Ooops..I did it again!

[kareena]

Okay so I know that I totally suck and that I made a mistake but for some weird reason I don't feel so bad about it.

 

I'm guna make this as brief as possible,so guess who showed up at my door? Yes,you guessed right! xMM! I really didn't want to break NC but he caught me off guard by just showing up you know? I really didn't know what to do!

 

So I invited him in for a cup of tea(which actually turned out to be a glass of vodka) and I don't know it was so weird,for the first time ever I didn't really feel anything towards him! He was sitting there right in front of me talking about his feelings and I don't know what and all I could hear was YADA YADA YADA BLAH BLAH BLAH!!

 

it kinda felt nice for a change! and he was so sweet saying my duruguyu this and my duruguyu that,obvoiusly we ended up sleeping together but I actually feel good about it,I feel better!

 

because I feel like I kinda got him out of my system,whenever we used to make love before I would always feel so attached and close to him but this time was different it made me realize that I really don't want him back and it was merely physical!

 

I know it was probably a mistake but I don't feel bad about it because it didn't confuse me it just made things clearer in my head, and now I'm the one saying wam bam thank you ma'am(well mister in this case but you get the point) for a change,not him!

[Pierre]

Okay so I know that I totally suck and that I made a mistake but for some weird reason I don't feel so bad about it.

 

I'm guna make this as brief as possible,so guess who showed up at my door? Yes,you guessed right! xMM! I really didn't want to break NC but he caught me off guard by just showing up you know? I really didn't know what to do!

 

So I invited him in for a cup of tea(which actually turned out to be a glass of vodka) and I don't know it was so weird,for the first time ever I didn't really feel anything towards him! He was sitting there right in front of me talking about his feelings and I don't know what and all I could hear was YADA YADA YADA BLAH BLAH BLAH!!

 

it kinda felt nice for a change! and he was so sweet saying my duruguyu this and my duruguyu that,obvoiusly we ended up sleeping together but I actually feel good about it,I feel better!

 

because I feel like I kinda got him out of my system,whenever we used to make love before I would always feel so attached and close to him but this time was different it made me realize that I really don't want him back and it was merely physical!

 

I know it was probably a mistake but I don't feel bad about it because it didn't confuse me it just made things clearer in my head, and now I'm the one saying wam bam thank you ma'am(well mister in this case but you get the point) for a change,not him!

 

 

This form of rationalization is new to me. But, I wish you the best. I think you may be lying to yourself, but time will tell.

God Bless

[whichwayisup]

Okay so I know that I totally suck and that I made a mistake but for some weird reason I don't feel so bad about it.

 

I'm guna make this as brief as possible,so guess who showed up at my door? Yes,you guessed right! xMM! I really didn't want to break NC but he caught me off guard by just showing up you know? I really didn't know what to do!

 

So I invited him in for a cup of tea(which actually turned out to be a glass of vodka) and I don't know it was so weird,for the first time ever I didn't really feel anything towards him! He was sitting there right in front of me talking about his feelings and I don't know what and all I could hear was YADA YADA YADA BLAH BLAH BLAH!!

 

it kinda felt nice for a change! and he was so sweet saying my duruguyu this and my duruguyu that,obvoiusly we ended up sleeping together but I actually feel good about it,I feel better!

 

because I feel like I kinda got him out of my system,whenever we used to make love before I would always feel so attached and close to him but this time was different it made me realize that I really don't want him back and it was merely physical!

 

I know it was probably a mistake but I don't feel bad about it because it didn't confuse me it just made things clearer in my head, and now I'm the one saying wam bam thank you ma'am(well mister in this case but you get the point) for a change,not him!

 

 

Hope you're strong enough to fight him off next time...There WILL be a next time as now he knows he can show up and you'll allow him in your home.

[Artie Lang]

sooo..... would you consider this progress, or what?

[kareena]

I can see coffee and Bailee's...but tea and vodka??? Yucko..well maybe , who knows maybe its good. (J/k)

 

You may feel empowered right now, but remember he is till got what he wanted, his ego and his winky stroked. You may feel great now, but how many more times will you lay with him until those burning love feelings reemerge?

