How Long For Nc Until The Ex Knows They Have Messed Up!

[Charlane]

Originally posted by Weird

charlane,

 

babe, don't worry about being seen with your new dude around your ex. Screw him if he has a problem with it and don't feel guilty if you do bump into him out and about. Just be yourself if it happens.

 

Thank you Wierd. He did want me to move on. I'm sure his jaw would drop seeing the new guy. He went for a younger woman only I'm sure that this new guy is even younger than her, ironically, and this was totally not my intention. This new guy is really good looking too. Who would have thought? I certainly didn't. If I did bump into him, I will smile because that's what I always do. In fact, he used to drill me about how it was that I never got mad about anything. He couldn't understand that I just didn't want to be. If anything this has made me a little tougher I think, but I would still rather smile.

[head/heels]

Well first off..............

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MJ!!!!!!!!!

 

 

you are just as young and beautiful as the day we met....online giriping about our exs! i would think i was (our we are) wasting time on here if it wasnt for the little family we have going on....tommorrow is ATLOUS 's b-day i believe! 1 2 3 in a row!

 

 

well this is my new first day of NC and i will tell you it is 10000X s easier than day one of the first NC......I am not even that upset about breaking it since i let her know that i did not hate her (which was one of the first things she asked me---since i never called her back[even though i told her that is exactly what i was going to do(not call her)] and that she is welcome to call me if she is hurting and cant go to anyone else..)

 

upon further review though, i think i am going to tell her that i cannot talk to her since it is not fair or respectful to her relationship and that i wasnt sure if they were still an item and i was worried about her self-esteem induced depression....

 

She is a grown up and she can call me and tell me if she wants me, now i know that she doesnt go a day w/o thinking of me and i know it feels weird thinking of me whenever she is with him...(like kid rock/ sheryl crow's song PICTURE)...so i know she is (for some reason or another) attracted to this guy or his lifestyle, and that she is not over me and knows she needs help.

 

 

So i am worried how shady it will look since i called to check on her and she said she was doing bad......and then i say if you need to talk (since she said she cant tell him bc it is too soon in the dating process for her to let him know this) [sHE TOLD ME IN THE 2ND MONTH WHEN WE GOT A LITTLE TIPSY- i.e. she was comfortable with me from the start)...to call me but i wont be calling you because this is not right.....

 

i told her that i knew that times get hard and thats why i am checkin on ya.

 

so i left it at that and i do think she will be calling me, but she still says she will never get over me and always love me, but that doesnt mean we have to be together.... I do believe i remember her saying "yet" at the end of that sentence but it might have been me hoping for that...i cant remember...

 

all i know is that i told her i was great and i got a new car, painted my house, new job, went to haiti, kissed a haitian woman, and am greatful for the breakup!..

 

i am in a way, i am not in a 1 sided, mystery relationship where i was kept in the dark as to her mixed feelings...

 

She told me last night she is good at acting....and that she smiles all the time, but she is not happy inside....like a clown...

 

She is so fugged up and i am partly relieved that i am away from her....but the other part of me wants to help her fix it....but i cant....and that is what i am going to say to her...my best friends ex, who was PUT into the hospital has to decide she wants to straighten up after they let her loose or she will be back to the alcohol and weed.....my ex has to learn on her own and i am not going to sit around and hope she figures it out.......i will let the chips fall where they may..

 

Charlene- just dont worry about your ex, you may miss something 100X better

 

Weird- dont kiss her! but do try to be patient and show her the MAN she is missing...and try not to degrade or immaterialize her...just show her she is important and her feelings (although immature in all senses of the word) are important to you too....

 

MJ- i dont know if your sit...i called because i was worried, and i thought i had a pretty good chance of her talking to me...but i also had alcohol in me and that wasnt good either...but it turned out well and will give her much to think about....She said she had a ****ty b-day... I hope you dont..go have a few on the family here at LS...enjoy! but drink responsibly......this message brought to you by the makers of budweiser beer...

 

NICK!!!- you are alive!...how is the coping going on your end...i hope you are chipper as you can be and that you are healing from the past two traumas in your life...keep us posted, it feels like you are the son who has gone away to college to us here...

 

DRJ- how is it with the new girl?

