Can being single for too long become unhealthy?

[ltjg45]

In a way he is right, though, it is a kind of death sentence... because the chances of me finding a woman who doesn't get turned off by a 25 year old man with no experience is very slim. It signals a huge red flag and she'll think there must be something seriously wrong with him. This is just the way it is.

 

 

18 is young. 21 is young. But 25 isn't.

 

25 is young.

 

Just that 25 and no experience with women or sex isn't young in this new dating game that society has made for the new hook-up/casual sex era we are in.

[Pompeii]

Everyone starts somewhere. 25 is young, and by no means a death sentence if you don't have experience by then. Making the attempt is what is going to get him past this. An attempt to approach women and connect with them.

 

And fail miserably. I still stick with what I've said. Most people who don't have the base established at younger ages simply don't have what it takes to succeed and be on a normal life track at later ones.

 

25 is young, but when it comes to experiences with the opposite sex that is very old/late. Most people have their first encounters at the ages of 15/16/17, whatever that may be. That's almost a decade later. Let's not bull**** this.

[MustGetRich]

25 is young, but when it comes to experiences with the opposite sex that is very old/late. Most people have their first encounters at the ages of 15/16/17, whatever that may be. That's almost a decade later. Let's not bull**** this.

 

Exactly. Couldn't have said it better.

 

 

At 25 there's no way back. It's a lost cause.

[MustGetRich]

Just because you don't have love doesn't mean you can't live a good life. Of course, it does make it harder because now the only person you can ever rely on is yourself and you will soon stick to that belief the longer this happens.

 

 

I agree with this, though. Good point. Sundevil try to remember what he just said. It's never worth killing yourself.

[Darkmaybehandsome]

And fail miserably. I still stick with what I've said. Most people who don't have the base established at younger ages simply don't have what it takes to succeed and be on a normal life track at later ones.

 

25 is young, but when it comes to experiences with the opposite sex that is very old/late. Most people have their first encounters at the ages of 15/16/17, whatever that may be. That's almost a decade later. Let's not bull**** this.

 

Utter crap

 

How many women have there been who have just laid back in bed and said to themselves the guy they are with awful in bed and even tolerate the noises and grunts and yet still stick with their guys.

 

There are many women with bad sex lives but does that mean they automatically end the relationship.

 

The point being is on a social level if guys can communicate with women holds precedence rather than raw sexual experience.

Edited July 16, 2013 by Darkmaybehandsome

[Sun Devil]

Maybe some people can be happy being single. I am not one of them. I am at the point were suicide coould be a permanent solution to a permanent problem.

[Socks At Play]

25 is young, but when it comes to experiences with the opposite sex that is very old/late. Most people have their first encounters at the ages of 15/16/17, whatever that may be. That's almost a decade later. Let's not bull**** this.

At 25 there's no way back. It's a lost cause.

 

As long as a guy isn't selfish and the woman has a dab of patience I don't see the mountain that you guys think has to be climbed. How about the guy who gets laid at 15 and then doesn't get it again for ten years? Is he ****ed too? (Or rather, not ****ed.)

[Darkmaybehandsome]

Maybe some people can be happy being single. I am not one of them. I am at the point were suicide coould be a permanent solution to a permanent problem.

 

Are there not things in life other than women that you can enjoy? Isnt life still worth living.

 

Work hard and you could become rich and enjoy all sorts of experiences from travel to food etc

 

By the way, from you posts you do give the impression that women are MISSION IMPOSSIBLE.

 

Could you please elaborate on how you have gone about trying to get a partner?

 

What ways have you been approaching women?

 

What sort of conversations or flirting do you do?

[Pompeii]

How about the guy who gets laid at 15 and then doesn't get it again for ten years? Is he ****ed too? (Or rather, not ****ed.)

 

Outlier, that usually doesn't happen. People who get laid at that age usually have a hookup here or there and will probably have a few boyfriends/girlfriends along the way. The earlier you have sex within a reasonable amount of time, it usually indicates your desirability to the opposite sex. Is it any shocker that attractive/hot girls are always taken or have a FWB on the side when they are single? It shouldn't be.

 

Utter crap

 

How many women have there been who have just laid back in bed and said to themselves the guy they are with awful in bed and even tolerate the noises and grunts and yet still stick with their guys.

 

There are many women with bad sex lives but does that mean they automatically end the relationship.

 

The point being is on a social level if guys can communicate with women holds precedence rather than raw sexual experience.

 

 

Eventually it will take its toll on the relationship. Women usually don't like telling guys what to do when it comes to relationships and sex I've seen. Hell, one girl I know, probably one of the nicest ones I've known dumped her boyfriend after a couple months because he was a "consistently lousy lay".

