mixedemoticon Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 (edited) I hope I am posting this in the right place. I suspect my boyfriend is sleeping with one of his ex-girlfriends. I saw a suspicious text a couple weeks ago and was really mad. At that point my BF told this other woman to block me from her fb (which she did)...and he blocked me too because I snoop too much apparently. I dont about you, but wouldnt you at least check out the person's fb that you are blocking BEFORE you block it? Irrespective of the reason my BF gave her to block me, isnt this something one would do? Secondly, I wanted to call this other woman up and find out what the story was with her and my BF, as he claims they are just old friends. He does occasionally speak to her on the phone when I am there. And she does call him late at night even though he doesnt answer. I got her number from his phone, but never ever called her (to avoid any arguments etc). A month goes by and suddenly the other woman tells my BF that two different people have called her from blocked numbers telling her to leave him alone because he has a girlfriend. Now my BF assumed it was me behind the calls because nobody else "could have had access to her number that also knows you". I denied doing anything, but he called me a liar and broke up with me. I cant understand why he believes her word over mine. My gut feeling is that somehow she became suspicious of my BF being in a relationship with someone besides her or saw our pics on FB and made up the calls as an excuse to confront him about me. My bf likely denied having a girlfriend and she bought his stories. So she STILL doesnt know about me (at least I dont think so). Wouldnt you, as this "other woman" ever become suspicious and investigate? But even though I was NOT behind those supposed calls, I still want her to know about me. But I dont know how to "engineer" this without it being traced back to me in ANY way. But I cant think how. Any suggestions pleeeeez?? Thank you. Edited June 22, 2013 by mixedemoticon Link to post Share on other sites
JustAReformedGirl Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 I hope I am posting this in the right place. I suspect my boyfriend is sleeping with one of his ex-girlfriends. I saw a suspicious text a couple weeks ago and was really mad. At that point my BF told this other woman to block me from her fb (which she did)...and he blocked me too because I snoop too much apparently. I dont about you, but wouldnt you at least check out the person's fb that you are blocking BEFORE you block it? Irrespective of the reason my BF gave her to block me, isnt this something one would do? Secondly, I wanted to call this other woman up and find out what the story was with her and my BF, as he claims they are just old friends. I got her number from his phone, but never ever called her (to avoid any arguments etc). A month goes by and suddenly the other woman tells my BF that two different people have called her from blocked numbers telling her to leave him alone because he has a girlfriend. Now my BF assumed it was me behind the calls because nobody else "could have had access to her number that knows you". I denied doing anything, but he called me a liar and broke up with me. I cant understand why he believes her word over mine. My gut feeling is that somehow she became suspicious of my BF being in a relationship with someone besides her or saw our pics on FB and made up the calls as an excuse to confront him about me. My bf likely denied having a girlfriend and she bought his stories. So she STILL doesnt know about me (at least I dont think so). Wouldnt you, as this "other woman" ever become suspicious and investigate? But even though I was NOT behind those supposed calls, I still want her to know about me. But I dont know how to "engineer" this without it being traced back to me in ANY way. But I cant think how. Any suggestions pleeeeez?? Thank you. I think this would have been better in either the Infidelity forum, or the Cheating, Flirting, Jealousy one. Still, as you're asking about the perspective of the OW, it's not entirely in the wrong place. In this situation, I suggest you stop walking on eggshells. Your boyfriend already broke up with you, so there's really nothing left to lose. Be direct with him. Explain again, that it wasn't you who called her, and make it clear that whatever deceit he suspects of you, can also be attributed to other people. Honestly, I do think it looks suspicious; but, that's just my opinion. Maybe something's happened, maybe it hasn't happened yet, or wasn't going to...but if there was nothing going on, even in the emotional sense, it still begs the question: why was he so defensive? Why was he so quick to block you-his GIRLFRIEND-on facebook, and why is he being so protective of this "friend"? No, I believe something-emotional, physical, what have you-is occurring, or has. Confront him, and get what you can get out of this; mainly closure. After that, I suggest moving on. He doesn't sound like he's worth your time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mixedemoticon Posted June 22, 2013 Author Share Posted June 22, 2013 I guess I would still like to know whats going on, if anything, between them. My BF will obviously deny any involvement with her. So its pointless asking him. Would the other woman likely tell me the truth , or do you think not? What do you think he is telling her that she believes HIM?? Link to post Share on other sites
