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I have already asked for some advice from some friends but things just still aren't sitting well with me. To start this is my fort real relationship and I have been with her for just over a year. During this time though we had gone through a period of time where we didnt talk (my choice) and had decided to just be friends because I was leaving for basic training. In the just friends time frame she had made out with another guy but nothing too serious. We ended up getting back together right before I left for basic training though. About 3 or 4 weeks into basic training I got a letter from her saying that we rushed into things and just should have stayed friends. She started drinking and going to parties and made out with someone. Then she went to a Christmas dance with a guy, got drunk and made out with him and stayed over at the house. It was her friends and their dates to the dance that all stayed over. After completing basic I found out only about the first guy and I was just really hurt. I always thought something happened after the dance though. I ended up being able to come home for like 5 days and though I was hurt things seemed to get better. I left around the 27th of December and she kissed the same guy from the dance on New Years. She ended up staying at his house but insists nothing happened besides kissing at the party while she was drinking. I really don't believe it though. I didn't find out about this until just a few days ago, 5 months after it all happened. She told me, but only because I asked. She didnt even tell me all of it right away though. I just feel like **** and don't trust her at all. I thought things were getting better. Then I found out about all of this. Just looking for some general relationship advice. I'll be seeing her for the first time since December at the end of this month but I don't know how to feel about it all. Part of me thinks I should end it but I'm just so in love with her I don't want to. I just hate that all of this happened because I would never do anything like it to her. I appreciate any advice you can give me.

 

Also I forgot to add that I'm now on the other side of the country for about another year and a half.

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Part of me thinks I should end it but I'm just so in love with her I don't want to. I just hate that all of this happened because I would never do anything like it to her. I appreciate any advice you can give me.

 

No you're not. You're just miffed that another guy got some from her. Now that you're in the military, you're going to have to start thinking more with your brain and not get so emotionally attached to women like you are right now. It's the nature of the business, and women will make you do some very stupid sh*t, some of which will have real and lasting consequences.

 

You're young and in a period of incredible transition and change; so move on and meet other women. You'll soon realize there's a whole world out there for you. You're going to regret being emotionally tied down to someone who isn't offering that same emotional attachment back to you.

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salparadise
I just feel like **** and don't trust her at all. I thought things were getting better. Then I found out about all of this. Just looking for some general relationship advice.

 

Pay attention to your instincts. She's playing the field––and you. Women don't kiss and make out with guys, then sleep over for reasons unrelated to the kissing and making out... don't be naive.

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