[KathyM]

And fail miserably. I still stick with what I've said. Most people who don't have the base established at younger ages simply don't have what it takes to succeed and be on a normal life track at later ones.

 

25 is young, but when it comes to experiences with the opposite sex that is very old/late. Most people have their first encounters at the ages of 15/16/17, whatever that may be. That's almost a decade later. Let's not bull**** this.

There's plenty of late bloomers out there that manage to find relationships later on. I know some personally.

[shyguy0714]

While I did loose my virginity at 19, I became very independent and dated very little in my 20s. I dated for 3 different girls for a total maybe one year combined. I never dated anyone when I was the age 25-32. I really thought I was too independent and something was wrong with me where there was no way I could ever end up in a long term relationship

 

I then met a sweetheart last year. We dated for about a year, and unfortunately it did not work (which is why I am now on this forum) There were some rocky times in there for both of us during that time, but plenty of enjoyable times, and it proved I am capable of dating and loving another person. In other words, don't give up

[Sun Devil]

Darkmaybehandsome, I have many hobbies, but without a special someone to do it with, it is not as fun. When you are hungry, the only cure is food. That is the situation I am in. The only way things will get better is if I find a girlfriend

[Socks At Play]

Outlier, that usually doesn't happen. People who get laid at that age usually have a hookup here or there and will probably have a few boyfriends/girlfriends along the way. The earlier you have sex within a reasonable amount of time, it usually indicates your desirability to the opposite sex. Is it any shocker that attractive/hot girls are always taken or have a FWB on the side when they are single? It shouldn't be.

 

You seem to be basing all of your comments on an erroneous assumption that people hit some sort of maximum "desirability" somewhere before age 25 and then it's only downhill from there.

 

Are you saying at age 32 my "desirability" is defined by the bullied fat guy I was a decade and a half ago in high school? That doesn't make any sense.

[Pompeii]

You seem to be basing all of your comments on an erroneous assumption that people hit some sort of maximum "desirability" somewhere before age 25 and then it's only downhill from there.

 

Are you saying at age 32 my "desirability" is defined by the bullied fat guy I was a decade and a half ago in high school? That doesn't make any sense.

 

*Sigh* I never said that. Obviously, most people don't look as good as they did when they were younger as they age but I never said anywhere that anyone below 25 has it easier because they have physical attraction on their side. I said that as one ages, they become stuck in their habits. A guy who is a virgin at 25 most likely isn't going to be that great with women as compared to the guy who has been scoring girls left and right since he was 16. A guy who is a virgin at 25 will probably find a wife or girlfriend of some sort but he certainly isn't going to become a player. It's easier how to teach a 9 year old kid how play football effectively than it is to teach a 29 year old. There are rare exceptions, of course. A bit of reading comprehension would do you good.

[Socks At Play]

A guy who is a virgin at 25 most likely isn't going to be that great with women as compared to the guy who has been scoring girls left and right since he was 16.

 

Perhaps. It seems there are plenty of experienced guys who suck in bed, too (see the sex forum here.)

 

A guy who is a virgin at 25 will probably find a wife or girlfriend of some sort but he certainly isn't going to become a player. It's easier how to teach a 9 year old kid how play football effectively than it is to teach a 29 year old. There are rare exceptions, of course. A bit of reading comprehension would do you good.

 

I doubt many 25 year old virgins are looking to become a player, so I have no clue what that has to do with anything.

 

Ad hominem attacks are not explaining your baseless assertions that being a "virgin at 25 is pretty much a death sentence" and that overall "desirability" in this realm is indicated based on who you can have sex with when you are young.

[Pompeii]

I doubt many 25 year old virgins are looking to become a player, so I have no clue what that has to do with anything.

 

Ad hominem attacks are not explaining your baseless assertions that being a "virgin at 25 is pretty much a death sentence" and that overall "desirability" in this realm is indicated based on who you can have sex with when you are young.

 

I fail to see any ad hominem attacks in my original assertions. I just said you lack reading comprehension because you fail to understand my overt points. That is a fact, not an ad hominem. I've said it once and I'll say it again for the last time: habits are hard to break. If a guy isn't good with women now, it's likely he won't be later. You don't just get up one day and start attracting lots of women. If you want to accidentally stumble into a less-than-satisfactory relationship that's not based on true attraction, then that's ultimately your prerogative.

 

I still believe that people who acclimated to the opposite sex (men in particular) from early ages are more likely to get into relationships easier than someone who started late. Many of my friends lost their virginity at 15-16 and how have great girlfriends because it was just part of the process for them. My two brothers lost their virgnities in their teens and have never been without female company of their choosing (just sex or relationship). I honestly do not know many men who are over the age of 25 and have been able to break the cycle without a great amount of willpower and conscious effort on their part.

