You will find someone better !

[Sarabi]

This thread is funny

I mostly think those "one day you'll find someone better" platitudes are annoying too

I don't bother reading the highschoolers "I've never been kissed and I'm only 10..." threads.

I have a cynical outlook too...its hard to think positive but it can be done!

I don't go to the gym but I do cycle to work and I can feel my thighs getting firmer and my time improving coming home(its uphill and its a struggle!!!) it may not be a big deal to anyone else but it makes me feel good gym/exercise releases endorphins so you feel good.

As for never meeting amyone else...I don't l know. Is it in my hands is it in God's hands? Perhaps a bit of both. I have been told to put it in God's hands and he will send someone lovely my way...I have also been told to speak to the universe.

Positivity and remaining expectant are key apparently. I am relatively young(under 30)...might have plenty of time, might not. I want to meet someone for various reasons...yeah yeah yeah, I have to do all the work on myself but I hope for my efforts I am rewarded handsomely.

 

Lol good luck Zammo let me know when you're ready to skip through the field of rainbows and unicorns with me

[GorillaTheater]

Zammo, 50 years old people don't give advices that say " check out Alanis Morrisette". I don't mean any offense to the other posters in their 50's, but I doubt they know who Alanis Morrisette is...

 

The name rings a vague bell.

 

All I know is that if God forbid something happens to my marriage, I'm off for the UK. Something about the LS ladies posting from there...

 

I'd expect people my age to be a little more resiliant and a little less self-pitying.

[amaysngrace]

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. Does anyone really believe this Horse**** ? It is very irritating and all to prevelent on this site. Well, maybe you won't.

 

Maybe if you work to improve yourself the someone better may just be yourself...which is kind of cool since you are the one you spend 100% of your time with...

[whichwayisup]

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. Does anyone really believe this Horse**** ? It is very irritating and all to prevelent on this site. Well, maybe you won't. All this crap about " look after yourself " and someone great will come along. It is from Hollywood films and not with anything based in reality and the real World. Well I hate to tell you this but you may not find anyone better and all the trips to the Gym and " improving " yourself maybe a pile of crap. Just balancing the Bull**** posted on here.

 

Have a great Day. Zammo.

 

So, would you rather be told, "you'll never find anybody else. Don't look after yourself, just give up. The World is a cold cruel place, just stay in bed, pull the covers over your head."

 

After ANY break up, one hurts, especially the person who was dumped. People's confidence gets knocked down a few pegs, their self esteem suffers! That's why it's actually a good thing to say positive things and help someone by encouraging them to think ahead, that one day they will meet another guy/girl. Doing nothing and wallowing in it all is too negative and can ruin a person.

[Zammo25]

So, would you rather be told, "you'll never find anybody else. Don't look after yourself, just give up. The World is a cold cruel place, just stay in bed, pull the covers over your head."

 

After ANY break up, one hurts, especially the person who was dumped. People's confidence gets knocked down a few pegs, their self esteem suffers! That's why it's actually a good thing to say positive things and help someone by encouraging them to think ahead, that one day they will meet another guy/girl. Doing nothing and wallowing in it all is too negative and can ruin a person.

 

I have given up now. It is a pointless and futile exercise. Once you reach 50 and find yourself single, the game is up.

[Zammo25]

This thread is funny

I mostly think those "one day you'll find someone better" platitudes are annoying too

I don't bother reading the highschoolers "I've never been kissed and I'm only 10..." threads.

I have a cynical outlook too...its hard to think positive but it can be done!

I don't go to the gym but I do cycle to work and I can feel my thighs getting firmer and my time improving coming home(its uphill and its a struggle!!!) it may not be a big deal to anyone else but it makes me feel good gym/exercise releases endorphins so you feel good.

As for never meeting amyone else...I don't l know. Is it in my hands is it in God's hands? Perhaps a bit of both. I have been told to put it in God's hands and he will send someone lovely my way...I have also been told to speak to the universe.