 

Wantan- What is an S4...a car? i am going to be getting the Lincoln LS that i have had my eye on for awhile...possibly tonight...

 

KOdiak- do post again!

 

finally, i hope that my ex is not going to use me to boost her ego and what not...how should i make sure of this aside from telling her i cant talk to her while she is dating Chester the child molester?

 

I really hate that when people do what she is doing..i.e. talk to their exs or someone else when they are in a relationship....no matter how serious.. (well not no matter, but i think they would be consided together- but how should i know for sure)... so any advice on what now (i.e. when she calls again)?

 

I know i will let her carry the convo when she does call... (she wont be able to though...she is totally zzzzzzz on the phone...and especially when she is depressed and trying to hide her true feelings from me...

 

She is a piece of work...

 

SE LA VIE all out there!

[mj108]

Hi everyone!

 

Head/Heels--I agree with Drjones...you need to sit tight. Leave it in Gods hands. Only God knows our future/destiny. Wish we knew, you know?

 

Drjones---Thanks again. I'm fixing to put on my hip-hugger jeans & a cool shirt with my black boots & party on. lol I do have some good news to share in a minute.

 

Weird---Have fun tonight with your ex! Hope it goes well for both of us on my birthday night.

 

theone44---Yeah, I know what you mean. The guys I have met love drama. It's like they can't be happy unless their lives are filled with BS. I'm like grow the ***** up, you know? Me and my ex had the 'connection' going on too. I still haven't found it with anyone else.

 

Charlane---How old are you & how old is the new guy? Reason why...I generally attract younger guys because I look 25. ha

 

My ex hasn't called & I haven't called him. It's kind of shocking since I thought he would call me on my b-day. Maybe he will later.... HOWEVER, another ex called me. I haven't spoke to him in a long, long time. He wanted to wish me a happy b-day (kinda made me happy he remembered) & asked what I was doing tonight. I told him. He said he is going to try & stop by. He has to work late but said he's going to try to make it. I had 4 guys calling me wanting to hang out for my b-day. lol Then my ex ex calls & I tell him to stop by. When him and I were together we got along perfect...he's 7 years younger than me. ha I just tend to have more in common with younger men. Plus me looking younger. ha God has blessed me with youth. I will not lead him on in anyway...I'm not like that. I am kind of nervous about seeing him. Wow! Strange day. Haven't heard from him in awhile & he calls & says Happy b-day. Oh well. I guess me and Weird are going to be hanging out with exes tonight.

 

Everyone take care! I'll try to post tomorrow. Hope everyone has a great night! I say everyone--go out & have a b-day drink for me & cheers away. ha

[Weird]

Heels,

 

I like the cut of your jig bro. haha yeah I won't kiss her tonight but it would be funny.

 

I also agree about the little family atmosphere here. I frequent this thread the most not because I am hurt or need to feel better but because I like the people here. Hell, I come to this site in general because I try to offer advice to people who may be where I was before and I hope that my experience can help them avoid a lot of stress.

 

MJ,

 

cool, hope you have a great night tonight.

 

you need to whip up a pic of yourself so we can see how young you look.

 

As for me, I haven't felt well all day and stayed home from work. I am gonna warn my ex on the way to the restaurant that I don't feel all that hot so not to expect a ton of conversation from me. I would cancel the dinner but she is the type of person who will think I am trying to get out of it rather than see that I actually don't feel well. She would say "that's find, doesn't matter to me" but in reality it would bug her. Why she plays the games, I don't know.

[theone44]

Originally posted by Weird

Heels,

 

I like the cut of your jig bro. haha yeah I won't kiss her tonight but it would be funny.

 

I also agree about the little family atmosphere here. I frequent this thread the most not because I am hurt or need to feel better but because I like the people here. Hell, I come to this site in general because I try to offer advice to people who may be where I was before and I hope that my experience can help them avoid a lot of stress.

 

MJ,

 

cool, hope you have a great night tonight.

 

you need to whip up a pic of yourself so we can see how young you look.

 

As for me, I haven't felt well all day and stayed home from work. I am gonna warn my ex on the way to the restaurant that I don't feel all that hot so not to expect a ton of conversation from me. I would cancel the dinner but she is the type of person who will think I am trying to get out of it rather than see that I actually don't feel well. She would say "that's find, doesn't matter to me" but in reality it would bug her. Why she plays the games, I don't know.

