Help - how to tell if there is a hidden camera?

[afraid]

For some time I have the feeling that my boyfriend is spying on me some how. He is a computer genius. It used to be worse I had more of these feelings a year or so ago. I first felt this way it was because of odd experiences, like knowing when I had done bikini line and other coinsidences.

 

Confession here - I spied on him because I felt suspicious - I wanted to look at the web sites that he had visited and have my fears allayed.

 

Two years ago when I first looked he had many naked lady pictures and had even saved some. I got scared.

 

I also had a feeling then he would drives out somewhere and watches what I do, or listens - just something. In the bathroom most times.

 

I noticed he would arrive home seconds after me and once he said he was out somewhere so I rang from a public phone and he answered, when I asked him what he'd done that day he said he was OUT at ...... But he wasnt.

 

I do know he is intuitive, I am probably paranoid.

 

I decided to look again recent like, yes he had been to nude sites. But all I saw was a 1-2 voyeur placesvisited often.

 

When I used to feel worse and I had a constant feeling of being watched and got advice - a counsellor said to ask directly. Have you ever taken pictures without me knowing, he denied it.

 

How can i find out?

 

The feeling has lessened since the time I asked him that. But sometimes the feeling is still there. Please help me - how do I find a camera hidden if there is one.

[Tony T]

This paranoia is not what healthy relationships are made of. If you think your boyfriend is spying on you, there is obviously a serious trust issue here and you should review the relationship.

 

If you have felt this way for some time, you may want to get checked out yourself to see if you may have some psychological issues dealing with paranoia. However, if you have good reason to feel your boyfriend is spying on you, the only issue you have is why you are remaining in the relationship.

 

There are several ways to find out if you are being spied upon. First, look for tiny cameras in places such as on walls, behind mirrors, in lampshades, in overhead light fixtures, etc. Call your local police detective division for hints on where cameras might be hidden.

 

Secondly, a good private detective agency is well equipped to detect cameras and other devices. There would be a charge but it sounds like it would be worth it to you to find out. The only problem there is that he could be putting up the cameras and taking them down intermittently.

 

The best way to find out for sure is to take a guy into your place while your boyfriend is at work, go into every room, kiss him and hold him for a minute or two. If you are being spied upon, you will see a serious reaction from your boyfriend. Since you don't want to be spied upon and that would be proof that he continues to do so, it would be no big deal to break up with him at that time.

[Taressa]

I'm not sure a hidden camera is what we need to worry about here... either your boyfriend is an untrustworthy creep or you have some ungrounded emotional distrust with him.

 

I'm glad you've sought counseling and hope you will continue to do so. And while I do not think it necessary that you break up with this fellow, I would urge you to back off of the intimacy with him. Lovemaking and all that leads up to you should be experienced with someone you trust yourself completely to... if you're not in that kind of relationship you are cheating yourself of something beautiful and making it a compromised experience.

 

Until you've decided he is completely trustworthy, consider stopping all behavior that could be embarassing were you to discover it had been taped.

[Deejette]

The whole thing doesn't sound very healthy: You spying on him, him spying on you. This is not the way a loving relationship proceeds. Trust is the foundation of a great relationship, and, obviously, neither of you have it for each other.

 

If you feel that something funny is going on, you are probably right. What is the point of all of this spying and counterspying? It just leads to more and more insecurity.

I'm not sure a hidden camera is what we need to worry about here... either your boyfriend is an untrustworthy creep or you have some ungrounded emotional distrust with him. I'm glad you've sought counseling and hope you will continue to do so. And while I do not think it necessary that you break up with this fellow, I would urge you to back off of the intimacy with him. Lovemaking and all that leads up to you should be experienced with someone you trust yourself completely to... if you're not in that kind of relationship you are cheating yourself of something beautiful and making it a compromised experience. Until you've decided he is completely trustworthy, consider stopping all behavior that could be embarassing were you to discover it had been taped.

[afraid]

thanks for the help Tony Dejette and Taressa.

 

I have been blocking out feelings of fear with medication too. like diazepan - and it has got worse - maybe it is paranoia but what about all the conincidences?

 

If I am medicated would this change my thoughts or even attract negative ones? Ive been thinking about this for ages - someone told me that people who take drugs are prone to awful entity things - too scary to even think of.

 

I fear I may be wrong yet theres a lot to back up the feelings that I am not.

 

I feel helpless and afraid and this is not how I used to be.

 

Im sorry for not mentioning the medication in my post at first.

[Tony T]

Your tranquilizer medication can absolutely bring on or worsen feelings of paranoia. Talk to the physician who prescribed them about this.

 

This is NOT a good situation...NOT good at all. Do something about all this now. Do not live like this!!!