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Scared of Saying I do Again


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I am needing advice on a problem I am having with my fiance of 6 months. We have lived together for over a year. There are many things in our releationship I beginning to have doubts about. First this is my 3rd marriage and I am 38 and this will be his first marriage and he is almost 41, and no kids. ( I have 2 teens). In the last few months I have noticed that we are growing apart in some ways. He says that I hold in my emotions and it makes him feel like he has done something wrong. This is not the case, He does things that are very hurtful without any forethought on how I might react . We both work , I have a office job and I put in a steady 40 . He does flooring and gets home sometimes 2 to 3 hrs ahead of me . he averages about 33 hrs a week. But when I get home its my duty to clean cook and do laundry while he sits in front of the computer and flirt with online women. I have told him that this bothers me just to have him say " well you flirt too" I am to the point that I am ready to cut off Net service. I have went into chat rooms and talked with all different people and had men flirting with me. But I always let them know I am not looking and dont flirt . He does not do this he continues to chat with these women and let them disrespect our relationship. He even carries this out into real life. When we go anywhere He is ALWAYS checking out any woman that has a small waist and is half attractive. And he makes no secret about it . Even tho he know that I starve myself to stay slim for him. I swear sometimes I feel like he is a tom cat on the prowl. Even tho he is Always at home Thank alot for any advice DEWY

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:sick: Eww. This guy screams "run like hell" to me. You guys should maybe re-evaluate the relationship. Make sure he's into you. And open up your feelings for him in return. Good luck.
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savethedrama4allama

I would be scared to say "I do" to this man also. By now you know that whatever issues you have while engaged, will still be there if not worse once you're married. You owe it to yourself and your children to work these issues out before you proceed.

 

If he is unwilling to stop visiting the chatrooms (and I think you should stop as well for fairness) then obviously he is not willing to do what it takes to make your relationship work.

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