alwaysrunnin Posted October 30, 2004 Share Posted October 30, 2004 3 year relationship...ex broke up a month ago w/ me, needed her space, time to figure some things out...she's in her first year of law schoool, i know she had been talking to other people and thought what if?? but everyone does that from time to time...i know i have...but i didnt pursue it b/c i loved this girl...but i guess she had to find out...we had a great relationship, though I feel we both pushed each other away in the last week or so...we had our issues, but nothing that couldn't be worked out in the long run. anyway... ex called me the other night, after I went to bed. first time she's called me since i stopped talking to her about two weeks ago (though we did email twice)...said she was lying in bed, had a "weird feeling" (which i later found out was her thinking about how much she hurt me", said she didn't know...didn't know...didn't know... so i called her back the next night, we talked about whatever for 30 minutes then she asked how i was doing...about us. told her i was doing my thing, wasn't going to wait around for her, but i'd be open to going out sometime. kinda lied, but i didnt want to sound all clingy. asked her how she was, she said she was still confused then she got all queit and weird so i was like anyway gotta get to sleep nite. I really want to just ask her out next week, not talk to her all week, and then send her something silly like i used to do when we first met. just want to make it clear to her that'd it be chill, just a dinner or something. or should i wait for her to ask me out again? if there's another dude - i dont have to know - but i might as well feel like i'm on mtv's dismissed and try to put up a fight and show her this is the man she fell in love with...plus i know her...she'll bury herself in her work to forget about me...but then there's the whole don't do a thing crowd...any input?? Link to post Share on other sites
Weird Posted October 30, 2004 Share Posted October 30, 2004 Sounds like she is confused on what she wants. She wants to be back together but she wants to be on her own too. Welcome to the club of crazy confused exes... Link to post Share on other sites
lostNconfusedx10 Posted October 30, 2004 Share Posted October 30, 2004 I'm dealing with just about the same thing man but at least you have the benefit of having her actually talk about your relationship. One of the big rules i have read in different things is not to bring up relationships with her unless she does and then you just follow their lead. I was at the point your are but i kinda let it slip through to the next stage which makes it a whole lot harder. She sounds confused and maybe she just needs to figure it out for herself or maybe she could be influenced. If you do go out, try and do something out of the ordinary routine and something really fun. She might just gain a new interest for you that overpowers some of her doubts as silly as they may be. Link to post Share on other sites
Author alwaysrunnin Posted November 1, 2004 Author Share Posted November 1, 2004 thanks for the advice yall. guess i'll ask her out in my own creative ways that won her over a long time ago...don't have much too lose, i guess...as long as i play it cool...haven't heard from her yet since we talked on the phone on thursday nite (its sun) but didn't expect to hear from her either, at least not until the week sometime...i just hope i didn't shut a door when she asked how i felt, and i said i was fine and doing my thing and wasn't going to wait for her...i hate playing games, but i guess thats how you gotta do it when people are confused. Link to post Share on other sites
beautiful Posted November 1, 2004 Share Posted November 1, 2004 Reality check! Your relationship was not so great, if it was, she would not left! Calls like that are simply to make the dumper feel better because they know they hurt people. My advise to you would be to simply move on! There areplenty of healthy people out there that would not keep you in such drama but than again you the one that keeps the dram going aren't you? An ex is an ex for a REASON! Link to post Share on other sites
Author alwaysrunnin Posted November 4, 2004 Author Share Posted November 4, 2004 well...thanks for the advice yall. I am moving on - I've applied to some grad schools out west and have been talking to a couple of girls- but at the same time, I still really want her back and if she wants to hang out, then I've got nothing to lose except get hurt again but oh well it can't hurt as bad as the first time since I've distanced myself some now too (even though I still love her). I actually asked her out/to hang out on email, she emailed me back a day later then called me that same nite saying she'd be down to hang out a week from now (she said she's really busy w/ law school this week and is going home). she did specify it was just to hang out - she didn't want to call it a date, even though we are going out at night, just the two of us...but I guess that is how it has to start, and why try to put labels on it anyway?...I guess I'll just be myself, and hope she flirts back but I know she is going to be overly catious b/c she knows how much I love her (even though I haven't told her in a month since we broke up, been playin it cool) man i really hope this is the right way b/c i know i screwed up the first week after our break-up then finally decided to go nc (which lasted a week until she emailed me) Link to post Share on other sites
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