 

 

 

Same here too weird and it have been 5 month to me since i talk or seem my ex. I'm feeling better and a lot stronger now. I no longer feel the pain now since we first broke up,but i found that the "no contact rule" was my best friend. Also by praying to God and asking him to help me have really help me a lot,plus everyone on this forum.......esp weird. Thank all for ya'll support.

[Weird]

you're welcome bro:)

 

 

Ex just called me. Said she just got out of work (an hour past her reg hours) and is on her way to pick me up.

 

This little dinner thing is already turning out bad. Gonna be packed at the restuarant I bet by the time we get there.

 

I'll try my best to be pleasant to her all night but I dunno if it is going to happen.

 

I am sure she'll spend an hour telling me all about her day at work today.

 

I am in such a "blah" mood that I am sure I'll pounce if she says anything that bugs me.

[kodiak]

Hey Everybody-

 

Well i have been out the loop for awhile now so i dont even think that I can give any advice to anyone although I wish I could. Its awesome that this new thread is already at 255 post, most by people from "if its meant to be they will come back" Well so how is everything doing? Are we feeling better about things, moving on, meeting new people,etc? Has anyone made some progress with there exes, gotten back together, or is on the steps to getting back? I sure hope so. Please let me know, i could use some good info these days.

 

As for me, well here is my story. I have been feeling kinda sad lately. I have been missing my ex so much now. I was hoping that i was getting over her but it all came back like a ton of bricks. Maybe its because the holidays are coming up or because I havnt talked to her in awhile. She used to call me about every three weeks and now it stopped. I figured that she just met someone else and forgot about me. It happens. It hurts so bad to think that your ex could forget about you but i see it happen alll the time. Its even harder when a relationship ends like mine did. You all know, long distance and bad timing but still alot of love. It sucks!!!!!I wish that she would just call to say hello. Just so I know that she still thinks of me once in a blue moon. Her b-day is coming up and i want to send her a card. Out of all my past exes, she is the only one that i would send a b-day card to. Im sure I will get no reply or a thank you but i want her to know that I do still think of her. what do you guys think? Good idea/ Bad idea??? Its been five months and i know shes not coming back, so what do i have to loose buy sending her a b-day card, you know? I was talking to a girl for a couple weeeks and I was really happy. To be honest i still thought about my ex but not as much. She was really into me and then she just stopped calling. I came to find out that she just got out of a very crappy relationship and is all mixed up. Oh well it was menat to work out. I wanna call my ex and just say hello but i keep myself from doing it. The holidays are coming upo and its going to be tough. we had great holidays togther and now I just think of her spending these times with someone new. Thats basically it for me. Nothing exciting but im going to try to get back to the shack here and start posting again. I hope that everyone is doing better than me. I will be fine, its just been a rough week and sad times...Take Care everyone.........................Kodiak

[Charlane]

Originally posted by mj108

Hi everyone!

 

<snip>

 

Charlane---How old are you & how old is the new guy? Reason why...I generally attract younger guys because I look 25. ha

 

 

 

Hi MJ,

 

I'm 43 and he's 32 and really I shouldn't put a lot of faith into whether this guy and I will work out but it does feel good right now. My mom is 8 years older than my dad so this is all normal for me. I didn't speak English (Italian) until I was 4 and my mom always thought that my dad was older and he let her think so too. Amazing how long that went on for.

 

Wierd, stay positive whatever you do. Anything else would so totally blow it.

 

Hey head/heels, I hope so. With whatever it is, I would rather feel good about myself and with all of the changes I am making with myself at least I am getting attention as a result. It's just a matter of time before life is beautiful and full of love again.

 

Kodiak, the holidays are getting to me too. If I didn't have the new guy in my life, I would be really thrashed. There has to be something that will take this edge off. I run every day. I have too. I can't tell you what kind of good that it does for me. This might be something that you might like to try.

 

The weekend is here and the new guy is in Denver (I'm in San Antonio) because he is a coach and it's all about the game. I won't see him until next week. It kind of stinks because I revert to wondering what my ex is doing and who he is doing it to. I know my time is coming. I really do believe that there is some reasoning involving God and I'm sure that I will understand it later so I have to tell myself that now.

[Weird]

well that went as I figured it would.

