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Been in love with the same person, unrequited, for 6 years.


ForeverAlone28

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ForeverAlone28

Is it possible, out of no control of your own, to be in love with the same person your entire life, even if the feelings are never returned?

 

In the past 11 years, I have only met 3 people that I've been attracted to, both on a physical level, as well as mental and emotional.

 

The first was really easy to get over, the 2nd not so much, but the 3rd...

 

Everything about him fits perfectly, but I don't think he sees the same thing I'm seeing.

 

I am trying to distance myself from him, but it's hard.

 

Even in distance, he is always on my mind. I really don't think I will ever get over this one.

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The reason why you aren't moving on is because you're clinging to the feelings.

 

Not trying to be rude, but you aren't LETTING yourself move on. If you really wanted to move on you would have no qualms about completely cutting this person out of your life, and moving on.

 

 

One of my friends had feelings for me for 4 years and he never told me, because we were best friends. When he did eventually get the guts to tell me, I wasn't interested in being his friend (and I doubt that I ever will be.) He went NC on me for a year. I was hurt and missed my friend but I see why he needed to do it. I didn't pester him, and eventually he came around and we kept being friends.

 

You'll hear stories of people who, 50 years later, are still "in love" with their first love or whoever it is. But they are the exception, not the rule. I think that at the point where you feel like that, you are in love with the IDEA of a person, not the actual person anymore.

 

You say you're 'trying' to distance yourself - but still miss him in distance. How do you know how you feel if you've never successfully detached from him? Distance yourself for a YEAR or MORE and then see if you still have these feelings for him. TRY to move on. Don't just sit there occupying thoughts of how you love and adore him.

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ForeverAlone28

I did distance myself from him for about 2 1/2 years when I liked the 2nd person, then it all came flooding back.

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