Weird Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 damn charlane, *hugs* for the *****ed up junk you had to deal with from your mom. steve, you're the man bro:) Link to post Share on other sites
Charlane Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Originally posted by Weird damn charlane, *hugs* for the *****ed up junk you had to deal with from your mom. steve, you're the man bro:) Thanks Wierd. I'm sorry I dumped a little too much but my point is that we are all that this place in time as a large part of our experiences. I'm beating my box again but when my mom told me I belonged in a mental institution, I'm now making history as the only female NYMEX oil commodities trader in Texas. I was invited to a party by the president/chairman in Houston (with the Saudis) that will make international news. I decided not to go. It was just enough for me that I got the invitation. The other side of that coin is that I was so busy trying to make this happen and getting the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow that I lost the man that I love. I lost sight of him for trying to get the material things that would keep us from ever having to worry again, because for one reason he didn't really believe I could do it and he was an 8to5 man and thought I was wrong for leaving the conventional corporate world to do something I have waiting so long for. I saved up for this since I was 20 years old. I knew back then that I wanted this. I will know if I did the right thing within the next 12 months. So will he. Truthfully, it was good that he left me when he did really. I could not have focused on this if he were pressuring me at the same time. It would not have worked. Nice words Wierd (um, Rob). That was his name. Link to post Share on other sites
Urban Rubble01 Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Heh, that girl I was wondering about just called me. She apologized, she hurt her leg and actually had to go to the hospital. I feel like an idiot for wondering why a girl I barely know didn't call me for a few days, especially now that I know she was laid up like that. Anyway, she wants me to come see her. Actually, I've got a date with the ex tommorrow night (I'm going to sleep on her couch because I have an early appointment in the city) but I'm going to stop by and see the girl before then, bring her lunch or something. I'm feeling like a real ladies man ! =) I also had a great conversation with the ex yesterday. Like an idiot, I called her because I was feeling kind of down. Well, like always she made me wonder why I even worry. She told me the reason she doesn't call very much is because she doesn't want to give me mixed signals. I liked that because it shows that she is doing everything she can to make this easier on me. When I mentioned that I was trying to get out and meet some girls, just to see what that's like and not to start anyhting new, she jokingly told me "Well, you know you're not going to find anyone better than me" and when I told her the same she said she knows and that's why she isn't looking. She told me how her and her best friend (who is kind of a mutual friend of ours, we were together when they met as freshmen) were talking about how they miss hanging out with me because I'm the only guy that gets their humor. So things in that area are great with me. I can't put my life on hold, so I'm going to continue meeting girls and doing what I do. But I do feel confident that we're in a good spot. Steve, I feel you on that point about other pain in your life putting this all into perspective. I watch the news and see Fallujah being bombed into rubble, I see floods in Haiti where the people are already so poor, there is a genocide happening in the Sudan as I type this, and I sit here, in my nice American house and feel this sad about a girl ? A girl I love, but still, a girl. People go through so much trauma in this world, I can't help but feel guilty because my life is SO good, I have no right to feel sorry for myself. Hope everyone is doing well, today has been a good one for me. I finally feel like I'm stable enough to let this all play itself out. I still love my girl, but I will live without her. Link to post Share on other sites
bigacesteve Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Charlane, Your mum sounds like a fruitcake. Saying those things to you must have been so hurtful; my mother has always built me up and told me how great I am. It was my mum who took my brother and I to Karate when we were kids and just left us there. We didn't want to stay but she said "tough" and drove off. She would make us go twice a week and you ought to see us now 15 years later, 3 other Martial Arts later. We never got bullied. Sounds like your mother could have the green mist of jealousy to me. You sound very successful and you've looked after yourself; maybe she wanted these things but didn't go for it like you did??? "Well done Charlane". Your mum ought to say something like that for once. UR01, It's hard when you've been hurt by someone and then you let someone new into your life. The slightest thing like not ringing at a certain time can push all the panic buttons. Been there a few times myself and you kick yourself afterwards. Must be patient and stay cool. You seem to be in a good situation UR01, wish I was in your shoes. Weird, You're the man mate. I've seen how much you contribute on this website and that's why I've become more vocal just lately. drjones, It's a new day and I hope you are feeling better than before? I was missing my ex all Sunday and Monday but I do feel a lot better today and the craving has died down. It seemed that all of us were having a hard time at the same time (last few days) but we all came here and helped each other. atlous, Sounds like your ex took the pi55 a bit. Did he cheat on you? If so? you know the saying "once a cheater always a cheater". Like you said, you don't have time to waste on a tosser like him. Link to post Share on other sites
