How Long For Nc Until The Ex Knows They Have Messed Up!

[head/heels]

man dont call her again ever//....

just send one email saying you would appreciate it if she dropped of your pics and at your house sometime

that is it

no thinking of you or any thing else

 

just thanks,

sukotto

 

do this bc she doesnt deserve you going over to get it...let her drop it off outside and then leave...she doesnt deserve anycontact with you or your family

 

 

keep on going suky!

[mj108]

Sukotto---I think you shouldn't contact the ex;however, if she has some photos you need back then I would MSN her or e-mail her. Get the stuff back & be done with her! I agree with your friend Susan---don't give her the time of day!

 

H/H---Thanks for the advice. I went to a Christmas event at my church lastnight & I didn't realize how many single guys around my age are there. Hmmm...maybe I should go to that singles meet. I mean, I had 4 guys saying Hi & checking me out....I mean, checking me out in a good way. lol I make sure I look to see if they have a ring on their finger. Especially, guys around my age...cause most are married. None of them had a ring on their finger...Thank God. ha Anyway, they are starting the singles thing February 5th. I'm going to pray about it....so remember me in your prayers as I will remember you and everyone else here in mine.

 

Charlane---Thanks for your advice. My buddy & I hung out Saturday. It was great not being the 3rd wheel....lol...I was the 4th. ha Anyway, we watched a movie and it went well. I'm going to remain friends with him...cuz I would hate to ruin a great friendship. I'm not going to expect anything more from it.

 

Drjones---My dad is the same way...stubborn! That's where I get my stubborness from. Anyway, I'm glad to hear your dad is ok & I'm glad to hear you and new girl are doing great.

 

Weird---I'm just hanging out with him as friends. Thanks for your advice. I'm just wondering how long it's going to take to get my ex out of my heart & mind? Sometimes it's frustrating...especially since he treated me like crap!

 

Kodiak--don't send anything else! Glad to hear from ya! Be done with her! I know it's hard....get out & have fun bro!

 

Nick14---I know exactly how you feel. When my ex pops into my mind I'm like "WTF? Why am I thinking of a loser that treated me like crap?" It gets frustrating. I think you're going through the 'phase' again because it's the holidays. Next year will be better my friend! I think for all of us...2005..is going to be the year for us.

 

Hope everyone is doing great! I keep having nightmares---for the last 3 days. Wish they would go away!

[Jip]

HI all,

 

Having a really down day today for no apparent reason - what is that all about?! Felt like bursting into tears all morning - think it might be reality hitting me slap bang in the face again. Glad to see so many of you are doing well.

 

MJ - You really are a tonic girl. You sound like a real catch... esp if all those single (hopefully) guys were checking you out! You get yourself out there - you sound like a very sociable person so meeting lots of guys would be just what the Dr ordered!

Have a similar situation with a friend but he's in NZ just now - glad actually because I may have leaned on him over the next wee while too much - a 7 week break is good for me to get my head straight would hate to ruin a great friendship with him... one of my most genuine friends!

 

Nightmares ... don't you hate it that you have no control over that stuff - you can think positive all day but your mind wanders where it wants to at night! I used to dream of being inhis house and she would be there... not pleasant! aybe try reading a book or watching tv just before bed so maybe you'll dream about what you just saw/read instead - have no idea if that works?!

 

PS haven't met up with him - not a peep since last week since he said he couldn't make it that week... maybe after!

 

Sukotto - Glad everything went well on your date... good for you. Think contact just now with your ex would be bad when your in the early stages of something with someone else but if you feel strong enough then I'd get the photo's back - perhaps the best way is something like a text or something though - not too personal!

 

Geez....Monday blues ain't nice!

[Jip]

Have just re-read my post and given myself a good shake for being so self indulgent/pathetic... Things could be so much worse! Ah perspective....

[head/heels]

MJ--- yeah i had a bad dream too...i think it was bc Nick and i talked a little about our sits. on msn right before bedtime...maybe i wont try that again...at least not about my ex anyway..she is not worth my valuable typing fingers....or my time....so what is this singles thing... i assume it is a meeting or a get together with fun stuff to do for singles ....if it is go out and strut your stuff....

 

Jip- you seem very intelligent, how old are you and what do you do?

