What do you think of this article?? "Trapping" men into pregnancy

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

It's not socially acceptable. I have never met a single person who would find it so, and though I haven't read this entire thread, I would venture to guess that IB might be the one and only regular member of LS who would consider such a thing.

 

It's immoral, fraudulent, and sleazy to "trap" someone into creating a human life, for God's sake.

 

Creating human lives is not an activity people are supposed to be doing just because they "wanna." Get a doll.

 

I said I would never do it. But if you read the article it's much more acceptable or is done way more than you think

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

Picking a sperm donor is a lot less "random" than potentially getting pregnant by one of the losers you've had sex with in your life so far, who you've barely known. You can learn a lot about the donors.

 

But you don't see if they are hot or not.

Not all the guys I've slept with are losers and I didn't try to get pregnant by them.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Ok I can understand that but men need to be a little more considerate of our biological clock. If I have a decent job and so does he, and we live together and we are happy and I want a baby then dammit it is time to make a baby!

 

When you write inane garbage like this, I cannot believe that you are doing anything more than baiting people on this website. Nobody is like this in real life. I need to believe I'm right about that.

[sillyanswer]

I said I would never do it.

 

You also said that if you were older you probably would consider it, so it's easy to see how people could become, erm, confused about your views on this!

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

You also said that if you were older you probably would consider it, so it's easy to see how people could become, erm, confused about your views on this!

 

But I'm not older. The thing is if I'm 30 and dating someone an we choose to not use protection that's a risk we take. I wouldn't try to trick them but I think by 30 I need to already be married and if in not and I'm seriously dating someone we need to baby make asap

[Eclypse]

But you don't see if they are hot or not.

Not all the guys I've slept with are losers and I didn't try to get pregnant by them.

 

Believe it or not you can see everything about them. It's like going clothes shopping. You know what the men look like, their ethnic backgrounds their education, achievements... everything so you can get the best match you want. Don't want a brown haired baby? Then you can easily pick a blond man to choose sperm from. Of course whether that will actually result in blond hair depends on if they have recessive genes and your own genetic makeup.

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

When you write inane garbage like this, I cannot believe that you are doing anything more than baiting people on this website. Nobody is like this in real life. I need to believe I'm right about that.

 

You can believe that but in the end I am not going to be 30 and baby less so take that however you want.

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

Believe it or not you can see everything about them. It's like going clothes shopping. You know what the men look like, their ethnic backgrounds their education, achievements... everything so you can get the best match you want. Don't want a brown haired baby? Then you can easily pick a blond man to choose sperm from. Of course whether that will actually result in blond hair depends on if they have recessive genes and your own genetic makeup.

 

How impersonal but I mean if I'm 30 and single I would consider it though.

[sillyanswer]

But I'm not older. The thing is if I'm 30 and dating someone an we choose to not use protection that's a risk we take.

 

So long as you're both aware that you're taking that risk, rather than the woman deceiving the man by claiming to be on BC when she isn't, then it's fine to take that risk together.

 

The point was about pregnancy through deception, though. Glad to hear that you're definitely not considering it!

[Mme. Chaucer]

 

And it will ultimately be that "baby" who pays the price.

 

That's what's the most repulsive about this whole thing.

 

I am sickened by the idea that IB, or anybody's desire for something should potentially change the course of another adult's life.

 

But the worst thing of all is that a child would be brought into the world as a result of somebody wanting one like people want a "thing." And to be completely unwanted by its father.

 

I don't really think that the OP gives a crap about the "sperm doner" in her fantasy life, as long as she thinks he would provide "cute babies."

 

Too bad we can't ''trap" people who are clearly unfit for parenthood into involuntary sterilization.

 

Anybody who wants a baby because it would be so cute and they just wanna have it, like a new purse or a hamster, should not have a baby.

 

It's a freaking future sentient human being. Not a cute "thing."

 

:sick::sick::sick::sick::sick:

[William]

Some posters have apparently decided to make the topic about something other than an article shared by the thread starter. Do you really want moderation to step in here? Why not discuss the article, or move on? Thanks.

 

I'll edit to add that any member who mocks moderation will have their membership terminated. There's no place for that kind of behavior in the social climate we wish to promote on our forums. Harsh? Yep, it is. Follow our guidelines and address the topic.

Edited June 17, 2013 by William

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

That's what's the most repulsive about this whole thing.

 

I am sickened by the idea that IB, or anybody's desire for something should potentially change the course of another adult's life.

 

But the worst thing of all is that a child would be brought into the world as a result of somebody wanting one like people want a "thing." And to be completely unwanted by its father.

 

I don't really think that the OP gives a crap about the "sperm doner" in her fantasy life, as long as she thinks he would provide "cute babies."

 

Too bad we can't ''trap" people who are clearly unfit for parenthood into involuntary sterilization.

 

Anybody who wants a baby because it would be so cute and they just wanna have it, like a new purse or a hamster, should not have a baby.

 

It's a freaking future sentient human being. Not a cute "thing."

 

:sick::sick::sick::sick::sick:

 

Babies are adorable but obviously that isn't the reason I want one, you've read a ton of my threads skimmed and I'm sure you pick up on the fact that I hate being alone all the time. That's part of the reason I have also said a ton that ideally I would be married when I get pregnant or in a serious relationship because I like the idea of a family. I want my children to be raised in a good together family like I was, I don't want to be 99 years old still looking for a guy to have babies with (and 99 is 35 to me in that sense).

[amaysngrace]

Glad to hear that you're definitely not considering it!

 

How can you say she's not considering it when she sought out an article and starts a thread about doing it?

 

It's on her mind this much.

 

And yes IB I should have checked to see that he actually had one on the second go around but if I recall correctly when I shared this story before with you on an abortion thread you sympathized with me because I chose not to go that route.

 

Now as you're thinking of acting as badly as my exH you are back to blaming me as if this were only my fault and his bad actions of deceit had nothing at all to do with it.

 

Whatever.

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

Anyways back to the point, the whole reason I posted it is because obviously it happens and from the women in the story sometimes it works out sometimes it doesn't. I know tons of guys who didnt want to be parents their girlfriend got pregnant somehow and they stayed and are a happy family so to me I'm like hey good idea... Not the tricking them part but if I have sex with the new guy I'm dating and he forgets a condom I told him a while ago I suck at taking bc (even though I have been good lately) and it happens then its both of our faults

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

How can you say she's not considering it when she sought out an article and starts a thread about doing it?

 

It's on her mind this much.

 

And yes IB I should have checked to see that he actually had one on the second go around but if I recall correctly when I shared this story before with you on an abortion thread you sympathized with me because I chose not to go that route.

 

Now as you're thinking of acting as badly as my exH you are back to blaming me as if this were only my fault and his bad actions of deceit had nothing at all to do with it.

 

Whatever.

I thought it was good that you didn't have an abortion and that is good, plan b isn't abortion. You also didn't give all the details that would prove that you were just as much at fault.

[serial muse]

I'll comment on the article too. It's in Details mag, a magazine aimed at young men, and it's on a very hot sensational topic, contains lots of anecdotes and "imagine this" scenarios, and no real data. The closest the entire article gets to citing anything is this:

 

"Just how many women act on that presumption is hard to say. According to FDA figures, one in a thousand of them should get pregnant over the course of a year if they're using the Pill exactly as prescribed. But it is estimated that in reality 50 times that many get pregnant."

 

Re: the bold - by whom, I wonder?

 

Anyway. No doubt women do this, and it's disgusting. I am not at all saying that it doesn't happen or that it doesn't suck or that it is in any way OK.

 

But I DO NOT think it is considered socially acceptable, and I wonder how common it really is. We certainly don't have any idea from this article. We all know that IiB is an outlier here and is desperate for a family, and even she says she wouldn't do it. So my point is that this article did exactly what it was intended to do: rile people up a bit and get them to read Details magazine. Job well done.

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

A premeditated, happy "accident"...

 

It happens all the time. Didn't someone post that 50% of pregnancies are unplanned?

[Els]

Anyways back to the point, the whole reason I posted it is because obviously it happens and from the women in the story sometimes it works out sometimes it doesn't. I know tons of guys who didnt want to be parents their girlfriend got pregnant somehow and they stayed and are a happy family so to me I'm like hey good idea...

 

I think the question in your OP has been answered quite extensively - most of us think that 'trapping' someone into pregnancy is a counterproductive and useless act at best, and a heinous, despicable, horrible thing to do at worst.

[amaysngrace]

I thought it was good that you didn't have an abortion and that is good, plan b isn't abortion. You also didn't give all the details that would prove that you were just as much at fault.

 

It happened the way that it happened and I did not change, omit or say anything differently than I said here.

 

It is you who has chosen to see it differently now.

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

It happened the way that it happened and I did not change, omit or say anything differently than I said here.

 

It is you who has chosen to see it differently now.

 

Oh well I see it differently I guess.

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

That is a pretty lame excuse to get what you want.

 

It is reality not an excuse.

Anyways I didn't say I would do it I said if this happen then...

I'm new with the guy I'm with and I'm not going to mess up all our fun plans

[Keenly]

But I'm not older. The thing is if I'm 30 and dating someone an we choose to not use protection that's a risk we take. I wouldn't try to trick them but I think by 30 I need to already be married and if in not and I'm seriously dating someone we need to baby make asap

 

 

 

You do not get to choose when you have a baby on your own. It doesn't work like that . If you do, the father will bail and RIGHTFULLY SO. Too freaking bad that you want a baby. Deal with it.

 

 

 

If a man wants a baby he can just rape any woman he wants right ? Let's use your logic here. I can rape a woman and keep her chained in the basement for 9 months and it should be totally legal, because after all, I WANT A BABY NOW!

Edited June 17, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Civility and respect

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

You do not get to choose when you have a baby on your own. It doesn't work like that . If you do, the father will bail and RIGHTFULLY SO. Too freaking bad that you want a baby. Deal with it.

 

 

 

If a man wants a baby he can just rape any woman he wants right ? Let's use your logic here. I can rape a woman and keep her chained in the basement for 9 months and it should be totally legal, because after all, I WANT A BABY NOW!

 

I don't think I should be punished for having 15 good years of eggs left, by someone who can produce sperm until they are 110. Just doesn't seem right. Like I said I wouldn't do it, but I'm saying the women in the story I could see their point.

Edited June 17, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Edited quote and response

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

Ok, so does that mean that men can start refusing to pay child support based on the fact that they told her they didnt' want kids, and when she said she was pregnant he suggested and wanted an abortion?

If she doesn't want that, then he should get to opt out just as much as she is allowed to make him "opt in" by doing this.

It SHOULDN'T be both ways.

 

It shouldn't be allowed that a woman can let her herself or premeditate getting herself knocked up and then require him to pay her for it for the next 18+ years. It just shoudln't be ok.

 

 

It can be. There are many people out there that causing an unwanted pregnancy could put their life at risk. I would have to stop taking meds that I need. For some people pregnancy can cause stroke or heart failure.

 

 

Really? That's your concern? That he be "hot" enough?

That's very... disturbing.

 

I mean when i am looking for someone to date I need to be reasonably attracted to them, and I date to find someone to marry and have babies with so if I choose to go at it alone and use a sperm bank then I would have the same criteria for them as I would a man I would date. I can't see myself going to a sperm bank it seems like the type of people who go in there would be weird.

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

By 110 you mean 38.9 since 99 in IB years is 35 in human years?

 

Lol well no, men age differently. Men can reproduce until they die basically is what I meant.