Positivity and remaining expectant are key apparently. I am relatively young(under 30)...might have plenty of time, might not. I want to meet someone for various reasons...yeah yeah yeah, I have to do all the work on myself but I hope for my efforts I am rewarded handsomely.

 

Lol good luck Zammo let me know when you're ready to skip through the field of rainbows and unicorns with me

 

The only way I can deal with the situation is trying to find some humour in it. Glad I made you chuckle.

[SimonSerenade]

This thread is so negative lol if my dad can pull someone half decent at age 45 anybody can, my dad is a walking corpse with false teeth so I won't give up hope, as far as god is concerned, I gave up on him a long time a go.

[thefooloftheyear]

Bottom line is never let anyone have that much control over you..

 

50?? Old???

 

What an effing joke...

 

I am 48 and NEVER physically felt better in my life..I can do anything I want to and anything ANY kid can do..I am better than I ever was at 25.,..Then, I didnt know shyt all about life. I like women in their 40's..They are no BS. Just find one without a lot of baggage.

 

But people talking about their life being over at 50??

 

TFY

[Mcnulty]

I'm 41, just got my health back after nearly leaving this godly place a year ago...6 operations, oh and losing the love of my life, only for her to walk back into my life 9 months ago...she helped me through so much...then...lost her...self imploded mentally, going back to work after a year was v difficult, met her, realized I was in love with her still, backed off as she had banged my mate for 11 months, been in a deep depression the last 3 months, sent her a heartfelt letter explaining my depression to be ignored and dismissed.

 

Am i, like you giving up Zammo? Am I hell!! Health, you have it, i have it back and I'm damned sure i'm gonna appreciate what i've been given. I tried my best, i was honest with her and she washed her hands of me. I've been so depressed, but I make the effort, I play squash, I go out as much as I can and I haven't took a day off in the 3 months I've been back to work.

 

I'm only here once...one chance...do I say feck it, i give up or do I try, try try??? I try...why? Because I will not be beaten! Having this attitude has got me where?... I have 2 ladies vying for a date because I am trying to live my life, not be beaten by it. I've climbed mountains all over the world, I'll keep climbing this mountain..I may not get to the top, but I'll keep trying, because I will not be beaten by this cruel ****ty world.....think on what I've just said and get some balls man.

[ballycastle]

I have given up now. It is a pointless and futile exercise. Once you reach 50 and find yourself single, the game is up.

 

I have had my fair share of feeling like you, but everyone too has felt angry, bewildered, lost, depressed, hurt, betrayed, humiliated hence why they found LS in the first place. And we are not losers but aiming to be survivors, what other option is there to deal with the hurt?

 

I'm not sure of your circumstances but I think the only thing you can do is find YOURSELF and don't even consider putting anyone else through you sh*t. I have learnt A LOT from reading the posts and threads on LS and happen to think LS forum is the best out there for people in our situation

 

Unfortunately when in the mire of it all its hard to listen to advice. So what I suggest you do is go away, get therapy, read this thread in 3 months time when you might, MIGHT just be feeling like you want to be your own best friend. Because when it comes down to it that's all you've got. Also you might want to look at the choices you make in partners. I found out I made poor choices because all my partners replicated my emotionally deprived alcoholic father so chose ones who subconsciously wouldn't love me back because that's all I knew. Look honestly at your relationship patterns, learn from them so you know what to avoid in the future. And yes, there is a future for you but it will take time. I didn't believe I had a future for me, but now I do. And that's down to time and working on myself.

 

And yes you are right about the FACTS of being alone, because being in a relationship is about being HAPPY with yourself and unfortunately no one is going to want to invest or spend time with someone who believes the contrary. It would be like trying to get a vegetarian to eat a Big Mac.

