Seems women my age....back in school

[irc333]

....are always going back to college and never have time to date,....usually I see it stated in their profile, "Please understand I work, take care of my kids, and go to college FULL time! So I might be available all the time."

 

Funny, I did the college stick, you know, around the age most people should be going to college, but what's the deal with single women going back to school, and claiming they may not have time to date because of that?

 

So what? Shall we go out with you only when it's convenient to you ??

[runningfar]

....are always going back to college and never have time to date,....usually I see it stated in their profile, "Please understand I work, take care of my kids, and go to college FULL time! So I might be available all the time."

 

Funny, I did the college stick, you know, around the age most people should be going to college, but what's the deal with single women going back to school, and claiming they may not have time to date because of that?

 

So what? Shall we go out with you only when it's convenient to you ??

 

They might word it better but they're trying to improve themselves. is that so hard to understand?

 

I am not sure if I could work full time, be a mother, go to college, and date. but I guess you get lonely. Even the first 3 seems like you wouldn't have time with your kids.

[pcplod]

Oh go on! It's pretty easy to understand. For one reason or another, they missed out the first time around, or they feel they have to update or change their skill-sets. The world is changing all the time and the pace at which it is changing is accelerating all the time. There are very few people nowadays who will finish their working careers doing the same thing they started out on it with. Infact, because of changing demographics, there are few of us who will be able to retire from work at all. There will simply be fewer of us who will be able to save enough to make it viable.

 

For women, the issue is an even more acute one. They have maybe been through marriage before, the childrearing years, and now divorced they realise that they don't have the financial freedom and comfort to be financially independent and they realise that whether they remain single or enter new partnerships, that they are fundamentally better off being financially independent. And it is a simple fact that we men are better off for it as well, notwithstanding the issue of whether it infers a shortage of well-paid jobs, especially for the young as a result. Realise it or not, for better or worse, there is a societal and cultural revolution going on that involves skills and work that you can try to ignore, but it will suck you in whether you do or not.

 

I read a story recently on Fox News about some old GOP farts bemoaning the fact that in something like 40% of American homes now that women are the primary earners. That is a very clear, unambiguous message for not just women, but also men, and that particular genie ain't ever going back into the bottle. This is not a message that is not only being taken on by the current generations of women but one that is being passed onto their daughters and grand-daughters. We all need to get on-message, whether we like the phenomenon or not. Teenage girls and women in their early 20s are now out-qualifying men in nearly all fields of education and study.

 

However, I would say that if you are actually serious about seeking a relationship, then you need to not only make time to create it but to sustain it. It won't sustain itself under it's own momentum. That's what is called crass complacency and is the cause of the corrosion and collapse of many a relationship. However, if a woman wants to go back to college to learn I will not only encourage her but will do my utmost to practically support her. I expect to benefit from it both implicitly and explictly in any event. And as for a relationship, it's not, in my personal opinion, the extent of it that is the key to success, but the quality of it. A good relationship doesn't mean having to live in one another's pocket. Infact, it may well prove detrimental especially if it is your second time around. You don't have to live under the same roof to have a good relationship, although that is firstly and mostly a practical, financial and logistical consideration, not a romantic one. LAT.

Edited June 16, 2013 by pcplod

[xxoo]

Married and single, many women I know have returned to school around 40 to finish up a bachelors degree or pursue a masters. It's fairly common.

 

If she's really wowed by a guy, she'll find the time.

[Els]

So what? Shall we go out with you only when it's convenient to you ??

 

No, you should just move on to the next profile if you find this one unsuitable for you. Whatever happened to live and let live?

[shexy]

If that's an issue for you, just don't contact them. Move on to the women who don't have kids, don't go to school, don't work, don't do anything.

[PogoStick]

Stick to the women with free time who work at the Kwik E Mart.

[Forever Learning]

PCPLOD, that was a very thoughtful post. Well done!

