Women get burned by players="No good men left"

[Phoe]

Men often treat their friends better than women do ? Cognitive Daily

 

If that's true, why do us guys get along with each other better than women do with one another?

 

I've known many women who couldn't stand other women and only had guy friends. But I don't know any guy who resorts to hanging out solely with women because he can't get along with other men.

 

Indeed, 90% of my friends are men. They're just very easy for me to get along with. I have just a handful of female friends and they're wonderful.

 

 

At my work my department is male dominated and every gets along WONDERFULLY. It's refreshing knowing I can go to work and have a lovely day with my coworkers.

 

 

Other departments, alternately, might be female dominated. There is always drama in those departments, always problems. Then there might be the one straggler female who wants nothing to do with her departments problems and just wants to leave

[BluEyeL]

I think good men are very rare. But its not because I have been burned by players. I don't date men who have a rep for being a player or dating around. I like to mess with them a bit and banter but not date them. I think good men are rare because I have found even the ones that seem nice and normal are jerks underneath you just have to wait for it to come out. All men are pigs pretty much, like over 90%, just varying degrees of piggy behavior.

 

I giggle when guys on this site tell "burned" girls to date virginlike, "nice guys" who are beta. I have dated many guys like that, they act eager in the beginning but over time they act the same as the jerks too long term once the novelty wears off. They just don't act that way all the time because they don't have as many options!

 

I think there are many good men, it's just that often women don't understand how to deal with them, and men don't understand how to deal with women. It has to be a good match and both willing to understand each other. Beta men are still men, you have to still treat them as such, it doesn't mean that they are jerks. What did they do that made them jerks?

[Shocksock]

Don't any of you men take into account that there have been SEVERAL women chime in on this thread and say they prefer nice men?

Or are we ALL the exception and not the rule?

... Considering the high number of women who complain about players

 

But seriously my reaction to these sort of threads is This

[Simon Phoenix]

Women are attracted to what they are attracted to. Nothing wrong with that. I just wish they wouldn't complain about the same things that rev their engine. You like a guy with charisma, spark, game, etc.? Awesome, but so does the majority of your gender. And those guys know they have game and they are going to use it.

 

When women complain about how the guys they are attracted to are "jerks" I just have very little sympathy. They knew the score coming in and a lot of them repeat the same process with the next guy and don't seem to learn anything. Now, not all charismatic guys who are good with women are jerks per se -- in fact, many aren't -- but the characteristics that tend to rev a woman's engine a lot of times overlaps with the characteristics that a "jerk" possesses. It's cool, I'm not here to appeal for the "nice guy", but chill on the whining about the guys that you can't seem to stay away from. Either tweak your selection process or just sack up and trudge along until you find that Prince Charming who you can separate from the 40 other women he's juggling.

 

That being said, if I were a woman I'd be annoyed as f--k at the "nice guy" who always bellyaches about how women overlook him. It's not the woman's problem, it's yours. I used to be that guy for a while when I was younger before I realized that you have to show strength to get success. It's not up to the woman to unwrap the present to find that extra special person dying to be noticed. The guy has to man up and give a woman a reason to peel the layers and find the inner you. Sure, it's a bit superficial, but so is a "nice guy" who wants that 5-foot-8 blonde cheerleader with a tight body and perky tits. You can't be superficial and then expect the woman to be unsuperficial. Gotta meet somewhere in the middle.

 

/rant

[MrRightNow]

It's not up to the woman to unwrap the present to find that extra special person dying to be noticed. The guy has to man up and give a woman a reason to peel the layers and find the inner you. Sure, it's a bit superficial, but so is a "nice guy" who wants that 5-foot-8 blonde cheerleader with a tight body and perky tits. You can't be superficial and then expect the woman to be unsuperficial. Gotta meet somewhere in the middle.

 

Well said bro

[man_in_the_box]

If a couple breaks up because of that, that's pretty sad. There's more to life and relationships than sex.

 

I figure by the time I get to 40 once a month sex will be more than enough (assuming sex happened that frequently, could be less frequent for all I know/care) for most women.

 

I've always wondered why there is no real market for sex-drive reducing medication. Seems like an awful lot of problems could be solved that way.

[Imported]

I've always wondered why there is no real market for sex-drive reducing medication. Seems like an awful lot of problems could be solved that way.

 

You can always have your testicles removed. That'll take care of your sex drive and ....all of your problems. Your problems, not mine. I'll keep my sex drive and deal with the problems.

[ltjg45]

Don't any of you men take into account that there have been SEVERAL women chime in on this thread and say they prefer nice men?

 

Or are we ALL the exception and not the rule?

 

Even you said there needs to be sexual attraction for a relationship to blossom. Just being a "nice guy" means nothing in the long run.

 

Nowadays, when someone calls me a "nice guy", I just tell them to call me an "idiot" instead. I really don't want anyone linking me up to the "nice guy" category ever again if I can help it.