 

I'd go back to nc, hold onto this empowerment you are feeling. Turn it into complete disinterest.

 

Not the actual combination,what I meant to say was what was meant to be a cup of tea and a chat turned into a few drinks and sex.

 

I know it's weird but I do feel empowered in a way because for the first time ever I was able to sit there and see through his lies,I do plan on going back to NC I know he only stopped by because he wanted to get in my pants but what's different this time is that the only reason I let him was because I was also in the mood not because I missed him or felt this overwhelming love towards him like I used to. In other words,pardon the vulgarity but I had an itch and he scratched it. I guess it just feels good to be on the other side for a change.

[kareena]

sooo..... would you consider this progress, or what?

 

In a weird twisted way yes,I want to be indifferent towards him and I feel like I'm getting there. I know this sounds like a very weird logic but I needed to be intimate with him again to see how I felt and I felt nothing,which makes me happy because I know I'm getting over him.

[kareena]

That doesn't really sound like an Oops. Sounds more like an "I knew I was going to get laid the minute I saw him at my door". Or at least when the bottle of vodka came out. But if you consider this progress then good for you! So what are you going to do the next time he shows up uninvited at your door?

 

I guess you're right,I don't really know I haven't really thought that far ahead I'm not really expecting him to show up again for a very very long time I guess I'm just hoping that by then I'd be completely over it that I'd just shut the door literally.

[kareena]

Allow me to apologize for this thread I just read it again and I don't even know what I was thinking when I wrote/did this. I'm feeling very stupid now that I sobered up and this whole thing was wrong and me trying to justify it was just word vomit. That was intoxicated Kareena,sober Kareena does not feel that way. WTH was I thinking!! I really need to lay off the booze,I'm always getting myself into stupid situations. Anyway,I'm sorry I fuc*ed up,I should own it.

[whichwayisup]

So, you messed up. You've owned it and now life goes on.

 

Just don't lie to yourself. You're far from "over it and over him".

 

Be strong and get back into NC mode. And, next time he shows up on your door step, don't answer the door or slam it in his face!

[So happy together]

Allow me to apologize for this thread I just read it again and I don't even know what I was thinking when I wrote/did this. I'm feeling very stupid now that I sobered up and this whole thing was wrong and me trying to justify it was just word vomit. That was intoxicated Kareena,sober Kareena does not feel that way. WTH was I thinking!! I really need to lay off the booze,I'm always getting myself into stupid situations. Anyway,I'm sorry I fuc*ed up,I should own it.

 

 

Aww, sweetheart. Don't kick yourself. If you really feel it's a mistake, just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and move forward. Chin up.

[Artie Lang]

In a weird twisted way yes,I want to be indifferent towards him and I feel like I'm getting there. I know this sounds like a very weird logic but I needed to be intimate with him again to see how I felt and I felt nothing,which makes me happy because I know I'm getting over him.

 

okaaay.

 

it just doesn't make sense that you needed to sleep with him again to gain this insight, kwim?

 

 

are you planning on seeing him again?

[findingnemo]

Allow me to apologize for this thread I just read it again and I don't even know what I was thinking when I wrote/did this. I'm feeling very stupid now that I sobered up and this whole thing was wrong and me trying to justify it was just word vomit. That was intoxicated Kareena,sober Kareena does not feel that way. WTH was I thinking!! I really need to lay off the booze,I'm always getting myself into stupid situations. Anyway,I'm sorry I fuc*ed up,I should own it.

 

Hmmm....I really didn't know what to make of your OP. Now it makes sense.

 

So how do you really feel about sleeping with him again? It seems that even in your OP you realized that he had been using you all along. Did you think that he had come back to use you again?

 

It can be hard to stop the sex. Even when your heart has began to see the person for who he is, you may end up sleeping with him again and again before you end it. Don't beat yourself up. He made his move. What's yours?

[Pierre]

Not the actual combination,what I meant to say was what was meant to be a cup of tea and a chat turned into a few drinks and sex.