[Forever Learning]

So what? Shall we go out with you only when it's convenient to you ??

 

Does this sound like a bad attitude to you? It does to me!

 

Could it be your attitude is a barrier between you and happiness?

 

IF you are the bitter type, bitter isn't attractive, that's all I'm saying.

[irc333]

Oh go on! It's pretty easy to understand. For one reason or another, they missed out the first time around, or they feel they have to update or change their skill-sets. The world is changing all the time and the pace at which it is changing is accelerating all the time. There are very few people nowadays who will finish their working careers doing the same thing they started out on it with. Infact, because of changing demographics, there are few of us who will be able to retire from work at all. There will simply be fewer of us who will be able to save enough to make it viable.

 

Funny, I'm trying to get to know a woman...probably around my age bracket....I remember talking her and asking her what she did for a living..she said, "I'm retired"

 

I looked at her like she had 2 heads. LOL (As I'm sure the people around me chatting with her were, too).

 

I was like "Retired? How'd you pull that off?" She laughed and said, "I used to work for the state prison system up north"

 

So there's your answer, one of the few jobs (obviously govt.), where you enter THAT specific entity as a secretary or admin asst. only get hired from within to other positions ...moving up the ladder from within.'

 

I had to envy here, because the rest of the group were job hopping as a result of constant layoffs, while she stuck it out...because it's near impossible to get fired from a govt job. lol

[El Brujo]

I read a story recently on Fox News about some old GOP farts bemoaning the fact that in something like 40% of American homes now that women are the primary earners. That is a very clear, unambiguous message for not just women, but also men, and that particular genie ain't ever going back into the bottle.

 

...especially since a lot of men aren't going to put down that bottle of urine-flavored beer, get up off that butt-sprung couch, and stop watching TV any time soon.

[will1988]

....are always going back to college and never have time to date,....usually I see it stated in their profile, "Please understand I work, take care of my kids, and go to college FULL time! So I might be available all the time."

 

Funny, I did the college stick, you know, around the age most people should be going to college, but what's the deal with single women going back to school, and claiming they may not have time to date because of that?

 

So what? Shall we go out with you only when it's convenient to you ??

 

 

I went through the normal 4 years of college too, at the normal age. I did not graduate though. I screwed around too much and had too much fun and got sucked in to too much drama with the ladies... and was involuntarilly foreced out of school for horrible academic standings. I took a year off of school and realized i will have no future with out a degree. So I went back to the local community college for two years and have now been in a program physically at cc but through one of the best public universities in America. The program I am in is specificly for working adults to get their degree. Classes are only offered at night and on saturday. However, I am an engaged male in my mid 20s. Yet, I know personally for me at least, working 40 hours during the week days and then having class 4 weekday nights, that start an hour or two after work 6pm to 7pm (depends on the time of year), and don't end until 10pm (I only get 5 hours of sleep at most on weekday nights so i can get to work early, leave earlier in the afternoon so i can swing by my house let my dog out and get changed before i go to class). Then some professors will have an anywhere from 4 to 8 hour saturday class once or twice a semester (so if you are taking multiple classes that is multiple saturdays that do not exist for you). So when all is said and done your only free time is the one or two week day nights you do not have class, saturday night, and sunday (which I use as home work day... from dawn until late in the afternoon when i go do dinner with my grandparents). Now I am a man, I do have a fiance and a dog... the only real time our schedules mesh is saturday afternoon and friday night. I immagine that a single woman, especially one that is a single parent and or older than myself (I am on the younger side of the students in this program... most are in their mid 30s to earl 50s) that works full time and has the same course load has a lot less free time, because they have to take care of their kids. I know a woman who is 36, very attractive, single mother of 2, who has no free time because of school, work and kids. We are friends, so she was telling me how she wants to date this guy from her office, but she just does not have time to do anything besides lunch time dates.

[BustedUpInside]

Oh go on! It's pretty easy to understand. For one reason or another, they missed out the first time around, or they feel they have to update or change their skill-sets. The world is changing all the time and the pace at which it is changing is accelerating all the time. There are very few people nowadays who will finish their working careers doing the same thing they started out on it with. Infact, because of changing demographics, there are few of us who will be able to retire from work at all. There will simply be fewer of us who will be able to save enough to make it viable.

 

For women, the issue is an even more acute one. They have maybe been through marriage before, the childrearing years, and now divorced they realise that they don't have the financial freedom and comfort to be financially independent and they realise that whether they remain single or enter new partnerships, that they are fundamentally better off being financially independent. And it is a simple fact that we men are better off for it as well, notwithstanding the issue of whether it infers a shortage of well-paid jobs, especially for the young as a result. Realise it or not, for better or worse, there is a societal and cultural revolution going on that involves skills and work that you can try to ignore, but it will suck you in whether you do or not.

 

I read a story recently on Fox News about some old GOP farts bemoaning the fact that in something like 40% of American homes now that women are the primary earners. That is a very clear, unambiguous message for not just women, but also men, and that particular genie ain't ever going back into the bottle. This is not a message that is not only being taken on by the current generations of women but one that is being passed onto their daughters and grand-daughters. We all need to get on-message, whether we like the phenomenon or not. Teenage girls and women in their early 20s are now out-qualifying men in nearly all fields of education and study.

 

However, I would say that if you are actually serious about seeking a relationship, then you need to not only make time to create it but to sustain it. It won't sustain itself under it's own momentum. That's what is called crass complacency and is the cause of the corrosion and collapse of many a relationship. However, if a woman wants to go back to college to learn I will not only encourage her but will do my utmost to practically support her. I expect to benefit from it both implicitly and explictly in any event. And as for a relationship, it's not, in my personal opinion, the extent of it that is the key to success, but the quality of it. A good relationship doesn't mean having to live in one another's pocket. Infact, it may well prove detrimental especially if it is your second time around. You don't have to live under the same roof to have a good relationship, although that is firstly and mostly a practical, financial and logistical consideration, not a romantic one. LAT.

 

I wish I could like this 1000 times and then buy you flowers with a note saying "Thank you for being an enlightened human being and you would make any woman a wonderful partner!"

[irc333]

We are friends, so she was telling me how she wants to date this guy from her office, but she just does not have time to do anything besides lunch time dates.

 

Oh yeah...I'm getting sick of seeing dating profiles of these VERY women who actually say, "He needs to understand that I work and go to school full-time"

 

Sure he'll understand....but he'll probably just use you as an FWB or just get frustrated and find someone who doesn't go to night school.

 

There's this one woman, going for her PhD...met her on POF, we talked a bit, but apparently an hour long drive is too long for her.

 

She DID Have some spare time, when she has partial custody of her child....then her ex moved out of state....got anew girlfriend, and the new girlfriend doesn't like kids in their home....so she's now got full custody.

 

So her social and dating life has gone bye-bye.

 

People like that should just wait until they graduate and THEN date. Of course, there's that worry after getting your degree of even getting hired...so until then you're working 7 days a week at a local Chili's waiting on tables.

[Mme. Chaucer]

So what? Shall we go out with you only when it's convenient to you ??

 

Obviously. If she can't make the date with you due to her busy schedule, I guess you're just not going out with her unless you're willing to be flexible.

 

I've asked you this before and I don't think you've ever answered.

 

What's with the constant critiquing of women's online profiles?

[Mme. Chaucer]

People like that should just wait until they graduate and THEN date. Of course, there's that worry after getting your degree of even getting hired...so until then you're working 7 days a week at a local Chili's waiting on tables.

 

No, they should not. They should try to date people who are accepting of the reality of her life and who still want to date her. Maybe those guys are rare, but if that's what she needs, why shouldn't she seek it?

 

Lord knows, YOU don't have to try to date her.

[irc333]

Obviously. If she can't make the date with you due to her busy schedule, I guess you're just not going out with her unless you're willing to be flexible.

 

I've asked you this before and I don't think you've ever answered.

 

What's with the constant critiquing of women's online profiles?

 

Gives people something to talk about.

[pcplod]

Gives people something to talk about.

 

Oh, most profiles presented online are a piece de resistance in terms of crapness and that is only the female ones I am talking about naturally. I am sure that the male ones on average are no better. I put a bit of effort into mine most days, at least when I am feeling mellow towards my fellow man and there is a following wind. But none of them will ever win the Nobel Prize for Literature for either intrigue or inventiveness.

 

At least the ones that have something in them sometimes provide a bit of entertainment. It's the completely blank ones where their height is 0' 0" and they have no colour to their eyes that are, well, a bit disappointing. The profile pics of some sexy looking woman are always quite entertaining when it is quite clear that it is not of them. I always wonder why they've done it and why they picked on that particualr photograph or is it just the first one they came across that they thought would do the job?

 

What I am still looking forward to after all this time is the first female to send me an unsolicited picture of her vajayjay so that I can play up all offended and shocked and tell them I am not that sort of guy. Why should the women have all the fun after all? Besides, in accordance with the spirit of the enterprise, if it isn't their face in the profile pic, it doesn't have to be their vajayjay in the picture either.

 

So, where does this conversation go next?

Edited June 18, 2013 by pcplod

[will1988]

No, they should not. They should try to date people who are accepting of the reality of her life and who still want to date her. Maybe those guys are rare, but if that's what she needs, why shouldn't she seek it?

 

Lord knows, YOU don't have to try to date her.

 

@ Irc333

 

Every middleaged woman I know in my program for working adults to get their BIS degree are professionals. Then again that may be the exception to the rule because I live in the DC area. Most of these women are doing it because they want to move out of middle managment type jobs to go on to more senior jobs. So, no, most of them are not looking at Chilis. They are looking at furthering their careers within the company or gov that they are already in. I'm in a similar boat, except i just started my career a few years ago.

 

@ Chaucer,

 

I actually agree with your statement. They have busy lives. Hell, I'm in a relationship and have a dog... and I'm spread thin by all the school work and work work... I can only imagine how a single mother with kids must feel. I mean every week day I get up between 4:30 and 5... get to work between 6:30-7, leave by 3ish, run home for an hour to shower, change, walk my dog... then on campus at 5:30, class at 6... get out of class around 10pm... get home 30 minutes later. Eat dinner, watch some tv with the fiance, walk my dog and am in bed between 11:30 and 12:30... rince repeat. On some weekends I may have class at 8am until 3pm on saturday. Leaving me only saturday night for real free time, and sunday as home work day. As I said in a past post. Now this is a 25 year old man who has no kids who is doing this... imagine a 40 year old woman with a couple of kids and is single. I need mass amounts of red bull, 5 hour energy shots and ciggs to keep me going throughout my day, and even then i am still exhausted and warn out by the weekend...

 

Any way back on to replying to your post. Yes, I think most of these women... and I'm friends with several, are just too busy to date. When they find a man that they like, and who is also interested in them, they can't commit to the uncertain schedules. So a lot of these women just give up dating until they graduate.

 

If I was a single man and a little older I would not mind dating these women because at least on the scheduling bit I understand how hard it is, for the most part. I know they would probably jump at me too... lol. One of them kind of hinted at it once, but I made sure to mention my fiance a bit. lol. Ah cougars. The problem in these programs is that it seems most of the men are already settled down, and the women are divorce's with kids. If you were a single man in his 30s or 40s and you enrolled in a program like this, you'd have no problem getting a girl friend.

[El Brujo]

Seems like everyone and their grandfather is in college nowadays. Yeah, it can be frustrating to the rest of us... but once they graduate and find out they have to compete against thousands of others who have the same degree, they'll come around.