 

Dude - I'm 34 and maybe it's just the circles I run in, but to be a "player" is seen as pretty pathetic. Most of my girlfriends are attractive and married to NICE MEN who treat them well. I'm dating a NICE GUY who is sweet to me. Have I dated jerks in the past? Sure, but come on - live and learn.

 

It really irks me that there is this prevalent attitude on LS that most women only like jerks and players, and that there's no middle ground because the rest are dateless losers. So dumb.

 

Who has his own career, his own home, good-looking, and can do basically anything if he wanted to since you found out later he's wealthy.

 

Funny. Him being a "nice guy" just wasn't enough to get your attention, I can rest assure you of that. If he was ugly or broke, you would have ran away for the hills.

[Ryan R.]

I've always wondered why there is no real market for sex-drive reducing medication. Seems like an awful lot of problems could be solved that way.

 

I would definitely be first in line to pick up a prescription for that if it ever became available. I don't see why there needs to be an expensive surgery or anything invasive in order to diminish something that some people have no use for.

 

Being a virgin, perpetually single, and having a sex drive just isn't fun in any sense of the word.

 

Back to the subject at hand: I truly do believe women want "nice guys" but they have to be sexually attractive, which I fail at doing.

[man_in_the_box]

You can always have your testicles removed. That'll take care of your sex drive and ....all of your problems. Your problems, not mine. I'll keep my sex drive and deal with the problems.

 

That's a bit radical don't you think? It'll severly hamper testosterone production and result in decreased muscle mass, body strength, more prone to depression and more negative side effects. On top of that its irreversible. Its similar to advising people to get on SSRI's just to decrease their sexdrive. Or getting them to start smoking.

 

I'm not sure what 'my' problems have to do with this, I just said as a general statement. Not as a personal desire

[hotpotato]

I see it all the time with with women around my good looking friend they know hes a player they try to "compete" for him he pumps and dumps them then they somehow are shocked and then complain that theyres no good men left

 

Maybe if women didnt go after the same few men with tons of options who have no intnetions of settling down they wouldnt get burnt.

 

Hard to feel sorry for women who knew and saw the signs but ignored it because they were driven by their hormones or ego or whatever.

 

Plenty of women avoid players and still get burned. What sayest thou???

[hppr]

Indeed, 90% of my friends are men. They're just very easy for me to get along with. I have just a handful of female friends and they're wonderful.

 

 

At my work my department is male dominated and every gets along WONDERFULLY. It's refreshing knowing I can go to work and have a lovely day with my coworkers.

 

 

Other departments, alternately, might be female dominated. There is always drama in those departments, always problems. Then there might be the one straggler female who wants nothing to do with her departments problems and just wants to leave

 

I have noticed this as well.

 

One of my first jobs one area was almost all female and my God were they a bunch of *****. Always drama, fights, rumors. They were all attractive late 20s/early 30s so at first I figured great! After about a week, not so much.

 

The other floors which were full of older married women and men were completely normal and they would joke about that level. Like having to 'go number 2' when you delivered something there, or say 'down to Hell' whenever they'd hit the button in the elevator.

[TheGuard13]

Women are attracted to what they are attracted to. Nothing wrong with that. I just wish they wouldn't complain about the same things that rev their engine. You like a guy with charisma, spark, game, etc.? Awesome, but so does the majority of your gender. And those guys know they have game and they are going to use it.

 

When women complain about how the guys they are attracted to are "jerks" I just have very little sympathy. They knew the score coming in and a lot of them repeat the same process with the next guy and don't seem to learn anything. Now, not all charismatic guys who are good with women are jerks per se -- in fact, many aren't -- but the characteristics that tend to rev a woman's engine a lot of times overlaps with the characteristics that a "jerk" possesses. It's cool, I'm not here to appeal for the "nice guy", but chill on the whining about the guys that you can't seem to stay away from. Either tweak your selection process or just sack up and trudge along until you find that Prince Charming who you can separate from the 40 other women he's juggling.

 

That being said, if I were a woman I'd be annoyed as f--k at the "nice guy" who always bellyaches about how women overlook him. It's not the woman's problem, it's yours. I used to be that guy for a while when I was younger before I realized that you have to show strength to get success. It's not up to the woman to unwrap the present to find that extra special person dying to be noticed. The guy has to man up and give a woman a reason to peel the layers and find the inner you. Sure, it's a bit superficial, but so is a "nice guy" who wants that 5-foot-8 blonde cheerleader with a tight body and perky tits. You can't be superficial and then expect the woman to be unsuperficial. Gotta meet somewhere in the middle.

 

/rant

 

Best post in days.

[hotpotato]

Stop playing with fire.

 

Agreed. The best way to do this os to stpp dating and stop being emotionally involved.