Author QuestionLove73 Posted September 10, 2013 Author Share Posted September 10, 2013 do not get involved with an IT professional who specializes in security. We can hack into pretty much anything and I love a challenge. Hang in there. Take care of yourself. Cyber hugs. The funny thing is I am in IT, was a security specialist for years, and I take my own precautions of strong unique passwords, etc. She didn't even lock her phone (not that it was necessary) but then she has the nerve to complain that I lock everything down. SMDH 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author QuestionLove73 Posted September 11, 2013 Author Share Posted September 11, 2013 Update: Well after a really bumpy couple days it seems she is accepting that it's over. Somewhat. I think she is going to make numerous attempts to try to get back to me, but I will not allow it. It also looks like we may end this amicably. She'll stay in the house in the other bedroom for some time as we start to unwind things, and try to find a path forward. Mentally I am over it now. She cheated (and admitted so) so that will be #2 (she had cheated before we were married, but I only found out a year after we were married). I can no longer trust her, and I deserve better. And so does she. She has complained about a number of things that she dislikes and they are deep-rooted things. She will never be truly happy with me. Let me get through this phase! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
revitup Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 Sorry for the revelation, Question. It doesn't make it any easier to have confirmation, I'm sure. My STBXH keeps asking me "How do you know all of this? You are invading my privacy!" I gave him some words of advice - moving forward, do not get involved with an IT professional who specializes in security. We can hack into pretty much anything and I love a challenge. Hang in there. Take care of yourself. Cyber hugs. Okay- we need to talk.How did my STBXWW's "other unknown email address" get into my hotmail acct in such a way that she was getting all that I sent or received ? I know about keyloggers and virus like spy programs but this one was different. It was not showing up anywhere-Geeks couldn't find it and cleaners ect did not get it out.It showed up when I one day by chance did a search of my emails and there it was...I had sent things out and gotten them in but the email itself didn't show this address and the address was nowhere in my contacts and I have never seen it before.The only way I knew it was her was that the name was her same name! Just different email domain. The IT guys got it out but it was not easy. STBXWW was not that smart either. Just wondering REVITUP Link to post Share on other sites
vla1120 Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 Okay- we need to talk.How did my STBXWW's "other unknown email address" get into my hotmail acct in such a way that she was getting all that I sent or received ? I know about keyloggers and virus like spy programs but this one was different. It was not showing up anywhere-Geeks couldn't find it and cleaners ect did not get it out.It showed up when I one day by chance did a search of my emails and there it was...I had sent things out and gotten them in but the email itself didn't show this address and the address was nowhere in my contacts and I have never seen it before.The only way I knew it was her was that the name was her same name! Just different email domain. The IT guys got it out but it was not easy. STBXWW was not that smart either. Just wondering REVITUP There are ways to link email accounts. I'm not saying that happened, but did she have access to your email at any point? Someone probably would have helped her set this up, based on what you are saying. It's feasible, though, and sounds like that is what most likely happened. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 She has of course gone out a few more times since this last post. The last one took the cake last night. She went out at 7p only to come back at 9p pissed off at her male friends she has been hanging with (apparently he was being a jerk). She put on her night clothes, even asked me to go out and buy her ice cream (which I did, the sucka I am). Tried to have sex and I was rejected. I turned over and went to sleep. She then proceeded to go over to this guy's house again to "argue and drink". I think she stayed there past 5am. To boot my daughter had a slight fever when she went to bed, and then turned into a throw-up-fest in my bed. Much to my surprise when I woke up, my wife was not there. We spent a couple hours texting and talking on the phone today. She still does not see it being a problem that she is hanging out as often as as long as she is. I iterated a few times that I cannot be in a relationship where I am feeling like this. She then proceeded to tell me that "well if we split not much would change since I would be paying alimony and child support". Mind you if we split I am going to go for child custody. No way I am walking out of this without my children. I am just exhausted from all this. She just feels she has to have fun and excitement, and to hell with what that does to us (even though she denies that is the case). Your W is cheating. And you opt to buy her ice cream? Man, you need to grow some balls and tell her to move out NOW! You are married to a gal that decided to live the single life... Time to say NO MORE. Link to post Share on other sites
Author QuestionLove73 Posted September 17, 2013 Author Share Posted September 17, 2013 Your W is cheating. And you opt to buy her ice cream? Man, you need to grow some balls and tell her to move out NOW! You are married to a gal that decided to live the single life... Time to say NO MORE. First, there was no confirmation of cheating at that time. Second, I cannot force her to move out. She is on the mortgage. And where is she going to move to? She makes little money, her mom has no room to take her back in. Plus if the divorce gets nasty it would not look good on me to force out my wife with no means. Think strategy. Link to post Share on other sites
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