 

ok, not much more to say bc i am at work which i dont enjoy... but i will make do and i cant wait to start school back in the fall...time waits for no man....thank goodness since it feels like the days are going by so slowly ....except for it seems like just yesterday my ex and i were best of friends still...sod her and her crazyness

[Sukotto]

I sent her a text asking for my photos and my large memory card that she borrowed and I got a msg back asking how I was and what i'd been up to and how she missed me. I guess she must know that I was out with that other girl. I also went to see Bridget Jones Diary 2 today with my friend Susan, film was quite good, pity that some parts were a bit predictable.

 

So I think i'll just get my stuff off the ex and then try to keep contact with her to a minimum, I'm going to be kind and polite to her when I see her but nothing more,

 

Jip, if you want i'll take you out for a drink in Glasgow if you want cheered up As long as its cool to hang about with a 20 year old, lol.

[Charlane]

Originally posted by Sukotto

I sent her a text asking for my photos and my large memory card that she borrowed and I got a msg back asking how I was and what i'd been up to and how she missed me. I guess she must know that I was out with that other girl. I also went to see Bridget Jones Diary 2 today with my friend Susan, film was quite good, pity that some parts were a bit predictable.

 

So I think i'll just get my stuff off the ex and then try to keep contact with her to a minimum, I'm going to be kind and polite to her when I see her but nothing more,

 

Jip, if you want i'll take you out for a drink in Glasgow if you want cheered up As long as its cool to hang about with a 20 year old, lol.

 

I need to qualify what I said to you Sukotto because I don't want to ruin your chances, too, in the event that she really does make an honest effort to rectify herself. NEVER CALL HER UNLESS SHE CALLS YOU FIRST. You can always return calls just do not initiate these. When she does call, keep it short and nice. Be polite. You are above anything else. The important thing with her is to maintain some distance and keep your emotions in check. Do not speak in terms of intimacy. She needs to know that you are practicing caution around her if not overtly. If you are consistent with this you might just get her curiousity. If she asks if you are dating let her know you are and NEVER ask her if she is. That is you taking interest in her personal life outside of the norm and if anything, you should not care about that at this very point in time.

 

I would like you to get back together. Unfortunately you are related to game playing and exes who leave are usually selfish and self-serving brats. At some point they grow up but usually after some life changing event makes that happen and it could be a grave event then too. Just maintain your self-respect and if she doesn't see the kind of person you are, then someone else will.

 

My best to you.

[Weird]

kodiak & nick,

 

sheeet dudes, I believe it. These women we try and deal with are clueless selfish bitches. A normal person would say "thanks" for getting a bday card or greeting but not these selfish cunts. Bugs me both of you had to experience that crap but at least it was a good life lesson on how selfish and childish people you love (or loved) can be.

 

MJ,

 

what kind of nightmares did you have? BTW I agree that you are a good catch.

 

sukotto,

 

glad you didn't call and funny to hear her say she misses you in that text message. hahaha women....

 

 

That reminds me...my buddy who broke up a few weeks ago finally came online and told me the whole story. His ex acted like a damn child too and for a few weeks was feeding him BS about how much she loved him and talking about marriage, etc. What did she do? Broke up with him over the phone and while he was at work!!! The best si they go to the same university and I geuss have seen each other a few times around campus and she is doing the CLASSIC thing of basically acting like she wants him back. Tells him how she misses him, and acting jealous that other girls might be interested in him, etc. Hilarious. How long were they together you peeps are wodnering? FIVE YEARS. I am just glad he has seen the light and won't get back with her. They sorta had a break a few months ago and my other buddy and I were giving him advice that he didn't listen to and regretfully, he got screwed over by not following it. Oh well. He at least learned that lesson which is more valuable than listening to my sound advice from my past experience.

 

Just happy my buddy is OK and isn't all depressed over this and realizes she is not worth his time and she changed for the worse like 99% of all females seem to do.

[theone44]

Originally posted by Weird

kodiak & nick,

 

sheeet dudes, I believe it. These women we try and deal with are clueless selfish bitches. A normal person would say "thanks" for getting a bday card or greeting but not these selfish cunts. Bugs me both of you had to experience that crap but at least it was a good life lesson on how selfish and childish people you love (or loved) can be.

 

MJ,

 

what kind of nightmares did you have? BTW I agree that you are a good catch.

 

sukotto,

 

glad you didn't call and funny to hear her say she misses you in that text message. hahaha women....

