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Confused about this situation


Cutie19

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well, its actually quite personal, it all started when i was in gr 12, i met someone who became close to me the instant she met me, and i absolutely loved it, I love her with all my heart, and we were inseparate all during my last 2 years in highschool , i mean we spend every day together practically, she's the biggest inspiration to me. We took pictures together when i graduated and everything it was soooooo cute!

 

She also stayed for my gr 13 year but that finished, i had found out she was leaving the school, it turns out the reason why she was leaving was because i was gone!what does that mean!?Yeah i know i left to start college, I called her for her birthday but later that year she told me she didn't want us talking on the phone because she was too busy at school which was explainable, I respect her and will do anything for her! When i talk to her on the phone she gets soooooooooooooo incredibly happy to hear from me and everything!

 

I just don't know what to do?! Because she doesn't want me calling her anymore, but i miss her sooooooooooo much!and it feels like she is apart of me no matter what, her sister passed away when i was in gr 9 and her 1st yr teaching at my school, and when she met me she loved me and still proabably does! I'm not sure!I need help?! When i'm with her, i'm happy, but when we are apart its ok, but i think about her everyday i wonder if she does the same with me?!I mean we have the same sense of style, dressed the same on more than 1 occasion, we are a wk apart in birthdays, we share alot of the same stuff?! I just need help!someone give me advice?!

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Have you told her how you feel? Maybe it's possible that she's trying to keep her distance in fear that you going off to college will come between you both, so she's trying to break things off before she gets hurt. It sounds to me like you should call her and tell her how your feeling, if she doesn't want you to call after she know's how you feel, maybe it's time to give her space.

 

Good luck

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yeah, i've given her space and such, i think she is in fear of me, going to college and she doesn't want to go to the same highschool as i went to because of the memories me and her had,but however i send her a birthday card hoping she responds back to it, saying how much i miss her and i do love her like as if she was my sister, it feels like i have to protect her and thats what shes doing with me! do u get what i'm saying!do u think our close friendship will last, i mean she doesn't do this anyone but me!i love her 2 pieces and i told her that!what do u think about me and her?!

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bluechocolate
Originally posted by Cutie19

i'm talking about my friend

 

Well see, thats the thing - it doesn't sound like it.

 

Yes, friends love each other but this sounds quite intense

 

when she met me she loved me and still proabably does! I'm not sure!I need help?!

 

but i miss her sooooooooooo much

 

it feels like i have to protect her

 

i love her 2 pieces and i told her that

 

i met someone who became close to me the instant she met me, and i absolutely loved it,

 

I love her with all my heart, and we were inseparate all during my last 2 years in highschool

 

feels like she is apart of me no matter what

 

Could it be that all this intensity & neediness is getting to be too much for her? Do you have any other friends?

 

I'm still a bit confused - you are now in college & she is still in high school? Therefore she is younger than you? If that is the case then perhaps she is growing up now & doesn't need a big sister so much anymore?

 

You know that when high school is over & people go on to college or university or work their whole world changes, including their relationships. Some friendship will stand the test of time & some won't & even the ones that continue will change. That is just a fact of life. It can't always be like it was in high school.

 

Anyway I think you both should find new friends but that doesn't mean your friendship together has to end, it's just going to be different.

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I'm college now, however she's a teacher at a new highschool, if that answers ur question, we were close from the moment we met eachother, we spent every day together, doing things, i highly doubt the neediness is getting too much for her, and there is no intensity whats so ever!i hardly talk to her and see her as it is!so i don't really get what ur saying

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Okay - I read it about three times to be sure I saw that she was actually a teacher at your school.

 

1) She was a teacher at your school when you were under eighteen years old.

2) You got very close.

3) You spent every day together.

4) You think she loves you.

5) You love her to pieces.

6) She's still a teacher.

 

I'd say your teacher has realized the implications of what has occurred between the two of you and would prefer that you just disappear. Get the picture? She might get into quite bit of trouble if this was out in the open.

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bluechocolate
Originally posted by Cutie19

I'm college now, however she's a teacher at a new highschool, if that answers ur question, we were close from the moment we met eachother, we spent every day together, doing things, i highly doubt the neediness is getting too much for her, and there is no intensity whats so ever!i hardly talk to her and see her as it is!so i don't really get what ur saying

 

Yikes! Well clearly I didn't get the "teacher" thing. Yes, I read it in your first post but because I found your post(s) somewhat confusing it just didn't sink in as the over all tenor of your dialogue here did not indicate a teacher-student relationship in any way shape or form.

 

I don't get how you can say that there is no intensity whatsoever - your posts read to be full of intense feelings on your part. Re-read them.

 

Anyway, I'm with Pocky

 

your teacher has realized the implications of what has occurred between the two of you and would prefer that you just disappear
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I don't think she would be that rude, and basically tell me to disappear, however you don't know what we've been through together, so i can and can't see where u are coming from, yes she is a teacher and yes if this was out in the open, yeah she could have gotten into a lot of trouble, hence its been a year that i haven't been her student so techanically she wouldn't get in trouble , and the reason i know this because i have parents who are in the teaching industry.

 

But its a quite complicated situation, that on both of our parts, have alot of thinking to do!get my point, i do thank you for replying to situation, i will take what u said into consideration, but understand this, did u ever have someone like that?!

Within the 2 yrs that i've known her, she has never ever ever been rude to me whatsoever!so i highly doubt she would want me to disappear!

 

I was 17 when i met her, i love her as if she was an older sister, i don't see anything wrong with that, maybe u haven't had friendship like that!

Quite frankly, i don't care that she's a teacher, i never thought of her as one, i thought of her more as a friend and a sister then anything, she is an authority figure yeah! i don't think she realizes the implications because there isn't any to begin with!

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Are your parents aware of the close relationship you've had with your teacher (ex-teacher) for the past two years?

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bluechocolate

I was 17 when i met her, i love her as if she was an older sister, i don't see anything wrong with that, maybe u haven't had friendship like that!

 

OK then - you have a frienship that no one else can fathom because they have never felt like that.

 

It sounds to be like this teacher had a wholly inappropriate relationship with a student - you both knew that

 

yeah she could have gotten into a lot of trouble, hence its been a year that i haven't been her student so techanically she wouldn't get in trouble

 

and it was certainly unprofessional on her part to allow it to happen.

 

Anyway, she doesn't want you calling her anymore, so don't.

 

Friends come & go & sometimes that is sad, but it is a fact of life. You'll make new friends.

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