 

It seems like my ex and I are not going to continue talking and going for a friendship that isn't working out. Oh well.

 

During dinner all she did was talk about her work and I just came to the realization this girl is so focused on her job and that is basically her life and while I am happy for her and all that jazz, I just don't have much to talk to her about regading it and she seems to think I should and it is frustrating on both our parts and especially with me and it makes me not want to be around her. Also, she seems to get frustrated when I don't have much to say about what is going on with me because well, nothing exciting is going on! It is the same old crap, diff pile and I guess she feels I should have mroe to say when I don't.

 

I sorta blew up on her getting into the car after dinner and just told her she seems to try and forget we have a past and said I don't know what she expects me to say to her when she doesn't even remember stuff I told her a few weeks ago because at dinner she asked me a question to something I told her about (something that is important to me) multiple times in October and she forgot. I said I didn't see the point to trying to talk if she is just going to forget what I say. She said she doesn't just forget stuff that I say but stuff other people say since she is so busy and ****. Problem is I was telling her stuff during dinner and she didn't see to give a fug what I was saying and I think THAT is the reason why she forgets stuff rather than her just being "busy." Basically, she doesn't LISTEN. She asked me for anymore stories regarding this co-worker I have who is a tool and I told her a pretty big one that could have had a good discussion with and all my ex said was "oh yeah?" and that was it. She did not have any interest and i bet if I asked her in 3 weeks what I told ehr she'd say she didn't remember.

 

Talked a little more in the car and got back to my place and talked for a few mins and she said it just wasn't working out (the friendship) and didn't see a point to us trying to do this. I said it can work out if there is EFFORT and no assumptions and expectations of each other. I told her she needs to see how she acts from my end and she also needs to not get bitchy and think something is wrong when I give my answers to her telling me about work. I told her she thinks that I am just some guy who is upset she doesn't spend more time with me or that she singles me out but I told her that isn't the case. I just said I want us to be more open and when we do talk online then to talk about stuff then rather than wait for our monthly visit. She said she doesn't have time to do that which is BS. I know it is BS. I told her we just need to resolve stuff and she said "what needs resolving?" because she said we did resove stuff. I said nothing has EVER been resolved and just cuz we spent a year not talking doesn't mean stuff got resolved. She shrugged her shoudlers to this and did her typical fashion of wanting to stop talking and just quit on things. I told her I do want to work on the friendship but it will take effort from both of us and no expectations and we need to clean the slate and I said this talk tonight was us cleaning the slate. Naturally she disagreed and said there is no point and took her stubborn flight path yet again.

 

Told her to do whatever she wants to do and hugged her and said bye.

 

Oh and she went on about me disrespecting her by yelling at her when we got to the car after dinner and I said yes it was disrespectful and was sorry. She then went on how she thinks she doesnt deserve that and to me seemed to imply she has never disrespected me. I was like "you want to talk about disrespect?" and that sorta quieted her because she knew I had an arsenal of ways she disrespected me.

 

I also said she is married to her job and she said no she isn't. It was funny to hear her say she isn't when it is pretty much her WHOLE LIFE. When I asked her what does she do with her friends she says they go out to dinner and coffees and jsut talk. I ask what they talk about and she said usualy work. How then is her work not her life? My goodness.

 

I told her we can hang out and make this work but we need to actually do stuff. I mean at dinner she talked about a person at work who plays tennis and how she could be her new tennis partner. I asked her later why doesn't she ever want to do anything with me? Why not say "Rob, we should play tennis one day" Her reply was that I don't know how to play tennis. I was like "well you could help teach me" It is just **** like that which bugs me and makes me realize there is no point with this girl despite my trying to make it work. It is like she refuses to advance our friendship past telling me about work on a monthly basis. She never seems to want to do ANYTHING that you know, FRIENDS DO.

 

I told I just want us to be able to hang out and be close and she said it wasn't working and since she is a runnaway person, I guess she feels to just give up rather than see the issues and work on them. She can't EVER see stuff from another person's point of view. I admit I am not the best at that but I am leagues better than she is. I also todl her I wish the roles were reversed because she would be flipping out on me over all this and bitching at me. Like *****, she has bitched at me a few times when she thought I was ignoring her online so think how she would react if she actually was getting ignored by my apparent busy ass.