 

 

That reminds me...my buddy who broke up a few weeks ago finally came online and told me the whole story. His ex acted like a damn child too and for a few weeks was feeding him BS about how much she loved him and talking about marriage, etc. What did she do? Broke up with him over the phone and while he was at work!!! The best si they go to the same university and I geuss have seen each other a few times around campus and she is doing the CLASSIC thing of basically acting like she wants him back. Tells him how she misses him, and acting jealous that other girls might be interested in him, etc. Hilarious. How long were they together you peeps are wodnering? FIVE YEARS. I am just glad he has seen the light and won't get back with her. They sorta had a break a few months ago and my other buddy and I were giving him advice that he didn't listen to and regretfully, he got screwed over by not following it. Oh well. He at least learned that lesson which is more valuable than listening to my sound advice from my past experience.

 

Just happy my buddy is OK and isn't all depressed over this and realizes she is not worth his time and she changed for the worse like 99% of all females seem to do.

 

 

 

 

"This message is for all of you guys on Love Shack"

 

"what goes around come right back around to you". the same things the exes did toward us will come right back to them,and they will feel as worst as we did. Payback is a bi.......ch. One of my ex of long time ago dump me and went back to her ex-husband, and she is getting dogged out just about everyday,because she use to call me every day and tell me about it. So,guess who is getting the last laugh. One day guys we will get the last laugh over our exes when they start calling you, and complaining about the guys that they with, is mistreating them.

[Sukotto]

Well she phoned tonight and asked when would be suitable to give me the things and she asked if I wanted to go skating, its something that we use to do every year and stupidly I said yes. Now I dont want to back down, the thing I'm going skating with this new girl Heather. Think I should arrange it on the same night and just jump between the two?

 

I can say a 100% at this moment in time that I have no desire to get back together with my ex, though I would like to work things out so I could at least associate with her every once in a while, we had a few unique interests and we're no doubt going to run into each other alot. I know that once we're in the same room that some of the attraction will no doubt come back. Whats the best way to make clear that I have no desire for any sort of non plutonic relactionship?

 

Thanks for your advice guys, I'll try and keep the conversation about her personal life to a minimum.

 

Now the next question is do I tell Heather than I'm meeting my ex or should I just avoid mentioning that?

[theone44]

Originally posted by Sukotto

Well she phoned tonight and asked when would be suitable to give me the things and she asked if I wanted to go skating, its something that we use to do every year and stupidly I said yes. Now I dont want to back down, the thing I'm going skating with this new girl Heather. Think I should arrange it on the same night and just jump between the two?

 

I can say a 100% at this moment in time that I have no desire to get back together with my ex, though I would like to work things out so I could at least associate with her every once in a while, we had a few unique interests and we're no doubt going to run into each other alot. I know that once we're in the same room that some of the attraction will no doubt come back. Whats the best way to make clear that I have no desire for any sort of non plutonic relactionship?

 

Thanks for your advice guys, I'll try and keep the conversation about her personal life to a minimum.

 

Now the next question is do I tell Heather than I'm meeting my ex or should I just avoid mentioning that?

 

 

 

 

Go ahead and have fun skating with your ex. I wouldn't tell Heather about it..remember you do have a life before u met any of these girls. Just have fun with your ex on a friendly basic ain't no harm in that. Then take Heather out after that. just plan it 4 or 5 hour apart. Boy man you got a lot of energy you got two date.wish i had a lot of juice like you. Ok. good luck on your dates.

[Nick14]

Originally posted by theone44

"This message is for all of you guys on Love Shack"

 

"what goes around come right back around to you". the same things the exes did toward us will come right back to them,and they will feel as worst as we did. Payback is a bi.......ch. One of my ex of long time ago dump me and went back to her ex-husband, and she is getting dogged out just about everyday,because she use to call me every day and tell me about it. So,guess who is getting the last laugh. One day guys we will get the last laugh over our exes when they start calling you, and complaining about the guys that they with, is mistreating them.

 

Funny, how I see everyone here, well with the exception of a few that there exs still call them or at least on a minimal scale. Mine..sigh..well what can I say, 3 months and she has not been the one to establish contact first. I guess you can say, if you ask me what i wanted for xmas, one of those wishes would be for her to contact me first and at least say Merry xmas or how are you doing, to at least show me that she still cares on a social level. I guess I am jealous of some people here who do still talk to the dumpee, even if its not for the right reasons. Guess I am just bored and need a challenge . It is funny but heres alittle scoreboard action with the ex's contact you guys on there first go around.