JustAReformedGirl Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 I guess I would still like to know whats going on, if anything, between them. My BF will obviously deny any involvement with her. So its pointless asking him. Would the other woman likely tell me the truth , or do you think not? It's difficult to say. How much do you know about this girl? I figure it couldn't hurt to try and ask her. If he gets mad, too bad. He already broke things off between you; he doesn't get to decide who you do or do not talk to. I have a feeling she probably won't be very forthcoming, but like I said; you won't know until you try. If neither one of them discloses anything, the only option left is to move on. It may be painful, and more than a little frustrating, if you don't receive closure-but, you will get passed this, and things will get better for you. Link to post Share on other sites
RangerJeremiah Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 Let me get this straight... Your boyfriend block YOU on Facebook too? God help you. Leave it alone and don't look back. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mixedemoticon Posted June 22, 2013 Author Share Posted June 22, 2013 @Rebel-Dynasty: What I know about this woman? I know they used to date some time ago (altho I dont know HOW long ago) and they had broken up. I know where she lives and Ive seen his car at her place twice since I have been together with my boyfriend of 6 months. They really cant see much of each other since my BF and I were together most of the time. But she does call him at late hours like 12 midnite etc, but he never answers the phone. He does speak to her on the phone in front of me for short periods of time. The text message that he received form her a month ago said " Thinking about you my love. Call me soon" Link to post Share on other sites
Author mixedemoticon Posted June 22, 2013 Author Share Posted June 22, 2013 @RangerJeremiah- Yes my BF blocked me after telling the OW to block me. He said I snoop too much and its an invasion of his privacy. Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 Moved this to CFJ. If it's a life partnership, we can move to infidelity. Carry on. Link to post Share on other sites
Keke1 Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 Why is she still calling him her boyfriend? Link to post Share on other sites
JustAReformedGirl Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 @Rebel-Dynasty: What I know about this woman? I know they used to date some time ago (altho I dont know HOW long ago) and they had broken up. I know where she lives and Ive seen his car at her place twice since I have been together with my boyfriend of 6 months. They really cant see much of each other since my BF and I were together most of the time. But she does call him at late hours like 12 midnite etc, but he never answers the phone. He does speak to her on the phone in front of me for short periods of time. The text message that he received form her a month ago said " Thinking about you my love. Call me soon" I agree with what Smoocherific said; if he spent time at her house, and she called him at late hours, she probably didn't know he was with you. It's possible she did know, but somehow, I doubt it. You have nothing to lose, so I'd definitely suggest getting what answers you can-if any-from her. After that, close the door on the whole thing. You're better off without him. You will find someone else, but take time to focus on yourself, for awhile. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mixedemoticon Posted June 23, 2013 Author Share Posted June 23, 2013 I agree with what Smoocherific said; if he spent time at her house, and she called him at late hours, she probably didn't know he was with you. But coming back to my original post, IF she got the supposed calls from an anonymous person telling her to leave this man alone cos he has a GF, wouldnt you investigate and try and find out if this was true or not? Link to post Share on other sites
Keke1 Posted June 23, 2013 Share Posted June 23, 2013 I agree with what Smoocherific said; if he spent time at her house, and she called him at late hours, she probably didn't know he was with you. But coming back to my original post, IF she got the supposed calls from an anonymous person telling her to leave this man alone cos he has a GF, wouldnt you investigate and try and find out if this was true or not? I think she did investigate. All roads kept leading back to you lol. Did you get one of your girls to do it? Link to post Share on other sites
Author mixedemoticon Posted June 23, 2013 Author Share Posted June 23, 2013 I wasnt behind the supposed phonecalls to this OW, and no-one I knew , knew about the situation except one friend (who didnt do anything on my behalf!) Thats why I think the OW made up the story about the phone calls. Link to post Share on other sites
Keke1 Posted June 23, 2013 Share Posted June 23, 2013 I wasnt behind the supposed phonecalls to this OW, and no-one I knew , knew about the situation except one friend (who didnt do anything on my behalf!) Thats why I think the OW made up the story about the phone calls. Possible but I'd try my best to leave those two alone. They deserve each other. A lot of games being played with ppls hearts. Link to post Share on other sites
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