Jip Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Well said!! Yeah think it was a full moon over here on Sunday or something! Its funny how we can come so far yet keep getting dragged back some days!! Never easy is it! Great to see those having up days helping those on a downward slope though! Wish I could type on here all day... feels like my heads bulging with stuff but sadly work gets in the way and I don't have access at home. I'd like to say a big thank you to those who seem to be there for everyone - you don't know how much you help others.... I'm sure there are plenty out there who just read and perhaps can't input for one reason or another who are helped knowing there's others going through it to! UR01,Head/Heels, BigaceSteve, Weird - what a great atitude you guys have - keep it up! Anyway back to that report... yawn! Link to post Share on other sites
djones Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Hey Guys, Thanks for your help, I needed to hear that from all of you HandH thanks for that pep talk....I am up again its 5:00am I woke earlier than that, I now know she is not going to call me, i thought last night she would but I think this is her way of getting me to stop taking to her....I wish she would have just told me, but think it was too hard and painful for her to do so, so this is her way i guess...atleast I hope thats it....it does not matter anyway now I dont have her so, I am alone now, I am doing the NC thing, not much else i can do other than try to move on I will ask why so far no answer....but last night I prayed to God AGAIN to ask why iand to bring her back, and said another prayer for someone else that needed a prayer to be answered as well.....well I dont know if i got a message or not but when I woke up I the thought "if its meant to be it will be" was on my head, i dont know if those are comforting words right now for me...it kind of made me feel like crying but i didnt..... Bigsteve---yeah I think this timeof teh year is killing us all....I dont know what is going on but its an illness that needed to be cured.... take care guys Link to post Share on other sites
atlous Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Yeah Steve He cheated not once but twice and I have had a down weekend but in the end I have way more than he'll ever have! I feel better reading the love shack and would like to thank everyone for being themselves. Atlous Link to post Share on other sites
Weird Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Nice words Wierd (um, Rob). That was his name. Just realize his actions arent a symbol for all us other Robs out there. Weird, You're the man mate. I've seen how much you contribute on this website and that's why I've become more vocal just lately Thanks bro! I like it here. I like the people and like it when I can give any type of advice that helps others. I like reading your posts because you always give good advice and have great stories and good insights on things. I also like English sayings too:) Out of curiosity, what does bollocks mean? He cheated not once but twice and I have had a down weekend but in the end I have way more than he'll ever have! I feel better reading the love shack and would like to thank everyone for being themselves. Atlous What a dumb douchebag. To cheat on any woman is stupid & silly. To cheat on a great girl like you is well...no words can describe how much of a dumb ***** that guy is for doing that. I found out yesterday a buddy of mine broke up with his long time g/f a few weeks ago. He is down about it but they sorta had a break in the summer so I think he's betetr now since he realizes she is a lost cause. I am gonna try and get him to come here and post. He's a cool guy and think he'd conversing with you all. What is it with 2003 and 2004 with all the breakups? Insane...every non-marriage seems to have broken up these two years. Weird... Link to post Share on other sites
Jip Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Bollocks... literally means balls as in part of the male anatomy! But in these terms means B/S!! Weird is exactly the word! Either folk got engaged or split up inthe last few months (Aug/Sept in particular).... C'est La Vie! Link to post Share on other sites
Sukotto Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 I see some scottish slang slipped in Wanker, Tosser, Prat, Slag I've got a date on Thursday, i'm feeling quite good about it and I've not spoken to my ex now in a week and right now I dont care. When I think about her I dont feel any desire or loss which is a great thing, less sad times. I can still think of the good times and I do miss them but its not painful. I seriously suggest that (fe)male companionship is the best way to get yourself back on your feet, regardless of how your feeling about your ex. As soon as you meet someone else you'll realise that there are plenty of people out there who are willing to give you the respect that your ex seemed to lack. Sure this might be a rebound but as long as you've made your intentions clear with this person and they know that you might not be completely over your last relationship yet. If anything the challenge of a new relationship will help distract you from any past feelings and well if it gets back to your ex that your dating other people then it might be a kick in the arse for them and might put things into perspective and they'll realise their losing you. Link to post Share on other sites
