joystickd Posted July 5, 2013 Share Posted July 5, 2013 It's funny how much can be discovered about a person from just a single sentence. and your point being? Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted July 5, 2013 Share Posted July 5, 2013 and your point being? Point being that you over scrutinize women and are passive aggressive. Look at your sentence..."over dramatize like a FEMALE". You exhibit a bias against women from your need to add "like a female" to the end of your statement. You're also passive aggressive, noted from your subtle jab towards my masculinity. Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted July 5, 2013 Share Posted July 5, 2013 Point being that you over scrutinize women and are passive aggressive. Look at your sentence..."over dramatize like a FEMALE". You exhibit a bias against women from your need to add "like a female" to the end of your statement. You're also passive aggressive, noted from your subtle jab towards my masculinity. LMAO! I mean lets look on here the some of the women on here do over dramatize statements being made. For example a man get on here and talks about not wanting to wait for sex then he is entitled. I mean like women on here. LOL! There is nothing passive aggressive about me. Save the armchair analysis for someone you can actually accurately read, OK 1 Link to post Share on other sites
therhythm Posted July 5, 2013 Share Posted July 5, 2013 LMAO! I mean lets look on here the some of the women on here do over dramatize statements being made. For example a man get on here and talks about not wanting to wait for sex then he is entitled. I mean like women on here. LOL! There is nothing passive aggressive about me. Save the armchair analysis for someone you can actually accurately read, OK Our friend KFJ have the tendency to get personal when people do not agree with him.. funny enough that says much more about him than about anyone else... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted July 5, 2013 Share Posted July 5, 2013 Our friend KFJ have the tendency to get personal when people do not agree with him.. funny enough that says much more about him than about anyone else... I agree it does Link to post Share on other sites
AMusing Posted July 5, 2013 Share Posted July 5, 2013 3)Go there with someone else If he's so hard-headed about not going and it is such a huge dream for you, he should support you in making it come true, even if he's not the active part of it. Well, yeah, that's one of the reasons the trip analogy falls flat; I could easily travel with a friend, family, or hell, by myself, and expect my boyfriend to be supportive & happy for me. For OP's situation... not so much. Link to post Share on other sites
PlumPrincess Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 Me and my girlfriend have been together 6 months now and we were having a drink together when she revealed intimate details about her ex and her. I'd always maintained I wouldn't discuss my previous history as its disrespectful and in the past. Anyway, she told me that she and her ex of 5 years used to have back door fun together, so I was a bit upset by that as we haven't tried that together and it's one of the last things I have yet to experience, so I brought up the subject asking if we could "try" that together sometime as I've never experienced it and she shot me down and said she's not interested in it anymore at all, so now I'm left knowing she would be more adventurous/intimate with her ex despite him cheating on her and by the sounds of it, not being as good a boyfriend as me! I'm very hurt by this and almost feel "second best" Honestly, you sound kind of childish. her mum was talking the other day how one of her daughters favourite sexual endeavours is anal and I was in the room and felt really embarrassed as we haven't tried it together. I feel sad about it how do I make myself feel better about the situation? Thanks What mom talks about her daughter's sexual preference??? :confused: And you're embarrassed, because you haven't done it yet? And sad? :confused: Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jonno20 Posted July 7, 2013 Author Share Posted July 7, 2013 She didn't say it was her favourite, her mums exact words were "that's one of ****** favourite to her cousin when they were talking about it. My girlfriend when drunk blurted out that she had done anal before when something came on tv and I asked why shouldn't we try it together to which she responded I used to find it pleasurable when younger but don't like it now... Shot down in flames and given info I didn't want to hear either and I know she used to find it "pleasurable".... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jonno20 Posted July 7, 2013 Author Share Posted July 7, 2013 This thread has gone on like forever now! I'll ask to try it soon and if told no I will look elsewhere simple and get a new gf, I feel disrespected and second best, it's not about anal it's about principle that's it!!! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
PlumPrincess Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 Good grief, this is childish. I hope her next boyfriend is a bit more mature. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Got it Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 Good! Please do so soon. This girl needs to see her boyfriend's true colors and find a man that is emotionally mature. She needs to know she is only as good as her sex acts. Please do, make this the hill you want to die on. It will be one that you will look back with pride I am sure. Anal or nothing else! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jonno20 Posted July 7, 2013 Author Share Posted July 7, 2013 Good grief, this is childish. I hope her next boyfriend is a bit more mature. Wow... So you would be OKAY about your new partner discussing their ex a lot and even the intimate details such as sex? I take my hat off to you... You must be some kind of super human being!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jonno20 Posted July 7, 2013 Author Share Posted July 7, 2013 Good grief, this is childish. I hope her next boyfriend is a bit more mature. Maybe the female is the one being childish discussing such things? I quite clearly make sure when I meet somebody that I do not discuss past relationships, there is no good to come from discussing intimate details is there? Link to post Share on other sites
PlumPrincess Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 My girlfriend when drunk blurted out that she had done anal before when something came on tv and I asked why shouldn't we try it together to which she responded I used to find it pleasurable when younger but don't like it now... Shot down in flames and given info I didn't want to hear either and I know she used to find it "pleasurable".... So you would be OKAY about your new partner discussing their ex a lot and even the intimate details such as sex? I take my hat off to you... You must be some kind of super human being!! It doesn't sound like she sat with you and gave you an analytic description of her past sex life with her ex... She doesn't want to do it anymore, so why won't you leave her alone? Link to post Share on other sites