[irc333]

@ Irc333

 

If you were a single man in his 30s or 40s and you enrolled in a program like this, you'd have no problem getting a girl friend.

 

LOL....yeah....because you're always going to the same classes with these ladies.

 

I knew of a woman, she was divorced...was a housewife all her life, and had FULL custody of her kid (7 year old)...I usually avoid those, because there's not a chance of getting a free weekend at all.

 

She was of a "step-ford wife" quality, but she had no choice but to move her kid in with her parents and herself living with the parents....her job was that she was a housewife, nothing more.

 

She did get a work-at-home medical transcription job, and started to date this one guy, single...no kids....but her situation wore thin on him...he didn't mind the kid or the fact she was going back to school.

 

IT was the fact she was so caught up in her kids SOCIAL life and activities.

 

She was a Cub Scout Den mother, usually volunteered most times to "Ferry" around other parents' children to activities...camp outs, etc.

 

THe straw that broke the camels back was when he attempted to reach some kind of compromise by volunteering bringing his tent to join them in a camp out.

 

She told him she didn't feel it would be right, because her child would get the wrong idea and would be confused.

 

He pretty much threw up his arms, said something off-color (nothing rude, but it was negative).

 

She DID understand his frustration, but she said, "Listen...this seems to not be working with you, so it's best we split ways"

 

He was in agreement, he just got tired of hardly ever seeing her.

[irc333]

If a woman has kids, night school, and works full time.

 

In order to even get a SOCIAL life, much less a dating life...she's going to have to give up one (which probably sounds absurd) OR wait one of these options out.

 

1. Wait till the kids get old enough to wipe their own noses and use a microwave.

2. Wait until you're done with college altogether.

 

 

Work is pretty much a constant here.

 

There's a woman I started talking to that gave up 10 years at a bank to go to school full time.....of course you're asking how she can afford to....basically she moved back in with her parents.

[Maleficent]

....are always going back to college and never have time to date,....usually I see it stated in their profile, "Please understand I work, take care of my kids, and go to college FULL time! So I might be available all the time."

 

Funny, I did the college stick, you know, around the age most people should be going to college, but what's the deal with single women going back to school, and claiming they may not have time to date because of that?

 

So what? Shall we go out with you only when it's convenient to you ??

 

Women get to a point where they spent years living to please someone else (their parents, their boyfriends, society in general) that they just go **** all y'all and do what they want to do.

 

Also, men can be…clingy.

[Maleficent]

Oh yeah...I'm getting sick of seeing dating profiles of these VERY women who actually say, "He needs to understand that I work and go to school full-time"

 

Sure he'll understand....but he'll probably just use you as an FWB or just get frustrated and find someone who doesn't go to night school.

 

There's this one woman, going for her PhD...met her on POF, we talked a bit, but apparently an hour long drive is too long for her.

 

She DID Have some spare time, when she has partial custody of her child....then her ex moved out of state....got anew girlfriend, and the new girlfriend doesn't like kids in their home....so she's now got full custody.

 

So her social and dating life has gone bye-bye.

 

People like that should just wait until they graduate and THEN date. Of course, there's that worry after getting your degree of even getting hired...so until then you're working 7 days a week at a local Chili's waiting on tables.

 

So…she should change her choice of lifestyle to YOUR liking?

Women.don't.owe.you.****.

[Maleficent]

If a woman has kids, night school, and works full time.

 

In order to even get a SOCIAL life, much less a dating life...she's going to have to give up one (which probably sounds absurd) OR wait one of these options out.

 

1. Wait till the kids get old enough to wipe their own noses and use a microwave.

2. Wait until you're done with college altogether.

 

 

Work is pretty much a constant here.

 

There's a woman I started talking to that gave up 10 years at a bank to go to school full time.....of course you're asking how she can afford to....basically she moved back in with her parents.

 

Again with the telling women how they should live their lives...