Tips for dressing my overweight boyfriend (buying pants..)

[dressinghim]

My boyfriend is overweight and his pants don't fit him right. He gets them too small in the waist and his belly hangs over. He's been trying to diet, but I just want to buy him pants that fit properly, Now. He tells me his pant size is 40 or 42 x 30 or 32. But I think that is a bit small. I'm going to buy him 44x32. I noticed his belt is a size 46 though, and I read on askmen that you should buy pants and belt in the same size. Could he be actually supposed to wear a 46?

 

He's about 5'11" or 6' feet tall, probably about 230 pounds, and I think that he wears a 30L just because he wears the smaller waist size so they ride low on his waist. He doesn't look very professional at all when he's dressed for work. When he wears his tie, it stops about 4 inches above his belt. It's kind of embarrassing because, while no fashion diva, I do have taste. I saw that his father wore his tie the same way when I met him. He lacks in this area, but I love him to pieces. I want to buy him a pair of shoes (he always wears sneakers! eek) and a pair of pants. But I have to charge it because I'm unemployed, and therefore Cheap is a big consideration, but I do not want to sacrifice much on quality. I'm checking out places like Marshall's or Ross.

 

He only owns about 3 pairs of pants and has a million shirts that are fine, so I need some basic colors. I'm thinking khaki or tan colors.

 

Basically my question is for the guys who have or have had big bellys. What are your dressing tips? Should I buy him pants with a pleat in front? Any particular needs in the area of pants - like the cut of the leg? I don't know much at all about men's pants. In women's we have straight-leg, flared, tapered, etc, and I'm not sure what all exists in the men's department. Any ideas about dealing with the tie issue without offending him? Any tips whatever would be great.

[dressinghim]

Okay, well no one responded! I've been trying to find some big bellied guys walking along down the street so I could check and see how they wear their pants. Weird, when I was looking, every man was slender. I saw one big belly and his pants were below the belly!

 

I'm wondering if it would look funny if I forced him to wear his pants higher, around his middle. I'm concerned it would make him look fatter, or make it look dumpy around the crotch. I found some tips online saying that men, no matter the size of their belly, should wear their pants around the waist - just below the belly button. A lot of men don't do that, huh?

 

Anyway, I bought him 2 pairs of pants, one is sized 44x30 and one is sized 46x30. I read somewhere that on bigger guys, a shorter pant leg is sometimes desirable. We'll see how he reacts/how they look tonight when he gets in. I'm just going to pretend I thought he said 44 or 46 in the waist, maybe, not sure. Oh, I also bought him a pair of black dressy shoes with a squared off toe - kind of trendy Sketcher shoe.

 

Anyone have anything to say or am I talking to myself?

[Naive]

Maybe there are no real guys on here that are that size and that's why they have not replied.

 

Why do you want to change his style? If that's the way he's always dresses don't try to change him just give him advice.

[dressinghim]

I'm not trying to change his style He doesn't buy clothes - he just gets clothes as presents. He doesn't really have a "style" per se. That's the thing, I could give him advice all I want but what he needs is new pants and shoes - and he knows that and has said so - but he doesn't buy clothes unless they are absolutely mandatory. And right now he's struggling with paying for other things and his birthday just passed and he got only shirts for clothes. And he just started the south beach diet again so he'd probably especially not want to spend money on pants that were larger. So he needs, you see. I just want to get him the right stuff.

[tiki]

I say let him wear the pants below his belly. If not, he will look like Humpty Dumpty. Some stores specialize in Big and Tall. Check into that.

[netrie]

LOL. Bless your heart!

[Sukotto]

Those with larger bellies generally wear their trousers under it. Anything else will emphasise the weight.

 

I'm around a 33" waste and used to wear 34" trousers but I know they look silly cause they go over my belly and I have to wear a belt, my more recent purchases are 32" and even though they seem a bit tight I feel they look better compared to the larger size.

[Stone]

Take him on a shopping spree. Like Tiki said the big and tall stores are great and it will make him feel good, but if you want to change the way he dresses I am sorry to say you should pay the bill.. Also look at shirts as well, there are really nice dress shirts that go over the base of the pants so his belly won't be exposed. Tommy Bahamma has nice shirts and they make big guys look not so big.

[Stone]

Oversized dress sweaters are always nice. and they come with a V neck What style are you looking for?

 

I was just browsing some mens big and tall sites and George Foreman has a new line of clothes out and their pants are really cool and run about $47.00... What the heck doesn't he sell?

 

Hope this helps

[Girlie]

dressinghim - as far as the tie issue goes, I think you have two choices. Either get him a tie, or just don't worry about it. I wish I had some better advice, but I can't really think of a way to approach him about that. He doesn't sound like the type that really cares all that much about what he puts on, so I'm not sure he's all that concerned about how it looks, you know? That's just a guess on my part, not knowing more. I guess if you feel comfortable enough with it, just tell him the ties are too short. Or something like, "You should wear your ties a bit longer...it would look more professional." I don't know. I typically keep my mouth shut about stuff my bf wears. For instance, I hate hi-tops. I think they're just hideous shoes. But he wears them and well, oh well. If that's what he wants to wear, and if he likes 'em, ok.