 

So I listened to the advice on here and am working on myself, something I don't think I have really honestly done in the 45 years on this planet, always hoping I could plug my self worth with/by a partner, but I realise that only I can do that. Is it hard? yes, lonely? damn right. But I know as I make the effort to make NEW memories instead of pining about the old ones I can move on.

 

I'm not going to say go to the gym either, I go, but I loathe it, but I am glad I do 4/5 times a week for the results because I have to be KIND to myself. Be kind to yourself.

[Renard99]

Once you reach 50 and find yourself single, the game is up.

 

You quote that as a fact....... I'd like to know your source and the evidence behind it please. I need to supply this evidence to my 66 year old neighbour who's just got married.... oh and my 54 year old uncle who's just met a nice new lady. I need them to see that it can't be done, that they were doomed the second they hit 50 and that they should have given up on life years ago.

 

In fact, it should be published because, according to 2011 census data, 14.2% of all marriages involve people between the age of 50 and 64, and, a further 14% involve people over 65. They need to be told they're wasting their time!

 

I turn 30 next week.... It's rather depressing to know that I only have 20 years of life left in me.

Edited July 10, 2013 by Renard99

[Frank13]

It is all just platitudes and empty words. At 50 I know as a FACT I will never find someone else now. It is too late. I am too old now. So I suck it up and live or rather exist one day at a time now. Ok, if you are 30 you have a chance at 50, no chance. None. So it really grates me with the " you will find someone better cr*p "

 

I have to agree. I think a lot of reasons people disagree is because they are young and have hope. Hope is good as it keeps you going. However, once you reach 50, the reality that often times you will not find someone better, or anyone at all sinks in.

 

At 50 you are looking old and being old eliminates you from 98% of potential people. If you don't think 50 is old, ask a 25 year old if she would date even a 40 year old and see her reaction.

[Frank13]

I have given up now. It is a pointless and futile exercise. Once you reach 50 and find yourself single, the game is up.

 

The game is actually up sooner. It just takes until 50 to realize it.

 

Human beings are complicated.

 

For two people to actually have a good long term relationship is as likely as dropping two identical wine glasses on the floor and having them both break in the exact same way so that the half the pieces of each glass can be swapped with each other and you can still put both glasses back together.

 

That's why someone always wants out of a relationship and someone always wants them back.

[Frank13]

I'm 41, just got my health back after nearly leaving this godly place a year ago...6 operations, oh and losing the love of my life, only for her to walk back into my life 9 months ago...she helped me through so much...then...lost her...self imploded mentally, going back to work after a year was v difficult, met her, realized I was in love with her still, backed off as she had banged my mate for 11 months, been in a deep depression the last 3 months, sent her a heartfelt letter explaining my depression to be ignored and dismissed.

 

Am i, like you giving up Zammo? Am I hell!! Health, you have it, i have it back and I'm damned sure i'm gonna appreciate what i've been given. I tried my best, i was honest with her and she washed her hands of me. I've been so depressed, but I make the effort, I play squash, I go out as much as I can and I haven't took a day off in the 3 months I've been back to work.

 

I'm only here once...one chance...do I say feck it, i give up or do I try, try try??? I try...why? Because I will not be beaten! Having this attitude has got me where?... I have 2 ladies vying for a date because I am trying to live my life, not be beaten by it. I've climbed mountains all over the world, I'll keep climbing this mountain..I may not get to the top, but I'll keep trying, because I will not be beaten by this cruel ****ty world.....think on what I've just said and get some balls man.

 

You are 41, not 50.

[esteem-jam]

For two people to actually have a good long term relationship is as likely as dropping two identical wine glasses on the floor and having them both break in the exact same way so that the half the pieces of each glass can be swapped with each other and you can still put both glasses back together.

Nice example. If you recognize yourself as too nice or too attached, then dont drop your glass. Enter the RS with a secret agenda, whatever happens, I will keep my glass, she may drop it, but at least I will be left with something. You dont have to marry next girl right away. Be selfish, try, when you will have a chance.