 

Ex's who have contacted our LS people on there first try after our many attempts.

Wierd

Suk

MJ

Dr

Head

Urban Rubble

could be more,haha

 

Ex's who are still chicken shyt and have not contacted us yet.

Nick

Kodiak

wantan

hmm..who else anyone wanna add on to it.

 

I am not trying to make this post look bad, but it does kinda suck and it sort of makes me alittle jealous. It was pretty funny how head and I were talking on msn last night and since his ex dumped him in the beg of august and mined at the end of august, so i asked him. "your ex contacted you in october about a stupid computer", he was like "Ya". So I am like "well guess your ex beat my ex first and contacted you first,haha". That was a great laugh, even if it was for a minute. Well, its monday and even though I am in Cali, I am still trying to get by a "New York minute, one step at a time".

[Sukotto]

Originally posted by theone44

Go ahead and have fun skating with your ex. I wouldn't tell Heather about it..remember you do have a life before u met any of these girls. Just have fun with your ex on a friendly basic ain't no harm in that. Then take Heather out after that. just plan it 4 or 5 hour apart. Boy man you got a lot of energy you got two date.wish i had a lot of juice like you. Ok. good luck on your dates.

 

I guess trying to have two dates at the same time doesn't work like it does in the movies

 

I've been chatting to heather for the past 3 hours now via sms, the joys of getting to know someone knew is so mucuh fun and i'll just avoid bringing up "us" and erm heather while out with the ex and just hope she doesn't pull on any of my heart strings, the only problem which I've stated in earlier posts is that my ex can read me like a book, just from facial expressions and body language. Worse than a polygraph.

 

I think I'm going to go out on Thursday with my friend Susan and see if I can find another person to date, maybe I could get a lunch date, dinner date and evening on the one day.

[Charlane]

Originally posted by Sukotto

Well she phoned tonight and asked when would be suitable to give me the things and she asked if I wanted to go skating, its something that we use to do every year and stupidly I said yes. Now I dont want to back down, the thing I'm going skating with this new girl Heather. Think I should arrange it on the same night and just jump between the two?

 

I can say a 100% at this moment in time that I have no desire to get back together with my ex, though I would like to work things out so I could at least associate with her every once in a while, we had a few unique interests and we're no doubt going to run into each other alot. I know that once we're in the same room that some of the attraction will no doubt come back. Whats the best way to make clear that I have no desire for any sort of non plutonic relactionship?

 

Thanks for your advice guys, I'll try and keep the conversation about her personal life to a minimum.

 

Now the next question is do I tell Heather than I'm meeting my ex or should I just avoid mentioning that?

 

I"ve got this for you Sukotto......BREAK THE DATE! And then in the same sentence tell her you are sorry and would still like to see her only it will have to be at another time. Give her any bloody excuse that you can think of to include your parents or a friend needs you for something but tell her how you really wanted to spend time with her, it's just that you can't. Play her game. Didn't she do this to you? Have her eating out of your hand.......

[Charlane]

Originally posted by Sukotto

Well she phoned tonight and asked when would be suitable to give me the things and she asked if I wanted to go skating, its something that we use to do every year and stupidly I said yes. Now I dont want to back down, the thing I'm going skating with this new girl Heather. Think I should arrange it on the same night and just jump between the two?

 

I can say a 100% at this moment in time that I have no desire to get back together with my ex, though I would like to work things out so I could at least associate with her every once in a while, we had a few unique interests and we're no doubt going to run into each other alot. I know that once we're in the same room that some of the attraction will no doubt come back. Whats the best way to make clear that I have no desire for any sort of non plutonic relactionship?

 

Thanks for your advice guys, I'll try and keep the conversation about her personal life to a minimum.

 

Now the next question is do I tell Heather than I'm meeting my ex or should I just avoid mentioning that?

 

 

I would tell Heather. She deserves HONESTY. Tell her that there is nothing between you and the ex and that she is giving you your things back and at the same time chatting it up. If Heather is into you, she will grin and bear it mostly because of the honesty. Just call her after you and the ex meet and Heather will be putty.

[Urban Rubble01]

I"ve got this for you Sukotto......BREAK THE DATE! And then in the same sentence tell her you are sorry and would still like to see her only it will have to be at another time. Give her any bloody excuse that you can think of to include your parents or a friend needs you for something but tell her how you really wanted to spend time with her, it's just that you can't. Play her game. Didn't she do this to you? Have her eating out of your hand.......