 

The best was she said maybe it was a mistake for her to come apologize in Sept and be the optomist and think we could be close friends again. I said that since she did that she hasn't made the effort to be close and stuff. Peeps, it is like as soon as she apologized she thought things would magically be perfect and she could resort to being how she was early last year which was distant and never talking about anything. So friggin stupid. I told her you have to change for things to change and she basically said she cant do that or something.

 

Oh well. Hilarious. I tried but she is a shell of her former self. She went from being a cool girl that to me was perfect to a pretty cool girl with some issues to a now 23 year old who has no personality or any substance other than work and talking to her feels like talking to a retired person.

 

At least I am not surprised at her mentality of picking up her ball and running home. All I know is she is in a world of hurt when she gets older and actually starts to value human relationships if she doesn't change her ways.

 

What sucks is that I sorta feel like a bad guy and that I am not giving her my understanding when I know I have not been a bad guy and simply just want to be closer to that girl and not feel like someone she just met yesterday. Gah.

 

Screw her. Silly me for thinking that in Sept that things between us would have been cool and she actually was willing to be a true friend. At least I don't really care all that much about us apparently ending communication again. That's what not talking to someone for over a year will do for you. Oh and at least I got any remaining bit of stress (it was tiny) that this whole situation was still giving me.

 

If any guy gets with her the way she is now he is in a world of hurt since she can't deal with anything at all.

[atlous]

So I work at a restaraunt part time. You know being a student sucks ass and I have to work. So everyone knows that it is my birthday tommorow and I am not working tommorow. I only work once a week. Well they creamed me with choclate whipping cream! Even the customers did! I had no idea how much they love me . I had to drive home looking like I just came from a foam bar. Jesus man I swear I need to quit. LOL I made 80.00 tonight in tips in three hours I was like ching ching! I am a people person and I love to waitress I have so much fun working there because we know that this is not our career it is a place to get away from school and we are moslty students. The girls are crazy and some of them are in nursing to. We are supposedly slutting it up tommorow they want me to show my cleavage tommorow night. This should get interesting. I am a jeans and bunny hug girl in lecture theatres and now they want me to ho it up. I am ready! Wow I have had no time to go out in the last three months. I wondre if my ex will wish me a happy birthday. Actually I wish he wouldn't because I probably would not answer the phone

 

MJ! can you hear me BEHAVE yourself! Just kiddin ho it up momma! Happy Birthday!

 

Weird our exs may be of the opposite sex but they have the same mentality!

 

I have to go and shower all the whip cream and take my black skirt to the dry cleaners. I am in for a hell of a weekend wish you all could party it up with me

[head/heels]

go and smile it up...!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

HAVE ONE GREAT WEEKEND AND DONT STOP HAVING THE TIME OF YOUR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

NEVER FORGET WHAT IS IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

 

just have as much fun as possible!!!!!!!!!

 

and dont ever look back as it would be a diservice to all things right in this world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

okay enough of the pep talk and glory be to god for putting us in the right place for our happiness!

 

 

happy b-day beautiful girl!

[head/heels]

"My Place"

(feat. Jaheim)

 

I used to pride myself on being the other man

But now it's flipped and I don't want u with no other man

Why can't u understand anything I'm offering

I gave you the world but you just wanted arguing

From the time I picked you up, until the time I dropped u off again

Even flipped out on me at the mall again

"it's all his fault again" that's what u telling all ya friends

I aint pointing fingers ma, I just wanna call again

See how ya day going I know they stressin on ya

I know them times get hard that's why I'm checkin on ya

It's yours truly ma, I got a little message for ya

Anything he can do, girl I can do it better for ya, cause

 

[bridge]

When we laugh or we cry it's together

Through the rain and the stormiest weather

We gon still be as one it's forever, it's forever

 

[Chorus]

Won't you come on and go with me

Come on ova to my place

Won't you sit ya self down and take a seat

And let me ease ya mind girl

We gon do it our way

 

I heard your friend told a friend that told a friend of mine

That you was thinking that we should do it one more time

If this aint the truth then hopefully it's not a lie

Cause I aint got no issue's with hitting at another time

We never had a problem gettin it done

Disagreed upon a lot ma but the sex wasn't one

Now check it I know u get excited (still) when I come round and bite it (girl)

