SJC2008 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 I see the E word popoing up a lot in this thread. The type of relationship matters more than the length. The last woman I dated had a 7 year R and she wouldn't admit if she was wrong if she had the tip of a nuclear missile pointed at her head. So on "paper" she's WAY more exp'd than me but I garonteee that I have WAY more problem solving skills and way better communication skills than she could dream. Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 Am I the only one who finds it funny that this thread is divided into two polar opposite camps: One who thinks SD only wants her for sex, and another chiding him for being an emotional tampon by letting up too much on the sex? The suggestions to 'stop being an emotional tampon, she should have had sex with you by now if she's interested' are ridiculous! The two aren't even bf/gf yet, she's against abortion so she's understandably worried about pregnancy, and she's told him point blank her reasons for desiring to wait. If he chooses to wait, he isn't being a chump or an emotional tampon - he's making an informed choice to keep this R going! Like, you know, an adult. Last I checked, he isn't exactly uninterested in their conversations or dates either. Refusing to sleep over any more isn't going to help with the progression of this R, either. He has the prerogative to stop if he really needs to, but it's not going to help in any way or form. "Wow, dude stopped wanting to cuddle and make out and sleep over, I'd better have sex with him now to keep him even though I'd rather have waited," said no emotionally healthy woman ever. Personally, I think his R is progressing organically and quite well, despite the two people in it being very young or inexperienced. She should sleep with him when she's ready, not one nanosecond sooner. TBS I don't neccessarily think she should of slept with him by now but in these days of 3rd date sex and the fact that she's known him for a few months; It boils down to he's either a rebound or he went to the dark side of the moon and found a woman of a very small percentile who will "wait"/enforce her boundaries. Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewJDC Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 SD come across as creepy in this thread, but I don't think he really is. I think he just needs to enjoy the moment and let sex happen naturally, alternatively he needs to talk about it with her to see how things can progress. She may be waiting for him to lead into it naturally but his inexperience may be stopping this from happening in a way she is happy with. All girls are different, I've had sex on first to third dates and had to wait 6 weeks, there is no fixed rule. Waiting 6 weeks was the best, 3 years on we are engaged and have a little boy. Let life happen, don't live by other people's happenings and enjoy. Also proportionally the age difference is large so that will potentially be a contributing factor, but hey, at least she will be nice and tight... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 SD come across as creepy in this thread, but I don't think he really is. I think he just needs to enjoy the moment and let sex happen naturally, alternatively he needs to talk about it with her to see how things can progress. She may be waiting for him to lead into it naturally but his inexperience may be stopping this from happening in a way she is happy with. All girls are different, I've had sex on first to third dates and had to wait 6 weeks, there is no fixed rule. Waiting 6 weeks was the best, 3 years on we are engaged and have a little boy. Let life happen, don't live by other people's happenings and enjoy. Also proportionally the age difference is large so that will potentially be a contributing factor, but hey, at least she will be nice and tight... I read this whole post and the whole time I'm nodding my head like "yup" and then I get to this part and I'm like "dafuq?" 7 Link to post Share on other sites
Dusk1983 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 I read this whole post and the whole time I'm nodding my head like "yup" and then I get to this part and I'm like "dafuq?" It's the same for me when I read your posts Joe, except that's one long "dafuq?" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewJDC Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 I read this whole post and the whole time I'm nodding my head like "yup" and then I get to this part and I'm like "dafuq?" ha ha. yeah, just put that in randomly for the fun! Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewJDC Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 So some dude thinks he's amazing, all he can talk about is boobs and sex and he gets the girl. Yet nice guys who would never be this disrespectful to women get left in the dust. You have it completely wrong, guy is very self deprecating and at 31 this is the first time has got close to getting the girl. His inexperience and sheer joy at the situation is making him come across poorly. ps nice guys don't get the girl, you need some edge, like hulk hogan. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
