SweetiePie12 Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 Yet, that is exactly where you find yourself. Engaging in a relationship with a man that is not even willing to give up his current girlfriend to make your relationship a valid one. Well, there's nothing "invalid" about us. How can you stand that? Or is it an ego boost to know that you are taking something that belongs to someone else? He belongs to God. Because at this point it does not make sense to me. Well, it's working for us. Good day. Link to post Share on other sites
underwater2010 Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 Well, there's nothing "invalid" about us. He belongs to God. Well, it's working for us. Good day. Okay...maybe I phrased it wrong. What it is that makes you willing to accept second place? Because that is exactly how he is treating you. I never would have accepted that in a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author spiderowl Posted June 10, 2013 Author Share Posted June 10, 2013 No....if someone is considered to be in a monogamous relationship then they are off limits. My question is why would you even consider that an attached person is an option for a relationship? That signals that there is something you are lacking, considering you are aware that they are attached to another person. Completely agree. I just wondered if others saw it the same way or whether a significant number of people didn't consider people in long-term relationships to be off limits. Link to post Share on other sites
underwater2010 Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 After being touched by infidelity and researching BOTH side via the internet, I have found that nothing is off limits and that there are quite a few people who don't care one bit who they hurt in the process. Scary isn't it? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SweetiePie12 Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 What it is that makes you willing to accept second place? I don't really think we perceive things that way. He has his life & I: mine. There's no relay race going on where someone is 1st, 2nd, 3rd place, etc.. Because that is exactly how he is treating you. Well, I'd suggest you not presume to know the way he treats me. We're good. Indeed. Link to post Share on other sites
underwater2010 Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 I don't really think we perceive things that way. He has his life & I: mine. There's no relay race going on where someone is 1st, 2nd, 3rd place, etc.. Well, I'd suggest you not presume to know the way he treats me. We're good. Indeed. Does he spend every night, holiday and weekend with you? Do you communicate when and if you want to? And why oh why does he continue a relationship with another person? I do realize this is not a race....but how can you accept that he does not/will not put you first? I have read your posts over and over. I see how much you wish for his girlfriend to figure things out. I see how much you detest her existence in his life. Yet you seem this all to be acceptable. You are right....I never will get it. I really don't want to. I just find it sad. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
snowflakes88 Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 Well, I'd suggest you not presume to know the way he treats me. We're good. Indeed. It's like you forget that you've posted all of the thoughtless things he's said and done to you on this board. Loves you only as a FWB. Only kept you longer than the rest of his OW because you live close. Carries on with you because you're "cool." Doesn't take you anywhere outside of your apartment. Has started limiting communication with you. Doesn't spend time with you in the evenings anymore. You post this stuff - nobody is making it up out of thin air. Most women wouldn't tolerate that crap in a relationship, be it "traditional," affair, or otherwise. You do. You're a doormat for this guy and it seems like you were/are a doormat for the ex you keep reaching out to, despite the fact that he ignores you. You seem like a bright lady. I wish you could cut the delusion and defensiveness long enough to acknowledge that you are sorely lacking in self-worth and try to get to the root of it. Your faux confidence is deli thin. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
meeji Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 A relationship is a relationship whether it is filed on paper or not.... I don't see a difference at all. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SweetiePie12 Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 Has started limiting communication with you. Not at all! Link to post Share on other sites
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