Quit frowin up and quit actin like you don't like

 

I like it, I like it, I really, really like it, I want it, adore it, so come let me enjoy it

 

[bridge]

When we laugh or we cry it's together

Through the rain and the stormiest weather

We gon still be as one it's forever, it's forever

 

[Chorus]

Won't you come on and go with me

Come on ova to my place

Won't you sit ya self down and take a seat

And let me ease ya mind girl

We gon do it our way

 

Shawty where u been

Feels like a long time, long, long time since I seen ya

Yes it has girl, when I know I said some ****ed up things to u before

But girl u know I didn't mean it

(I didn't mean one single word)

(I never meant one single word)

If I could take back every word I would and more fo sho

If I thought that you believe it

Cause you make my life so convenient for me

 

[bridge]

When we laugh or we cry it's together

Through the rain and the stormiest weather

We gon still be as one it's forever, it's forever

 

[Chorus]

Won't you come on and go with me

Come on ova to my place

Won't you sit ya self down and take a seat

And let me ease ya mind girl

We gon do it our way

 

 

 

PLEASE SAY SOME WORDS TO STOP ME AS I KNOW IT CANNOT HELP, BUT IN MY HEAD IT IS EVERYTHING I WANT TO SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

HELP!

[Weird]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!

 

 

Hope you have a great one and that's pretty funny about the whippied cream inciddent. I wish you were waitressing at The Keg last night. Could have made the night much better for me.

[Weird]

oh and on the way to the restaurant my ex went on how she is doing more than she can handle at work and with work related activities. Me thinks she is in for a world of hurt when she hits the wall and EVERY person I have known or known about who tries to do what she is doing ends up hitting the wall. My best firend's ex did this. They pretty mch broke up because her work was more than she could handle and apparently she recently has hit the wall and is going to quit her job. She probably feels real bad about how she treated my buddy since what she basically replaced him with is now going to be gone and wasn't as bright as she thought it'd be. Oh well. The difference with my ex is that she has chosen to do more than she can handle. She admited this so it isn't like her job in general is just more than her ability; she makes it be more than her ability.

 

I just do not get why she turned out this way...I'm probably being selfish or wishful in thinking but I have this feeling that our relationship and it ending is a mian reason why she is so obsessed with her work and why she I trying to keep herself as occupied as possible, even if it is mroe thna she can handle. Maybe I meant (and still mean) more to her than I think I do. Who knows because it isn't like she'd ever tell me.

 

All I know is right now she and I have differing views on the value of human relationships and what the purpose of life is. She feels work is her main goal/purpose while I feel human relationships are the most important. It sorta sucks that we have this differing view (note it used to be the same before) but that's life I guess.

[djones]

Hey Guys,

 

Atlous--- Happy Birthday!!!

 

Weird-- I am sorry it did not work out for you with this girl, atleast you can say you gave it your all....I think she has a lot of issues she needs to take care for her self...

 

Kodiak-- Good to hear from you, I know what you mean about the holydays I am feeling it too...I dont want to be alone as well, but what can you do, atleast we can be with our family.....

 

hey guys as for me I am going to see that new girl today she asked me out again, I dont know I dont think I have feelings for her, its just feels like a buddy thing..so we will see

[theone44]

Originally posted by Weird

oh and on the way to the restaurant my ex went on how she is doing more than she can handle at work and with work related activities. Me thinks she is in for a world of hurt when she hits the wall and EVERY person I have known or known about who tries to do what she is doing ends up hitting the wall. My best firend's ex did this. They pretty mch broke up because her work was more than she could handle and apparently she recently has hit the wall and is going to quit her job. She probably feels real bad about how she treated my buddy since what she basically replaced him with is now going to be gone and wasn't as bright as she thought it'd be. Oh well. The difference with my ex is that she has chosen to do more than she can handle. She admited this so it isn't like her job in general is just more than her ability; she makes it be more than her ability.

 

I just do not get why she turned out this way...I'm probably being selfish or wishful in thinking but I have this feeling that our relationship and it ending is a mian reason why she is so obsessed with her work and why she I trying to keep herself as occupied as possible, even if it is mroe thna she can handle. Maybe I meant (and still mean) more to her than I think I do. Who knows because it isn't like she'd ever tell me.

