough to see the hurt that you feel and the anger.

 

I want to ask you a few questions?

 

how old are you ?

 

would you have a respectful place to go to if you left home?

 

can you make it on your own?

 

do you live in canada? U.S.A ?

 

have you looked on the internet for resourses on how to help yourself?

 

all i can say right now is that i am feeling for you.

 

get back if you can with the answers? please..

 

best to you

 

kimmi