 

It is much harder to get girls at later ages when you have less experience because you will need tighter "game". You're starting from square one against women who have seen lies, bull****, etc. to get them to take off their pants when they were younger. They fall for less things. Tell a girl she's beautiful at 16, she swoons. Tell her at 26, she rolls her eyes and says, "ok". Losing your virginity is much easier at earlier ages.

 

A lot of guys who are 25 want to "find that special girl" but as the saying goes "you don't get to the princess without slaying a couple of dragons". Some guys get lucky and find the princess early on, others keep running into an endless stream of dragons. There are many guys at 25 who want to screw a lot of women and make up for lost time. My brother knows a guy who lost his virginity at 28 and another at 30. The former one took him two years to get into a relationship, two years to get up to speed and another year to really start getting women into bed. The latter ended up marrying a woman and she divorced him a year later, now he is single.

[Beast_117]

^ This is true.

 

Everyone I know from high school that was dating/having sex at 15-17 are all in relationships,doing casual sex,etc right now.

 

Not that i care anymore but if I was to ever become interested again in trying to lose my virginity,get a gf,etc then I would have a ridiculously impossible time...and it would only get harder as I get older.I'm almost 22 and completely inexperienced with women...there's 15 year old dudes that have better "game" than me lol..I know to women this may not seem that bad but to guys it's devastating to know that you're "that guy" that's never been with a woman.When you're young you never think it's gonna be you in the situation..you go year after year thinking "well maybe this year will be different" and then before you know it you're 25 and still a virgin.

 

I know how it feels, I've been there.

[ImSoPathetic]

I've been single my entire life at 29. No female ever showed any interest in me. At this point I don't care who the female was I'd take any that showed interest in me.

[Moe'sTavern]

^ This is true.

 

Everyone I know from high school that was dating/having sex at 15-17 are all in relationships,doing casual sex,etc right now.

 

Not that i care anymore but if I was to ever become interested again in trying to lose my virginity,get a gf,etc then I would have a ridiculously impossible time...and it would only get harder as I get older.I'm almost 22 and completely inexperienced with women...there's 15 year old dudes that have better "game" than me lol..I know to women this may not seem that bad but to guys it's devastating to know that you're "that guy" that's never been with a woman.When you're young you never think it's gonna be you in the situation..you go year after year thinking "well maybe this year will be different" and then before you know it you're 25 and still a virgin.

 

I know how it feels, I've been there.

I'm 27. It's not that big of a deal; and like you I don't really care much either. Do I have an uphill battle? Perhaps. But hey, no one said life was easy, Am I right?

[Beast_117]

I'm 27. It's not that big of a deal; and like you I don't really care much either. Do I have an uphill battle? Perhaps. But hey' date=' no one said life was easy, Am I right? [/quote']

Well yeah it's no big deal to us since we don't really care much for it.But to others it sucks being in that situation.And it really does feel like an uphill battle once you start dwelling on it too much.

[Ryan9]

Go out to a bar and get drunk and talk to people. That's why bars exist.

 

 

Put it this way, bars don't exist for 'Happy couples'. They exist for single people.

 

 

 

You people have to be joking. Get over yourselves. Go out and buy 3 beers and quit crying.

[Saraswati57]

I think it can be unhealthy, partially because after a certain point others don't even take your problems seriously.

[Nikki Sahagin]

Op my current bf was a virgin until he was 27. He was always too shy with women.

 

When we first had sex i could tell he was inexperienced but ive enjoyed teaching him a d he is an amazing kisser.

 

So long as you are comfortable with a woman and you have the right chemistry the sex will figure itself out.

 

Ignore what other people are saying on here. Coming from a girl with an inexperienced bf its just bs.

 

Not every girl wants a guy who has been around the block a hundred times.

[Pompeii]

Op my current bf was a virgin until he was 27. He was always too shy with women.

 

When we first had sex i could tell he was inexperienced but ive enjoyed teaching him a d he is an amazing kisser.

 

So long as you are comfortable with a woman and you have the right chemistry the sex will figure itself out.

 

Ignore what other people are saying on here. Coming from a girl with an inexperienced bf its just bs.

 

Not every girl wants a guy who has been around the block a hundred times.

 

 

It's not "BS". I know guys who have been rejected by girls for being virgins. Girls may not want a guy who has "been around the block a hundred times" but they certainly don't want a guy who has no idea of what he's doing either.

[Arabella]

It's not "BS". I know guys who have been rejected by girls for being virgins. Girls may not want a guy who has "been around the block a hundred times" but they certainly don't want a guy who has no idea of what he's doing either.

 

We've been over this, Pompeii. This may be true among your college buddies, it's not true in the real world after that

 

I've said it before and I'll say it again... I will take a virgin over someone who's had casual sex (any amount of it) ANY DAY, all other factors being equal.