 

All I know is right now she and I have differing views on the value of human relationships and what the purpose of life is. She feels work is her main goal/purpose while I feel human relationships are the most important. It sorta sucks that we have this differing view (note it used to be the same before) but that's life I guess.

 

 

 

 

Some women are just full of BS...............

[Weird]

it will be sad but sort of "fitting" in a way if/when she has a breakdown assuming she continues to work herself more than she thinks she is capable of.

 

Very weird girl and her level of drastic change is the biggest I have seen in any person I have known in my 26 years of life in this messed up world.

[mj108]

Atlous---HAPPY B-DAY! WOOHOO! You foamy person. lol Wished I could had seen that. Hear me---BEHAVE YOURSELF. I'm proud...I behaved myself lastnight for my b-day. ha

Wish we all could be partying it up with ya too. Hope you have a great night & you meet your white knight---that's gonna rescue you. You deserve it!

 

Head/Heels---Thanks for everything. You know it seems you and I care so much about our exes...& they are with other people but still we try to be there for them because WE ARE GOOD HEARTED PEOPLE. We love them so much but for some reason they want to be with people that don't give a ***** about them. You and I can't fix them. You are right about that---you can't fix her. Just like I can't fix my ex (his alcholism). It breaks my heart to see him going down the wrong road. The only thing we can do is pray for them & hope for their own sakes--they will wake up & smell the coffee.

Also---I drink responsible. I don't let it control my life but I do like to drink occasionally (except for my 2 week drunk I put on when he left me ). Chester the child molester you say.....well mine is with Wacko the money-hungry Psycho!

You are right...we are all an on-line family here. So cool!

 

Kodiak---I know how it is about the holidays. I'm feeling it too. I'm so sad & down but I'm trying to stay positive. Sometimes it is hard. If you know it is definetly over between you and her...don't send the card! Why bother? Just my advice. BTW have you heard that new song by Nelly & Mcgraw? Damn that song! lol

 

Drjones---Have fun with the new girl! Hope it goes well.

 

Weird---breathe. lol You had a night just like mine.....

Update----My b-day went ok but thought about my ex...he never called. Guess he was getting drunk & celebrating my b-day with psycho. Anyway, the other ex ex came over & started getting all mushy & huggy---I was like WT*****? I asked him..."Um...do you have a girlfriend?" He tells me he just broke up with her 2 days ago. Told me that he would spend the night with me if "I wanted him too." Meanwhile, his buddy tells me that he was still talking to his girlfriend. UNBELIEVABLE! Anyway, I chit-chatted with him & was totally honest with him & told him I was glad he stopped by but he just 'broke' up with someone & I didn't need anyone spending the night with me!

I had fun with my friends eventhough I was probably the 23rd wheel! lol Yes...I could had got me a b-day booty call. But good MJ---wouldn't do that! Sometimes I think I should just misbehave & be BAD like the other ***** up girls out there! Anyway, My b-day wasn't the greatest but I'm not going to complain about it. I had my friends over..friends that love me & respect me (besides the ex ex that just wanted to use me for the night). My ex (soulmate---the one that I love dearly) did not call...I had him on my mind...so much lastnight. I couldn't help it, but I didn't call. Hell, he should had been the one to call me if he wanted to resume contact, right?

 

Anyway, I think that God has better plans for me. I think one day I'm going to meet someone that deserves my love---my good hearted self---my soul. I just have to be patient. Sometimes it's hard to do.

 

But---I will get through this & thanks to everyone on this forum...I wouldn't know what to do without ya!

[Weird]

MJ,

 

Yeah babe, you rule and I have faith you have something awesome coming your way. You are one of those good humans beings out there and deserve nothing but the best.

 

Sometimes I think I should just misbehave & be BAD like the other ***** up girls out there!

 

haha yeah tell me about it. I sometimes feel like I should just give up on having my morals and my desire to find that special someone and just be like a good % of guys out there who just use chicks as pieces of ass. I wont but damn, it sure would be easier to not give a *****.

[mj108]

Weird---You deserve the best too. We all do on this forum.

 

My father always said to me (even when I was a little girl)---Respect others & treat others the way you would want to be treated/respected. I've always followed this motto; however, sometimes I tend to care too much & I get run all over & S*** on! It's my own fault though...I just have a tender heart. I care about others too much, you know?