iris219 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 So some dude thinks he's amazing, all he can talk about is boobs and sex and he gets the girl. Yet nice guys who would never be this disrespectful to women get left in the dust. So SD is a bad boy now. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 I always knew SD had it in him. Even in his most bitter moments, he was very witty and sarcastic. I remember that there was a thread a 6 or so months ago when someone asked which of the LS struggling guys will be first to get a gf. I predicted SD 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted July 1, 2013 Author Share Posted July 1, 2013 So some dude thinks he's amazing, all he can talk about is boobs and sex and he gets the girl. Yet nice guys who would never be this disrespectful to women get left in the dust. Ha ha ha! Yeah I slapped her on the ass during the first date and I motorboat her boobs every time I see her. So SD is a bad boy now. Never in a million years would I think that I would make the jump from nice guy to jerk. I guess I'm one of them now. (PS: None of the above are true) 3 Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewJDC Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 So apparently he was a nice guy, didn't get the girl, then got that bad boy edge, then got a girl. Exactly how I thought. And he gets free pass on bad boyness due to being inexperienced. Well played! I need that bad boy edge for myself. Thanks for confirming. In my opinion you just need to be comfortable in your own skin, unless you're hideously ugly you will find a girl. However, unless you are stunning you can't expect girls to approach you either. You need to leave your comfort zone, expand the number of girls available to you e.g. through online dating and try not to expect too much from each date. You're clearly low, but you need to get past this. From what I understand women like confident guys, not wishy washy victims. Be confident, show her a good fun time, don't take yourself too seriously and you will be fine. Link to post Share on other sites
krz12 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 Someone who has been mowing through relationships for a decade is probably a tad less horny than someone for whom this is new and exciting. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Thought I'd check in...haven't read anything before the last page...but I assume that things are still going ok, they're just not at the point of having sex...? Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Thought I'd check in...haven't read anything before the last page...but I assume that things are still going ok, they're just not at the point of having sex...? Pretty much. And SD really wants to have sex. So there are now posters arguing that he only likes this girl for sex vs posters thinking that SD genuinely likes her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Pretty much. And SD really wants to have sex. I see nothing wrong with this. So there are now posters arguing that he only likes this girl for sex vs posters thinking that SD genuinely likes her. Of course...it's either one or the other... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 Yes I like her. No sex yet. Maybe soon. Though I don't mind waiting as long as she wants to. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Yes I like her. No sex yet. Maybe soon. Though I don't mind waiting as long as she wants to. Try not to think about it. When I slept with the last woman we started out at the movies, went to a bar, got some drive thru and went to a park to eat. One thing led to another and we had sex under the stars. Before the date I planned on getting more physical, hopefully some boobie action. Of course I had no idea how I was going to make that happen at the mivies so I didn't think about it. Just go with the flow and sooner or later it will happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Cool Keep it up and real Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Well, genuinely liking other person vs only liking them for sex ARE mutually exclusive right? Here's how I see it...you have two factors, (1) genuinely like other person and (2) want to have sex with other person. There are four basic possibilities: (1) Genuinely like the other person and want to have sex with them. (2) Genuinely like the other person and don't want to have sex with them. (3) Don't genuinely like the other person and want to have sex with them. (4) Don't genuinely like the other person and don't want to have sex with them. Why is everyone so vehemently discounting the possibility of (1)...? Are you suggesting that if someone wants to have sex with someone, then they must not genuinely like them? Or if someone genuinely likes someone, they must not want to have sex with them? Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 I have never stated (1) is impossible, if that is what you're aiming for, but as far as I understand, some people assume somedude's case is (3). And the basis for this assumption...? Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 And the basis for this assumption...? Oh god Hokie! You're not new around here, why would you ask this...now we are going to get million page posts that quote single sentences, out of context or meaning greatly exaggerated, that SD has said as "proof". NOOOOO. take this question back!!! peruse the thread, any post longer than say, 3 short paragraphs is a post that explains, unfortunately in GREAT DETAIL, why they think SD is apparently a liar who doesn't actually like this girl and just wants sex/experience. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Oh god Hokie! You're not new around here, why would you ask this...now we are going to get million page posts that quote single sentences, out of context or meaning greatly exaggerated, that SD has said as "proof". NOOOOO. take this question back!!! peruse the thread, any post longer than say, 3 short paragraphs is a post that explains, unfortunately in GREAT DETAIL, why they think SD is apparently a liar who doesn't actually like this girl and just wants sex/experience. Perhaps it was just part of my master plan to come back for a day to ask this question to incite riots, and then leave without ever reading said riots. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Perhaps it was just part of my master plan to come back for a day to ask this question to incite riots, and then leave without ever reading said riots. that wouldn't surprise me the slightest 1 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 that wouldn't surprise me the slightest Clearly SD was on my mind this whole time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Thread starter, if you wish to add any updates or solicit further comments, please alert on this post and request reopening from moderation. Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts