randymac Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 Why is it that women can deal with a break up of a marriage better than a man? I have to give women credit for the ability to realize a situation for what it's worth and regardless how much it hurts or who's at fault, be able to move on better than a man. I know that people say that they are more emotional than men but I'm about as feeling as it gets and it hurts like hell and it is very hard to move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 Because most times the woman has already left the relationship emotionally. Once the mechanics are sorted out it takes less time for a woman to adapt to the new situation. Most women have a high tolerance and a lot of patience when it comes to relationships so by the time it's over, it's actually been over months before. The women just took longer to actually accept that it's over. My general opinion on the topic... Link to post Share on other sites
aFighter Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 How do you answer this without offending someone? I've been burned so anything I say about this is gonna have a negative turn on it. So i'll just keep my opinion to myself. Link to post Share on other sites
gersanos Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 I concur. By the time the relationship ends, a woman has left emotionally already. Now she is just finishing it by removing herself physically from the picture. A man may continue to cling to his emotions, and continue the cycle that she is going to come back. And when she hasn't called yet, the guy continues to wallow until a certain point. So men I guess can prolong the grieving process by not accepting it, and living with false hopes if he was dumped. I guess it would work the same way if man dumped woman. Either way, women can move on easier because guys will always go up and talk to them and any self-esteem or confidence issues will be resolved fairly quickly, whereas men may have shattered self-esteem afterwards and find it difficult to approach another woman for the fear of rejection that is carried over from the last relationship. The healing process in this sense to get back in the game is more difficult for men. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 Hmmm... My Opinion is this... When you are the one who ends the relationship (regardless of gender) then I think it is easier to move on, then when you are the person who's been let go of... I really don't believe any relationship just ends "suddenly" without warning. It may have taken time for a man or a woman to reach that decision and then to actually follow through with it... but I think it was a decision that they made over time, and eventually ended it. Of course it will be "easier" for the person who broke it off to come to terms with and move on.... as they saw it coming for a long time, and took steps to detach. My opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
gersanos Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 Merin2, I agree with you. I have considered ending things suddenly before, but I didn't and was grateful that I didn't at the time because it was out of negative emotion and I would have regreted it. It is a decision that occurs over time. I have a friend right now that is at that point. He he thinking about breaking up with his gf of 1.5 years because he thinks that she is not the one for him. He has thought about it for a while already, but just hasnt acted on it. Out of sympathy, I told him to jump on it asap because she has no idea and will be crushed, but he said he isn't certain yet but has been thinking about it. Quick quesion off topic here, when people withdraw emotionally and end it, is it ever really forever? I always say it is whenever I break up with someone, regardless of whos breaking up with who. But down the road, months to years, we somehow manage to have that lovin' feeling again. Granted these are usually relationships that were couple months long, and not long-term. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 Originally posted by gersanos Quick quesion off topic here, when people withdraw emotionally and end it, is it ever really forever? I always say it is whenever I break up with someone, regardless of whos breaking up with who. But down the road, months to years, we somehow manage to have that lovin' feeling again. Granted these are usually relationships that were couple months long, and not long-term. I think it depends on a lot of factors... What the real reason(s) were for the break up If the relationship ended not really because one or both people wanted it to, but more because at the time, it wasn't working (LOL I guess that goes back to a factor) I Myself have been in a relationship that I've found it extremly difficult to leave... I really Love this person, but had to make a decision to let go of it even though I didn't want to, because simply.. it wasn't good for me emotionally. (Think Ushers Burn... ugh!) On the other hand, I had a long long looonngg term relationship and when I ended it, it was and is forever. To much had happened, and I just really feel nothing for him. Link to post Share on other sites
bluetuesday Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 it totally depends on the emotional resources of the individual. i howl for a week and then i'm over it. i don't have the capacity to either hold a grudge or to pine for someone who doesn't want me. life's too precious. Link to post Share on other sites
DESI Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 I think it also depends on the individual, and who broke up with who. I have a hard tome letting go and moving on, even when I am the one who did the break up. This is probably because even when I did the breaking up in the past it has been because of cheating, which really gave me no choice but to break up with him. I was just thinking about this the other day, and I think it is the other way around. I think men move on easier then women, maybe they just hide it better, and show it differently. Link to post Share on other sites
faux Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 In nearly all species, the female is often the most vicious. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted October 13, 2004 Share Posted October 13, 2004 Originally posted by faux In nearly all species, the female is often the most vicious. Great, now I'm thinking of black widows! Link to post Share on other sites
Bender donetat Posted October 14, 2004 Share Posted October 14, 2004 its sad but true..... women can open their legs and 1000 guys will come rushing in at any time.... guys can drop their pants and youll never see a women ready to just jump on it..... Point.... Women may not be "over it" as much as people want to believe they just find replacement parts faster.... Link to post Share on other sites
NatoPMT Posted October 14, 2004 Share Posted October 14, 2004 By the time the relationship ends, a woman has left emotionally already Rubbish. Totally depends on the situation Either way, women can move on easier because guys will always go up and talk to them and any self-esteem or confidence issues will be resolved fairly quickly, whereas men may have shattered self-esteem afterwards and find it difficult to approach another woman for the fear of rejection This I agree with as potentially part of the reason why women may move on moreb quickly I think some of that is that in general, many women have a better support system and are able to work through negative thoughts and externalise them. Men also have more linear thinking than women – if they believe the one they were with was the right one, they stay in this pattern of thought for longer. Quick quesion off topic here, when people withdraw emotionally and end it, is it ever really forever For me, yes. If I have ended a relationship and I know its ended, I have never been able to resurrect feelings again. I have never wanted to be close to that person again, but then I have never ended anything without it running completely past its course. I have never felt a physical attraction to someone I have ended things with, if I was still physically attracted to the person then possibly… i howl for a week and then i'm over it. i don't have the capacity to either hold a grudge or to pine for someone who doesn't want me. life's too precious well said that girl. I wail and throw myself on the floor in v undignified fashion and generally make an idiot of myself for a shortest time possible, my last one was the exception that taught me the exception was an exception and I will NEVER do that again. Promise. BB Link to post Share on other sites
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