Attracted to a guy, but don't know if he's single

[Acacia98]

Hi guys,

 

I recently met a guy I feel strongly attracted to. Having just come out of a long-term LDR, I'm not in a rush to jump into a new relationship. But, if it is possible, I want to find out more about this guy. For instance, is he single, and is the interest mutual?

 

The problem is this: we don't have any mutual friends or friendly acquaintances, and the context in which we met is a professional one. So the only way to find out is by asking him. I interact with him once or twice a month when I'm picking up prescriptions for someone. He is friendly to me, but not inappropriately so. My instincts suggest to me that he is attracted to me, but that may just be wishful thinking, lol. Everything is perfectly professional. I'm not sure how to find out whether he's seeing someone and the interest is mutual without being too forward (we're pretty socially conservative here).

 

It occurs to me that the best thing to do might be to transition into friendship and then find out more about him through casual conversation. That would avoid any potential awkwardness. But how on earth would I go about doing that? I'm not exactly the queen of small talk . Does any one have ideas? Been through something similar and lived to tell the tale? Your thoughts would be much appreciated!

[MrRightNow]

You can try engaging him in a lighthearted conversation and then casually ask him if he's single, or you can be even more subtle and say something like, "I don't enjoy hanging out with my friends as much because they're all in relationships," and then see how he responds.

[Southern Cal Dude]

Um...ask? Just get to the point.

[pcplod]

Just boldly go up to him and say, "Excuse me sir, but I am conducting a survey for Gallup". Skip the bit about actually asking him whether he would be willing to voluntarily participate. Then say, "I firstly need to know your social profile. You are obviously male, but are you single, married, in a relationship, and do you have any children, and do you own your own home and what is your occupation; not in work, in education, tradesman or professional"?

 

If he is daft enough to fall for it, though, you might want to consider whether you want to go any further anyway.

 

And if you are crap at small talk you can always practice on him and even tell him you are practising on him. You never know, he might even appreciate it.

[Acacia98]

Um...ask? Just get to the point.

 

Problem with just asking was that, first of all, it was a professional relationship. If he wasn't comfortable with my asking, it could have had an effect on the dynamic of our interaction. I interact with this man on a semi-regular basis, I definitely wouldn't want it to be awkward.

 

Second thing is guys here can be kind of weird when ladies do the asking.

[Acacia98]

You can try engaging him in a lighthearted conversation and then casually ask him if he's single, or you can be even more subtle and say something like, "I don't enjoy hanging out with my friends as much because they're all in relationships," and then see how he responds.

 

This sounds like a plan!

 

Just boldly go up to him and say, "Excuse me sir, but I am conducting a survey for Gallup". Skip the bit about actually asking him whether he would be willing to voluntarily participate. Then say, "I firstly need to know your social profile. You are obviously male, but are you single, married, in a relationship, and do you have any children, and do you own your own home and what is your occupation; not in work, in education, tradesman or professional"?

 

If he is daft enough to fall for it, though, you might want to consider whether you want to go any further anyway.

 

And if you are crap at small talk you can always practice on him and even tell him you are practising on him. You never know, he might even appreciate it.

Lol. Thanks for the comic relief. I'll weigh my options then act. If I make any progress I'll let you all know.