70% of the Women go for 15% of the Men?

[carhill]

If the title is true, the goal is to be one of the 15%, presuming one's goal in life is to have 'women go' for one. Tempest in a teapot, IMO. Bought into that teapot for a few decades.

[Pompeii]

Absolutely. Distilled in its purest form in HS/college.

 

Yeah, I see similar things all the time and I'm in college.

[Pompeii]

No. People - well, MOST people except for people on LS for some reason - don't think in percentages and statistics.

 

"Oooh, that guy smiled at me. Too bad he rates solidly in the 35th percentile. Maybe I will get his number in case I am still single when I'm 30."

 

It doesn't work that way. It's about connection and chemistry. Yeah, there will always be shallow women who only want arm candy, and shallow men who only want arm candy, but that's not the majority.

 

Your terrible attempt at attempting to be witty completely missed the mark of what he was saying. It's not a conscious attempt at thinking in "statistics" its something that happens without much thought. Let's face it: most guys don't turn women on in a sexual manner. You have to be above average or stand out in some way if you want a girl to get to know you. These are the aesthetic, the socially charismatic, the men with status, the men with money. Most average guys just don't get the juices flowing for a woman. More guys have to try much harder at getting attention than a woman ever will for a man's. And that's life.

 

You don't get to be the leader of the free world without being alpha.

 

Uh yeah, I'd like to get one thing out of the way right now... If we're going to use this stupid terminology, Obama is definitely not an "alpha male". He's consistently demonstrated that he has a terrible constitution compared to other US Presidents. I will agree that Clinton was definitely the last "alpha" President we had. Bush was pretty much a semi-functional invalid for 8 years.

 

But Obama is definitely not alpha. He's way too soft and he's definitely not a charmer. Obama is "alpha" by way of his position but he is a "beta" as a person. Jimmy Carter was "beta" too, as was Nixon.

Edited July 16, 2013 by Pompeii

[MrCastle]

Some people take the term alpha too seriously. It doesn't mean grizzly, wild men who don't bathe or shave and eat raw meat with their bare hands.

 

Alphas are men who take charge. Who exude confidence. Are assertive. Keep a level head when problems arise. Obama does all of that and is most certainly alpha.

 

Alpha doesn't mean he has to go rambo and shoot up congress in bloody mayhem when they don't pass his bills. He has to work with people on both sides of the political spectrum. Compromising is by no means weak or "beta."

 

How does this pertain to dating? Most women want men who take charge. You hear it in the dating forum. You hear it in the sex forum. You hear it in the relationships forum.

 

Most women want men who lead. This has nothing to do with "aesthetics," like height or muscles, or money or whatever. We're talking masculine traits here.

 

Like I said in my first post, this does not lend itself to only one specific type of man. They come in a variety of shapes and sizes. What they all have in common are classically masculine traits.

[Sith Apprentice]

It's more like 20% of men are screwing 80% of women. There is evidence to back this up.

 

OKCUPID Study: 80% of women only respond to the top 20% of men.Your Looks and Your Inbox « OkTrends

 

Did you know that the median 22 year old woman has TWICE as much sex as the median 22 year old man? You might ask, how is that possible? If a woman's having sex, doesn't that mean a man is having sex at the same time? And thus, shouldn't men be having just as much sex as women? NO...because most men hardly ever get laid, or if they do, it's because they "got lucky." But a small elite group of men get laid ALL THE TIME, and **** LOTS AND LOTS of women! It's evolution at work. Women want the top man...so the top man "pump and dumps" lots of women.

 

Average to above-average guys are considered ugly to most women. That is the sad reality today. Women don't view things in terms of leagues... for THEM. They ALL want, and feel entitled to the best - and pretty much ignore most of the rest. Then when she hits 30 and her SMV is zero she starts looking for an average man to settle down with.

[mesmerized]

It's more like 20% of men are screwing 80% of women. There is evidence to back this up.

 

OKCUPID Study: 80% of women only respond to the top 20% of men.Your Looks and Your Inbox « OkTrends

 

Did you know that the median 22 year old woman has TWICE as much sex as the median 22 year old man? You might ask, how is that possible? If a woman's having sex, doesn't that mean a man is having sex at the same time? And thus, shouldn't men be having just as much sex as women? NO...because most men hardly ever get laid, or if they do, it's because they "got lucky." But a small elite group of men get laid ALL THE TIME, and **** LOTS AND LOTS of women! It's evolution at work. Women want the top man...so the top man "pump and dumps" lots of women.

 

Average to above-average guys are considered ugly to most women. That is the sad reality today. Women don't view things in terms of leagues... for THEM. They ALL want, and feel entitled to the best - and pretty much ignore most of the rest. Then when she hits 30 and her SMV is zero she starts looking for an average man to settle down with.

 

if you went on reading that article, you'd see that women message men who they find average and below average THE MOST and they message the hot guys the least.

 

When you're dumb, you're dumb. Not much you can do I guess.

[charlietheginger]

Obama is not alpha in any way

 

It's sad your perceptions of alphas are skewed

 

Obama gave the order to kill osama bin laden

set time tables to two wars

51% of voting americans put him in power

obama was a senator

that's 100% alpha .....