[thefooloftheyear]

I have to agree. I think a lot of reasons people disagree is because they are young and have hope. Hope is good as it keeps you going. However, once you reach 50, the reality that often times you will not find someone better, or anyone at all sinks in.

 

At 50 you are looking old and being old eliminates you from 98% of potential people. If you don't think 50 is old, ask a 25 year old if she would date even a 40 year old and see her reaction.

 

This is such ridiculous garbage....

 

If you are 50 years old what the hell do you want with a 25 year old? Ill say that despite knowing that even at 48 I could likely land a 28-34 year old if I wanted to..Im in great shape, youthful, have all my hair, my dick works as it should..etc..

 

What about all of the available over 40 women? Are they worthless? I find a hell of a lot of attractiveness in mature women...They are on the same level and know what they want..They are also smarter and more established in their careers..Let the 20 somethings flounder with the other 20 something guys..

 

Its quite shocking that people can actually say this crap and be serious about it..

 

TFY

Edited July 10, 2013 by thefooloftheyear

[GorillaTheater]

This is such ridiculous garbage....

 

Unsurprising, considering his longest thread at LS is entitled "Why don't some women at work look at me?".

[CorridorE]

I have to agree. I think a lot of reasons people disagree is because they are young and have hope. Hope is good as it keeps you going. However, once you reach 50, the reality that often times you will not find someone better, or anyone at all sinks in.

 

At 50 you are looking old and being old eliminates you from 98% of potential people. If you don't think 50 is old, ask a 25 year old if she would date even a 40 year old and see her reaction.

 

Maybe at 50 98% of the 25 year olds are eliminated, yes... but there is plenty of potential if you are after other middle-aged women.

[Zammo25]

The game is actually up sooner. It just takes until 50 to realize it.

 

Human beings are complicated.

 

For two people to actually have a good long term relationship is as likely as dropping two identical wine glasses on the floor and having them both break in the exact same way so that the half the pieces of each glass can be swapped with each other and you can still put both glasses back together.

 

That's why someone always wants out of a relationship and someone always wants them back.

 

At LAST someone who speaks sense. I will tell you at 50, going bald, poor finances and poor prospects I am now on the relationship rubbish tip. That is a cast iron FACT. No point in deluding myself. I have accepted it. Sure it hurts like hell as I have a lot to offer and have a big heart but I have NO chance so why even try now ? It is futile. The harsh facts are a Woman wants a Man to be able to bring something to the table, usual materialistic and if you are not able to you are not even on the radar. Some people have it all, they have good finances and good looks and don't even have to try. I cannot compete with these Men so why even try it will only ever lead to disappointment. As a case in point my last ex is with a Man who can provide all I can't, she is happy as a pig in **** 1 year after my sorry arse was kicked to the curb with Mr Perfect waiting in the wings to take over IMMEDIATELY. I know my place in life and I will live one day at a time now for however long that may be but I know for a 100% certainty I will never find someone else again.

[Eivuwan]

At LAST someone who speaks sense. I will tell you at 50, going bald, poor finances and poor prospects I am now on the relationship rubbish tip. That is a cast iron FACT. No point in deluding myself. I have accepted it. Sure it hurts like hell as I have a lot to offer and have a big heart but I have NO chance so why even try now ? It is futile. The harsh facts are a Woman wants a Man to be able to bring something to the table, usual materialistic and if you are not able to you are not even on the radar. Some people have it all, they have good finances and good looks and don't even have to try. I cannot compete with these Men so why even try it will only ever lead to disappointment. As a case in point my last ex is with a Man who can provide all I can't, she is happy as a pig in **** 1 year after my sorry arse was kicked to the curb with Mr Perfect waiting in the wings to take over IMMEDIATELY. I know my place in life and I will live one day at a time now for however long that may be but I know for a 100% certainty I will never find someone else again.

