quite a complex problem, need to choose between guys

[ohbabyitsawildworld]

wow, my life it is quite complex indeend.

apparantly ive been told that any relationship ive had has never really been that... but more "beneficial" for him (them). but i dont seem to agree and i cant figure out what to do so please can someone just lend their advice.

 

my "love" life basically involves 3 guys now, and just cause i think there is a chance they might see this there is gonna be guy A B and C. and i guess to fully understand my life ill have to go into the background.

 

ok, the first guy, guy A, ive known him just about going on 7 years now. we've always been friends for the most part, i mean ive known him since jr high. and we've danced around various topics. i mean i never really had liked him growing up... we were friends, and i was cool with that. my friends swore we were in love and just to get a laugh or two i played into that and he did as well. however, i never really thought much into it until a year or two ago. for some odd reason i just started to like him more than a friend, which happens. sadly though, we did drift apart and i mean now we're friends and all, but not as much as we were by far. i guess it could be cause of the whole you're not gonna miss anything till its gone notion. but thats besides the point. i tried to do the right thing again, a year or two ago and opened up the lines of communication, so to speak. so since then we've been friends and as i had said, not nearly as close. now then, this is fine and dandy but i really started to like him. i was even so bold as to ask him to hang out rathe recently, which didnt go as well as i had hoped... it was rather awkward to be frank- first time in 7years just me and him decided to hang out. anyway, i overheard him saying that he was going to be moving next year and thought to myself that i couldnt let things end like that so i blatantly told him, about a week ago that i have basically adored him for the longest time- we havent really spoken since then.

 

as if this were my only problem, i should be so lucky. guy B; however, is my boyfriend of over a year. and honestly i must say that i do love my boyfriend and i never wanted to be basically this person that ive become. but its just that sometimes... or most of the time he basically just treats me like a friend, with benefits... although due to the way he treats me... he doesnt get the benefits anymore. i mean to be frank, he doesnt do much or take this relationship seriously and no, i dont know why i love him then.

 

but wait- theres more. guy c. guy c and i have been really good friends for about a year. he always listens and cares about what i say when its just me and him talking, which ismore than guy a or b has ever done. and again, even if its just talking online he always thanks me anytime ive helped him and all that and says im such a good person etc. which i mean, i like flattery. plus i mean hes absolutely gorgeous. the only problem with him is that when i see him around campus, if he is with someone he either ignores me or acts completely different. and i mean its not just me, my friends constantly ask me if like we had gotten into a fight or something cause he acts so different. i was told hes just nice to me cause i do favors for him but i mean he is the only person that actually listens to me if i have a problem so i think its more than a fair trade, so to speak. hes just not a consistant person...we talk great by ourselves but in public its different... he's stood me up once and after i told him i had gotten a great birthday gift... i find that he had a party and guess who was not there... yup... me.

 

so yes as we can see this is rather in depth. and i know its my stupid problems but like this is now all i can think about- i cant concentrate on schooljunk or work. so please if someone could honestly guide me in what i should do or even what they would do, it would be much appreciated.

[fiatflux]

you are one mixed up gal. I think you need to forget guys A and C and focus on what you are going to do in your relationship with guy B. You are obviously not happy with the relationship with guy B for the reasons you stated and also because you are looking to hook up with two other guys at the same time. I suggest you start the process of breaking up w/guy B since he is not meeting your needs. You may find that this will give guy B (and yourself) a wake up call and you can start working on improving your relationship (or breaking up if there is no hope).

 

as to guys A and C - they both seem to be sending you clear messages that they aren't interested in taking the relationship to the next level. So, if you do break up with guy B ... you're likely to end up being alone for awhile, which ain't such a bad thing when one is trying to find oneself.