 

A dooche bag is the guy buying shots with hair gel

And a tight tshirt everyweekend trying to get laid....

 

Real alphas dont chase pussy real alphas run business

Own companies. With the money they make comes power

withl power comes women... No need to chase a true alpha

can wave a little cash , jingle the keys to his bently, take a women to

Dinner and she ether gives him sex or he is onto the next

One. Doctors lawyers alphas know looks dont bring

Women security does. Those guys are dating playboy

Playmates, swimsuit models and beauty queens

[Mme. Chaucer]

If you see a girl with a less than attractive guy, she either couldn't do better than him or she rationalized "Well, he's not good-looking, but I'm attracted to him so I'll give him a break." That's called settling, my friend.

 

What about the possibility that she was attracted to him? Oh yes, you did mention that.

 

Going out with someone to whom you're attracted is NOT "settling," my friend.

 

How many times have we told you jokers that many, many of us don't care so much about how handsome and hot a guy is; there are other things at play that cause us to fall for guys. No, we're not settling or mercifully giving those guys a chance.

 

WE GO OUT WITH THEM BECAUSE WE WANT TO.

[StayBeautiful]

Since I separated from my ex-husband 3 years ago, I've dated men who have ranged in height from 5'6" to 6'5", in body type from seriously overweight to skinny to ripped, from bald to long flowing locks, from kinda odd-looking to panty-dropping handsome.

 

The only thing they had in common was they were intriguing, good company, made me laugh and were great fun.

 

I realise this is probably a genetic mutation on my part and I should present myself immediately for scientific and psychological analysis, but there is a tiny possibility that some of us aren't interested in conventional beauty like you are - what makes us attracted to a man is mostly not what you think it is.

[StayBeautiful]

Wow, another male poster assuming to tell women their own experiences.

 

Or the short reply - "no".

[Eve]

I don't buy the whole alpha/beta thing. I cringe at all that stuff. It probably makes life worse.

 

My criteria is that they are not a twat. Works fine.

 

Take care,

Eve x

[StayBeautiful]

Well if you're a (straight) woman and you only sleep with the good looking guys, you certainly don't speak for me. I can't believe how many people on this forum tell other people "well, this must have happened" or "you must feel like this about it".

[StayBeautiful]

Oooh you're so wrong it's painful

 

Oh and - you = man - http://www.loveshack.org/forums/general/general-relationship-discussion/406469-bizzaro-world-forum-women-dont-ask-about-guys-sexual-history-9.html#post5038868

[T3h L337 d00d]

Girls went for me more than once in my life so I'm a 15% man.

[T3h L337 d00d]

I'm top 15%! Saying I'm a 15% man opens it up to the interpretation I'm claiming to be 85% something other than man.

[Simon Phoenix]

I'm risking coming off as sexist here, but I think some women (not all!) aren't entirely honest in discussions such as this. They give the answers they think we want to hear and not necessarily what they actually feel. What women think they should want and what actually gets them going aren't always the same thing. For some women, they're never the same thing, at least when they are younger.

 

It's the same as those women saying they want the "nice guy who will be sweet to them" and end up going for the edgy a--hole 9 times out of 10 because he brings challenge, adventure and he's bold. Then they complain when that a--hole acts like an a--hole, often to the nice guy who would treat them like a princess. A lot of those same women also complain that there are no guys out there that want them when single because they conveniently don't count the many guys who they don't see as desirable because they are too nice, or too something else negative.

 

I'm not bagging on these women for being attracted to what they are attracted to. Want what you want, but don't say one thing and do another and certainly don't complain about the very factors that make your engine rev. If it wasn't for the complaining, I don't think most men would have issues with the selection process of many of these women. I wouldn't.

 

Anyway, back to the point. Every group of five or more guys that I've been involved with, from high school to college to varying points of adulthood, has one guy who can pick up women effortlessly, while the other four usually have degrees of success varying from completely hopeless to occasionally fruitful, but generally a less than 25 percent success rate.

 

The Casanova of the group seamlessly engages women of all heights, weights, races, occupations, beliefs and they all just eat it up. Heck, the first place I lived post-college the Casanova of our group had an assembly line of women. College girls (I think a high schooler might have been mixed in for effect), milfs, married women, single women, didn't matter. One night we were out and two girls he was hooking up with simultaneously were on the dance floor together eyeing him. The rest of us were sitting there laughing, getting ready for the blowout that was bound to happen. But that smooth son of a gun was able to sweettalk them, moving from one to the other, making out with each of them with the other in sight. It was amazing.

 

Now the non-Casanovas of the group can have girlfriends, many of them do from time to time. But those same girlfriends tend to find the Casanova charming as **** and each of the non-Casanovas in the back recesses of the mind fear that their girlfriend might be into the Casanova. They also are wary bringing sisters, female cousins, etc., around that type of guy because they know his powers. And I'd say that these guys make up 15-20 percent of the male population, with varying degrees of success in that upper echelon. I have no idea what the percentage of women digging these men are, but I'd bet it's well over 50 percent. And I think most men reading this can relate to what I'm talking about to some degree.

