In bizzaro world (this forum) women dont ask about a guys sexual history?

[therhythm]

Yes there are women and men conservative with sex and there is nothing wrong about it but there is nothing wrong with people who just like to enjoy sex casually either.

 

There are some people who would disqualify you for a relationship if you do casual sex but it is something I am very much willing to accept in my case, there are always reasons why someone can disqualify you.... that should not be the reason why you don't do casual sex.

If you have strong values about how sex should be linked to love then is ok but never do it out of fear of being rejected... people may reject you for so many things that if you worry about all of them you will create new ones :lmao:

 

Just remember that your sexuality is only yours and no one can tell you how to live it. Every choice has its consequences in life... just learn about them and live up to those consequences.

Edited July 10, 2013 by therhythm

[samsungxoxo]

I also fail to believe that these same women that are looking for guys who run on the inexperienced side are inexperienced themselves. Most women who have had a normal life usually have had a couple boyfriends and a hookup here or there.

Then I must be way below normal. I'm only a number passed virginity status and it has remained that way since I was 20 (last I saw him; afterwards we were in a long-distance relationship). It's been 6 years later and my number hasn't change.

 

I have no interest in casual sex, nor ONS, nor FWB.

So for her to hope that I have a low partner count or none at all seems like it would be an effort to control me, which is something I will certainly not sign up for. I don't care if a woman has a high partner count. However, marriage is out of the question for me due to the amount of women I've seen in marriages and relationships use subtle underhanded means to control the guy.

It's all about finding the person that's ok with your views and on the same page. All you have to do is stay away from conservative or marriage-minded women and look for the ones into casual relationships. Don't string along those women as they don't deserve that. Same as you wouldn't like a woman using ''abstinence until marriage'' against you and trying to string you along. Edited July 11, 2013 by samsungxoxo

[RedRobin]

I care about a man's sexual history, however, I've never asked for his number.

 

He either volunteered it without me asking, or I was able to deduce something close enough based on discussions about his views on sex... both past and present.

 

Past is NOT the past to me. I demand consistency... and proof that his current values are not only what he says they are... but verifiable proof that he can actually follow through on what he promises.

 

That said, I don't expect perfection.

 

... in cases where he has not been consistent with his current values, he better have a good explanation that demonstrates responsibility and proof that he has developed better coping skills for an extended period of time.

 

I'm mainly looking for patterns here... risk assessment.

[kaylan]

Show me the carfax is basically your approach to dating.

Could you imagine that?

 

(I made it myself btw haha)

[Arabella]

Could you imagine that?

 

(I made it myself btw haha)

 

Ok... you get cute points.

[JackDrc]

I don't believe we are as few as you think. Probably not a majority, but definitely not a tiny portion either.

 

You sound very young. You will find that in a few years (25+), women will start caring a little more about what your sexual past looks like. This is because they're looking for an eventual husband, and they don't want a man-whore who spent his early 20s sleeping around.

 

How would you ever know how many guys a man or woman has been with? If the number is high then they will lie. If calling promiscuous girls sluts is wrong then so is referring to men as man-whores. Btw psychological studies show that a high number of premarital partners in a woman's last will dramatically affect the future stability of her marriage, on average. The effect is nowhere near as pronounced for men because a lot of women with high numbers seem to take it out on men.

Edited July 12, 2013 by JackDrc

[Pompeii]

How would you ever know how many guys a man or woman has been with? If the number is high then they will lie. If calling promiscuous girls sluts is wrong then so is referring to men as man-whores. Btw psychological studies show that a high number of premarital partners in a woman's last will dramatically affect the future stability of her marriage, on average. The effect is nowhere near as pronounced for men because a lot of women with high numbers seem to take it out on men.

 

I don't know... I have a lot of female friends and the ones that have been extremely sexually active, something in them seems... lost. I remember coming in college and a lot of girls had a certain "twinkle" or "sparkle" in their eyes. I'm now going to be starting my third year and at the end of this year a lot of these same girls lost that twinkle. They looked more... dead. I don't know, it's just something I can't put my finger on. If you look at prostitutes, its a similar look. Meanwhile, my guy friends who have sex with a lot of women, they seem to become more confident, more like men.

 

In my opinion, an inexperienced guy won't do well with a really experienced girl. The visa-versa relationship seems to be more of the one that has a higher chance of succeeding. The first one can work but it seems like the woman ends up getting the upper hand in that relationship.

[JackDrc]

I don't know... I have a lot of female friends and the ones that have been extremely sexually active, something in them seems... lost. I remember coming in college and a lot of girls had a certain "twinkle" or "sparkle" in their eyes. I'm now going to be starting my third year and at the end of this year a lot of these same girls lost that twinkle. They looked more... dead. I don't know, it's just something I can't put my finger on. If you look at prostitutes, its a similar look. Meanwhile, my guy friends who have sex with a lot of women, they seem to become more confident, more like men.

 

In my opinion, an inexperienced guy won't do well with a really experienced girl. The visa-versa relationship seems to be more of the one that has a higher chance of succeeding. The first one can work but it seems like the woman ends up getting the upper hand in that relationship.

 

I notice the exact same thing and find it usually very easy to get a rough idea of how experienced she is. If the bj is mediocre then thats a very strong indicator of a lack of experience. Doesn't necessarily mean a girl who gives great ones has been with many guys though. It could have been one ex who told her how to improve.

 

The woman definitely has the upper hand in your example above because she views herself as lucky to have this inexperienced male provider husband and he considers himself lucky to have a girl, period. This marriage is ripe for infidelity on the part of the woman.