 

I have to COMPLETELY disagree with this.

 

How we act in these situations tells alot about who we are as people. If you choose to be malicious and go at your ex with revenge in mind, no matter how harmless that revenge is, you have chosen the easy way. The spineless way. It takes a good, strong person to be able to forgive others for the dumb things they do and not hold it against them. You love this girl, or at least, you loved her at one time. Even though she has treated you wrongly, if you can manage to be MATURE and forgive her you will grow as a person and you will be better for it.

 

Now, if your ex was extremely cold and calculating, and she hurt you on purpose, that it a different matter. But if your ex was simply careless and hurt you without really wanting to, then you would be wise to forgive her for it. Revenge for the sake of revenge accomplishes nothing, it never has. Forgiveness can lead to personal growth, wisdom and possibly even bringing you and your ex's old feelings back.

 

Now, this isn't to say you shouldn't break the date. Do it if you wish. But don't do it with the intention of messing with her head or getting her interested.

 

Actually, to reinforce my point, I'll tell a little story from a book I recently read: During the Vietnam war a teenage Vietnamese girl and her mother were living in a wealthy factory owner's house in Saigon, working as housekeepers. One night the owner of the house slept with the girl and got her pregnant. When the man's wife found out, she demanded that they leave the house. Anh (the man) grudgingly accepted, he sent them out of the house with some money and a promise to help them out. Anh broke the promise and never sent them any money. The girl's mother was angry at both of them, naturally. Her friends told her that she could go after Anh for money, but she was a traditional peasant woman and she felt that to forgive Anh would be the honorable thing to do. 15 years later, after the liberation of Vietnam, the girl's mother was wallowing in the slums of Saigon, poor as she had ever been. Le Ly (the girl) had long since left Vietnam. Around this time, Anh decided to track down the mother. His factories had been nationalized by the communists but he was still well off and had a good job. When he found her he put her up in a house, began taking care of her. Basically, saved her life. If she had gone after Anh she would have gotten enough cash to last, perhaps, a year or two at most. Because of her forgiveness and maturity she was rewarded. (In the book she related all this to a bigger point of how if the Vietnamese are ever to heal from the war they must forgive the Americans for what they did, but that's a little too in depth).

 

Now, you can call that God, or coincidence, or karma, or whatever. It doesn't matter. All I'm trying to say is, even if you can't see how it will benefit you, it is honorable to forgive people for MISTAKES they have made.

[Charlane]

Originally posted by Urban Rubble01

 

 

I have to COMPLETELY disagree with this.

 

How we act in these situations tells alot about who we are as people. If you choose to be malicious and go at your ex with revenge in mind, no matter how harmless that revenge is, you have chosen the easy way. The spineless way. It takes a good, strong person to be able to forgive others for the dumb things they do and not hold it against them. You love this girl, or at least, you loved her at one time. Even though she has treated you wrongly, if you can manage to be MATURE and forgive her you will grow as a person and you will be better for it.

 

Now, if your ex was extremely cold and calculating, and she hurt you on purpose, that it a different matter. But if your ex was simply careless and hurt you without really wanting to, then you would be wise to forgive her for it. Revenge for the sake of revenge accomplishes nothing, it never has. Forgiveness can lead to personal growth, wisdom and possibly even bringing you and your ex's old feelings back.

 

Now, this isn't to say you shouldn't break the date. Do it if you wish. But don't do it with the intention of messing with her head or getting her interested.

 

 

 

When in Rome, do as the Romans do. You're already at ZERO. What do you have to lose? It's all about psychology with selfish people. Treat her as she treated you. Let's face it, you were liking it enough to stay with her FOR ANYTHING. So give her a taste of her own medicine.

[Urban Rubble01]

When in Rome, do as the Romans do. You're already at ZERO. What do you have to lose? It's all about psychology with selfish people. Treat her as she treated you. Let's face it, you were liking it enough to stay with her FOR ANYTHING. So give her a taste of her own medicine.

 

And what do you have to gain by all of this spite and vindictiveness ? What does it accomplish aside from hurting the other person and taking away some of your own personal dignity ?

 

This idea that we have to "sink to their level" to somehow make it "even" is ridiculous, dangerous and a plague on our society.