Jip Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 A Glaswegian - I'm sitting in an office in 'old Reekie' the now! And here's another .... 'Erse'!! Although I do use W*nker a hell of a lot - what a great word that is! Good for you my man! Wish I was at your stage... I still get sad but not half as much as I used to! Like you I was getting used to not hearing from the 'erse' for a while and had been flirty and enjoying men's company (in a non slutty type of way)- don't know if he knew about any of it though. The first time you see them in months is hard - and don't do it while on a days sesh in perth as I did last Wed...l not a pretty sight!! But I agree mingling does help - not ready to start anything with anyone though. Had a dalliance with one chap but still felt a bit dead on the inside but hey onwards and upwards!! Won't stop me trying to have fun... easier when he's not around to be fair! Am starting to think that staying friends just won't work for me anytime soon - just too painful I think! Good luck on the date on Thurs, sounds like your looking forward to it! Link to post Share on other sites
bigacesteve Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Good luck Sukotto with the date. You are dead right about female companionship getting you back on your feet. Yea Weird, bollocks is another word for your knackers. It basically means whatever is happening is a big bunch of arse. Getting quite a few people from the UK on lately, cool. Link to post Share on other sites
crazydawg Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Weird, Britney Spears is what happened.. and Jlo they make it seem its okay to bang whoever marry and divorice and repeat again. Our society itself is going to garabge with these role models. Same **** with guys. Everyone needs to be a pimp, and hit this shorty up and that shorty. LOL. What happens when everyone is old and ugly. You not gonna be pimping **** Link to post Share on other sites
LexiB Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Originally posted by crazydawg Weird, Britney Spears is what happened.. and Jlo they make it seem its okay to bang whoever marry and divorice and repeat again. Our society itself is going to garabge with these role models. Same **** with guys. Everyone needs to be a pimp, and hit this shorty up and that shorty. LOL. What happens when everyone is old and ugly. You not gonna be pimping **** Ha, well said Link to post Share on other sites
Weird Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Weird, Britney Spears is what happened.. and Jlo they make it seem its okay to bang whoever marry and divorice and repeat again. hehe sounds like a shampoo commercial. "Hump, leave, repeat" Yeah man no question images in the media has screwed things up big time but I won't put all the blame on it. I see the media crap and don't act like that. I guess it is a combo of media influence and just a lack of intelligence. I need to go back to the old school days where morals actually existed and people actually cared about this type of stuff. On a somewhat unrelated note, I hate when I see mothers smoking around their babies. Saw one today and that crap sickens me. Link to post Share on other sites
Urban Rubble01 Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 On a somewhat unrelated note, I hate when I see mothers smoking around their babies. Saw one today and that crap sickens me. That pisses me off too. My friend just had a kid (with a girl who lied and said she was on the pill, they're 19 and 22) and his "baby's momma" (not his girlfriend or wife) smokes around the kid constantly. When we're not there to bitch her out for it of course. The weird thing is, when me and him smoke a joint she not only take the kid out of the room, she takes it out of the house ! She'll hold the baby and breath toxic cigarrette smoke in her face, but she acts as if a joint being smoked 2 rooms away is going to melt her skin ! Not that I'd want the baby to be present for either, but still, tobacco just seems worse to me. I'm loving the Enlgish/Scottish slang, keep it up. Americans are so boring. Link to post Share on other sites
Charlane Posted December 1, 2004 Share Posted December 1, 2004 Originally posted by crazydawg Weird, Britney Spears is what happened.. and Jlo they make it seem its okay to bang whoever marry and divorice and repeat again. Our society itself is going to garabge with these role models. Same **** with guys. Everyone needs to be a pimp, and hit this shorty up and that shorty. LOL. What happens when everyone is old and ugly. You not gonna be pimping **** Haha!~ All needing their own private fan club. I lost count of the number of people that thought they were stars in their own right. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mj108 Posted December 1, 2004 Author Share Posted December 1, 2004 I think it's soooo cool we have different people from everywhere here. Jip, Sukotto, & BigAceSteve---I enjoy ya'lls post. I mean, I know if I talked to you all in person I would love the accent! Keep posting---you all have been a big help to me. UR01---I'm with ya---Love the talk going around on this post. I have an accent myself. You're looking at a southern belle. lol I have the most country accent! ha BigAceSteve---I agree with Weird. Send the note! I think she is very interested in you. Go for it! PS---If we ever ended up in a bar together chugging some beer---& some people came up starting crap---our kickboxing selves would kick their a**! Jip---Never been to Scotland but I've always wanted to go. My sister & I always wanted to come over & visit...just haven't yet. You get everything off your chest girl! Last week I told my ex what was bothering me. It has