 

As for me, I've never been one of the top 15-20 percent and likely never will be. I do notice that interest from females comes in waves for me. If I'm dating someone, it's a hell of a lot easier to get attention from other women even if I don't actually say I'm in a relationship. If I've recently had success with a woman, be it a number, a few dates, sex, etc., other women tend to pick up on that and give me more attention. It's like you all have ESP or something -- or maybe it's just a credit to women's intuition and females having a superior ability to read body language.

 

Cliffs: I respectfully disagree with the women who are so easy to dismiss this dynamic. My personal observations from my teenage, college and adult years bear this dynamic out, though I will say that the percentages might be off. But the majority of women seem to be drawn to the minority of men, and there's nothing wrong with that necessarily. The dynamic fits in terms of evolutionary factors.

[T3h L337 d00d]

That actually paints a very weird picture. Kind of cool, kind of terrifying.

[Simon Phoenix]

To add to my stupidly long post above, what I'm talking about isn't wholly based on looks. While most of the "15-20 percent" of guys are blessed in that category, there are several who are not. While I hate to bring up movies to make my point, check out the movie Sex Drive. The womanizing character (played by Clark Duke) in that movie is chubby, unathletic, has glasses, is not classically handsome by any means. But he's a chick magnet in the film because he's got the attitude and charisma.

[StayBeautiful]

According to that post I could be a man, a lesbian, or assumed to be a lesbian.

 

LOL! Whatever.

[StayBeautiful]

 

Cliffs: I respectfully disagree with the women who are so easy to dismiss this dynamic. My personal observations from my teenage, college and adult years bear this dynamic out, though I will say that the percentages might be off. But the majority of women seem to be drawn to the minority of men, and there's nothing wrong with that necessarily. The dynamic fits in terms of evolutionary factors.

 

I've seen it happen in reverse - the guys very often go for the snooty, mean, b!tch who treats them like a servant, but she's hot so she gets away with it. It happened in my last relationship, except his ex wasn't that hot.... yet, he will always be obsessed with her because she treated him like dirt.

 

The common denominator here is "people" not "men" or "women".

 

Honestly, I wish I could show you pictures of the guy I dated for 6 months last year.... 5'6" and a bit funny looking and VERY overweight, and also the 6'2" handsome guy who was dumped after 3 dates. First was so funny and could have been a stand up, second was a bit boring and had some strange hangups that put me right off him.

 

And the love of my life... well, he was tall, but overweight and had no teeth.

 

Maybe I'm just weird....

[therhythm]

We all do some level of settlement when we get into a relationship, we anyway settle for the best we can find anyway.

When you are young you learn to live your life through experiences and for many the looks and the excitement are the most precious values you look for in the person you are having a relationship with but you at that moment you are also settling for those persons lack of maturity and other flaws they have.

As you grow older/mature your priorities for settling change... for many the looks are not that important anymore but the maturity level and the capacity to support a family... there is nothing wrong with that.

[Eternal Sunshine]

If that is true then so is that 70% of men go for top 15% of women. If they can't get them, they settle for someone more average.

 

Statements like these are utterly meaningless.

[Simon Phoenix]

I've seen it happen in reverse - the guys very often go for the snooty, mean, b!tch who treats them like a servant, but she's hot so she gets away with it. It happened in my last relationship, except his ex wasn't that hot.... yet, he will always be obsessed with her because she treated him like dirt.

 

The common denominator here is "people" not "men" or "women".

 

Honestly, I wish I could show you pictures of the guy I dated for 6 months last year.... 5'6" and a bit funny looking and VERY overweight, and also the 6'2" handsome guy who was dumped after 3 dates. First was so funny and could have been a stand up, second was a bit boring and had some strange hangups that put me right off him.

 

And the love of my life... well, he was tall, but overweight and had no teeth.

 

Maybe I'm just weird....

 

Read the addendum I added after the original post -- looks aren't the only factor that make a guy attractive enough to be in the 15-20 percent. They certainly help, but I'm guessing the 5'6 guy had his share of women before and after you. If not, maybe you are one of the minority, who knows. But yeah, I'm not just talking about looks here.

 

As for guys going after the "hot, snooty, mean" girl because she's hot -- well, excuse my French, but no s--t. Men are much more drawn to visual beauty. If that same girl had the "hot" taken away from her description, I bet your ex would have dropped her a lot quicker. He would have likely hooked up with her unless she was physically repulsive -- we tend to cast a wider net as a whole than women do.

[Simon Phoenix]

If that is true then so is that 70% of men go for top 15% of women. If they can't get them, they settle for someone more average.

 

Statements like these are utterly meaningless.

 

I'd say that 95-99 percent of men go after the top 15 percent of women. But most fail miserably. It's not just the pursuit that is being discussed, it's the successful capture, for lack of a better term.

[Eternal Sunshine]

I'd say that 95-99 percent of men go after the top 15 percent of women. But most fail miserably. It's not the pursuit that is being discussed, it's the successful capture, for lack of a better term.

 

Agreed. I was underestimating