linds13 Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 Hi everyone. I'm in the process of getting over a 7 year relationship. While grieving I am trying to work on myself and my happiness. Some goals I have set are being authentic, taking to strangers, trying new hobbies like learning spanish and learning how to play the ukelele and building my own foundation of happiness and boundaries. The problem I'm having is that how I wake up in the morning determines me day. I could wake up happy, grouchy, sad, tired etc. How do I overcome this? I often feel too that after I try something new, it gets old to me real quick and I get bored. Does this mean I don't have depth, heart and passion for life? Will this menality translate to my relationships? How do I overcome this and make myself more consistent and interested in what I'm pursuing. I want to stick with "mind over matter" quote but it's easier said then done. Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
iouaname Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 I think it's awesome that you're taking steps to improve yourself after the end of a relationship! The problem I'm having is that how I wake up in the morning determines me day. I could wake up happy, grouchy, sad, tired etc. How do I overcome this? Well, what determines how you wake up in the morning? Maybe you should consider doing something when you first wake up in the morning that will put you into a good mood right from the start. Hot tea? Hot shower? Watching something or listening to something that will put you in a good mood? Ultimately, you have to be able to become your own mood expert and learn how to put yourself into a good mood. I often feel too that after I try something new, it gets old to me real quick and I get bored. Does this mean I don't have depth, heart and passion for life? No. Everyone has depth and everyone has a heart, and a 'passion for life' is so subjective. You are working on becoming happy and bettering yourself, right? So it seems that you at least are taking an interest in your own life and prioritizing your mental health. As for getting bored with what you try, maybe that just means you aren't that into it? Keep trying new things! If you get bored of it, find something to replace it. Eventually, you'll find the things that you really enjoy and they will stick. Will this menality translate to my relationships? You were in a 7 year relationship. That's a pretty long time, so my guess would be no. The best way to become more self-disciplined is to set goals and see them through. The thing is, if you're working on bettering yourself and finding things you love, then don't set a goal that is stressing you out or making you unhappy. You should create a bunch of little goals to help you as stepping stones, but your overall goal should be to be happy, so keep that in mind as you are trying to reach your small goals. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
SpiralOut Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 (edited) The problem I'm having is that how I wake up in the morning determines me day. I could wake up happy, grouchy, sad, tired etc. How do I overcome this? I say set up mini-events throughout the day meant to boost your mood. Have a snack at a certain time, go for a walk at a certain time, whatever. That's what I do. When I'm feeling crappy I think "maybe I'll feel better after I have a break." Usually it works. I often feel too that after I try something new, it gets old to me real quick and I get bored. Does this mean I don't have depth, heart and passion for life? Will this menality translate to my relationships? How do I overcome this and make myself more consistent and interested in what I'm pursuing. I want to stick with "mind over matter" quote but it's easier said then done. Any advice? I think it's normal to jump around while you find out what you're passionate about. Even if something doesn't stick with you right away, you may come back to it later. If you have to force yourself to do a hobby, it's probably not for you. Keep trying new things until you find something that really interests you. Edited August 1, 2013 by SpiralOut Link to post Share on other sites
Author linds13 Posted August 2, 2013 Author Share Posted August 2, 2013 I'm dealing with the question today of why he couldn't forgive me in the relationship, but yet he forgive me in the healing process... It doesn't make sense to me. Link to post Share on other sites
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