 

Just like you said---we do have the morals. I will say it was hard for me...I had guys calling me like crazy---I could had hooked up on my b-day. Actually, I would had just loved to be held last night...nothing more.

 

I feel better that I didn't hook up----I partied my b-day with friends & I had a good time. I didn't wake up with---"I shouldn't had hook up with that." OR "Who the hell is beside me?" LOL I woke up alone.

[crazydawg]

aww mj i woulda been there n held u like the lil baaaby u are =)

but then again i'm a guy =)

[Weird]

MJ,

 

Yeah I hear you on that one. You really do get jerked around in this world being a nice person and forgiving people when they screw you over. I would like to think us nice, forgiving and caring people will eventually get rewarded for being good people while still in this world but who the hell knows any more. I'm tried of seeing good people get screwed over by all the selfish douchebags out there.

 

Yes, I am quite the jaded fellow but I tend to look at more like I am just realistic and observant to how people are.

 

Oh and while not the same as a person holding you but here ya go...*hugs for you*

[mj108]

Hey crazydawg! Nice to hear from you again. LOL Yeah, I can be a little baby at times & I can pitch a fit if I don't get what I want too. ha

 

Weird---thanks again. I think the holidays coming up have got me down like everyone else but we'll all survive it.

 

Take care my online family! ha

 

MJ

[Weird]

yeah, the holiday stuff sucks.

 

Ah well

[atlous]

OK see this is how the night went. First of all I went shopping at old navy and bought a short wool skirt and a black top and I wore my black boots. The skirt was a little short but I thought wtf it is my birthday. So we dine out at my work and start there. There was 14 of us. I was having a blast. I didn' t think that I looked so out of the ordinary. Well I end up singing three times, the alcohol must have been running through my body fast because I can't sing! We are all Hammered, I meen blitzed to the nines and ready to dance. We hit this club. I have not been to a dance club for months. In line there are two hot black dudes from calgary. I was thinking nothing of it. One turns around in line and says guys look what we have here? I am still thinking that they are talking to someone else. He says "hey sexy what are you doing?" Most of my friends are practically inside the builing and we are still waiting in line. The big guy finds out it is my birthday and decides without my permission, I kid you not, to lift me up and over his shoulders. Did I forget to mention what I was wearing! umm yeah the whole bar was flashed with my thong! This was the start to a great evening. I sat down and was asked to dance immediately and I said I need to rest for a minute. Then I recieved ohh about four drinks sent by a waitress, by people I do not know. I am completely a mess. This guy comes and asks me to dance and I say sure and he is like you look pretty hot for being that drunk. I was like this is not happening. My hair is everywhere I am physically hot and my make up was starting to resemble alice coopers new look! LOL THe black guy cuts in and says may I have this dance. ummm OK mr So it was a slow song eeek. He was asking me how old I was telling me that he is a salesman for an oil company. The dance floor gets rowdy and he is like ready to haul ass. I am outta here. I go sit back down and this other man comes up and says "I know that I am not black but hey will you dance with me?" shees I wonder if I had a sign that says single come give it a try. Millions of girls came up to me asking where I had bought my skirt. It was an interesting night. I had lost my voice and then these guys thought it was super sexy sexy I thought it was super painful and I had to go home because I couldn't laugh anymore or talk. I get home and literally fall asleep in my clothes because I am too drunk and didn't have a boyfriend to undress me. Everyone said that I could have went home with anyone there but serioulsy how grosse is that. I don't care how drunk I was. I got home and checked my email and a guy that I met in nursing just asked me to go for a drink with him via email. I really like him and think he is very funny! Well I am not feeling good today to many long island ice teas. I am feeling good about myself and where I am. I was not bothered by couples last night I was happy for them. Does this mean that I am healing? Like you MJ I thought that my ex would have called but again he misses my bday. That is ok! I am well on my way to thinking that he died. It works out better when I think that way. I think I am going to go back to bed my head hurts. I wish all of you would have been there we would have danced up a storm. Apparently I was dancing as If I was trying out for a video in my living room. I had no inhabitions last night just me to the core and when people seen the true me everyone flocked to me it was wierd. I think our group took up the whole bar! I am glad to be me again.