 

I know it's weird but I do feel empowered in a way because for the first time ever I was able to sit there and see through his lies

 

And yet you had sex, yeah right. Sure, Hmmmm, best sex ever as usual?

 

 

Folks, best way to break up and forget someone is to have sex.:cool: I hope it works, but I am not buying it. :eek:

 

 

 

Why are you doing this? He will be back for more. Then what? You are making this very easy for this guy.

[Pierre]

In a weird twisted way yes,I want to be indifferent towards him and I feel like I'm getting there. I know this sounds like a very weird logic but I needed to be intimate with him again to see how I felt and I felt nothing,which makes me happy because I know I'm getting over him.

 

How much do you value sex?

[kareena]

How much do you value sex?

 

In what sense?I'm not sure I understand the question.

[kareena]

okaaay.

 

are you planning on seeing him again?

 

No,it was a mistake.

[Pierre]

In what sense?I'm not sure I understand the question.

 

Some women only have sex if they have an emotional connection and commitment. Others don't need those things. Where do you fall?

[kareena]

So how do you really feel about sleeping with him again?

I don't know,I didn't really feel anything(emotionally speaking) it was different and meaningless.

 

It seems that even in your OP you realized that he had been using you all along. Did you think that he had come back to use you again?

 

Yes,I don't know what it is I was trying to prove but at that moment I felt like if I acted differently and wasn't overly emotional and loving when I saw him and after we slept together maybe that will hurt him in some way because he'll realize that things are different and that I don't love him like I used to? and he'll feel bad about losing an awesome person like me? It was stupid but that's what was going on inside mt head.

 

It can be hard to stop the sex. Even when your heart has began to see the person for who he is, you may end up sleeping with him again and again before you end it. Don't beat yourself up. He made his move. What's yours?

 

As bad as this whole thing is,the only good thing is that I know for a fact that I do not wish to sleep with him again. I feel numb towards him and it's a good thing because it's like sleeping with him this time was a turn off.I'm no longer dwelling on our long passionate nights,I'm kinda disgusted.

[kareena]

Some women only have sex if they have an emotional connection and commitment. Others don't need those things. Where do you fall?

 

There should definitely be an emotional connection,I do consider myself to be more conservative when it comes to these things I've only had 3(consensual) sexual partners xMM being the 3rd,I guess that's part of the reason I feel connected to him that way and I just want to detach myself.

[Pierre]

There should definitely be an emotional connection,I do consider myself to be more conservative when it comes to these things I've only had 3(consensual) sexual partners xMM being the 3rd,I guess that's part of the reason I feel connected to him that way and I just want to detach myself.

 

But, you presented the post in the context of detachment.

 

I had sex with my first wife several times after we were divorced. I would go an visit for something and we would have unplanned sex. I felt very awkward afterwards and perhaps gave her false hope of reconciliation. I was not proud about it.

 

 

I think it encourages false hope.

[kareena]

But, you presented the post in the context of detachment.

 

Yeah that's what I meant,I want to detach myself so for some reason it felt like a good idea to go there one last time and see how it felt emotionally.

 

I had sex with my first wife several times after we were divorced. I would go an visit for something and we would have unplanned sex. I felt very awkward afterwards and perhaps gave her false hope of reconciliation. I was not proud about it.

 

 

I think it encourages false hope.

 

I do feel awkward now that some time has passed and I had the time to think about it and process everything. I don't know it all just happened too fast I guess,he kissed me and I couldn't resist so I kissed him back and it just happened. I don't know many things I just know that I don't want to let it happen again.

[Pierre]

it all just happened too fast I guess,he kissed me and I couldn't resist so I kissed him back and it just happened. I don't know many things I just know that I don't want to let it happen again.

 

I think people prone to affairs don't think.:laugh:

 

You know the universal line of newbies: "It Just happened".

 

Seriously, some people think and see boundaries; others cannot do that. I also see a charming innocence and naive point of view in most; truly amazing.

[crederer]

Sounds like he got exactly what he was looking for.