My bf moved away and wants me to follow to a place I won't find work

[Emmie]

Hello there, I'm new to this site, but I'm desperate for some advice or clarity.

 

I've been dating my boyfriend for 3 1/2 years. I new I was in love with him, but didn't really understand how much until he moved to the other side of the country a couple of weeks ago. The original plan was for him to spend 3 months in Whitehorse, YT Canada helping his parents manage their property but since he's been gone he's been offered jobs left and right paying over $50,000 a year (much more than he makes here). Now he wants me to move to Whitehorse (Population: much smaller than I can deal with, I'm a city girl) to be with him.

 

Here's the problem: I love him, he could be "the one" but I'm much too young and unprepared for the big commitment. I just graduated my second degree from university and am ready to move away from home. But the problem is that my degree is in Computer Technology, which means if I were to move to Whitehorse for a few years, I would become outdated and unemployable when I return to bigger cities. Also, if I were to move to be with him, I would have to settle for a position in retail and not even use my degrees. Do I really want to throw away 4 years of hard work in university?

 

The solution that I can think of, is moving to Vancouver, BC (a day & 1/2 car ride away) to be closer to him and hopefully to find a job in my field and try the LD thing for a little while. But what do we do when/if we do want to get married? What if we drift apart? He's not exactly the best at calling everyday, and he doesn't have the Internet. What have others done?

 

I would appreciate any opinions or advice on my situation.

 

Emmie

 

[bluechocolate]

I'm sure they have computers in Whitehorse. Surely it is not a given that you won't be able to use your degree? Who says you'll have to "settle" for a job in retail? Even shops have IT systems.

 

If you really do love him & think that he may be "the one" then why not give it a trial period? Say you go up there for 3 or 6 months & then reasses the situation? (I wouldn't go in winter though !!)

[EC]

I agree with the first poster....

 

Do a trial period and see how it works out and then decide.

 

I do think you will be able to find work there though..You do not have to settle for retail.

[mixwell]

hey emmie thats how me and my ex are.. i moved far away and she was worried about moving back here and not finding any work.. im from the big city and moved to a smaller place.. be sure its what you want though.. my ex didnt come back because i didnt think she'd like it and so here i am back here away from her.. its really going to make you miserable if you arent with him.. i thought we could do it but she says she doesnt wana LD relationship.. im moving back out where shes at the end of this month because i cant stand it anymore.. you might want to think about it.. it really sucks !! besides theres going to be jobs out there.. i am in the computer field but im fairly new.. they have IT jobs where im at though. the thing is though that my g/f didnt come back and its my fault and now she doesnt want to anymore... ive been with her though for 8 years.. im young too im only 21.. ive been with her since like 8th grade... so i dont know.. if i were you i would move because if not you might end up wondering what it woulda been like if you would have moved if you dont.. i dont know thats what i would do if i were in your situation.. so now i have to try to get her back again.. shes kinda pist off at me still for leaving her out there.. so only time will tell with us.. hope this helps you some..

 

GOOD LUCK !