 

Even if you personally don't think you can find someone at 50 doesn't mean other people can't.

[Zammo25]

Even if you personally don't think you can find someone at 50 doesn't mean other people can't.

 

Sure if they have looks, money, prospects, a future. If not it is hopeless.

[ballycastle]

At LAST someone who speaks sense. I will tell you at 50, going bald, poor finances and poor prospects I am now on the relationship rubbish tip. That is a cast iron FACT. No point in deluding myself. I have accepted it. Sure it hurts like hell as I have a lot to offer and have a big heart but I have NO chance so why even try now ? It is futile. The harsh facts are a Woman wants a Man to be able to bring something to the table, usual materialistic and if you are not able to you are not even on the radar. Some people have it all, they have good finances and good looks and don't even have to try. I cannot compete with these Men so why even try it will only ever lead to disappointment. As a case in point my last ex is with a Man who can provide all I can't, she is happy as a pig in **** 1 year after my sorry arse was kicked to the curb with Mr Perfect waiting in the wings to take over IMMEDIATELY. I know my place in life and I will live one day at a time now for however long that may be but I know for a 100% certainty I will never find someone else again.

 

Not everyone is shallow you know.

 

You say she kicked you to the curb with a man who provide what you can't...You say it was money/good looks that propelled her into the arms of another man.

 

I bet it wasn't. I bet it was because you were miserable. Let's face it and I know this sounds harsh, but I bet you were like this BEFORE you were with your ex. Because there is no way in the world your ex turned you so bitter and angry. You were like that before and had issues before. It's not down to her and looks/money that's down to YOU.

 

When will you start doing things TO YOU so a potential partner sees YOU as a HAPPY person.

 

When women get together, they DONT complain that their man is handsome/rich, they complain he isn't sensitive/good listener/kind/attentive.

 

Are you any of those things NOW?

 

Are you??????

 

I seriously doubt it.

 

You need to be seriously HONEST with yourself like I had to be and the others on this site so you can become the best you can be to stand even a cat whiskers CHANCE of another HUMAN BEING wanting to BE with you.

 

If you don't then, yes YOU WILL BE ALONE.

 

FACT

[Zammo25]

Not everyone is shallow you know.

 

You say she kicked you to the curb with a man who provide what you can't...You say it was money/good looks that propelled her into the arms of another man.

 

I bet it wasn't. I bet it was because you were miserable. Let's face it and I know this sounds harsh, but I bet you were like this BEFORE you were with your ex. Because there is no way in the world your ex turned you so bitter and angry. You were like that before and had issues before. It's not down to her and looks/money that's down to YOU.

 

When will you start doing things TO YOU so a potential partner sees YOU as a HAPPY person.

 

When women get together, they DONT complain that their man is handsome/rich, they complain he isn't sensitive/good listener/kind/attentive.

 

Are you any of those things NOW?

 

Are you??????

 

I seriously doubt it.

 

You need to be seriously HONEST with yourself like I had to be and the others on this site so you can become the best you can be to stand even a cat whiskers CHANCE of another HUMAN BEING wanting to BE with you.

 

If you don't then, yes YOU WILL BE ALONE.

 

FACT

 

You know nothing. She was very low when I met her, on med's. She had been through a lot herself in recent years. I got her back on track, happiest she had been for years and after she was strong again, moved onto a guy with better prospects. I was in reality a " stepping stone ".

[Eivuwan]

You know nothing. She was very low when I met her, on med's. She had been through a lot herself in recent years. I got her back on track, happiest she had been for years and after she was strong again, moved onto a guy with better prospects. I was in reality a " stepping stone ".

 

You know what, someone used me as a stepping stone and I'm 24... Could happen to anyone.

[Zammo25]

You know what, someone used me as a stepping stone and I'm 24... Could happen to anyone.

 

It is still very upsetting though whatever age you are and can make you bitter. She also did something horrible after we had split up and it eats away at me.