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We don't have sex.


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Mrsdickinson

We're having sex like once a week, and it's always about his pleasure and not mine. I try it on with him, he pushes me off. I don't think I'm that bad looking, I'm a bigger girl, but he likes that (so he says). I do my hair/make up/ looking good every day. Yet nothing.

 

What 30 year old man would turn his wife down for sex?!:mad:

 

 

He doesn't watch porn, and if he does it will be like once a month, (I watch it daily.), he doesn't masturbate.

 

He had an EA 18 months ago, with a friend & with someone he went school with. Both uglier then me. I am 90% sure he wouldn't of done anything physical. And I'm 200% sure nothing like that is happening now.

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miss_jaclynrae
We're having sex like once a week, and it's always about his pleasure and not mine. I try it on with him, he pushes me off. I don't think I'm that bad looking, I'm a bigger girl, but he likes that (so he says). I do my hair/make up/ looking good every day. Yet nothing.

 

What 30 year old man would turn his wife down for sex?!:mad:

 

 

He doesn't watch porn, and if he does it will be like once a month, (I watch it daily.), he doesn't masturbate.

 

He had an EA 18 months ago, with a friend & with someone he went school with. Both uglier then me. I am 90% sure he wouldn't of done anything physical. And I'm 200% sure nothing like that is happening now.

 

 

 

This paired with your last thread... I am not that shocked.

 

 

 

 

On another note, once a week isn't "not having sex."

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Mrsdickinson
This paired with your last thread... I am not that shocked.

 

 

 

 

On another note, once a week isn't "not having sex."

 

It is to me.

Been together 8 years, 2kids, house, bills ect.. But surely that doesn't decline your sex life?!

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miss_jaclynrae
It is to me.

Been together 8 years, 2kids, house, bills ect.. But surely that doesn't decline your sex life?!

 

:laugh:

 

 

 

 

 

 

He calls you lazy all the time and you are shocked you aren't having as much sex?

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Mrsdickinson
:laugh:

 

 

 

 

 

 

He calls you lazy all the time and you are shocked you aren't having as much sex?

 

?? What do you mean?!

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Eddie Edirol

Either he's too tired for sex, or he is losing his attraction for you. Or he's looking at another woman. Either way, you have to look at the behavior of both of you to find out why he has no interest in pleasing you. How long has sex only been once a week?

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Mrsdickinson
Either he's too tired for sex, or he is losing his attraction for you. Or he's looking at another woman. Either way, you have to look at the behavior of both of you to find out why he has no interest in pleasing you. How long has sex only been once a week?

 

A while, but he suffers with premature ejactuation too, so wondering if to confidence?

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I am BY FAR not defending your husband. Because I read your last post and honestly I think he sounds like a jerk. I dont mean to be harsh. But, no one calls their wife lazy, who loves their wife. Unless there is more to the story than you shared. (and I am not saying there is or there is not)

 

BUT... he is working 6 days a week, according to your last post. and as a carpenter... which is labor intensive. I would be ready to drop at the end of the day.

 

I do not mean to sound rude and mean. It just is what it is. BUT... if he has had an EA before, and rather recently... within the last 2 years, what do you think would stop him from having gone farther with that?

 

If he had an EA how can you be so sure he is not cheating?

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Mrsdickinson
I am BY FAR not defending your husband. Because I read your last post and honestly I think he sounds like a jerk. I dont mean to be harsh. But, no one calls their wife lazy, who loves their wife. Unless there is more to the story than you shared. (and I am not saying there is or there is not)

 

BUT... he is working 6 days a week, according to your last post. and as a carpenter... which is labor intensive. I would be ready to drop at the end of the day.

 

I do not mean to sound rude and mean. It just is what it is. BUT... if he has had an EA before, and rather recently... within the last 2 years, what do you think would stop him from having gone farther with that?

 

If he had an EA how can you be so sure he is not cheating?

 

Because I honestly believe he did it because of the attention she gave him, it wasn't even that bad, just stuff like I really fancy you, I want to bite your butt ect. Stupid immature stuff. She wasn't interested and told me everything, sent me chat logs ect.

 

I'm alot smarter then him with comps and technology, I actually found everything, every time he did it. I have checked loads and there's nothing now.x

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also. being a stay at home mom (i speak from experience) you are probably NATURALLY going to want more attention than normal. possibly. I mean, the entire days conversation is with children (at least that is how it is here).... so when hubby gets home I end up talking his ear off... wanting his attention. I do not always get it. Go read my "confused by his behavior" post. I think it boils down to an imbalance of attention. You have an overabundance of WANTING attn and he just wants to chill. If you are positive its not another woman.

 

What are the chances you can work... to help lessen the load on him? Maybe you could babysit during the day since you are already home. Someone suggested that to me. Although it was not an option in my situation, it may be in yours and a great idea... plus a way to bring in a little extra income... plus something to do with your time. Helps to balance things out.

