patrol Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 I'm a guy who needs some advice. There's a few girls from my dorm last year that I thought were really nice people that I'd like to stay in contact with. I've always had problems maintaining friendships with people in general but it's especially hard with girls. My fear is that if I asked a girl that I don't know very well to get lunch or to hang out, she'll automatically think I was asking them out on a date when I really only want to catch up. Is my fear valid? Is there a way I can build friendships with girls without them thinking that I'm hitting on them? Link to post Share on other sites
Shaun-Dro Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 I'm a guy who needs some advice. There's a few girls from my dorm last year that I thought were really nice people that I'd like to stay in contact with. I've always had problems maintaining friendships with people in general but it's especially hard with girls. My fear is that if I asked a girl that I don't know very well to get lunch or to hang out, she'll automatically think I was asking them out on a date when I really only want to catch up. Is my fear valid? Is there a way I can build friendships with girls without them thinking that I'm hitting on them? What's your motive in wanting to hang out with these girls? Are you really interested in dating them down the line or are you seriously considering just a platonic friendship? If it's the latter, then you approach it as is. If it's the former, then you be upfront and show your interest by flirting and stepping up to the plate. I've gotten all my women by being who I am: a sexual male. The same applies to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author patrol Posted July 6, 2013 Author Share Posted July 6, 2013 What's your motive in wanting to hang out with these girls? Are you really interested in dating them down the line or are you seriously considering just a platonic friendship? If it's the latter, then you approach it as is. If it's the former, then you be upfront and show your interest by flirting and stepping up to the plate. I've gotten all my women by being who I am: a sexual male. The same applies to you. Purely platonic. So you're saying I should just ask them to hang out and have lunch with me to catch-up? Link to post Share on other sites
leongrado Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 I would recommend making it a group hangout if possible. Bring at least one guy you both know and bring other girls if possible. Then she won't get the wrong idea. Link to post Share on other sites
Author patrol Posted July 7, 2013 Author Share Posted July 7, 2013 I would recommend making it a group hangout if possible. Bring at least one guy you both know and bring other girls if possible. Then she won't get the wrong idea. Sounds like a good idea except I don't know any of her friends that are guys. Link to post Share on other sites
violetsareviolet Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 think outside the box about things you can do to resonate a platonic relationship. keyword is: FUN, and the recommendations for a group situation are spot-on sitting down to eat isnt really fun...and is pretty damn awkward unless you're already friends...why so interested in catching up? why not look forward and make new memories? bowling, ultimate frisbee, beach or park day with a group, etc etc honestly though, there is nothing quite like the camaraderie among men as friendships are concerned...don't be surprised if women don't enjoy doing "friend" hang-out stuff as much. surely it is possible, but the fairer sex have different wiring in the brain for this sort of thing goodluck Link to post Share on other sites
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