Guest00 Posted October 19, 2004 Share Posted October 19, 2004 My wife and I have been married for one year, and lately it seems we are friends more than partners, and I would like to know how one would go about getting her to fall back in love with you, rather than just loving you. I feel we have grown apart a little, and would like to get that spark back between us. I know she loves me, but I guess I feel she is not 'in love' with me. Any suggestions? Link to post Share on other sites
Matilda Posted October 19, 2004 Share Posted October 19, 2004 I suggest doing some reading about relationships and marriage. I have just finished reading a book called the "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. I think you might find it helpful. Also, there is a lot of great information about marriage on marriagebuilders.com. Link to post Share on other sites
shortbus74 Posted October 19, 2004 Share Posted October 19, 2004 sounds like you have entered the "comfort zone"........ If you are sincere about putting the spark back in the relationship my suggestion is plan to do things when you have free time.....quick lunch if time permits....I would also suggest doing the "little things" like filling her car up with gas...(my fiance does this for me and I him for this) helping out around the house...seeing that item at a store that reminds you of you sweetie and getting it for her......giving affection for no reason but you love to do it...looking at her and telling her you love her......back rubs! need any more suggestions just let me know! I have a million ideals! Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted October 19, 2004 Share Posted October 19, 2004 Be affectionate, spontaneous, and show her how much you love her...Hearing it is wonderful too! Sometimes us females need to see it with our own eyes. Do romantic get aways...Be silly and fun, laugh and share jokes! Do a bed/breakfast long weekend getaway or a nice hotel. My husband and I have been together for 11 years. I know about the spark being gone abit here and there. Just know that it does get better!! But then there will be times that spark isn't there...But it comes back. You can't always have that high sexually intensity!! I wish we did, or he did with me...But I know it will come and go as days/months/years pass. Don't give up okay? One thing I do is make her feel good about herself. Tell her how much you want her, desire her and how much you want her to feel good when you are having sex. Put the focus on her and her only. She will LOVE that. Post back!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Stone Posted October 19, 2004 Share Posted October 19, 2004 I found this on another fourm I belong to but it has some awasome points.... It is a CHRISTIAN WEB sight DUH nevermind the site isn't working I'll be right back Link to post Share on other sites
tiki Posted October 19, 2004 Share Posted October 19, 2004 This may be the same one SH is talkin about... lovingyou.com I love the site, it has awesome ideas. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Stone Posted October 19, 2004 Share Posted October 19, 2004 cut and paste works wonders LOL This list contains more than 200 things. Listed below are some of the offenses that husbands typically commit against their wives. As you read through this list you may wish to check any of these offenses that apply to you. ___ 1. Ignoring her ___ 2. Not valuing her opinions ___ 3. Paying other people more attention than I pay her ___ 4. Not listening to her or not understanding what she feels is important ___ 5. Closing her out by not talking to her or by not listening to her (the Silent Treatment) ___ 6. Being easily distracted when she’s trying to talk ___ 7. Not scheduling special time to be with her ___ 8. Not being open to talk about things that I don’t understand ___ 9. Not being open to talk about things that she doesn’t understand ___ 10. Not giving her a chance to fully voice her opinion on decisions that affect the entire family ___ 11. Punishing her by being angry or silent ___ 12. Making jokes about certain aspects of her life ___ 13. Making sarcastic comments about her ___ 14. Insulting her in front of other people ___ 15. Coming back at her with quick retorts when we are arguing ___ 16. Giving harsh admonitions ___ 17. Using careless words before I think through how they will affect her ___ 18. Nagging her and speaking harshly ___ 19. Correcting her before giving her a chance to fully explain a situation ___ 20. Raising my voice at her ___ 21. Making critical comments that seem to have no logical basis ___ 22. Swearing or using foul language in her presence ___ 23. Correcting her in public ___ 24. Being tactless when pointing out her weaknesses or “blind spots” ___ 25. Reminding her angrily that I warned her not to do something ___ 26. Having disgusted or judgmental attitudes in general ___ 27. Pressuring her when she is already feeling low or offended ___ 28. Lecturing her when she needs to be comforted, encouraged, or treated gently ___ 29. Breaking promises without any explanation or without asking to be released from the promise ___ 30. Telling her how wonderful other women are and comparing her in any way to other women ___ 31. Holding onto resentment about something that she did and which she tried to make right ___ 32. Being disrespectful to her family members and other relatives ___ 33. Coercing her into arguments ___ 34. Correcting or punishing her in anger for something that she is not guilty of ___ 35. Not praising her for something that she did well, even if she did it for me ___ 36. Treating her like a child ___ 37. Being rude to her or to other people when we are in public (such as Link to post Share on other sites
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