pteromom Posted June 7, 2013 Share Posted June 7, 2013 SD - this is great, and the timing is perfect. Don't worry about how many times you'll make out before sex. Just enjoy the moment and be appreciative of your time with her. Be respectful and communicate. She may end up giving you a BJ or something before you ever get to intercourse, but it may be a bit before that happens. Just enjoy the ride and stay in the moment. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted June 7, 2013 Share Posted June 7, 2013 Wow very cool sd! Exciting! Sorry people can't let you have just one thread without starting a debate about you. How obnoxious. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
tman666 Posted June 7, 2013 Share Posted June 7, 2013 Glad to hear things are still going well for you! Definitely never mention LS to her. As much as we love hearing these updates and are rooting for your success, Castle's suggestion of staying off of this site and others is probably a very good idea. At this point, go with your gut and don't worry. Learn to read her emotions and what makes her tick. You'll be able to do this better with a clear head. As far as your trouble sleeping with her in the bed with you, I remember those days too, haha. It will pass as you get more used to each other. If possible, save your money and buy a "big boy" bed (queen or larger) if you don't have one already. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 7, 2013 Share Posted June 7, 2013 MrCastle I dare you to make one more post 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 The reason for the details was that it was the best way for me to explain that we got close to sex but didn't go that far. It was also fun to remember what happened and write about. I'm not going to go into more explicit details other than saying we've had sex, if it ever gets to that point. Star Gazer's post about building intimacy is spot on. And now that I think of it, yeah this was physical intimacy and the first time I've ever experienced it. It was not something I expected at all. Yes I do have a queen bed, but she made it feel like it was a twin. So yeah I had a ton of trouble sleeping, for several reasons, and I ended up taking a nap for a few hours around noon. And now I have to somehow keep this going while she's out of town for a while. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
lino Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Well done! Been a long time coming for you mate 1 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 I'm not going to go into more explicit details other than saying we've had sex, if it ever gets to that point. What!??!??! You better. If not, sheesh, what am I hanging out on this thread for?!?! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 LS dating victory of the year!! 8 Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 What!??!??! You better. If not, sheesh, what am I hanging out on this thread for?!?! Heh, I don't want this to get turned into erotica and have my thread moved into the sex section. I'm just actually happy I have a thread that actually belongs in the dating forum. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 amazingdude81, I am super happy for you! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Xinreeki Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 No they aren't conflicting. I really wanted to have sex with her, and we were so close for a while. If we keep having experiences of almost having sex but not, I'm going to go insane. As for figuring out if we're compatible, there's no question on my end. Though I'm sure she needs to figure out more stuff, and she just got of a long relationship. I also know that sex means different things to women so she probably wants to protect herself for now. Well I guess those statements aren't necessarily conflicting yet... but they are incredibly close to a conflict and are definitely in danger of becoming contradictory.... As (assuming for a moment that things WERE to continue as they are doing)... either she is "the best thing that has ever happened to you", or "she is going to drive you insane"... And unless becoming insane is what you deem to be "the best thing that could ever happen to you", then yes, those statements are conflicting.... but only IF things continue as they are doing of course... Which seems unlikely in this case from what you've said, but of course you'll know her much better than me... All I'm saying is that you might want to try and stay clear of that kind of negative thinking, because I know from experience that negative thinking can in of itself have a negative effect on a relationship... I know its hard, believe me, but I'm not going to give up this battle against my negative thinking, and I guess I'm just trying to help you stay on top of your negative thinking too. After all, I know how badly you don't want to screw this up, and hindsight can be like 20 - 20 vision sometimes... but by the time hindsight comes into play its too late... Anywho, I honestly do wish you all the best. Sounds like it is going great so far from all you've said! Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 There's nothing for me to add outside of this. Congrats, SD. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 (edited) Not for nothing, Somedude81, but your story is pretty fascinating. I've been following it for a while. I'm glad to hear that things are going well, but what impresses me more is that you really seem to have turned a corner psychologically. Like when you said, "All I need is one attractive woman to like me and I'll be a new man." it seems like you were right the whole time. I can tell it in your posts. You seem like a new person. Others here seem to date and date, but a lot of their attitudes and posts stay the same. You really seem to have changed your attitude and interaction with other posters and your attitude towards women. It's not only noticeable, it's pretty compelling. Contrast that to the woman who you were obsessed with a while ago and your attitude back then. I think a lot has to do with luck and approach. You tempered your investment, would not accept the friendzone, and adopted a more shotgun approach. But I'll tell you. You were lucky. I thought more likely, you would find a girl that you had lukewarm attraction to who had lukewarm attraction to you, and you'd start off with your first one that way. So, your attitude might have stayed the same if that were the case. But you really seem to have struck gold with someone you're emotionally and physically into. And I'm happy for you. It only takes one. Who knows? This could be the end of the story for you dating wise. I think you should write a memoir of your dating experiences and sell it to struggling men the world over. It's inspiring stuff. Edited June 8, 2013 by JuneJulySeptember 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 It sucks that she's going away for 2 weeks. Although, Somedude - it could be good to have this time, to well, calm down a bit! This is all a lot to process, since you wanted a girlfriend so badly, and not only have you got that: this is the first girl that you have actually liked! I honestly think that the time away is a good thing.... being happy is one thing, and somedude SHOULD be happy!!!!!! This is honestly great! But I do think he needs to calm down a little. Saying she's the best thing that has ever happened and also the fact he admitted that he was desperate for a girlfriend? I agree with Treasa, that this could be a cause for concern. Sorry somedude, this is still fcking awesome! It's a big thing that someone finally sees what a cooldude you are. Just take this time to compose yourself. Yes it is great you have finally found this girl, but try not to let it rule your whole life too much....... try to find a balance between being really into her, yet knowing that it may or may not work out. I just don't want to see you too upset if things don't work out, and you have a lot to lose due to placing such emphasis on needing a girlfriend. OMG though it really made my day though, to read about you finally having the chance to have a girl enjoy all that you have to offer. Good luck with it all. Try not to think too much or hard about it. Yet you will think a lot about her LOL. You know, just try to not obsess tooooo much 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Titania22 Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Belated Congratulations Somedude81. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
DannyMason Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Somedude81 is God. Link to post Share on other sites
ThaWholigan Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 She prob senses it wont mean much to you. I wouldnt sleep with a guy with your attitude. Ive been following your posts for awhile and you are just desperate for any experience, doesnt matter who the girl is GTFOH pbjbear - we know it's you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
fortyninethousand322 Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Somedude81 is God. Well, ... Link to post Share on other sites
SmileFace Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Good deal! Keep your time here limited - as in relaying all the details. Not because of the people here but you need not to be reliant on the advice of others for each and every step along the way. It won't help you as it develops. Updates - few and far between are great. However real advice really should come from friends and people closer to you - not the board. No offense board. Ok, offense. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Alright SD! Got some boobie action lol! I do admint in the midst of your sucess I do feel jealous but ready to break through brother and start a loveshack streak brother! I do have to ask:) When things got heavy and the moment when all the overanalyzing went away and your man instincts kicked in wasn't that aweseome? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 I forgot to say congrats again somedude Your story actually gives me hope for my own struggles. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 SomeAmazingDude81. Definitely sounds better. Wow, she's liked you since April? And there you were thinking that she'd just reject you like the others. Goes to show how important it is to actually give it a shot, huh? 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 And MrCastle is on LS again 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sillyanswer Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Yes I do have a queen bed, but she made it feel like it was a twin. So yeah I had a ton of trouble sleeping, for several reasons, and I ended up taking a nap for a few hours around noon. I think it takes lots of people a while to get used to sleeping with someone new if they're used to sleeping alone. I know I don't sleep well in that situation. Maybe your friend didn't sleep too well, either, so if you're looking for something to start a conversation with you could ask her. Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 I think it takes lots of people a while to get used to sleeping with someone new if they're used to sleeping alone. I know I don't sleep well in that situation. Maybe your friend didn't sleep too well, either, so if you're looking for something to start a conversation with you could ask her. I am lucky if I get 2 hours of broken sleep in a new guy's bed. It takes me a long while to fully relax. Link to post Share on other sites
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