therhythm Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 Maybe the female is the one being childish discussing such things? I quite clearly make sure when I meet somebody that I do not discuss past relationships, there is no good to come from discussing intimate details is there? Oh don't listen to them... they are projecting their own $hit on you... just do what it feels good for you... and hopefully you will get a person who does not make tailor made boundaries for you 1 Link to post Share on other sites
therhythm Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 (edited) It doesn't sound like she sat with you and gave you an analytic description of her past sex life with her ex... She doesn't want to do it anymore, so why won't you leave her alone? It is what he is going to do leave her alone... for ever ... The guy has taken his decision so I guess if you ladies do not like the outcome you just need to chill... it is his life not yours! Edited July 7, 2013 by therhythm 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PlumPrincess Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 It is what he is going to do leave her alone... for ever ... The guy has taken his decision so I guess if you ladies do not like the outcome you just need to chill... it is his life not yours! You're so grown up... Link to post Share on other sites
therhythm Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 You're so grown up... Well, since I am not the one making this a personal issue I can say that grown up or not I have some manners... One thing is that you don't like my opinion, other thing is that you need to bring it to the personal level... very sad! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
IHateHypocrites Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 Well, since I am not the one making this a personal issue I can say that grown up or not I have some manners... One thing is that you don't like my opinion, other thing is that you need to bring it to the personal level... very sad! Exactly. What's up with those passive-aggressive insults about being immature and insecure? A guy wants anal. He wants to make it happen with his gf. She refuses, even though she has done so in the past and reportedly enjoyed it. If she's so hard-headed about it, I see no problem in dumping her, if only for simple sexual incompatibility. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 What's up with those passive-aggressive insults about being immature and insecure? It's their attempt to discount your valuations of OP's girlfriend as inferior to other women who would perform anal sex. Since they would probably react the same way as OP's girlfriend, they feel as though you are indirectly judging them as inferior. Thus, to mitigate this, they call you immature and insecure to invalidate your valuations. Short answer? Jealousy. People hate on what they don't have, or in this case, what they don't want to give. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 Sounds like op's gf is better off without him so I guess he'll be doing both of them a favor. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
camillalev Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 (edited) Sounds like op's gf is better off without him so I guess he'll be doing both of them a favor. Agreed, perhaps they're both better off. Edited July 8, 2013 by camillalev Link to post Share on other sites
camillalev Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 (edited) Wow... So you would be OKAY about your new partner discussing their ex a lot and even the intimate details such as sex? I take my hat off to you... You must be some kind of super human being!! Been there, sucks b(alls. The past should stay in the past. That can't be denied. Did you tell her how you feel? The last time this happened to me I was 21, though if it happened to me now I would tell them what was on my mind. About anal, I would not push it. If you're sincerely looking to move past this, go travel and have lots of hotel sex or something. You're only in the beginning of a relationship there are a million and one adventurous sex acts to explore. As for her not wanting to try it again, she may have enjoyed it once but anal can have repercussions. Even the gay guys I know have suffered thanks to anal sex. Thing is, they don't have a choice. She does. An anal tear usually takes weeks to recover from, due to having to defecate and the cuts reopening. Trust me it's not fun. Edited July 8, 2013 by camillalev Link to post Share on other sites
PlumPrincess Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 Exactly. What's up with those passive-aggressive insults about being immature and insecure? A guy wants anal. He wants to make it happen with his gf. She refuses, even though she has done so in the past and reportedly enjoyed it. If she's so hard-headed about it, I see no problem in dumping her, if only for simple sexual incompatibility. The problem is that he takes it personally when his girlfriend doesn't want to do specific things with him that she used to to in the past. As if it had something to do with him. Also, he acts as if he has a right to it, so when he wants to do it, she has to want it, too. And since he has never experienced it, she is obliged to give him this experience because she already had it. And when he didn't get what he wanted, he threw a temper tantrum and pouted, at least that how he comes across online. Link to post Share on other sites
therhythm Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 (edited) Ok OP I will tell you how this works... you have a situation in your life and you are curious how other people would react in the same situation so you have posted that in a public forum. There is people who will give you an objective view (what they would do if they were you) but other people just prefer to judge you based on your question and tell you how wrong you are to even feel like you feel (like if you could control how you feel about something ). Then there is also those people who think their way is the only possible way and any decisions you may make that do not agree with their view of te matter makes you weak, insecure... they again try to passive-aggressive tell you how you don't deserve your girlfriend etc (that is not advise is judgment), this is also an aggressive way to try to manipulate you to do what they want you to do At the end of the day you need to analyse all the advises you have got in your thread but you know your life situation better than anyone here and you are the one who need to make a decision because it is your life. This thread will no longer be viewed or affecting to anyone after a couple of days, people commenting here will be posting their opinions (or passing their judgment) in other threads but your life will continue and you will need to face your own decision. Every decision has its own consequences so think good what you want to do and don't allow anyone to try to force you one way or another just because they think they know better what is good for you or how you need to feel. Good luck whatever you decide to do, you have my sympathies ! Edited July 8, 2013 by therhythm 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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