snowman4839 Posted July 28, 2013 Share Posted July 28, 2013 I recently reconnected with this girl who I was best friends in middle school before we went to different high schools and never kept up. The next time I remember seeing her after that was around my senior prom where we pretty much just hung out the night, had an ok time, and never talked after that. THEN, another year passes after my first year of college. I worked out a lot, and in short, became a lot more muscular, tan, and generally better looking. She came back to our hometown for a couple weeks to hang out with her old friends which ended up being me through reconnected through our mutual friend. So we made a day to spend together. I got up early excited about everything. She came over and I was a bit nervous but it all just floated away as I remembered why I liked her so much. We had nonstop conversation throughout hanging out for like 8 hours that day and everything went great. We planned on going swimming so she wore a bikini under her clothes, and when we were playing pool (like billiards), I mentioned something about distractions and she stripped to her bikini in the house to "distract" me. Then we went swimming and she had me put lotion on her back (I don't know if that's normal). We spent almost 3 hours in the pool face to face (about a foot away) on the same raft just talking. At some point I playfully slapped her on the butt playing pool and she didn't make anything of it really (no freakout). She kept commenting on how tan I was (I have gotten really tan this summer). She called me muscular in some way at some point in the day. I even eskimo kissed her at some point and she also didn't mind. NOW, after all that, I would normally say she's into me and after reviewing all that, I was planning on trying to kiss her the next time we hang out... HOWEVER... She has a boyfriend that she's apparently been with since like senior year of high school and they're doing the whole long distance thing at college. They're about 7 hours away from each other and he is currently coming to our town to visit her on the weekends she's here. He's a smaller lanky type guy and probably the physical opposite of me. We have similar personalities. I've met him a few times and he's cool but I'll probably never see him outside of hanging out with him through extension. I'm thoroughly confused as to why she would act like she is if she has a boyfriend. Does it seem like she wants a fling before she goes back to school? I'm almost definitely going to try to kiss her the next time I see her but I really want to understand what she's thinking. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted July 28, 2013 Share Posted July 28, 2013 Ew well she sure sounds like a stand-up chick. Her poor bf. Why is she like this? Insecurity, a need for physical attention. That's really it. Pretty typical. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MrTurk Posted July 28, 2013 Share Posted July 28, 2013 I'm almost definitely going to try to kiss her the next time I see her but I really want to understand what she's thinking. She's thinking she wants to cheat on her boyfriend. Thats it Link to post Share on other sites
coltsfan1 Posted July 28, 2013 Share Posted July 28, 2013 She's thinking she wants to cheat on her boyfriend. Agreed, but you should have tried kissing at the pool. Got to strike while the irons hot!! Link to post Share on other sites
MrTurk Posted July 28, 2013 Share Posted July 28, 2013 Ew well she sure sounds like a stand-up chick. Her poor bf. Another reason why its so hard for single people to get a date....because theres way too many people getting with more than 1 person Link to post Share on other sites
Author snowman4839 Posted July 28, 2013 Author Share Posted July 28, 2013 Agreed, but you should have tried kissing at the pool. Got to strike while the irons hot!! Well I'm going to hang out with her all day this wednesday and basically do what I described last week. I don't imagine it could cool off that much in a week. Link to post Share on other sites
silicone Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 She wants her cake and she wants to eat it. Another reason why I'm quickly losing faith on women nowadays. Link to post Share on other sites
coltsfan1 Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 Well I'm going to hang out with her all day this wednesday and basically do what I described last week. I don't imagine it could cool off that much in a week. If she is down to hang again you should be good. But hears a hard truth, this girl is NO keeper. If she will cheat with you she will cheat on you, do whatever you want with her and move on immediately!! Also remember karma is a beeotch!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author snowman4839 Posted July 29, 2013 Author Share Posted July 29, 2013 (edited) If she is down to hang again you should be good. But hears a hard truth, this girl is NO keeper. If she will cheat with you she will cheat on you, do whatever you want with her and move on immediately!! Also remember karma is a beeotch!! I know. I'm living by the adage "if she'll cheat with you, she'll cheat on you." I'm just trying to establish some sort of sexual/romantic feelings in the relationship even it's just for this last week I see her. I'd rather end it like that if I ever see her during a break or visit her at college or something. I mean I don't think we could really make a relationship out of it because our colleges are like 14 hours away (top and bottom of the US) and I'm never doing the long distance thing. I've been wanting to kiss this girl since I met her in 6th grade and I finally got over it through high school and now the same feelings rushed back after we reconnected except she's the one pushing it so i'm all Edited July 29, 2013 by snowman4839 Link to post Share on other sites