 

As for "what do you have to lose" ? How about dignity ? Pride ? Honor ? Self respect ? I pride myself on being a reasonable person who does not hurt people if there is nothing to gain (except revenge). To lose that would be a crushing blow to the positive way in which I view myself. I will not sink to the level of a worm who can't handle his own hurt feelings and feels the need to lash out even when it's obvious that won't make his pain go away.

 

And if there are people who are comforted by hurting their ex's then I just feel bad for them. Remember, it's not like she had an all out affair behind his back with his best friend and then killed his cat. She is guilty of being selfish, sure, but that's a mistake, not a systematic attempt to hurt him.

[Charlane]

Originally posted by Urban Rubble01

 

 

And what do you have to gain by all of this spite and vindictiveness ? What does it accomplish aside from hurting the other person and taking away some of your own personal dignity ?

 

This idea that we have to "sink to their level" to somehow make it "even" is ridiculous, dangerous and a plague on our society.

 

As for "what do you have to lose" ? How about dignity ? Pride ? Honor ? Self respect ? I pride myself on being a reasonable person who does not hurt people if there is nothing to gain (except revenge). To lose that would be a crushing blow to the positive way in which I view myself. I will not sink to the level of a worm who can't handle his own hurt feelings and feels the need to lash out even when it's obvious that won't make his pain go away.

 

And if there are people who are comforted by hurting their ex's then I just feel bad for them. Remember, it's not like she had an all out affair behind his back with his best friend and then killed his cat. She is guilty of being selfish, sure, but that's a mistake, not a systematic attempt to hurt him.

 

Look I agree. I HATE acting like a bitch. I'm not like that and that's why I have an ex now, too. My point is that if he wants her back knowing where she is at in all of this at this time, then this might do it. He's not a player like that and we all know this. At no point in time did I say for him to say mean things to her or be a total a*s. He would hate himself later for it. I know I would.

 

It just appears to me that being reasonable is why we are all here.

[Jip]

Originally posted by head/heels

 

 

Jip- you seem very intelligent, how old are you and what do you do?

 

 

Why thank you - I wish I was! I'm 26 and a (valuation) surveyor ( yawn yawn... grey suits and the old boys network) .. Don't know how I ended up doing what I do wish I'd done something medical or at least helping others. So much for career advice when I left school! You seem pretty switched on yourself.... must be a bright spark to be training as a Dr (I have got that right, haven't I?)

 

Sukotto - Thanks very much for the invite !! Of course its cool to hang with a 20 yr old - Most of my friends are younger than me (v immature for my age). Mind you think you'll be pretty busy with your two dates.... Its the old cliche.... they're like buses... nothing for a while and then 2 come along at once.. He he! Fingers crossed you pull it off and I hope your ex doesn't mess with your head too much when you see her! If she asks about Heather - just you tell it like it is!

 

MJ - Think your dream thing's catching had a dream we were as normal last night don't you hate that!! Prob cos I was awake til 1 am thinking about him... my own stupid fault ( slapping forehead with palm of my hand) but it was just one of those days I guess!!

[Weird]

Originally posted by Charlane

I"ve got this for you Sukotto......BREAK THE DATE! And then in the same sentence tell her you are sorry and would still like to see her only it will have to be at another time. Give her any bloody excuse that you can think of to include your parents or a friend needs you for something but tell her how you really wanted to spend time with her, it's just that you can't. Play her game. Didn't she do this to you? Have her eating out of your hand.......

 

I don't think he should play teenager style games with her. If he wants to go skating he should. If he doesnt then he should just tell her that.

 

Also, he says he does not want her back so why waste his time playing this game crap?

[bigacesteve]

I was thinking the same thing as Weird.

 

Also, he says he does not want her back so why waste his time playing this game crap?

 

Can't your ex just post the photos? Why go skating together when you just want your photos? Seems like more is going on??

 

If I'd just started seeing a new girl and she said she was going skating with her ex b/f to get some photos back... alarm bells would be ringing. I'd be thinking... "hmmm hang on a minute why would she need to go skating with her ex to get her photos? Isn't that like a date?"

 

Tread carefully Sukotto if your ex knows about you seeing this new girl, she could be trying a bit of the old sabotage? Watch yourself or you could end up with nothing youth.

