TaraMaiden Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Yeah. Box it all up and drop it off. Literally...... She is so playing her schytt right now.... Hopefully, her doorway is exposed to the elements. Box it up. send her a text. Just, very simply, "Will drop your stuff off tonite". leave it at that. If she texts back and protests, tell her "Not my problem." Box it up, drive over, offload, leave. Done. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 Yeah. Box it all up and drop it off. Literally...... She is so playing her schytt right now.... Hopefully, her doorway is exposed to the elements. Box it up. send her a text. Just, very simply, "Will drop your stuff off tonite". leave it at that. If she texts back and protests, tell her "Not my problem." Box it up, drive over, offload, leave. Done. so break NC just to tell her that? or should i box/bag it up and just leave it in the garage and she can come pick up when ready? Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 This cannot be classified as breaking NC. Sometimes messages of this kind are necessary. They're impersonal, non-discursive and have an objective. Bag/box it up, send her the text, do it then leave it be. Don't pander to her by doing everything by her rules. It's outrageous!! Man up and take control, ok?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 This cannot be classified as breaking NC. Sometimes messages of this kind are necessary. They're impersonal, non-discursive and have an objective. Bag/box it up, send her the text, do it then leave it be. Don't pander to her by doing everything by her rules. It's outrageous!! Man up and take control, ok?? i gotcha, just dont feel like doing all the work, packing her ***** & driving down to her dad's house, to make it easy for her, i feel she should have to sort through all her ****, but it is what it is. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Oh, don't be neat about it. Dump it all into black bin-liner bags.... She's treated you like trash. See how she likes it....... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 Oh, don't be neat about it. Dump it all into black bin-liner bags.... She's treated you like trash. See how she likes it....... amen, thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 (edited) so i said "will drop it off at your dads tonight, make sure someone is there" she texted me back first saying "uh..all my stuff?" ( i didnt reply) "my computer desk and everything?" ( i didnt reply ) " i dont know if anyone will be home, ill ask my dad if he will be here" ( i didnt reply) "Rush Much?" (I didnt reply) " Um hello? You need to communicate with me and tell me if your bringing all my stuff and what time so i can see if my dad will stay home and wait for you" so i then replied "It will be there tonight prob around 9". she replied " thats not going to work, my dad will be pissed if you come that late. whats the problem with me coming up there tomorrow or monday to pick it up" i replied "not my problem" she then replied "why are you being an *******? we're f**cking adults..i dont know why we cant get along after being w each other so long. I didnt f**ck the relationship up." "you cant even communicate with me" i havent replied.. so? keep it N/C from here? she has had weeks and plenty of time and opprotunity to figure out what she wanted to do (& atleast get her stuff).. also kinda funny, hasnt mentioned why SHE cant be there...(got a hot date?) it hurts Edited June 8, 2013 by LifeGoesOnMan Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Yup. No Contact. Drop it off as promised. Stop, heave, drop, leave. I love the way she didn't f*** up this relationship.... ORLY?? Takes 2 to tango, baby!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 Yup. No Contact. Drop it off as promised. Stop, heave, drop, leave. I love the way she didn't f*** up this relationship.... ORLY?? Takes 2 to tango, baby!! lol i find it funny because she had planned not one, but TWO* seperate days to pick up her **** and didnt, left half her **** and wrote me a letter the first time, and then had all today to do it but didnt because she was "so busy", (was also OFF from work the past 3 DAYS and i wasnt even home!) and she says we cant communicate but she was the one who had to "leave" and needed space and ran away from the problems when i pleaded her to stay so we can try and work on things (this was a 7 year relationship after all)..but im the one who cant communicate. also says we are "f*cking adults" but im sure you have been out partying the last 2 weeks away, while all your **** sat at my house while i wondered wtf was going on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 now this is getting interesting, she then replies "You know, a part of me was regretting my decision..but with the way you're acting justifies my decision at this point" I then replied "You where suppose to pick up your stuff the first time and you where suppose to do it today, you also had the last 3 days off." she replied "mhm i have been sick. i had no voice and you should know that. ive also been dealing w alot of **** and car insurance companies. I dont need to explain myself to you" "I know your going to f*ck up my **** and probably not get it all so i'd rather get it myself. What are you going to do leave my sh*t on the lawn like an *******. There is no reason for you to be acting like this" I replied " I am not going to ruin any of your stuff or just leave it on the lawn, just make sure someone is there to get it" she replied "How the fxck can i control people in my house?? do you not understand what i am saying when im saying no one will be home??" I replied "then you need to be home to get it, it is your stuff." she replied " You are acting ignorant for no reason." "well im not going to be home" I havent replied...sigh, hate this drama, sounds like someone has a hot date and is more concerned with that then getting her own stuff. B*tch Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Reply. "Again, Not my problem." Then next time she texts, send this back: Text Blocker activated. Your message was not delivered. Further attempts will result in this service being charged to your account. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 she just texted again & said "just dont get why you are making sh*t difficult. Good Job ruining any future relationship between us" her brother then just texted me saying "yo ill get her stuff tomorrow, if you come at 9 at night my dad will f*cking snap and i dont wanna deal with that lol i totalled my car or id get the stuff now" i havent replied. what now? Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Text her brother. "Ok. As long as it is tomorrow. having her stuff around me is too painful. She seems to think this is me being a bastard. I just want her out of my life so I can heal, mend and move on. You sure you'll come tomorrow?" Ignore her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 i pretty much vented to her brother a little bit, and explained myself (because he is my buddy), nothing overly emotional , told him how i felt, and what lead up to this point, and said what you said to say, and as long as he is there tomorrow its fine. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 now i wonder if she actually meant she was "regretting her decision" or if she was just trying to hurt me, then said "good job at ruining at future relationship"... all because i wanted her stuff out after giving her space and time, and 2 different planned days she couldnt get it done... really says something about her character. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 yeah, that was a jab, a barb on her part. When she said 'future relationship' she didn't mean as in 'getting back together'. What she meant was friendship. But she's just being a cow and saying things to hurt. it's childish, and unfortunately we women are good at it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 8, 2013 Author Share Posted June 8, 2013 (edited) yeah, that was a jab, a barb on her part. When she said 'future relationship' she didn't mean as in 'getting back together'. What she meant was friendship. But she's just being a cow and saying things to hurt. it's childish, and unfortunately we women are good at it. as long as its false hope. i do love this girl unfortunately Edited June 8, 2013 by LifeGoesOnMan Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 Yup, it is unfortunate to love someone who has treated you like such sh*t. Still dealing with it myself. The best advice I can give, along those lines, is to constantly remind yourself in a very objective and unemotional way how this person treated you like utter trash. Works every time. Eventually, you will realize that you love what you had (or thought you had) and what it could have been. You don't really love the reality. The reality is pretty dismal, and it becomes a lot more clear as to why moving away from this person who has become such emotional baggage is indeed the only way out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 8, 2013 Share Posted June 8, 2013 as long as its false hope. i do love this girl unfortunately Ever heard the phrase 'true hope'....? No. neither have I. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 9, 2013 Author Share Posted June 9, 2013 Ever heard the phrase 'true hope'....? No. neither have I. Lol I did kinda crumble , figuring she cant hurt me anymore than she already has, (which she really cant) and I gave her one last shot at coming home before I bagged up all her ****, telling her she needs to let me know now if she is really regretting her decision (which she hinted she was) and that I am already in the process of finding a new apartment (with my best friend) and that im moving on with my life once her **** is gone. And said if she doesn't reply that I will take it as a no and it will be what it be. She hasn't replied...ill take that as closure, real NC starts tonight. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted June 9, 2013 Share Posted June 9, 2013 now this is getting interesting, she then replies "You know, a part of me was regretting my decision..but with the way you're acting justifies my decision at this point" Yeah, I LOVE this text. Okay, so a PART of her was regretting her decision. SO FRICKIN WHAT!!! Doesn't change anything. Whether she regrets the decision or not, the decision was made and it wasn't you. This wasn't an admission that she was wrong and wants to come back. It meant she was feeling guilty about how things when down. Now, with your responses, she doesn't have to feel guilty because she believes you're acting like an asshat. Personally, I see it as taking control of your life back from her and she's not handling it well. And you're right. She too sick to come pack her sh*t, but she can't be there to receive it. Uh huh....dude, you know what the deal is. You're doing everything right. Now, back off the communication. Her brother is coming, done deal. No reason to contact her any longer. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 9, 2013 Author Share Posted June 9, 2013 Yup, it is unfortunate to love someone who has treated you like such sh*t. Still dealing with it myself. The best advice I can give, along those lines, is to constantly remind yourself in a very objective and unemotional way how this person treated you like utter trash. Works every time. Eventually, you will realize that you love what you had (or thought you had) and what it could have been. You don't really love the reality. The reality is pretty dismal, and it becomes a lot more clear as to why moving away from this person who has become such emotional baggage is indeed the only way out. Amen to that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 9, 2013 Author Share Posted June 9, 2013 Yeah, I LOVE this text. Okay, so a PART of her was regretting her decision. SO FRICKIN WHAT!!! Doesn't change anything. Whether she regrets the decision or not, the decision was made and it wasn't you. This wasn't an admission that she was wrong and wants to come back. It meant she was feeling guilty about how things when down. Now, with your responses, she doesn't have to feel guilty because she believes you're acting like an asshat. Personally, I see it as taking control of your life back from her and she's not handling it well. And you're right. She too sick to come pack her sh*t, but she can't be there to receive it. Uh huh....dude, you know what the deal is. You're doing everything right. Now, back off the communication. Her brother is coming, done deal. No reason to contact her any longer. Thanks man, I did send one more text basically wishing her luck and if I missed any of her stuff ill get it to her, and that I hope she finds happiness, so unless she comes running back into my arms tomorrow and apologizes profusely, her **** is bagged and ready to go. **** hasn't been easy, but I've done the best I can not to communicate with her, but like I said in another post, ill chalk this up as closure and it will be what it will be. Once the **** is out, she's out of my personal life and I'm starting strict NC just been hard because I've had to communicate with her to get her **** out past couple days and let it get the best of me at some moments...NO MORE Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeGoesOnMan Posted June 9, 2013 Author Share Posted June 9, 2013 Today is the day, her brother should be here in the next couple hours. Lets see if she actually goes through with it this time... According to her brother she has been an emotional mess past week or so, & this will be the official end of a 7 year relationship, so I'm a very curious if she has actually goes through it ... She was my best friend for a long time and I don't think the finality of it has hit her yet.. But we will see today Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 9, 2013 Share Posted June 9, 2013 Try to talk to him as little as possible. You had a good long talk with him yesterday. There's not much more you can add, or discuss. Tell him, if he starts discussing it, "Really dude, I can't add much more to what I said yesterday. I just want to get this over, and go on with my life. She had 7 years of me. Let's just do this, and then maybe I can try to move on...." Just load up his vehicle, thank him, and tell him, "ok. I'm done." Link to post Share on other sites
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