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Girlfriend avoiding my family. Why?


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Hi, all. I'm seeking your counsel once again...

 

My girlfriend seems to be avoiding my family, particularly my parents. If they're around, she makes excuses not to come over. I'm over her house with her entire family all the time. But she'll say things like "I don't want to go if I wasn't invited" or "I'm not dressed appropriately." The last time I suggested she see them, she said something like "why would I want to do that right now?"

 

I've asked her two or three times if she's afraid of my family, and she says no. Whenever they DO see each other, my family clearly loves her and they seem to get on just fine. I'm very good at spotting tension between people, but I haven't seen any.

 

What do you think is going on??? :confused:

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No way to tell without more detail. If you have been dating a year or more, this is a red flag and she may be making exit plans, if 6 months or less, it's probably a sign she wants to keep dating but not ready yet for close family relations.

 

2 years. But she's been doing this for most of the relationship.

 

More details: my family is very intuitive with people and she knows this. They are also leaders in church (all involved in this story are religious), so could it be some kind of guilt that she's hiding? She's had boundary issues with male friends including exes in the past, and has revealed that she cheated before she met me. She was involved with 5 guys simultaneously. In fact, when I said I wanted to date her in the beginning, she dumped her bf (2 years ago). She said that she was not in love with any of them, but she was serious about me. :rolleyes:

 

Thoughts? What is your analysis, and how should I deal with this?

 

Anyone can answer. Thanks

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