 

I myself think that if you're happy with this new girl and you can't honestly see you and the ex sorting things out properly, don't be seeing the ex; give the new girl a chance. I agree with Charlane; I'd cancel this skating thing and get the photos back a less 'dangerous' way.

 

I also agree with UR01 about not sinking to their level BUT you've got to watch your own arse because your ex and our ex's have shown before that they really don't give a monkeys. It's not playing games it's protecting yourself from going through this painful s*** again.

 

Just my opinion anyway. Basically be careful dude.

[Charlane]

bigacesteve, I got your wink on match! Thank you for it. I read your profile a litte and then wham! I deleted it accidentally with a few others. Would you wink at me again? I would really like to read yours.....(CharlaneinTx).

 

We have to wonder at each other why we are doing this don't we? I mean I see an obviously good looking man such as you and think why hasn't some good woman kept him from putting his picture up in the first place? Have people lost theirs minds? I'm trying to make sense of all of it.

[bigacesteve]

Thanks Charlane, that's very nice of you.

 

Women do look stunned when I tell them I'm single, they look at me in disbelief. I get asked a lot what happened with me and the ex and I still can't explain it; sad really but hay ho nothing I can do about it.

 

I do get attention but it only seems that married or taken women have the bottle to talk to me. I approach women and they immediately say "aren't you tall?" and then look at me waiting for an answer... It's unbe-*****ing-levable. It completely wrecks the mood because I get it all the time and I'd just like to hear something new. I always feel like saying "yes and you're really observant, are you a detective?"

 

To be honest with you Charlane I've not been on the online dating thing for ages, just don't get any bites. Oh apart from some dodgy Russian girl; stunning but was talking about marriage, babies and moving in with me before I'd even replied. I didn't reply.

 

I'll get on and send your sexy self a wink. Think I'll update my profile; change the bait a bit. I think the 6ft 7 on my profile puts most women off. In real life I often get told I look impressive, some women just stare at me mouth open, really freaky. Quite a few lads have said they wished they were me, which I find very complimentary. One lad said that if he was me with my martial arts background, he'd be in jail by now. Thinking about it, he probably would; best that he's not me.

 

You're right, we shouldn't need things like online dating agencies but people are different now and want everything given to them on a plate. Too much like hard work to approach someone and actually speak to them. Easier to look through some thumbnail pictures, pick out the good looking ones and then read what they're about.

 

With how loud bars and clubs are now and how deep my voice is, conversation is becoming near impossible. Just end up shouting at each other. My voice must blend in with the subwoofer or something.

 

Going home now. Well it's my home for now. Police Sgt rang me today telling me that my friend who I live with is a bad boy and I can't live there anymore. I live with my 2 best mates and I know that 1 of them has had a few run in's with the police. They are good lads really but he has a record now so I've got to leave for my career. I've got to find new accomodation before I start my training. So guess who has got to move back in with his parents for a month? Arsebiscuits!

 

Laters all

[Sukotto]

I think someone should get a cookie for predicting what my ex would do.

 

Today I bumped into her while shopping for a new coat and she offered to help me and I accepted since it was going horribly wrong, I'd been wandering for about an hour from shop to shop but most had a fur collar and make me look like a ned (scally / chav / bam). So she helped me get a new coat and It was all pretty plutonic, then I noticed some jeans I wanted and I went to try them on and I came out of the changing room to show her what they looked like and she commented on how i looked good and i'd lost some weight etc

 

Her train wasn't for another 30 minutes, I'd made her miss the one she was planning to get so I offered her a lift home, its only 5 minutes from where I stay anyway. She accepted and when we got in the car she gave me a hug and a kiss. I was like wtf and just started the car and started driving, the nervous twitch came back in my leg, luckily she didn't notice.

 

I dropped her off at the house and we both went in, she was going to look the photos out and give them to me now and I thought that if I done that then I could cancel the date. About 30 seconds after we sat down she was on top of me and damn i'm weak. Next thing I know we're naked on the bed but I then realised what I was going to do and stopped and redressed.

 

She told me that she made a huge mistake and that she can see that now, I just wanted to say DUH! I asked her about the guy and she said she hadn't spoken to him in over a month and that she'd last got a msg from him last week. So she asked what now and I just said we'll see and told her we'd chat on Friday.

 

Now i'm more confused than ever, they both have their plus points. But Lynsey has the history on her side which is both good and bad, history includes the cheating on me. Where Heather I don't know too well but I'm enjoying her company at the moment.