BeholdtheMan Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 She wants her cake and she wants to eat it. Another reason why I'm quickly losing faith on women nowadays.Let's be honest here, a lot of people are shallow/seek validation etc. It's not limited to women. People need to realise that good moral character in another person is something to be respected, but it's not something we're sexually attracted to on a biological level. Furthermore, a lot of people don't have strong enough moral character to control their sexual urges. Humans might have lofty philosophical aspirations but on a sexual level, we're no different from other horny mammals (we're probably worse as we're able to reproduce no matter what time of year it is). Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 Don't do it. What you have is a deep seeded fantasy, you've liked this girl for a long time, its obvious you're caught up. But this won't end well. For me, it comes down to this..you're willing to the the dirty on a dude somewhere who's trusts his girl and thinks him and his girl are alright...you have no reason to cry should it ever happen to you. Link to post Share on other sites
eddyctv Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 Oh just go for it. YOLO. You are young, odds are you are NOT going to marry this girl....live a little! Link to post Share on other sites
Tinie Posted July 30, 2013 Share Posted July 30, 2013 Wow. I can't believe the crap some people are suggesting here. YOLO? Seriously? I doubt you'd be saying "YOLO" if some dude was hitting up your woman because you were inexperienced enough to choose a woman with bad boundaries like this chick. OP, have some humanity please. Just because she's dangling her boobies in your face doesn't mean you need to touch them. This girl is a sleazy piece of sh*t and I pity the poor guy who calls himself her boyfriend. You don't need to stoop to her level. She obviously doesn't understand what commitment is. Her boyfriend will hopefully find out and dump her slutty a$$. He should laugh in her face when karma comes back to bite her. Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted July 30, 2013 Share Posted July 30, 2013 I suggest OP reads the multitude of threads about people who've been betrayed and what they go through. If she breaks up with the guy (and you verify this) and by all means do whatever you want but don't do the guy wrong by messing with his girl If you've been cheated on you know it's hell. To this day I don't even entertain flirtatious looks, let alone come ons if I know the woman has a husband or boyfriend Link to post Share on other sites
eddyctv Posted July 30, 2013 Share Posted July 30, 2013 Wow. I can't believe the crap some people are suggesting here. YOLO? Seriously? I doubt you'd be saying "YOLO" if some dude was hitting up your woman because you were inexperienced enough to choose a woman with bad boundaries like this chick. Of course I wouldnt be saying YOLO if someone was trying to score with my woman! But we aren't talking about my woman, are we? You assume to know everything about this woman, her boyfriend, and the thread starter just from a couple of posts. What if the boyfriend is a cheater? Abuser? You dont know anything. If she is flirting with the thread starter, she is clearly not that into her boyfriend. She is young and is looking to have fun. She's not MARRIED or engaged - she's in a long distance relationship, which, as we know, NEVER work. I say GO FOR IT. Link to post Share on other sites
Author snowman4839 Posted August 2, 2013 Author Share Posted August 2, 2013 Well I'm leaving tomorrow and I've asked her 2 or 3 times this week to spend another day together. She's always been busy like the day before our mutual friend (her best friend) left for college one day we were supposed to hang out and then her mom apparently wanted to spend a day with her on another day we were supposed to. Stuff like that. I saw her for a couple times throughout the week anyway with her friend before she left and she acted flirty as always and we had a good time. I don't know if she was legitimately busy or she's just trying to get me to take a hint or what. But I'm leaving tomorrow and she hasn't said anything about hanging out today. At this point I'm really over it. It's not like it could've gone anywhere anyway but it would've been nice to finally kiss her. Aw well. That was a waste of emotional energy. /thread Link to post Share on other sites
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