helped me! I haven't even called him because I know he knows what is bothering me now. Now he can sit there & think about it. Stay strong Jip! Also---Looked on my calendar & a full moon suppose to arrive on Christmas ! Also Jip, I feel the same way...can I be friends with my ex? Then I think about kickboxing him in the "bullocks" & moving on. Sukotto---Good luck on the date! My guy-buddy that I've been friends with forever has been distracting me. I mean, he's hurting just like me & we just chit chat but it helps, you know? I think we all need to distract ourselves in some way because I think all of our exes do not deserve good people like us, you know? Weird---I'm going to get a recent picture & go to match.com. My cousin is getting some pictures developed this week (recent). It does make me mad about people smoking around babies. I'm fixing to get custody of my niece because my brother is shot out & her mother is a crack head. Anyway, I've been a part-time parent for 3 years. My parents have custody but I'm going to be going for custody soon. Wish me luck. I will say---I don't allow smoking around her & she just turned 5. I never allowed it around her before (& I have friends that smoke) & If I had a problem with it....you know my blunt self ...yeah...you guessed....I told them. Link to post Share on other sites
Charlane Posted December 1, 2004 Share Posted December 1, 2004 Thinking of him. This is not my night. I'm trying to get thru to tomorrow. I thought this pain would leave after 6 months. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mj108 Posted December 1, 2004 Author Share Posted December 1, 2004 Charlane---I haven't been on match.com yet. I'm getting some recent pics. developed. But I will say I have been through the abuse---not with my mom (sorry you had to deal with that) but with an ex ex (not the ex I'm in love with). I will say it made me stronger. My ex said I wouldn't amount to anything & told me I was 'stupid'....Update: I'm taking over a company in March 2005....as owner....at 34. Worked hard for it. My ex told me I was fat (which I wasn't at the time but I will thank him now for telling me that I was fat because NOW I CAN KICK HIS A**). Anyway, Now I have a bod that I've always dreamed of because I worked hard for it (For myself...not for him ) I mean, I can say me being 34 girl...I have a bod that Spears would die for. lol Not skinny...FIT! lol My redneck self will say---I'm so fit...you can bounce a quarter off my a**! lol I should be on the Fitness magazine. That's one thing I can say good about myself. Anyway, my ex told me that no other guy would want me. Funny how him and I broke up & all his friends wanted to take me out. I told them "Heck no!" Cuz---wouldn't never do that eventhough my ex ex was a prick to me...but I did get my laugh! Same with you girl...your mom called you all those things...but you---yourself---in your heart & soul---know that she just was running her mouth because of her own insecurties. You know you got it going on...***** the abusers! Atlous---I feel like you. If My ex was to call this second...I wouldn't pick up! I guess you get to the point where you're tired of the BS, you know? Enough is Enough! We don't need cheaters in our lifes---we deserve a good guy that's going to treat us like QUEENS! Let them treat the Whale & Psycho like Sheet! You look forward---not back. We both deserve so much better. Just like I've told ya---WE ARE NOT GOING TO HAVE A PROBLEM. "Live for now!" That's going to be my motto for 2005---I like that! "2005---WE WILL SURVIVE--LIVE FOR NOW!" Hell yeah! Crazydawg---Hey! Yeah---I talked to the ex last week. I think I gained your strength & got tired of the nonsense this & that & haven't even picked up the phone to call him. Does he deserve a good girls phone call? Hell no! Link to post Share on other sites
Author mj108 Posted December 1, 2004 Author Share Posted December 1, 2004 I know what you mean. How can someone be so cold yet seem so sweet on ya? I can't understand why our exes are this way. Why can't people be honest anymore? I mean---tell me the truth, you know? It's like people out there are wishy/washy & they are scared to step on 'toes.' If I have food on my chin---I want to know---don't go around ignoring the food on my chin! I want to know. Step on my toes & tell me if I have mac-n-cheese on my face! It's funny how you sit across people that you think are honest/blunt/& will not make you look like a jackass with food on your chin & they won't say a thing. The next thing you know you are in the bathroom & saying "WTF...Oh my God? How many people seen that on my face?" My ex couldn't be honest & step on my toes. He wanted to be wishy/washy & couldn't tell me he was going back to psycho (probably wouldn't tell me if I had something on my face either;)) No---He wouldn't cause here I am looking like a JackA**! Instead of sheet on my face---it's around my heart because he wasn't HONEST with me! He couldn't tell me he was going back to his ex a MONTH before. Why couldn't he just tell me a month before our break up that he didn't want to see me anymore? He didn't want to do that...he wanted ALL THE CAKE! He couldn't face me---He knows who I am! I mean, he knows how blunt/honest/stubborn/a little insecure at times/loyal/impatient/ but yet he wanted to do everything that I told him would ruin it for us & everything else ...friendships...family....lovers....he was dishonest--not loyal---I will not go back to that & that's why I'm not reaching for the phone right now. Can you believe the last conversation I had with him he said "I didn't use you." My response? I was speechless! Then he said "You hear me?" Me: "Yeah." What else is there to say? Sod him! If he didn't use me he would be with me right now! Chester the Molester & Psycho the Wacko! What a team! They don't deserve our love & they will regret it one day. You are right---seems like they try to contact through friends (like my ex did last week). When you are doing great & living life is when they mess with ya! PS. You do seem more mature for your age. It's different for me. People think I'm younger cuz I'm silly & rambunctious. lol I guess we are venting the same rage. ha Had to get it out. Thanks for listening. Link to post Share on other sites
