2nd chance or is he just curious?

[dazed&confused28]

Ok, I'll try to keep this short. I'm 28 and ex is 30. I was indirectly dumped by my ex in June. I was confused so I finally asked questions on July 24 and got the hint. Finally I decided, I was too crushed to talk to him anymore, so I started NC.

 

I emailed him in Sept on his b'day to wish him a happy birthday. He replied back and that's where the confusion started. He replied back, and was polite, saying thank you. I said welcome and thought ok that is end of conversation. I didn't expect anymore from him. 30 mins later he emailed me back and stated he found one of my books at his place while he was packing. I consulted with a few friends and wrote back, pertending I forgot about the book and didn't know where it was. He then replied "Yea it was. It had been a long time since I had seen you"

I emailed him back but avoided the "seeing me for a long time" comment, and he never emailed me back.

I couldn't get the nerve to email him back about it not seeing me. I was scared what that meant and I didn't want to be disappointed. So I decided to keep all my answers neutral and simple.

 

Then today I decided, I would finally email him back about the book. I kept it really simple! I sent "I hope you are doing well. Thanks for reminding about my book. I wanted to know when you were avaliable, so I can come by and get my book. If you're not comfortable, let me know, I can arrange for something else"

 

He emailed me back today stating "I am doing ok. Just keeping up with work. Just got back from Cozumel a little while ago. That was a nice trip. I am going to have to take some time to go through storage and find it. I am sure it is packed up with my other books. How have things been going for you?"

 

I sent a email back today saying "I'm glad to hear you're doing well. Cozumel sounds nice. What things did you do there? Did you have fun? Did you get a tan? I'm sure you got to relax and had lot's of fun! It's ok, take you time finding the book, I'm in no rush. I am doing ok."

 

He then sends a email back "Yea, it was nice to get away. I had never been to Mexico before. Had a lot of fun down there but we spent most of our time on the boat. It got extended some since the ports were closed because of hurricane Jeannie. Glad to hear you are doing ok. Are you still living at home?"

 

I'm now not sure what to say!

 

To be honest, his major concern was he didn't get to see me because I lived at home with my parent(they are very strict). That's why of the break up. Now almost 3 months of NC, he's brought up the question again? I did move out last week and started living with my uncle and aunt (they are cool). But I'm flip-flopping staying with my parents on the weekdays and at aunts on the weekends. Plus if I live with my aunt I would have to commute 1 hour to work everyday, that why I live with my parents(commute is only 10 mins). The only reason I decided to move out was because of him. But when he broke up with me, I decided I should stay home, since there was no reason for me to move 1 hour away anymore, I became hesistant to move! Which is my current position.

 

Do you guys have any advice on what I should say or do?? Any ideas what he's trying to say?? I'm trying so hard not to build things out of this conversation. But it's confusing, and my friends are starting to get confused also!

 

Thanks!

[Spira]

Probably the best thing to do is just keep it simple, short, and somewhat impersonal. No mixed messages... tell him honestly about your living situation, but then change the subject so he doesn't dwell on it.

[Weird]

sounds like he may just be curious if you are still living with your parents. I don't see why you wouldn't tell him about your current living situation.