I found he was cheating

[youngnlove89]

I will get better one day right?

[Simon Phoenix]

I will get better one day right?

 

If you are active in that pursuit, yes. But it's not going to happen by magic.

[LostGirl11]

No, I only drank coffee today. I have no appetite and my anxiety is bad. My stomach keeps sinking and I get this chill that runs through my body when I think about him and her.

 

I thought about it today. Fact is, I haven't been the most honest person either.

 

I've been doing exactly what he has been doing. Leaving out details. I've hung out with a couple of guy friends and one stayed the night (slept on the couch) and another one came over and watched a movie with me (we didn't sit next to each other). It was all purely platonic. I didn't tell my boyfriend those little details because I knew he would freak out and take it the wrong way. It would create a fight, grow insecurity for him, and cause drama. So I kept it from him. I've also been chatting with an ex. We were never bf/gf but dated. Just like his situation. We haven't hung out yet, but I didn't tell my ex about this guy because he would wonder. Me and this guy I used to date are just friends and nothing more. We just chat every once and awhile and haven't gotten the chance to hang out yet because of scheduling conflicts. I never planned to tell my boyfriend about it because I didn't think it would be a big deal. But if he wanted to meet him, I would love to make that happen. The guy is a really cool guy, he'd like him. We both are just friendly and realized back then that we didn't have that "spark" but got along as friends instead.

 

So is this calling the kettle black?

 

Yeah, you're in the wrong too, but don't try to justify what he's been doing. This should prove to you that neither of you have a lot respect for eachother and that your relationship isn't at all healthy. It all sounds very intimate, even if they haven't had sex. Seriously, this isn't how a relationship should be, your family and friends probably see it as one big joke

 

Hope you've eaten today.

[mercuryshadow]

I didn't know you were with a beater. I'm so sorry. That's awful. I'm glad you got away from that. But what worries me is how you say you still miss him and stuff. Is that how we will be forever? Missing the people that treated us wrong while they continue their merry way and be happy?

 

I can say from my experience that those feelings took different form for me. I stopped desperately missing him and felt at peace with the way things were. And if I have any love for him, it's a basic, compassionate love, not a romantic love. When I left, I took my heart back and saved it for someone who deserved it.

 

Your feelings WILL change. On some level, you may still have love for him after time, but it won't be a desperate feeling. It won't drive you to feel anxious or lonely or sick. It will be a peaceful feeling.