crazydawg Posted December 1, 2004 Share Posted December 1, 2004 Mj Everytime you think of contacting him just remember who he's doing now ewwww...... i can't wait for my ex to ever contact me again, i want her too, just to give her the same lame speech she gave me. It's better if we don't talk and go our sperate ways.. I know one day i'm going to have that satisfaction.. I won't be a dick but i'ma make sure i strike back to all this pain i went through. On an update i'm currently talking to 2 girls one from my past (not an ex) and another from school. It seems like i'm racking up the girls numbers all of a sudden again. Haven't decided which one to hang out on the weekend with yet =) I also had an amazing night at a club thanksgiving eve. Some of my ex's friends were there to see me get down and dirty =) thats always a plus... my ex ex the one i dumped.. well i haven't seen her since her birthday which is about the last time i spoke to my current ex. Funny even my ex ex gave me advise to try and be nice. I asked her how did she get trhough all the pain i put her through and she could still be nice to me. She said that she knew one day i'd realize what i did. When she said that i hugged herrr so tight and told her i'm very stupid for ever leaving her.. She's still with her bf that i disaprove of but i love her like my sister i know for sure i'm never going to leave someone for someone else.. it took me to get hurt to realize this. I'm happy to say we all got through this together... Link to post Share on other sites
head/heels Posted December 1, 2004 Share Posted December 1, 2004 here is a quick one as i have to get to bed and i have realized my mood is always down if i lack the sleep me needs... well to correct real quick....i am never going to give love to chester the molester as her is the one with my ex-angel...that was my nickname for her from early on....she helped me through a rough time in my life and somehow looking back i realized that i was calling her angel and it had dual meaning.... now she is a succubus..... anyhow i hope chester gets picked up by the po-po and sent to jail for kiddie porn or whatever...but seriously i am hurting from the deceit and lack of loyalty and faith in "us" that she felt and showed...i absolutely cannot understand how she could (and can) look herself in the mirror...which is one reason i am sure she is not good and her conscious and her lowself esteem will always haunt her.... but i have to come to grips with the fact that i am not her keeper and i am not her momma.... she will sink or swim but it will be w/o me! i have to go inside myself to come out and find healing and better health and happiness... it is funny....when i was with her i was confident happy etc....now i am unconfident often and not happy often and she is the one who lied and hid things (feelings) from me! She never "cheated" physically but she did break up with me to go out with this guy,....but in her mind we were over for a while (5-8 months) during which i bent over backwards to be there for her at all times, worked and saved up 10K for her by selling ebay in spare time and used the money to plan a proposal vacation and buy the ring......so i guess i got snookered and kicked in the knackers.... so why do i hurt when she is ( and it is hard to see her as this since i never knew her this way until the bad day) the one who is a bad person and a weak person and going to need therapy b4 she can ever be happy with herself? why am i discombobulated? sod her is all i can tell myself... and i did just buy a kick butt bible that helps explain things clearly....i hope i can get into it for once! i need some inspiration of better things to come, but i always go back to how beautiful and how soft her skin was when i held her and i am back at square one.....man she was a looker.....but she never has thought so....go fu(king figure. MJ- keep your head up and shine on and dont look back! we know we are better than them and were the "catch" of the relationship! well minus UR01 whos ex seems stable and i pray they get back..... anyword from Nick? does he PM anyone...if so tell him i am thinking of him and pray for him each night....if you are reading this NICK, let god carry you and put it all on his back, he will lift you up....and we are here for you anytime you need to talk....hope the ex hasnt contacted you and especially her friends... good night all tomorrow the sun will rise and it will be better than today! derek Link to post Share on other sites
Author mj108 Posted December 1, 2004 Author Share Posted December 1, 2004 You corrected me & I'm glad. I just was ranting like hell...what I meant to say is chester the molester & psycho the wacko deserves The exes. Then I meant to say...our exes doesn't deserve our love. That our exes are like a team...a team to hurt us. lol Sorry...I will say....I had some beer tonight. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mj108 Posted December 1, 2004 Author Share Posted December 1, 2004 Also---I've been wondering where Nick has been too. Has anyone heard from him? I haven't. Link to post Share on other sites
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