Anyway, good luck. It's very sweet of you to buy your bf clothes. Esp. if his don't really fit.

[Stone]

I tell my b/f when he dresses like crap all the time. I guess I am just rude. but he puts something weird or ugly on and I am like " Where do you think you are going because I will not go out with you like that" I think that if it bothers you, he should consider changing his appearance even if it is simply to buy larger pants.

[Girlie]

lol - stoneheather. No, it's not rude. That actually reminds me of my grandmother. My grandpa would try to leave for the store or something, and she'd come stomping out and be like, "Bob! Where are you going in those rags?!" If she wouldn't have dressed him, he probably would have been mistaken for a local whino or something half of the time. lol. I always thought it was terribly cute.

[Stone]

Hey just proves my point when men grow up they still need mothers... LOL

[dressinghim]

Thanks all! Stoneheather, I really hadn't thought much about the sweater thing. Actually, I said he doesn't really have a style, but if I had to guess his style, I would say sweaters would not be part of it. He'd wear only t-shirts and cargo pants if he could. But that's a good idea.. recently I convinced him to tuck in his shirt (a polo-type shirt made to be tucked..) and he did it but it did accentuate the problem of his pants being too low and his belly pretty big. It looked better than it hanging down though. His everyday work outfit is a collared-shirt not tucked in, baggy pants that must constrict him in the waist (he has to suck it in to unbutton his pants!), and sneakers.

 

Anyway, you all might be right, like Sukotto says, maybe the pants I got him will be too big for his groove thang. We'll see. If he tries them on and really doesn't like it, and I agree/can't convince him otherwise, I have no problem exchanging them for a smaller size. Want him to wear the clothes!

 

Oh, and Girlie, I DID buy him a tie. So far he hasn't worn it. I'm pretty sure he'd tie it the same way - he seems to just think that's how a person wears a tie? I have a plan though: When growing up, my dad could never/would never tie his own ties and my mother always did it for him. So on his tie rack, all his ties were pre-tied and all my dad had to do was wrap it around his neck and tighten it. So I'm planning to learn how to tie ties and do that for him once he moves in here in a couple of weeks.

 

I will probably definately restrict his wardrobe eventually since he has no desire to care about clothes(we're engaged) but first I need to get him a wardrobe! He always says he trusts my taste about things, and he likes the stuff I've gotten him in the past. I'm not about to make him walk around looking stupid because his clothes don't fit right or he's wearing something totally not him.

 

Who else dresses their boyfriends around here?

[dressinghim]

The 44" waist pair fit him good, when worn at his waist just under his belly button. It did not look dumpy, it made him look trimmer. I could not get him to even try on the 46" pair, but that's okay. We ended up having a bit of a battle over "what is the man's waistline" in which I pulled out the clothing ads from the sunday paper and said, "at the waist! at the waist! at the waist!" and proved that men in catalogs do not sag their pants and all wear their pants where I said they do. It didn't really go over very well, I'm ashamed to say, but he said that nobody wore their pants that way so I proved it. That could've gone better! I can really see how I went about that wrong, but I wasn't getting any results so I probably took it a little too far. But we kissed n made up. I said I just thought it looked nice on him that way, no matter where other people wear their pants and he said he's going to try to wear them that way even though he doubts its comfortable and he says they'll probably just slip down to his comfy spot and I say okay then.

 

When he wears them at the waist I think it looks nicer - he looks thinner and the crotch doesn't look dumpy after all! the 44" size is just fine if it's worn there; the bottom of the pants hangs well about his shoes. And the shoes are acceptable, too. I think he looks quite handsome in the pants with the shoes. He feels like a tool. But I think I more than made my point so I'm just going to shut up about pants for quite awhile.

[SoleMate]

Have you tried some of the better used or consignment clothing stores? You can find REALLY good prices. And yes, the pants should be at the waist.

 

Here are some resources:

 

http://www.menshealth.com/cda/article/printer_friendly/0,2826,s1-7-45-0-848,00.html

 

http://www.q.co.za/2003/07/0707_campclothes.htm

 

http://www.askmen.com/fashion/fashiontip/32b_fashion_advice.html

 

They all agree about "pants at the waistline". Everyone says that the belly must not be allowed to hang over.

 

BTW, your post made me laugh so hard I started hyperventilating and making a shrill involuntary sound. "Forcing him to wear pants...looking dumpy around the crotch..."

[dressinghim]

Hey thanks SoleMate, one of those links though says that "portly" men should wear pants at the hips. :-/ Well, he's not "portly" i guess.

 

Today he's wearing the new pants close to his waist and the shoes and he told me he's gotten compliments on several occassions already, and that he likes the look. So it seems like he's pretty happy with it so I'm happy, too.

[Stone]

I am glad you guys are working it out, I dress my man and he knows better than to go out of the house with me looking like crap, If I have to put on make up for 20 minutes he can spend 2 finding an outfit that is appealing \

 

But at times when he wants to feel comfortable and watch a game or something I throw on a ball cap and am comfy right there with him and he likes it so it works both ways.