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SincereOnlineGuy

This all sounds like a mess:

 

 

 

We have two children a 6 year old and a 3 year old. I'm 23 he's 30.

 

 

 

The telling details are there above.

 

 

He still perceives the same dynamics within your relationship that were there way back when.

 

That math doesn't assure that you had to be pregnant by him before your 17th birthday, but chances are maybe you were...

 

 

And now somewhere it says you've been together "8 years" ???

 

Making him 22 and you 15 at the time, approximately.

 

The problem is all him.

 

But nobody ever makes a clear distinction for young and in-love (females, usually) that there is nothing wrong with being the younger partner drawn-to, and infatuated with all of the attention from an older guy. Yet to outside observers there is still nearly always something amiss with the mind of any guy who would go that low age-wise (relative to his own).

 

He wasn't far from 1 1/2 times your age... and his flaws are simply more easily discerned by you now, and that is at the root of all this.

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Mrsdickinson
This all sounds like a mess:

 

 

 

 

 

The telling details are there above.

 

 

He still perceives the same dynamics within your relationship that were there way back when.

 

That math doesn't assure that you had to be pregnant by him before your 17th birthday, but chances are maybe you were...

 

 

And now somewhere it says you've been together "8 years" ???

 

Making him 22 and you 15 at the time, approximately.

 

The problem is all him.

 

But nobody ever makes a clear distinction for young and in-love (females, usually) that there is nothing wrong with being the younger partner drawn-to, and infatuated with all of the attention from an older guy. Yet to outside observers there is still nearly always something amiss with the mind of any guy who would go that low age-wise (relative to his own).

 

He wasn't far from 1 1/2 times your age... and his flaws are simply more easily discerned by you now, and that is at the root of all this.

 

He's 7 years older then me, not exactly 1nhalf times.

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OP

 

I see a bit of a paradox. You claim H calls you lazy and that he has not been a stellar H, furthermore he is a premature ejaculator and all the pleasure is for him, not you. And yet you want to have sex with him very badly.

 

Most women would have reduce desire for the H. What gives? A huge biological drive for sex?

 

Could you explain your drive for sex?

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Mrsdickinson
OP

 

I see a bit of a paradox. You claim H calls you lazy and that he has not been a stellar H, furthermore he is a premature ejaculator and all the pleasure is for him, not you. And yet you want to have sex with him very badly.

 

Most women would have reduce desire for the H. What gives? A huge biological drive for sex?

 

Could you explain your drive for sex?

 

I love him. I like sex, and when it's good, it's very good. I find him super attractive. Maybe I have a high sex drive :-/ x

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I love him. I like sex, and when it's good, it's very good. I find him super attractive. Maybe I have a high sex drive :-/ x

 

OK, so he must be doing something right.

 

Why did you feel the need to degrade your H? Honestly, if you truly felt that way your desire for him would be diminished.

 

At your age sex should be twice a week or most optimally 3 times a week. I suspect, you are home and he is tired. Asking for more sex and putting H down will give you nothing in return.

 

Why do you see yourself with a high sex drive?

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Mrsdickinson
OK, so he must be doing something right.

 

Why did you feel the need to degrade your H? Honestly, if you truly felt that way your desire for him would be diminished.

 

At your age sex should be twice a week or most optimally 3 times a week. I suspect, you are home and he is tired. Asking for more sex and putting H down will give you nothing in return.

 

Why do you see yourself with a high sex drive?

 

I want sex at least once a day. My sex drive has always been high. I'm addicted to porn, and watch it 2x a day. I'm like a man sexually lmao

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I want sex at least once a day. My sex drive has always been high. I'm addicted to porn, and watch it 2x a day. I'm like a man sexually lmao

 

Have you considered the fact that you are hypersexual. Wanting sex more than once a week is OK, but IMHO. porn addiction is not healthy.

 

Why are you addicted to porn?

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I want sex at least once a day. My sex drive has always been high. I'm addicted to porn, and watch it 2x a day. I'm like a man sexually lmao

 

You got a sister? :)

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Yeah why? X

 

WhY?

 

 

The poster is impressed with your hypersexuality and wonders if you have a sister with a similar sex drive.

 

You did not answer why you are addicted to porn. IMHO, you are at risk for having an affair. See a counselor ASAP

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Mrsdickinson
WhY?

 

 

The poster is impressed with your hypersexuality and wonders if you have a sister with a similar sex drive.

 

You did not answer why you are addicted to porn. IMHO, you are at risk for having an affair. See a counselor ASAP

 

Instead of an affair, I am very close to leaving. I have never been so unhappy as I am now. Since we've been married he's changed into a complete arsehole.

 

We didnt even have sex on our wedding night, or the whole week after.

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